You could see the excitement on the first year's faces, their eyes twinkling. It was a brand-new chapter in their life, expecting it to be filled with the best memories and adventures, a rollercoaster of emotions before the intimidating truth of real life comes their way.

Wasn't I supposed to feel this too?

I won't lie, part of me does.
But it was overshadowed by the amount of anxiety I was feeling. I didn't like change. It was hard for me to adjust to new situations, hard for me to make new friends, hard for me to fit in.

I wouldn't describe myself as particularly shy. I have a loud personality, usually quite happy with a huge smile on my face. Problem is, when I feel something I feel it at full blast.
Perhaps my reactions went a little overboard but at least they were genuine.
You could see a light in my eyes when I started talking about a topic I was passionate about. Maybe I was too loud? So what? No reason to knock other's down, right?

People often told me that I was too much, way too hyper, annoying, needy,... The list goes on and on.

So, for this year, I promised myself to dial it back. Not in a way that'd completely change me. I'm not interested in losing parts of me that define who I am. I'm going to be me but just at a lower volume. Does that even make sense?

I'm scared of making a fool out of myself and pushing everyone away. I don't wanna be the odd one out again who can't seem to make friendships last.

Man do I miss Hitoka-chan! I thought to myself while making my way to the classroom. Yachi Hitoka was my neighbour and childhood best friend. Our moms luckily were really close friends too, so we'd spent every free minute together. We went to the same schools, same classes. I wish she were here with me. I missed that blondie sooo much.

Hitoka was the kinda girl you didn't notice at first, but once you got to know her she bewitched you with that personality of hers. She was kind, thoughtful, more on the quieter side. We balanced each other out. She was always there for me, loving me the way I am. I was devastated when I found out she was leaving.

Hitoka and her parents moved to Miyagi this summer to be closer to her grandma, who is unfortunately struggling with breast cancer. It's not like we're never going to see each other again, but I can feel a part of me missing since she's gone.

She is supposed to attend Karasuno High School. Although change was never a problem for Hitoka, I'm still concerned about how she is coping with all that's happening. I hope she's settling in nicely. I have to call her when I get home.

The other first years seemed to struggle quite a lot finding their way into their designated classes since the building was huge, but I got there pretty easily. At least there was one upside to spending all those hours in these hallways. 

My brother took a lot of pride in going to school here and being on the volleyball team, so he showed me around a lot. When it was too cold to wait for him outside I waited in the building exploring the rooms and hallways to make time pass by faster.

I started walking into classroom 1-4 when someone suddenly bumped into me hard. My bag fell, its content spreading on the floor. I let out an annoyed sigh and bent down to gather my stuff, not wanting to interact with the idiot who can't seem to pay attention to his surroundings. Baka.

I felt his stare on me and decided to look up to find a pair of emerald green eyes gazing into mine. He was on the floor trying to get my attention. "Gomenasai, gomenasai! I'm so sorry, I didn't see you there" he apologized profusely. "Apparently, I'm as blind as a bat" he smirked, trying to get everything together and shoving it in my bag. I giggled at his remark. "It's fine, don't sweat it". I gave him a big smile and he returned it. "I'm Ashabi Sora, but please just call me Sora. I hate all those formalities" said the blond boy introducing himself and reaching out a hand. I shook his hand. "L/N Y/N. Since I feel so generous today, you may call me by my first name as well" I answered laughing.

Did I just make my first friend?