FIFTEEN. trouble in paradise
MEENA SAT at her desk as she edited her Youtube video. She'd been sitting there for what felt like hours as she went back and forth between her Discord chats with Foolish and Tina and her video on the right side of the screen.
Expect she wasn't truly feeling it. They wanted her to join this Minecraft tournament but her heart wasn't in it. She'd been feeling lost for the past couple of weeks and it was strange. She hadn't felt this way since dating Blau.
She quipped her lip to the side, her eyes slightly tinging with tears as she edited one of her vlogs from the past week. There was just something about this dating this she was quite used to just yet.
Meena heavily sighed, taking the final bits of her vlog and editing it as quickly and precisely as she could before she closed her editing application and giving her final no to Foolish and Tina before uploading the video to YouTube and cutting her PC.
Meena turned her chair, her phone in her hands and her reflection staring back at her.
The texts were shorter, the calls fewer. He wasn't avoiding her outright, but he wasn't reaching out the same way either.
And the worst part?
She didn't know why.
Her fingers hovered over her screen, debating if she should text him—if she should ask what was going on. But the fear of his response, or worse, no response at all, kept her frozen.
This was the exact feeling she had with her ex. That creeping uncertainty, the slow unraveling of something she wasn't even sure was real anymore.
Blau wasn't like him.
He wasn't.
But then why did she feel like this?
She swallowed thickly and opened her messages, scrolling past his name and tapping on QT's instead.
meena
hey qt
qt
what's wrong baby?
meena
i think blau is mad at me but he hasn't said anything to me about it
qt
what gives you that impression?
meena
he just seems off like every time we're out or just with each other idk
meena
like i feel really bad
qt
you cannot compare this to malik
qt
he was a piece of shit you know that
qt
nothing like blau
qt
i'm coming over
READ AT 5:45 P.M.
THERE WAS no way Meena could tell QT no... it was hard for her to tell any of her friends and family no. It wasn't like she didn't want to see QT but she knew QT was going to give it to her straight whether or not she wanted to hear it.
It didn't take long for QT to come over and gently knock on Meena's bedroom and come inside. She sat down on Meena's bed with girl, her blonde hair wrapped in a messy bun and what looked like cake batter splattered over her sweater.
"Talk to me," she said, voice softer than usual.
Meena let out a heavy breath, her fingers absentmindedly picking at the hem of her hoodie. "I don't even know where to start."
QT tilted her head, watching her closely. "Start with Blau."
Meena swallowed. "Something feels off."
QT nodded, waiting.
"He's not ignoring me, but he's... distant. And I don't know why. I keep trying to tell myself I'm overthinking it, but I don't know anymore."
QT let out a small sigh. "Have you asked him about it?"
Meena let out a humorless laugh. "No."
QT gave her a pointed look. "Meena."
"I know," she snapped, her voice cracking. "But what if I ask and he tells me I'm right? What if he is pulling away? What if I already lost him, and I just didn't see it coming?"
QT's expression softened. "Meena—"
"I hate this," Meena cut in, her voice breaking entirely. "I hate that I feel like this. I hate that Malik still has this much power over me, even now. Even when I should be happy."
Her chest heaved as the tears finally spilled over, her hands curling into fists in her lap. "I am happy, QT. Blau is amazing. He's kind, he's patient, he cares—but I can't stop waiting for the moment he decides I'm too much."
QT pulled her in without hesitation, wrapping her arms tightly around her. Meena buried her face into QT's shoulder.
"You're not too much," QT murmured, running a soothing hand down her back. "And Blau's not Malik."
"I know," Meena whispered, her voice barely audible. "But it still feels the same."
QT pulled back slightly, hands on Meena's shoulders as she met her gaze. "That's because your brain is making connections where there aren't any. You were hurt, Meena. Badly. And now, even when things are good, your mind is telling you to prepare for the worst."
Meena swallowed hard. "So what do I do?"
QT sighed. "You talk to him."
Meena let out another broken laugh. "And what if everything changes?"
QT squeezed her hands. "And what if it doesn't?"
Meena sniffed, her lips pressing together.
QT smiled softly. "Blau adores you, Meena. I don't think he even knows how to be mad at you."
Meena wiped at her face, exhaling. "I hate feeling like this."
"I know," QT said. "But you're not alone in it."
Meena nodded, her fingers still trembling as she grabbed a tissue from her nightstand. She took a deep breath, trying to steady herself.
She was grateful for QT, she really was. She would pick up her phone, texting Blau and asking if she could come over with QT peering over herself to make sure she actually did it.
He responded a minute later saying sure and that the door would be unlocked when she came.
She wanted to prepare for the worst, but that would only make things worst for her.
She let out a short breath and grabbed a pair of shoes. QT followed behind her, giving her a reassuring hug before taking off on her own. And for a moment, Meena stood there before getting in her car and making her way over to his.
And once there, she just sat there. She had been sitting there for at least five minutes, willing herself to just move, to get out, to go talk to him. But the words she needed to say felt too big, too tangled in the back of her throat.
With a sharp inhale, she grabbed her phone, shot QT a quick text that just read I'm going in, then opened the door.
The air was crisp, the evening chill nipping at her skin as she made her way up to his door. Just as he said, it was unlocked. She stepped inside, closing it gently behind her.
Blau was sitting on the couch, scrolling through his phone, but when he saw her, he immediately stood up, his brows pulling together.
"Hey," he said, his voice laced with surprise.
Meena nodded, taking a few cautious steps forward. "Hey."
For a moment, neither of them spoke. The air between them felt thick, weighted with all the unsaid things hanging between them.
Blau was the first to break the silence. "Everything okay?"
Meena let out a humorless chuckle, rubbing her arms. "I don't know. You tell me."
He frowned, shifting slightly like he already knew where this was going but wasn't sure how to stop it.
"I just need to know what's going on with us. Because I feel like... I feel like you're slipping away from me."
Blau exhaled, running a hand through his hair. "Meena, I—"
She continued, cutting him off. "I don't want to make this a bigger deal than it is, but I've been here before. With my ex." She paused, her voice barely above a whisper. "And it scares me, Nathan. Because I know you're not him, I know that. But when you started acting distant, when you started pulling away without telling me why... it made me feel like I was right back in that place again. I spent years in a relationship where I constantly felt like I was the problem," she continued, her voice shaking now. "Where I felt like if I just did one thing differently, maybe he would love me more. Maybe he wouldn't treat me like an afterthought. And I refuse to feel like that again."
Blau's expression shifted, something pained flashing in his eyes. "You aren't the problem," he said firmly. "God, Meena, this is the last thing I wanted to make you feel."
She let out a shaky breath, crossing her arms. "Then tell me what's going on. Because I can't do this thing where I sit around wondering if I did something wrong. If you're mad at me, if you want to be with me."
Blau let out a breath, shaking his head. "I'm not mad at you. And of course, I want to be with you. That's never been a question."
"Then what is it?" She pressed.
There was a pause. He hesitated, but only for a second, before finally admitting, "I was jealous."
Meena blinked, her brows knitting together. "What?"
Blau exhaled. "Of Tarik."
She stared at him, completely caught off guard. "Tarik?"
"Yeah." His voice was flat, almost embarrassed. "I know it's stupid, okay? I know you and Tarik are just friends, but watching you two together, seeing how comfortable you were—it got in my head. And instead of talking to you about it like a normal person, I just... I don't know, I let it fester."
Meena just looked at him, trying to wrap her head around the fact that all of this, all of the distance, the uncertainty, had come from that.
"Nathan," she said slowly. "Tarik is like a brother to me. That's like... saying you were jealous of Noah." She sniffled.
"I know," he admitted, his face twisting with frustration—though it wasn't directed at her. "Trust me, I know that. But I still let it eat at me. And instead of dealing with it, I pulled away like an idiot."
Meena exhaled, rubbing at her temples. "Why didn't you just tell me?"
Blau sighed, looking down at his hands. "Because it wasn't your problem, Meena. It was mine. And I was trying to figure it out on my own so I wouldn't make you feel like this. But I ended up doing the exact thing I was trying to avoid."
Meena swallowed hard, blinking quickly when she felt the sting of tears behind her eyes. She wasn't crying because she was sad—at least, not exactly. It was just a lot. A lot of emotions, a lot of weight she had been carrying, and now, it was finally spilling out.
Blau noticed immediately. He reached for her, gently pulling her forward until she was standing between his legs, his hands resting on her waist. "Hey," he murmured. "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to make you feel like that. This was all on me."
Meena let out a shaky breath, closing her eyes for a second. "I just wanted to know," she whispered. "That's all I wanted. I don't care if it's something stupid—I just want you to tell me instead of making me guess."
Blau nodded, his thumbs brushing soothing circles against her waist. "I hear you. And I swear, from now on, I won't shut you out like that again."
She studied his face for a moment, searching for any hesitation. But there was none. Just sincerity.
She exhaled, nodding. "Okay."
Blau smiled softly before leaning up, pressing a lingering kiss to her temple. "We're okay?"
Meena huffed a small laugh, rolling her eyes. "Yeah, Nathan. We're okay."
Blau grinned, tugging her down onto the couch beside him, his arms still loosely wrapped around her. "Good. Because I really like you, and I don't plan on screwing this up again."
Liked by maryjanebrooks and others
shushpatel he's so STUPIF
View all 15 comments
blaustoise IM SORRY IM SORRY
↳ shushpatel apologize with flowers
lunahayes queen never cry
↳ foolish_gamers can someone tell me what this means
valkyrae WHAT DID HE DO
↳ valkyrae meena i swear to god ill kill him
qtcinderella i love you and soso proud of you
↳ shushpatel thank you so much i love you more <33
— lucy has something to say !!
i said this story was gonna have twenty chapters and now that we're close im so sad :(
anyway tarik is so hot i could cry
i know qt's real name but idk if she's comfortable with people using it or not so like im not but qt is just qt and i love her #livelaughloveqtcinderella!!!
bye :))))
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