All characters, aside from BTS (Namjoon, Seokjin, Yoongi, Hoseok, Jimin, Taehyung, Jeongguk) are original characters.

~

    "It just doesn't seem like you're present, that's all,"

    "I'm right here, Taehyung,"

Taehyung deflates, looking down at his hands from where he's straddling Namjoon. He had tried initiating something since Namjoon didn't feel comfortable doing so anymore, but it felt completely one sided.

    "Do you not want me to touch you?" He asks looking up at him.

    "You're reading too much into everything lately," Namjoon says looking up at him. "What am I supposed to do?"

    "I can't help but notice your body language," Taehyung says. "Are you not attracted to me anymore?"

    "We went through this already, Taehyung," Namjoon sighs. "I'm attracted to you, you know I am."

    "Then why aren't you touching me?"

    "You hate when I touch you."

Taehyung glanced off, that was a fair point. "I told you that I'm trying to work through that. I can't work through it if you just sit there like a mannequin while I kiss you."

    "Okay, fine," Namjoon says putting his hands on his waist. "Is that better?"

Taehyung shrugs. "Maybe I should just suck you off," He says moving off Namjoon's lap, kneeling on the ground in front of him. "That always seems to work~"

    "Wait, come on, Taehyung," Namjoon laughs as he stops him. "I don't want you to do it like it's a chore. What's up with you?"

    "Is it a crime to want to get my boyfriend off?" Taehyung asks, sitting back on his heels and looking up at Namjoon. "I should be asking what's up with you. Why don't you want me to suck your dick?"

    "Because I don't want you to do it like you have to or something," Namjoon says. "I'm fine."

    "If I'm not getting you off then who is?" Taehyung asks crossing his arms. "You're a guy, Namjoon, I know you're getting it somewhere."

Namjoon laughs uncomfortably. "Are you really being insecure right now? Look at you, Taehyung. I'd be a fucking idiot to cheat on you."

Taehyung looks down. "Then why are you rejecting me?"

    "I'm not, I'm just not in the mood," Namjoon says tapping his chin. "You're beautiful, okay? And I love you, so much. Don't doubt yourself."

    "I love you too," Taehyung says looking up at him. "I'm sorry I'm being over sensitive."

"It's fine, now get up," Namjoon laughs, pulling Taehyung up. "Let's watch a movie or something."

"Alright, I'm gonna change first," Taehyung says standing and heading to his room. "You can pick."

"Okay," Namjoon says grabbing the remote. Just as Taehyung starts to leave there's a knock on the door, stopping him in his tracks. "Who could that be?"

"I don't know," He says checking the time on his phone. "Did you order something?"

"Not me," Namjoon says as Taehyung goes to answer.

When he opens his apartment door the last person he expects to see stands there waiting.

"T-Taeyeon?" He says looking at the woman in shock, the color completely draining from his face.

"Taehyung-ah," She says looking at him with a nervous look in her eyes. Her hands fidgeting anxiously with the strap of her purse. "I was worried you wouldn't be home."

Taehyung blinks wordlessly at his sister, an endless chill running down his spine as he stares at her.

"Is everything okay, Tae?" Namjoon asks walking over, looking at Taeyeon before looking back at Taehyung. "What's wrong?"

"I-I..." Taehyung's voice cracks, his hands visibly shaking as he steps away from the door.

"Taehyung?" Namjoon says, but his voice is muffled in Taehyung's ears. The only prominent sound being his heart pounding in his ears.

He felt sick suddenly, his chest was tightening uncontrollably, and he felt like he was a million miles away from everything around him. He hears Namjoon's voice calling him, but his voice is lodged in his throat.

"I-I have t-to~ I need t-to change," He stammers out before walking away, his legs barely holding his weight as he rushes to his room.

Namjoon's eyes follow him worriedly until he's gone, he looks back at Taeyeon. "Who are you?"

"I'm his sister," She says looking up at Namjoon. "His older sister."

"O-Oh," Namjoon says, trying to control his facial expression as a feeling of realization washes over him. "Come in, sorry."

"It's fine," Taeyeon says stepping into the apartment. "Is now a bad time? I can come back."

"No, I'm sure he's fine," Namjoon says closing the front door. "Can I get you anything?"

"No," Taeyeon says. "What was your name again?"

"Oh, Namjoon, sorry," Namjoon says bowing slightly. "I'm Taehyung's boyfriend."

"Ah, I see," Taeyeon smiles. "It's nice to meet you."

"Likewise," Namjoon nods. "I'm just gonna check on him."

Taeyeon nods. "I'll wait here."

Namjoon nods again before walking down the hall to Taehyung's room, knocking on the door before walking in. "Tae?" He hears Taehyung's labored breathing before he sees him sitting on the ground on the other side of the bed. "Hey, Tae, what's going on?"

Taehyung shakes his head, pressing the heels of his hands into his eyes as Namjoon kneels beside him. "N-No,"

"Taehyung~" Namjoon starts, placing a hand on Taehyung's shoulder.

"No!" He shouts, startling Namjoon as he pulls away. "Don't touch me."

Namjoon hold both his hands up. "I'm not, I won't. Are you gonna tell me what's going on?"

Taehyung sobs harder into his hands, squeezing his eyes shut to try and stop the images flashing through his mind. His skin crawls as image after image flashes through his mind, memory after memory. He feels sick and he feels disgusted. "No, g-god, no. Please, no~"

"Taehyung," Namjoon tries. "You're freaking me out now."

"L-Leave me alone," Taehyung sobs uncontrollably, his entire body trembling.

"What?" Namjoon asks, looking at him with worried eyes. "I don't understand, Taehyung."

"J-Jeongguk," Taehyung sobs, the name coming out clearer than his previous demand.

"Jeongguk?" Namjoon asks. "Who's Jeongguk, Taehyung?"

"Call Jeongguk," Taehyung says, his chest heaving hysterically. "Please, call Jeongguk."

"Okay?" Namjoon says in confusion as he grabs Taehyung's phone from the bed. Putting his password in before searching his contacts for the name Jeongguk until he finds it. "Okay Jeongguk. What do you want me to say?"

Taehyung continues to cry, nearly hyperventilating on his bedroom floor.

"Okay, I'm calling," Namjoon says clicking the contact. "I'll just tell him to come here, okay?"

Taehyung manages to nods his head, his fingers tugging at his own hair to try and ground himself. He didn't know what to do, he didn't know how to control his breathing or his thoughts. He needed Jeongguk.

He needed him to tell him what to do.

~

"You're okay, lay your head down,"

Taehyung tries to relax, he genuinely tries to calm down. But his hands still shake and tears still fall as he lies down in his bed.

Jeongguk sighs, sitting down on the edge of the bed in front of him, rubbing his back in soothing motions.

The call was completely unexpected, especially at eight o'clock at night. But he felt like he had no choice but to come. He couldn't not come when Taehyung was calling him. If he was desperate enough to call than it was important enough to come.

When Namjoon told him that he was having a panic attack he originally had no idea what to do about it. He was over forty five minutes away, an hour including the time it took him to get dressed.

But when he got here he seemed to naturally take over the situation. Talking Taehyung through the attack as best he knew how.

It was strange at first, being with Taehyung outside of the clinic, but he quickly put those feelings aside to help him.

"Did she leave?" Taehyung asks, his voice shaking on the way out.

"I think so," Jeongguk says, his voice calm and gentle. "Do you want me check?"

"No, I don't want you to leave me," Taehyung says looking away, swallowing hard.

"I'm not leaving," Jeongguk says. "Are you okay?"

Taehyung nods. "I-I don't know what happened,"

"That's okay," Jeongguk says, still rubbing his back. "You were just shocked to see her I'm sure."

"I can't believe she came here," Taehyung says. "I-I can't believe she was here, in m-my apartment~"

Jeongguk shushes him. "It's okay, Taehyung, I promise. Don't focus on that, focus on breathing, okay?"

Taehyung nods, taking an unsteady breath and closing his eyes. "Okay,"

"You can sleep if you're tired," Jeongguk says looking down at him. "I won't leave."

"Thank you, Jeongguk," Taehyung says genuinely. "Thank you for coming."

"You needed me, of course I was going to come," Jeongguk chuckles. "Now go to sleep. I'll be here."

Taehyung smiles softly, relaxing into his pillow and focusing on the sound of Jeongguk's breathing. His breaths are slow and steady, so calming in the silence of his bedroom.

Jeongguk waits there until he's sure Taehyung is asleep, saying his same softly to be sure before he pulls his hand away. He sits there for a few extra minutes just to be sure, then he stands and leaves the room.

Namjoon stands from where he's waiting on the couch, a nervous expression on his face. "Is he alright?"

"Oh, yeah, he's fine," Jeongguk nods, his eyes flickering over to Taehyung's sister. "He's just a little shaken up."

"Did he say why?" Namjoon asks.

Jeongguk's eyes travel to Taeyeon before returning to Namjoon. "I can't really say," he shrugs. "He should be fine though."

"It's my fault," Taeyeon says standing. "I should've called before I showed up."

"He just needs some time," Jeongguk says looking at her. "It was just a shock, that's all."

"I should go," She says grabbing her purse, bowing at the two of them before walking to the door. "I'll call Taehyung tomorrow."

"I'm leaving too, I'll walk you down." Jeongguk says, taking the opportunity to escape being alone with Namjoon.

"You two take care," Namjoon says. "I'll make sure Taehyung's alright."

Jeongguk nods, walking out of the apartment after Taeyeon. "After you," He says gesturing for her to go down the stairs first.

She bows her head with a smile before leading the way down. There's an awkward silence in the air as they reach the bottom of the stairs. "You know who I am, don't you?"

"Taehyung's sister," Jeongguk nods, forcing himself to smile despite how uncomfortable he is.

"No, I mean...you know about our dad and everything." Taeyeon says, tucking her hair behind her ear nervously as she looks up at him.

"Oh...w-well, yeah," He stammers. "I'm Taehyung's surrogate partner, so I have access to his files."

"Surrogate what?" Taeyeon asks.

"Like, uhm, his therapist. Y'know?" Jeongguk tries to explain. "Basically a therapist."

Taeyeon nods. "I've tried reaching out since our dad went to prison. He's been ignoring my phone calls and messages for five years now."

"I'm sure he's just processing everything still," Jeongguk says optimistically.

"He was so upset whenever my sister and I testified against our dad," Taeyeon says. "My mom got all in his head and made him think our dad was a good person. But a good person doesn't do those things to their kids...or any kid."

"I'm not really supposed to discuss Taehyung's case outside of a work environment." Jeongguk says. "I'm sorry."

"No, I'm sorry," Taeyeon says quickly, rolling her eyes at herself. "I don't know what I'm saying."

"You should get home before it gets too late," Jeongguk says smiling at her. "I'm sure Taehyung will be up to having a conversation tomorrow."

"Thanks for walking me down, it was nice meeting you." Taeyeon says bowing politely. "I'll go then."

Jeongguk bows in return before they go their separate ways. He sighs as he climbs into his car. He's never made a house call before, let alone make one outside of work.

He was going to tell Namjoon that it was against his contract to engage with patients outside of a professional environment. But when he heard how panicked he was and Taehyung's voice in the background he couldn't say no.

He knew he was playing a dangerous game by dancing around the legality of his contract, but in that moment—when Taehyung needed him—he couldn't stay away.

Even if he wanted to he couldn't.