Underachievers

MONDAY OCTOBER 6

"Who the hell's that?" Justin asked, squinting at the gates to Vamp Towers as Kyle roared in on the Kawasaki on Monday morning. I'd forgotten to mention my new form of transport to the Argist Academy.

The bus pulled up at the same time, discharging a grumpy guard who thumped his baton in his palm. Justin, Shayla and the others moved to the back, waiting for him to open the doors.

"Kyle," I replied. "Who's doing his best to whole-heartedly embrace masculine stereotypes."

Justin pressed his lips together and side-eyed me. "That's what you think he's doing?"

"God, yeah. Anyway, I hope you hear from the chancellor today about the cooking challenge."

Online, plenty of people had seen the challenge Aaron Eats had thrown out and wanted the competition to take place, but my channel had also been trolled by those all too ready to say what they thought of uppity vampires who dared dream of doing something so public.

Justin nodded and leant in to kiss me—surprising me by turning it into a full-on snog that made me squirm, as we normally saved that stuff for behind Vamp Towers' closed doors.

Shayla cleared her throat as the grumpy guard growled in objection. Along with expressing their opinions on Justin and his cookery skills, the trolls lined up to tell me how nauseating they found the idea of physical contact with vampires. The friendly comments on my channel far outweighed the nasty ones—one hundred and fifty or so for every vile remark—but guess which ones replayed on a loop in my head?

We broke apart. The grumpy guard opened the back door to the bus and whacked it with his baton. "Move!"

I marched up to the door and made a show of looking in. The seats in there still had chains and neck braces. So much for my petition. I got my phone out and took a photo.

"Hey!" The guard swiped at me, trying to grab it. "You're not allowed to take photos!"

"Since when? The minute I put this up online, everyone will pile in. Get the Vampire Security wankers hashtag trending. Again. Your bosses will come down on you like a tonne of bricks because you should have—"

Justin grasped my hand. "Maya," he murmured, the words quiet enough not to be overheard. "I appreciate the effort, but if you make too much trouble, they won't let me do that cooking competition out of spite."

He was right. I deleted the photo, flashing my phone back at the grumpy guard to prove it, who smirked at me. I bit back the instinctive smartarse response. A fight for another day.

"Don't sit too close to Kyle on that bike, will you?" Justin whispered. "Especially not now that I've warmed you up."

Justin sometimes delivered lines that made it difficult to gauge how serious he was. I kissed the tip of his nose. "Of course not! See you later." Then, as the grumpy guard screwed his face up in disgust, I added, "Can't wait, big boy!"

Loaded up with its vampire 'prisoners,' the bus drove off. I headed for Kyle, who was scuffing the ground with his feet.

"Did you see that?" I asked, pointing behind me.

"What, that in-your-face public display of affection?" Kyle handed me a helmet. After he'd asked me out months ago, and I'd turned him down, we'd slipped back into that brother-sister bickering thing, though as was the case with Justin, there were times when Kyle's remarks sounded jokey, and at others, the digs too pointed.

"No! The chains inside the buses yet again."

He shrugged. "It'll be a temporary thing for a few weeks. Longer, though, if you keep riling them up."

I gave him a cross-eyed glare that made him laugh. Today's biker gear looked fresh out of the factory. Leathers so fresh I could almost smell cow. Skin-tight too, the trousers moulded to thick quads, encapsulating a sizeable—

Sizeable? Do not look at that bit.

"Am I driving?" I asked as I fastened the helmet's strap under my chin.

Kyle shook his head. "No, because I'm a law-abiding citizen who's in no hurry to be pulled up for enabling an unlicensed, shit driver."

I grumbled, but he refused to change his mind. As I swung one leg up and over behind him on the Kawasaki, Justin's semi-serious order 'not after I've warmed you up' made me wriggle away so we weren't too close together. Kyle's left hand and foot hit the clutch and gears and we roared off. The bike sped past the guards at the barrier and onto the main road.

At the Academy, I made my way to the main hall. Part communal gathering area, part canteen, most people congregated there pre and post lessons. Low-slung green upholstered sofas, coffee tables and various food pop-ups, the one selling bacon rolls and Danish pastries queued out the door, filled the space there. A large poster on the wall advertised a rally by the Liberal Life Party on the sixteenth of December, encouraging everyone in favour of change in Dunrovia to attend.

I headed for the coffee pop-up. The pop-up's owner handed over my usual—a black coffee with sugar. Kyle, his leather gear exchanged for his normal chinos and Argist Academy black hoodie with its red and black logo, plucked it from my hands.

"Hey!"

"Payment for your ride here."

He helped himself to another two sachets of sugar and emptied them in. Kyle had this ability to mainline caffeine and sugar with zero effect on his skin or weight. He had an asbestos tongue too, gulping down boiling hot coffee as if it were water.

A small group had gathered around the large TV mounted on the back wall, pointing at the screen and beckoning others to join them. Someone turned the volume up and the announcer intoned, "There now follows a party political broadcast by Dunrovia's government, the National Conservative Party."

"This will be a laugh," I said, walking over to join those gathered around the TV. "How on earth are they going to pretend they're any good at running the country?"

Kyle shrugged as he lobbed the empty coffee cup in the recycling bin. "Lies, lies and more damned lies?"

The film started. The National Conservatives had chosen their best-looking politicians and party members who all stared earnestly at the camera.

"There's only one party that can keep you and your children safe," Alena, 31, promised, her arm around a fearful little girl. "Because if you don't vote for us..."

Behind her, the background changed to location views of Dunrovia that filled with blood. People, wide-eyed in terror, charging down streets and roads, the sky behind them filling with vampires. Teeth, dark eyes, ones that flew and pounced, grabbing those fleeing.

As one particularly ghoulish vampire with a set of teeth far larger than I'd ever seen on any of the ones I'd met swooped in for a kill, the screen turned black.

Sir Andrew Soames, the National Conservatives leader and the embodiment of male, pale and stale, addressed the camera. "We will do everything to ensure Vampire Security services are fit for purpose, and that the laws of this country benefit you, not vampires. Do the right thing. Vote for the National Conservatives in May next year."

The film ended with an infographic of the Conservatives' achievements, including a decrease in the number of attacks by unlicensed vampires. Everyone booed. No-one here had voted for our ruling party.

"Those figures are wrong," Kyle said, gesturing towards the screen. "Attacks by unlicensed vampires have increased fifty percent in the past two years, and the average number of households with unvaccinated children has shot up too because they privatised healthcare."

"But that's so wrong. How do they get away with—"

Before I could say anything else, mobile phones all around us pinged. My phone joined in too, startling me. Sharon's name flashed on the screen.

"Where are you?" She sounded frantic.

"At the Academy. What's the matter?" I'd popped by yesterday afternoon, and everything had been okay, apart from Rosie being off-colour.

"Leonie says her neighbour three doors down spotted vampires hanging around here. A lot of them."

As I'd spent so many years caring for Rosie, my heart almost always leapt to my throat whenever a vampire emergency reared its ugly head. Rosie's full immunity wouldn't kick in until October the twenty-fifth. I counted the days on my fingers. Nineteen to go.

"There's been no attacks around here for ages," Sharon fretted. "And they choose now to make an appearance. Bastards. No sign of Vampire Security either."

The other students in the canteen must have got the same message. Like me, they would have unvaccinated siblings, perhaps living on the Garshake Estate. Anxious conversations took place where they urged their relatives to barricade themselves indoors. At the doors to the canteen, I spotted Nell conferring with Gregor and several other senior Argists.

"The Argists will send agents," I told Sharon, adding that she should lock all the doors and windows. Stupid advice, as that would have been the first thing she did after Leonie called her.

Kyle pushed himself to his feet. "I'm going with them. Don't worry. Rosie will be fine."

He jogged over to join Nell and Gregor, who were issuing instructions. The group dispersed seconds later, Kyle saying he would follow on Gregor's motorbike. I watched as he ran off. Nell, Gregor and the others wouldn't allow me to come with them, but I could persuade Kyle to let me hop on the back of the bike. After last Friday's vampire escape, I didn't plan to hang around here again, worrying about my sister.

AUTHOR'S NOTE - this is a new and revised version of this story that I originally posted on here November 2020 

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