friendship: a vent

friendship

noun

the emotions or conduct of friends; the state of being friends.
a relationship between friends.
plural noun: friendships
"she formed close friendships with women"
synonyms: a relationship, friendly relationship, close relationship, attachment, mutual attachment, alliance, association, close association, bond, tie, link, union; More

There is something about starting a friendship that scares me. Maybe it is the fact that I am terrified that I will scare a person away with the collateral damage that I carry. I don't really like opening myself up to people but sometimes I have to. All I can truly think about, during that time, is if I'm saying too much or if I am annoying. I wish I knew when to stop too, to know when is enough. I don't like to overshare in real life, here it is something different. Here, I can write something and have people read it. Here, I know some feel the same as I do. Making friendships in real life though? It is difficult because anything can happen. It can go really good or horribly wrong within seconds if you say something wrong.  I know that I have some good friendships. I just cannot help but overthink about it. It is in my nature to overthink about situations.

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