Why does Love hurt?
Author's Note: Hello Lads and Ladies
Edited by: SuperAverageFoxyboy, The Dude who likes Tanks
Enjoy!
-Portal
Carol could hardly keep up the appearance of emotional stability. Looking down the barrel of any gun would rattle any ordinary person that never much had to squabble with the irrefutableness of death. Most herbivores of average standing knew, but Carol had grown up in the mansion of her parents, in a building well over hundreds of years old, having weathered many many generations of Japanese culture.
When Yahya and Mcmillan called her to the latter's office, she knew what request would come next, yet still in her mind she pictured the bodies of Dr. Zoyechka and Dr. Ludwig. Animals she never got along with, animals that never would look the same way as her partner. Yet still animals that had families and animals that deserved to learn and learn to be better.
She noted that Sublime Beastar didn't talk much if at all and that he was wearing a ton of makeup. They had toned his fur darker to try to hide the pale skin beneath, but it was too strong to look natural, turning his cheeks into black holes that swallowed light much like the Sublime Beastar himself swallowed the light from the lives of many hybrids alike.
"Are you willing to be a temporary lead while the police continue the thorough search for Dr. Taishiro?"
They might as well have been asking at gunpoint, the choice she ranged from was either a clean conscience paired with Professional Ruin and contributing to whatever horror raged in that laboratory block outside of the city. She knew what the project's end goal was. She had read the general documentation and the progress reports. She knew that she was working on weaponry meant to target multi-species individuals.
She knew that she had enough.
Yet now she felt herself look into the belly of the beast and wonder if being at the helm held the indirect draw that she might have the ability to directly hinder where it counted most.
She began to think of the whole ordeal on a timeline and then felt an uncertainty arise in her mind. How much longer did they have? How much longer until either Melon gave up or the Sublime Beastar terminated the research project? Would they instead just tear each other to pieces before reaching that endpoint?
Was she forced to play the hero that this city didn't deserve?
"Yes, Sir." She had taken way too long of a pause to think about it, but she still thought that neither of them would care much. Consent was not of importance in this business, they had quotas to meet with an invisible deadline that if they missed meant that the entire city was suddenly an even bigger shit show than it had prior been.
"Good, your documents will be supplied to your workstations at the Sinyala Facility.
New researchers are bound to arrive soon. Your personal security is now up to 4 officers while in the workplace and your new panic button right here."
The device was a small remote with a single button in its center
"Best placed with the clip on the back on some part of your clothing where it will not immediately be seen."
"The operative who saved me, where is he?" The only question she allowed herself as she felt it was warranted to ask. Her savior did deserve her personal thanks.
"Beastar Legosi has not reported for duty this morning, we suspect he's gone AWOL if he can't locate him." The only words out of Sublime Beastar's mouth were ones of bleak nature. Carol could hardly think that that Wolf would decide to suddenly stop fighting for his country after he had done something so heroic. It seemed much more apt that foul play was involved.
"What if he was kidnapped? I don't think someone who did something that heroic would just disappear.
The sublime Beastar furrowed his brow.
"We are looking into it." And that was that. If she pushed further she wouldn't get any closer to the truth.
"That concludes the meeting then. I hope you'll make good progress in the new lab."
"Thank you, sir." She shook Mcmillan's hand and turned around to leave the office. Neither the Sublime Beastar nor the science director had the courtesy to even wait for her to leave before continuing.
"Now, Sublime Beastar sir, when does the new legislative kick into effect."
"Monday next week." Came the gruff reply.
The door closed and Carol made a mental note. Today was Thursday, they had less than three days until the new legislation rolled around to completely upheave the current factor of normal.
It still coursed through her mind even as she took off her lab coat and placed it on a wire coat hanger in her locker. She went to the general supply and received a clothing cover, her transfer number, and new office location written on a neat white tag on the back of the black bag. She went back to her locker and maneuvered her coat into the back slipping the coat hanger hook through the hole at the top of the cover and sipping it shut. Her lab coat and other parts of official clothing were now in the black bag, held up by the coat hanger, of which only the hook was exposed from the top. She cleared out the rest of the items in the locker, placing them all into her handbag.
She didn't have much here, nor had she any reason to.
She left the Research facility, glad to smell the forest around her. Coincidentally the current research center was built when the Sublime Beastar was tackling cancer research. That had still been the goal when Carol applied for the position, only to find a few months after transferring that the agenda changed radically.
"Dr. Carol!" She heard a male voice shout after her while she was on the way to her car halfway over the parking lot, footsteps approaching in a fast walk.
She turned around, seeing a cheetah dressed in a policeman's uniform, the markings of the uniform inferred some elevated rank.
"Dr. Carol, good to catch you here. Lieutenant Strightman at your service." He extended his hand and smiled warmly. She grabbed his hand with a little hesitation, the surprise being the main factor.
"I just wanted to introduce myself first. Due to Chief Max still being missing, I'll be taking over the spot as Head of Security in the Sinyala facility. I thought you might be more calm if you knew the Animal responsible for taking care of you." He took his cap off and placed it under his arm. He reached into his jacket and pulled out a business card, his badge, phone, and pager number as well as name and species adorned on it.
"Here, to make it easier to reach me."
She looked into his eyes and tried to reach further beyond the facade of friendliness, if beyond that policeman there was someone that she could trust more than the lugs ordained to protect the weak.
And in her pause, in his hesitancy, she saw it. A glimpse perhaps, a fluke maybe, but something that reassured her. Lieutenant Strightman seemed to her, even if it was merely a moment, to have a good heart.
"You're one of us ain't you?"
He looked back with confusion, his smile not wavering. Although he seemed not much older than her thirty-three years he seemed to have been a cop forever.
"I beg your pardon?"
"You're close to hybrids, right? You have hybrid friends."
What followed was again most perplexing to Carol. Never in life would she have thought to have so much courage to just say what she thought. Maybe that was why hybrids were so important in the first place, because they challenged the old to try something new.
He seemed to hesitate more so out of uncertainty about how admitting to it publicly would come around to hurt him in some way. The pause was enough to answer the question to her.
"I do in fact." The friendly smile was gone, left was a deeply melancholic face that spoke more than any number of words would ever do.
"I'm glad," Carol replied.
"How come a researcher like you has hybrid friends?"
Carol smiled a bit at the question, it was as valid to inquire about as anything.
"I met my partner during the mandatory state checkups that the Sublime Beastar ordered. Even though he deserves all kinds of punishment for what he's planning to do to them I am thankful that I met my partner through this... I don't even know if it will last, but I do care for him. And as his mate, it is my duty to protect... And if I have to go into the belly of the beast then so be it... I don't care anymore..."
Carol again was astonished by her own courage to just open herself up. So astonished in fact that she began to regret it. The suspicion started to arise that maybe Strightman was simply following protocol, getting her to expose herself as a hybrid sympathizer without any outward pressure at all. She had asked him about it for Rex's sake. She was close to breaking out into tears at his silence when Strightman took the cap out from under his arm and let it hang loosely, that expression of melancholy turning into restrained anguish.
"My wife's a deer... There's not a day where I am not afraid for the life of my kid. I don't want them born into a world where everyone hates them simply because their parents didn't fit into whatever fucking mold the state has decided would be used for everyone..."
Following the trend that Yajuu had set, following the trend of things that astonished her completely, Carol hugged Strightman. It took a moment but then so did Strightman enclose her arms around her, softly holding as she pressed on tightly.
They let go, even though both seemed affected by that moment of emotional release. It was needed, that much was certain.
"Thank you Lieutenant... I'll feel safe with you willing to protect me."
"Don't mention it."
He looked up, meeting her eyes.
"Don't stop fighting, no matter how hard it is out here..." With those words, Strightman turned around and walked back to his cruiser. The speed walk of before was a much softer and relaxed strut now.
Carol smiled to herself as she watched him walk away, seeming much less tense than before. On the drive back to the city she had a large smile on her face all the while. She parked at the Beast Apartments.
She knocked on the door and didn't have to wait for long.
"Hey, Carol-"
She kissed him, Yajuu needing a moment to realize what was going on before properly reciprocating. She closed the door behind them, the world a little better than when she first left her apartment today.
Meanwhile, a few doors over Juno sat on the ground, agitated to the point that she nearly began rocking herself on the floor.
Legosi hadn't come home yesterday evening and today after worrying the entire night she had made the call to the police to declare him missing. Louis was of no help, having gotten himself into prison through trying to protect his own family all the while Juno felt like she was too stupid to protect her own.
She had slept sparingly for a few hours over the night, continually awoken by sirens and distressed to the point of restlessness by Legosi's absence.
She called in sick, thinking for a moment that Legosi might find it needless for her to upheave her own life just because he was late, but she refuted the imaginary conflict within her mind already. That was what relationships were all about, caring about the other to the point of madness if something happened to them. But he had never come home...
She briefly contemplated if leaving was the correct thing to do, what if he came home and suddenly she herself was missing? Of all things she didn't want him to go through the same conundrum that she was currently going through.
But when it turned six she just couldn't sit around anymore. She slipped into some jeans, put on her shoes, and grabbed a jacket blindly from the closet. Later on, she'd realized it was too long to be hers, but the faint smell of him calmed her somehow.
She wandered out from home as the sun was nearly reaching the edge of the horizon, the many buildings drawing the zones of shadow longer and longer.
She didn't have to go long till she reached the grimy district that was full of lights even at this hour. She pushed past the many droves of people, the smell of meat on the street being so meaningless to her that if she didn't see the stalls she wouldn't be able to tell where she was.
She kept an eye out, her nose blinded by the meats and many customers. She felt tears nearing the threshold of crying, yet she soldiered on. If she stopped she would surely start full-on trembling. The walking however proved to be not enough of a distraction. She picked up the speed, turning into an alleyway, finding herself in the dead end where nothing but a dumpster spent her some company. She sat on the dusty floor and let the tears flow, grabbing at her face.
The world turned into the smears of an oil painting as she covered her face with her fingers. She felt a burning at her forehead, her strong grip digging her claws into her skin. She released the grip, her body shaking up and down as she sobbed.
How could everyone regard love as this beautiful thing if all it ever did for her was create this burning yearning in her chest? Were they bound to repeat these behaviors until one of them perished? The thought of Legosi lying dead in someone's shabby basement among a pile of other corpses made her sob even more.
How in the world was she supposed to keep a clear head and solve this problem? Who would she even ask? Who had the power to do anything? She had contacted the police, but that would take too long. The one thing she knew from her Cherryton days was that the competent Policemen were outnumbered by the stupid and feeble-minded.
Juno looked up from her lap and suddenly was ripped from her sadness partially. Where before there was only the light from the market strip were now four shapes. Shadows.
She out of instinct scooted backward to the wall. She didn't want to interact with anyone, least of all the types to dwell in the Black market longer than they had to. She lamented leaving the apartment now.
"That's a lovely smell."
"A wolfess at this hour? What a treat."
"Hey there, little girl! Ever had a real man?..."
Laughter, terrifying laughter. She knew what they were, men who left their homes to wreak havoc in the streets. Men that had no concept of consent. Men that left their wives at home to seek more venues for their carnal pleasures. Shadows of Carnivores.
She readied her claws and began to sit up. She wanted to look ready for their pounce however the smell of stress betrayed her.
"Awww, ain't that sweet."
"I like the wild ones, a fight makes it more fun."
"Don't worry, you'll enjoy this."
A pair of coyotes, a wolf, and a lumbering bear. The three canines approached in a cool strut, tugging at their belts, cold hunger in their eyes. The bear simply walked in line, silently wandering without any sign of mental presence. When Juno walked into the remedial light of the strip the faces lit up in surprise. Positive surprise even.
"Haha! Our lucky day! I thought Beastars weren't allowed to buy meat... and least of all a smokeshow like you." One of the Coyotes looked her up and down. She felt ready to throw up.
"Oh a smokeshow alright, she looks ready to eat." The wolf replied, already having discarded his belt.
They approached closer and closer. Juno knew she could fight off the coyotes maybe, but the bear and wolf were gonna be a problem. They were too large for her.
She readied her claws and began to growl, she wasn't going to give up, least of all when she was already down.
"God I love wolves. Come here!" The Coyote stepped forward to grab, a soft whip stopping him in his tracks. They looked behind themselves, Juno moving further , not letting herself be distracted.
"Jō?" The wolf asked as the bear looked behind himself to reveal a silver dart with a dark blue brush at its back. The bear seemed to stay on his legs for a few seconds before tipping over and falling flat onto his face.
"TAKE THIS YOU BASTARD" Juno rammed her claws into the first Coyote's groin, a painful scream answering the action as she ripped with full strength. The Coyote fell to the floor writhing in pain as he grabbed at his groin, blood flowing from the tears in the fabric.
"Yasushi! You crazy bitch will pay for THAT!" The wolf approached, pulling back his fist.
Juno raised her head at the pure white wolf, seeing a black shadow standing atop the wall that she got cornered against. She had little time to react before the shadow jumped down crushing the wolf flat against the floor.
Juno had no time to waste, charging the last Coyote, throwing him to the floor. She swiped with her claws through his face over and over again until she realized she couldn't stay without being in danger of the surprise attacker targeting her next. She began to run towards the market strip when a shape jumped out from behind the corner, holding her tight.
"It's alright Kiddo, it's alright." She vaguely recognized the voice and looked up to see.
Dr. Gouhin Smile at her. In her near delirious state she engulfed the doctor in her arms, crying Into his chest.
"Thank you. Thank you... Legosi's gone, He's gone, he's, he's- I'm so damn scared..."
"Slow down, slow down..."
"What the hell are you doing back here, Juno?"
She turned around to see the angry face of Bill, the incapacitated shadows behind him. His anger lightened up the moment he saw the tears on her face.
"What's going on?"
"We'll get to that sure enough, now first let's restrain them and call the police. We'll get you somewhere safe, Kiddo." Gouhin patted her back and moved over to the bastards.
With the help of Bill, Dr. Gouhin moved the 4 into a circle, tying the handcuffs to each other. He looked at the Coyote with the bleeding crotch, he was whimpering. Gouhin barely smirked.
"Risk of your hobby, Sir. If you're lucky you get to keep it, though if we're honest you deserve it torn off."
Gouhin reloaded his dart rifle and slung it on his back.
"Let's get you some tea and then you'll tell us what's going on, alright?"
Soon they sat within the main living quarters of Dr. Gouhin, a small and cozy utility room behind the main therapy space. They were safe from the smell of savagery that permeated the walls in the main room while also having a much more homely feel. Juno sat on the couch by the window to the driveway of the back of the clinic. She drank tea and felt the need to clutch it with both hands in order to not spill it.
"Legosi came home two days ago and said that he killed someone... An Omnivora member. He said he felt terrible about it and didn't want to work for the state any longer. So yesterday he went out to talk to Tokugawa and... never came home." She closed her eyes, tears flowing from her face.
Gouhin moved up and sat down beside her, gently running his hand over her back. He elected to stay silent, no words of encouragement being fitting here.
"Well at least we have an idea of where to look," Bill said with the usual spark of anger as he looked out of the window.
"Where?" Juno looked up at him with hope in her eyes. Bill crossed his arms, almost one-to-one mirroring the pose that Gouhin had made when he first met them on their way to the Shishigumi hideout. His defined muscles weren't too far off from Gouhin either.
"Where do people go that no one wants to see? The black market. What is the one part of the Black market that no one goes to? The derelict supermarkets in the east wing. And where do Hybrids keep popping up? The very same supermarkets in the east wing."
"We know it's their headquarters, but we have no idea of knowing if they keep prisoners there."
"Where else, Gouhin?" Bill asked, the tension in the room making his tail whip from left to right.
"There's another thing." Juno weakly said.
"Yesterday after Legosi was gone I got a call from Louis. He shot some policemen at the border of the city highway. Only injured them but eventually knocked them out... so he's in prison."
"Great..." Bill huffed.
"I think I need a cigarette." Gouhin voiced similar overwhelmedness.
"Well, Legosi is first priority. Louis will be in the small herbivore offender wing of the prison, he'll have to manage, but he won't be in any danger... now Legosi... he'll be tougher." Bill leaned against the table, tail swishing side to side, curving into a myriad of stressed shapes.
"I'll take a look tomorrow."
"I'll come with," Juno said, placing the tea to her side.
"I think it's best that you go home," Bill said in a monotone that earned him an aggressive awakening when the wolfess suddenly stood up, tears flowing over a rage-filled grimace.
"I'm coming with you. If I don't do anything to save him, then I might as well have just killed him myself!"
Bill couldn't argue with that even if he wanted to. He sighed.
"You can sleep on the couch, if anybody needs some sleep it's you."
"I can't, we need to go." Her body betrayed her words, her limbs sagging towards the floor as if they weighed thousands of pounds.
"Juno." Bill grabbed her by the arms, lowering her onto the couch again.
"If they just wanted to kill Legosi, then he would already be dead somewhere. You going now wouldn't change a thing. But if they kidnapped him then I need you rested and strong..."
Juno locked eyes with Bill, her world still full of oil painting smears through crying eyes.
"Thank you, Bill."
Bill answered with a small smile.
"He's as much my friend as he is your mate. And if we know that wolf then we both know he'll hold out until we come to help."
Not ten minutes later and Juno was sleeping on the couch, Legosi's jacket bundled around her. Meanwhile, Bill and Gouhin stood outside. A cigarette was hanging from Gouhin's mouth as per usual, Bill was holding a cup of tea with his metal appendage.
"What exactly is your plan?"
Bill took a swig from his tea and then lowered it again.
"I was hoping you'd tell Tokugawa about this and I'll scout them out."
Gouhin had an expression on his face that Bill had seen countless times.
"I'll keep my distance."
Gouhin breathed out a plume of smoke.
"How's Tokugawa meant to help you? He will hardly send his mob in there."
"I wouldn't be so sure."
Bill's answer caused the Panda to raise his brow.
"You told me as much that Melon's behavior is becoming as much a problem for him as Yahya. I'm thinking that if he hears that they kidnapped someone like Legosi that he would not be amused."
Gouhin nearly scoffed.
"I admire your hope, but this isn't an easy yes or no question. If he values any single person's life so much that he's willing to go to war then the black market will become the front line. Tokugawa's main interest has always been to keep the peace... Look, I like Legosi, he's a good kid with a heart in the right place. But as I see it, Tokugawa's hands are tied. Going to war with Melon isn't going to be good for anyone."
A silence followed. It was a reality check for Bill, yet he seemed unwavering based on only his expression.
"Then I'll have to do it myself."
"Kid you've lost your mind." Gouhin grabbed at his forehead.
"We've done it before and we'll do it again." Bill looked out there, hearing the car horns blasting on the main roads in the distance, all the while the Market still teamed with life.
"Your resolve is getting to your head. Just because you defied the odds once doesn't mean you'll do it twice."
Bill looked at Gouhin.
"Just like with that Bear, I'll have to do it. Just like you protect this place, so must I... and if anyone uses the cover of the night or a little hole in the ground to hide, I must exact justice."
"This isn't about justice-"
"What is it about then?" Bill's question and look stopped him in his tracks, Gouhin seemed to dwell on it for a few moments longer until he took another draw from his cigarette and blew it out through his nose.
"I'll try to help where I can, but when I think it's best to retreat you're on your own. I can't risk the safety of the Black market for your heroism."
Bill smiled at the cold and hard answer from his mentor.
"I didn't expect anything else... Thanks, Doctor."
"Don't bother. I'm killing, not helping you."
Bill looked again at this little home he made himself, and although his own relationship was struggling because of it, it filled with an intense feeling of purpose. This is where he belonged. No matter how much the heart ached for something else when it rarely did.
"I wouldn't be so sure, Gouhin."
Bill entered the clinic again, retreating to his own little storage room. Doctor Gouhin continued to smoke, questioning if he got too old for this line of work. He couldn't stop himself from being at least a little proud.
Music played in the background as the Omnivora Men continued their beatings on Taishiro. Richard was standing close to the wall, concentrating on the music. Electrical noise dictating in subtle ways the rhythm of the fists. It was a thing of civilization to seek rhythm, to recognize patterns. And so did one follow the pattern of music even with the more ugly of tasks.
Taishiro had been a good little researcher but a bad victim. Hadn't uttered a single word of info. Had taken every beating, and even when he started to lose teeth he remained quiet. Richard felt some kind of respect for the researcher. He was more resilient than Richard had first thought, strength always deserved admiration.
The beating stopped when the door opened, Melon entering.
"Nothing yet, boss. Quiet as a mouse." Said one of the thugs standing before the seated deer, ready to continue the beating. The carnivore ways within all of them found something innately satisfying about a fleshy punching bag that reacted even in the smallest ways to your punches.
Melon moved past his men, the two beaters taking a few steps back. The Geopard crouched down to be at eye level with the researcher.
"As much as you think you're keeping state secrets safe that will solve this pesky Hybrid problem, you are wrong. If I don't find what I need through you then I'll have my other sources. Agents in the facility that will gain its new permanent residence in-" Melon Checked his watch.
"-less than sixty hours. Perhaps even someone working directly for Yahya, someone willing to rat you all out."
Taishiro did nothing but shake his head, his breathing labored. His head was pointed to his side, unwilling to look Melon in the eyes.
"You're expendable, and I'm going to prove that to you now." Melon stood up, looking down at the trusty little researcher.
"Cut off his hand, eat it in front of him, then his forearm. Cauterize the wounds and don't let him bleed out." This order gained the first panicked look from the deer. Melon held eye contact.
"This continues until Sunday when he either talks or has been entirely consumed."
"No..." The small whimper came as the deer looked away, finally breaking out into tears.
"We'll see how much longer till his survival instinct finally kicks in. Call me if anything changes."
Melon walked over to Richard, speaking in a quiet tone.
"Make sure they're working with restraint."
With those words, Melon left the room and walked across back to his radio station when one of the burner phones in his pocket began to ring. He grabbed it and pressed the accept button.
"The new head for the research project is currently dating a hybrid." Lieutenant Strightman's observation came as a surprise to Melon.
"What do you have?"
"Photos as well as pretty vividly recalling a conversation in which she properly identified that I had ties to hybrids. A gut feeling, one that turned out to be correct."
"Give me the details."
"Dr. Carol, Rangifer Tarandus, thirty-three, a doctorate in general biology and family medicine, used to work in cancer research before that was swallowed up by the Hybrid research. Met a hybrid while she was put into the evaluations brought upon by the legislature. Her mate is twenty-five, named Yajuu-"
Melon tuned out for a moment. He had to properly recognize just what he had heard. To hear his friend romantically involved. For a moment Melon wasn't the freedom fighting Rebel that he had been ever since his rude awakening with the state a few years ago. Suddenly he was reduced to a kitten staying in the doorway to the bathroom, his mother in the bath beckoning him to come closer.
"Send the pictures via the train. Good work."
"Thanks, Sir." They hung up and for a moment Melon felt he was disconnected from reality.
This wasn't his skin, these weren't his teeth, these weren't his horns... This wasn't his life. Certain things you'd hoped to forget yet they had the habit of returning periodically. So as he did every now and then, so did he now think of his mother. The woman who deserved to have her face beaten in with an iron by her ten-year-old son.
She wanted it so, she had never even fought back.
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