This is the last chapter! Maraming salamat sa mga sumubaybay!╥﹏╥

***

Her

Iniwan nila ako. It turns out, he was waiting for her, not the bus.

For her.

He waited.

I envy her.

Matamlay ako habang naglalakad pabalik sa bahay namin ngunit natigilan ako nang may makitang pamilyar na lalake sa malayo. My eyes widened as I try to contemplate whether to fight or flight.

Tatalikuran ko na sana siya para makatakbo-

"Arabelle." Aston called, my feet froze on the ground.

Malakas ang kalabog ng puso ko. Alam kong galit siya sa akin dahil trinaydor ko siya. He was quiet for years! Bakit ngayon siya nagpakita? Bakit ngayon sila biglaang nagpakita?!

"Nakalabas ako sa kulungan kahapon lang." Aniya kaya mas lalo akong nanlamig.

He was imprisoned?

"At ikaw ang una kong pinuntahan." Dagdag niya.

Hindi ako nakagalaw. Maybe because his voice reminded me a lot of my past? I just know that everything in me stopped. Nawalan ako ng lakas, ni hindi ko magawang itaas ang kamay ko dahil sa takot na baka magpaputok siya ng bala.

"You know . . . even when Cara pretended to be you. I still chose you."

My eyes widened at that. Wala akong nagawa nang pumunta siya sa harapan ko. My lips quivered in fear when I met his eyes. Kulay abong mga mata.

And then I realize something . . .

Siya ang lalaking tinutukoy ni Cara na may kulay-abong mga mata sa unang pahina ng diary niya!

"Noong una, naniwala akong siya ikaw pero kalaunan, napagtanto kong hindi siya si Arabelle."

Kaya ba . . . kaya ba tumakas si Cara? Did she . . . fell love at first sight when she met him?

"Alam mo kailan ko 'yon napagtanto?" He asked with a smile.

Hindi ako nakapagsalita. My eyes roamed around and I realized I was alone in this quiet street. The street lamp was on but there were no nearby houses. Malayo ako sa mga tao, malabong may taong maglalakad ng ganitong oras sa gabi and all I could hope was that a vehicle would stop by in this street.

"Noong nakita ko ang katawan niya. When she was bare and naked, I saw all the unfamiliar scars. I knew it wasn't you. I've seen how flawless your skin was. You didn't have bruises in your arms and feet. Or cuts on your wrist."

Nanlaki ang mata ko dahil doon.

"And she wasn't a virgin! Ikaw, alam kong virgin ka dahil walang lalakeng umaaligid sa iyo!" He smirked.

Doon ako nagkaroon ng lakas. My palms pulsated when it hit his hard face. Sa sobrang lakas noon ay nag-iwan ito ng bakas sa mukha niya. Pakiramdam ko nabali ang kamay ko, pero ayos lang dahil mukhang nabali ang leeg niya.

"Tangina mo." I spat and turned my back on him.

Aalis na sana ako, gusto ko nang tumakbo pero natigilan ako nang mahigpit niyang hinawakan ang braso ko.

"Aston!" Banta ko.

"Did you know? Your crazy twin fucking manipulated my sister to take her own life!" He spat as he pulled my arms roughly.

"Pakawalan mo ako! Makukulong ka ulit kung hindi mo ako papakawalan!" Banta ko kahit na ramdam ko ang panginginig ng buong sistema ko.

"Hindi! Papatayin kita bago ako makulong ulit!"

I paled when I saw him getting a knife out of his pocket.

"As-"

A bang made everything stop.

Nawalan ng lakas ang kapit sa akin ni Aston kasabay ng paghulog niya sa sahig dahil sa balang tumama sa braso niya. Another bang made him groan in pain. And another.

"Tangina! Ang sakit!" Sigaw niya sa kawalan.

Nag-angat ako ng tingin at tumama ito sa malamig na kulay asul na mga mata.

She looked dangerous. Far from the warm woman I met earlier. She shot another trigger on his legs that I flinched.

Another shot.

Another shout.

"Stop it, Ci."

My heart drummed loud against my chest when I heard that familiar voice. Lumampas ang tingin ko sa babae at nakita ko si Adam sa likod niya. Standing nonchalantly behind her as if he didn't care Aston almost killed me.

He looked at him coldly. And his eyes went up to me, he gave me an indifferent stare as his eyes roamed around my body.

"Report it to the police." He said coldly. He was talking to me!

"A-"

"Let's go, Ci." Aniya sa babae dahil mukhang hindi pa tapos magpaputok ng bala ito.

Hindi nakinig ang babae at nagpaputok muli ng bala sa tabi kung nasaan si Aston. It was close to his hands but it didn't shoot his hands, it was as if she was warning him and she succeeded because Aston cried in fear.

Tuluyan na siyang hinila ng lalake para makaalis sila. My lips parted as I stare at their backs. Iiwan nila ako? Iiwan . . . niya ako? Mag-isa? Rito? Sa kalsada na walang tao? Kasama ang lalakeng kinatatakutan ko?

"A-Adam!"

Parehas silang natigilan sa tawag ko. I bit my lower lip as they slowly turned to me. The girl- Ci? Looked at me with a tilted head while Adam looked indifferent.

"N-Natatakot ako . . ." That was the truth, the trauma kicked in when Aston held my hand and up until now, I can feel my hands shaking.

Paano kung puntahan ako ni Fou? Paano kung sugurin ako ng mga kakilala ni Aston? Paano kung gawin nila sa bahay ko ang ginawa nila sa bahay ni Adam? Paano kung may bumaril sa akin?

"N-Natatakot ako . . ." Ulit ko dahil baka hindi niya ako narinig.

Binitiwan niya si Ci. My heart escalated from the hope that rose but it quickly descended the moment he opened his mouth.

"Escort her, Ci." Aniya at humakbang papalapit sa akin.

My lips parted as he walked near me. I was about to say a word when he passed by me.

"Saan ko siya dadalhin?" Her voice was as cold as ice, I almost didn't recognize her from the girl I met earlier.

"Kung saan siya hindi natatakot."

"Saan nga?" Iritadong tanong ng babae.

I clenched my fist. Mukhang napipilitan lang naman sila.

"A-Aalis nalang ako." Sabi ko at kahit na nanginginig pa ang paa ko ay pinilit kong maglakad papalayo.

Siguro . . . ligtas naman na ako?

Pero natatakot pa rin ako.

"Sa bahay ko."

Natigilan ako sa paglalakad nang magsalita si Adam sa likod ko.

"Sigurado ka bang hindi siya natatakot sa bahay mo?" Sarkastikong usal ng babae.

"Sa bahay ko, Ci." Ulit nito.

"Fine." She groaned and I heard her footsteps near me.

My lips parted when I met her cold blue eyes.

"Let's go."

Tahimik ko siyang sinundan. Hindi siya nagsalita hanggang sa tumigil kami sa isang pickup truck. Nagulat ako nang pinakbuksan niya ako ng pinto sa passenger's seat. She motioned me to go in so I went in as I gulp. Hindi kalaunan ay pumasok na siya sa sasakyan at pinaandar ito.

She was quiet while she was driving as I fidget on my sit.

"Ayos lang ba sa 'yo?" Hindi ko napigilang tanong.

"Tsk. May magagawa ba ako?" Walang emosyon niyang sabi, nasa kalsada ang tingin habang nagmamaneho.

"Pero b-boyfried mo siya? May karapatan ka." Nag-iwas ako ng tingin at itinuon ang atensyon sa labas.

"May type ako."

Nanlaki ang mata ko at binalingan siya. Humalakhak siya dahil sa reaksyon ko.

I feel offended.

"I mean, I don't like dominant men." She smirked.

"So . . . hindi mo siya boyfriend?" Tumaas ng kaunti ang boses ko.

Bakit nila ako pinaniwala?!

Sumulyap siya sa direksyon ko pero hindi siya nagsalita. My lips parted to utter a word but the car stopped.

"Labas na." Aniya at sinenyas ang labas. Napabaling ako sa labas at nakita ang pamilyar na bahay.

My lips parted. It has the same architecture as his previous house! The same color, the same vibe, everything felt like a copycat!

Bumukas ang pinto kaya nagulat ako dahil hindi ko namalayang lumabas na pala ang babae para pagbuksan ako ng pinto. I went out and gaped at the mansion for the second time. Nakarinig ako ng kalabog ng pinto ng sasakyan kaya bumaling ako sa likod. Nasa loob na siya ng driver's seat. Akala ko papaandarin niya na ang sasakyan pero ibinaba niya ang bintana ng passenger's seat.

"Sa bahay nga, hindi siya makamove-on, sa 'yo pa kaya?" Aniya kaya nanlaki ang mata ko.

Ngumisi lang siya sa akin bago niya itinaas muli ang bintana. The car moved but I remain frozen on the ground as I watch it disappear on my line of vision.

"Bakit hindi ka pa pumasok?"

I jolted when I heard a familiar voice. Nilingon ko siya at nakitang nakakunot ang noo niya sa akin.

"S-Sorry." Hindi ko alam saan ako humihingi ng patawad.

Hindi siya nagsalita at pumasok na sa loob. I gulped and followed his footsteps inside. Malaki ang gate pero hindi na siya kasingtaas ng gate sa bahay niya sa Casa Cantatio. There was a familiar statue when we entered his territory and the detail was immaculate.

"Anong ginagawa mo diyan?"

Doon ko lang napagtanto na natigilan na pala ako para pagmasdan ang statue. I panicked and tried to run but fuck it, I didn't notice there was a mad on the ground that I slipped!

"Ugh . . ." I groaned in pain when my butt hit the ground.

I heard his loud sigh. I cursed myself.

Tatayo na sana ako pero napaigik ako nang biglaan akong lumutang sa ere. My eyes widened when his arms were wrapped around me despite my body full of mud.

"Diosmio! Bakit ang dumi-dumi niya!"

My heart thumped loud when I heard a familiar tone, a familiar voice.

Inilapag ako ni Adam sa isang couch, sa tapat ng apoy- it was a familiar fire place.

Bumaling ako kay Mrs. Potty at nakita ko ang pamilyar na nag-aalala niyang mukha. She has wrinkles on her face and she looked older than the last time I saw her. I teared up.

"Hija-" Niyakap ko siya nang lumapit siya sa akin, naramdaman kong napatigil siya.

"S-Sorry." Bulong ko, dahil alam kong iniwan ko sila. Hindi ako nagpaalam sa kanila.

Hindi siya nagsalita kaya kumalas ako sa pagkakayakap, kinakabahan dahil baka ako lang ang naka-miss sa kanila. But when I saw her tears, I knew we both feel the same way.

"Tama na ang dramahan. Maligo ka muna."

Natigilan ako nang biglang bumara si Adam. I glared at him but he looked at me indifferently.

"O-Oo, hija! Maligo ka muna!" Tumawa si Mrs. Potty kaya napabuntong-hininga ako.

Adam walked out kaya napatayo ako para sundan siya. Nilingon ko si Mrs. Potty na nakangiti sa akin habang sumisinghot kaya ningitian ko siya at ibinalik ang atensyon sa harap kung nasaan si Adam.

He entered his room so I stopped in front of his door. He turned to me and his eyes were the same- cold.

"Ano pang hinihintay mo? Pumasok ka." Masungit niyang sabi.

I bit my lower lip as I slowly step in. He locked the door behind me and I held my breath because we were inches away. Nanatili ang kamay niya sa door knob and I was stuck because his body was blocking the way.

"A-"

He cut me off with a sudden kiss I was not prepared of. My eyes shut automatically as his lips parted mine, his kiss was dominant and wild as if he was searching for something and I held his shirt tight, suddenly feeling those familiar rhythm and nostalgic beat.

Tumigil siya kaya hinihingal kong binuksan ang mga mata. His lips was red and his neck was flushed. His eyes were warm and it felt like I was back in the arms of the Adam I used to love- still love.

"Maligo ka na." Aniya at tinalikuran ako.

Hindi ako nakagalaw dahil sa panghihina.

Nakagalaw nalang siguro ako nang pumasok siya sa closet room. I sighed and slapped myself before proceeding to the bathroom.

Naligo ako ng ilang minuto hanggang sa natapos ako at doon ko lang napagtanto na wala pala akong damit! Walang bathrobe!

Tumingin ako sa salamin na nakapulupot sa akin ang tuwalya. And then I realize something . . . there's a mirror! May salamin! Walang salamin dati pero ngayon ay mayroon na!

I slowly opened the door and peeked outside. Nakita ko si Adam na nakaupo sa kama at nagbabasa ng diyaryo. I gulped when I saw him wearing specs. Napanganga pa ako dahil doon. He looked handsome!

"Stop staring, Beauty. I might assume you like me."

I do!

"W-Wala akong damit." Mahina kong sabi.

Tumigil siya sa pagbabasa at nilingon ako. Itinago ko ang katawan sa pintuan dahil nakakahiya. Hindi siya nagsalita at tumayo na para kuhain ang damit na nasa nightstand. He silently gave it to me and I fought the urge to drool over his handsome face with specs on.

Nang makalapit siya ay doon ko napansin ang malaking tattoo sa braso niya. He was wearing a sando and the tattoo on his arms were tinted with rose. I know that part. I remember that part really well.

It was the shot I made to calm my loud thoughts.

"Natameme ka."

Kaagad kong hinablot ang damit sa kaniya at sinarado ang pinto. Malakas ang kalabog ng puso ko at alam kong bumabalik nanaman itong nararamdaman kong pagkadismaya sa sarili.

It's not your fault, Arabelle.

Natuto ka. Iyon ang mahalaga.

I calmed and comforted myself for long, I didn't keep track of time. Kaya paglabas ko, nadatnan ko siyang nakaupo sa isang silya at nakapikit. His breathing was deep and my lips parted when I realized something.

He doesn't sleep on bed, again.

Because of me.

I lost his trust.

Dahan-dahan ko siyang nilapitan and I was in awe as I stare at his handsome face. The scar was still there and it highlighted his features more. Bumaba ang mata ko sa brasong niyang may tinta, it has a scar in there if you'll observe it closely, and it's because of me. The tint didn't completely cover the scar.

I was staring at him when my eyes accidentally saw something on his table.

Beauty and the Beast.

It was my book! Nagbabasa siya?

Dahan-dahan kong nilapitan ang libro at nakumpirma ko ngang nagbabasa siya dahil sa bookmark na nakita ko. Nahagip ng mata ko ang isang notebook sa tabi nito. My lips parted when I opened it.

For my unsaid thoughts.

I'm writing this because I like copying my Beauty's way of writing.

This shit is for girls but I'm doing this anyway.

I miss her.

But I feel like I'll lose myself again if I go back to her.

I want to run to her.

But I feel like I'll crash again.

She killed me several times. Not just literally.

And I want to live.

So I could witness her grow.

So I could see myself grow.

Maybe I'll settle for admiring her from afar.

Because I want to save my wounded heart.

I closed the notebook as I could feel myself crashing.

I ruined him.

Nilingon ko siya na nanatiling nakapikit at natutulog sa silya. I bit my lower lip as I stare at him.

He looks okay. He looks happy. He looks in peace. He doesn't need me. He doesn't need a beast like me.

His soul was pure. His heart was beautiful, and a beast like me shouldn't have stabbed a knife in his already ruined heart.

Kahit na nanghihina ay humakbang ako palabas sa kuwarto niya. Pakiramdam ko kung mananatili ako ay baka magbago pa ang isip ko.

I realize I was selfish for wanting to own him again despite ruining him completely. He doesn't need to be with me, I'm a beast, a heartless monster who added trauma to his already dark past.

Maybe beauty is really not meant to be with the beast.

🥀