Chapter 13

I was so focused on the shock of Danny's arrival, I didn't process the fact Croc was taking me back to where he slept until we were already on the roof. Thankfully, he didn't go for his bed. He led me to the backside, then released my hand and sat with his legs dangling over the backyard.

I should have asked to be taken back down. Even if I'd chosen to forget my million reasons to say no before, I remembered them now, vividly, and the thought of doing anything even remotely intimate with anyone, Croc included, made my skin crawl and stomach churn.

Still, I couldn't ask him to take me down. I knew I'd never fall asleep after what had just happened, and the thought of being without him while Danny was mere feet away was too daunting. I took the spot beside him, this time, leaving space between us.

Croc studied my profile. "I didn't bring you up here to break more rules, Willow. I did it so he'd think this is where you are. When you're ready, I'll take you down on this side, and you can go in through the back door."

My shoulders relaxed. There he went, being too perfect again. He kept doing that, smashing my perceptions, broadening my expectations. He'd even stood between me and one of the men I'd known, ready to defend with no reason to believe it would benefit him to do so. I sighed and relaxed. "Thank you."

"Do you want to go now?"

Our gazes held. I had a million questions, and no doubt, so did he. "Not yet."

"Good." He shifted to face me, pulling one leg up and holding his ankle with both hands. The position was so casual, it put me even further at ease. Croc wasn't worried about Danny.

"I'm still not sure if he's telling the truth," I said. "If he was sent, we're all dead already. If he wasn't, he may be tempted to use what he's found here to regain his position."

"He wasn't lying," he said, tapping his nose, then his ear. "I could tell when he lied, and he did, just not about that."

My eyes widened, then a broad smile stretched across my face. "That's...you are so fucking handy, Croc. You have no idea what it means to me that you can do that, right now." I took a deep breath and exhaled a huge chunk of the stress inside my chest. "What did he lie about?"

Croc held the stupidest grin. "Everything else. His behavior. The way he was with you was a lie." His expression darkened. "I can kill him, if you want, when you're ready." He rolled his shoulders then supported his weight onto one hand.

He'd said the words as if offering to drive me to work or help me move my furniture, not kill a man in cold blood and feed him to his alligator.

As if on cue with my thoughts, he added, "We could let the gators have most of him, then send him floating up to where they dump the sludge. That way, when they find him, it will make them even less likely to come in here."

It was a beautiful idea, but not one I was sure I could carry out. I shrugged. "Maybe later. Right now, I think it's best if we just keep him from leaving."

He nodded. "Gator won't let him wander."

We both fell silent, and the night grew impossibly still. But the silence wasn't heavy. No. It was easy, comfortable. It was the quiet I sometimes experienced in the morning, when the world was still asleep and fresh thoughts ran unhindered.

I leaned back on my elbows and stared up at the millions of stars. There was only one problem left to interfere with my somewhat peaceful existence, but the question wouldn't voice itself. I couldn't voice it. If I asked about what Danny had found, any answer would only solidify it as fact.

My heartbeat. Had I changed? Was I a mutant, just like everything else in this place? It made more sense than me staying the same, and the possibility disturbed me more than Danny ever could. It would bring a whole new level of death to the way things used to be. There'd be no going back, not for me, not ever.

My mind drifted, remembering the early days, when some of the countries still had different leaders, and the news constantly reported all the work being done in the space program. They'd tried to send people away, off to a distant Earth-like moon circling some distant planet. But the incubation didn't work, and everyone who tried, never made it and didn't return. The thought had been terrifying. I'd been barely a teenager, and I'd had nightmares about being up in space, adrift, staring down at Earth and having no way to get back.

This felt like that. It felt like I was becoming something alien, and I'd never be myself again. "Croc?"

"What's wrong?" His voice was soft, tone all-knowing. No doubt he could tell that I was on the verge of mental collapse.

I imagined he could, and in the quiet, surrounded by darkness and warm, night air, secrets didn't seem that important. "I'm scared."

The silence deepened, seconds becoming minutes, before he finally said, "I'll kill him in the morning."

I laughed. "Not Danny. He doesn't scare me, not with you here."

He hummed. "Willow?"

I turned to look at him. At some point, he'd laid back as well. His hands were clasped behind his head, face pointed toward the sky, eyes serenely shut. "Yeah?" I asked.

He cracked one eye open. "Say that again."

I stared at him. "Say what? That I'm not scared of Danny?" I laughed. "Yes, Croc. You are so strong. I've never felt as secure as I do in the circle of your raw, masculine protection."

He grinned as I continued, theatrically moving my hands and fawning over my salvation. At the end, I pressed the back of my hand to my forehead and swooned back down into my original position with tousled hair and heaving lungs.

Croc reached one hand over and gently pushed the hair out of my face.

I peeked over at him, grinning. "Was that good?"

He nodded but didn't speak. He had the most intent look on his face. Set mouth, tight jaw. After a moment's pause, he pulled his arm back, looked back to the sky, and the knot on his throat bobbed twice. "What are you afraid of?" he asked, voice deeper than before.

For a moment, I'd forgotten all about it. "My heartbeat," I said, and all at once, the seriousness collapsed back into place.

He rolled to his side and propped his head on his hand. "You don't have to be scared of that. It's for swimming. It won't hurt you."

"I know that. It's the change part I'm afraid of." I took a deep breath and laid my head down across my arm. "Everything I've ever known is different. The world is different. If I change, too, I'll have nothing left."

"The corn changed," he said. "But it's still corn. Just bigger." His tone seemed almost ancient in its simple wisdom. "When Julia taught me the right words to say, it didn't change who I was. It just made me better able to communicate—" he paused—"with you." His eyes shimmered a bit brighter. "You'll always be Willow. Now, you're just a Willow who won't drown."

I snorted. "I guess that's a good thing, then."

He smiled. "A very good thing."

The moonlight reflected off his face, adding depth to his angles and luminosity to his skin. Was he naturally beautiful or had that changed at some point, too? In one day, he'd managed to take himself from a person I avoided, to someone I confided in. I took note of our current position. How had this happened? I looked up at his face. No doubt he was thrilled, but I couldn't find it in myself to be angry. Not after everything he'd done and all the things he'd just said.

"You're a very sneaky wild man," I scolded. "I think it's time for me to go to bed."

His lips curved. "Alright, Willow." He pushed himself up to his feet and extended a hand to help me stand.

I took it and allowed him to carry me down, avoiding his attention until we'd made it to the back porch.

When he started to open the backdoor, I stopped him. "Wait."

He turned back to me, then allowed his hand to slide off the doorknob. "Yeah?"

"One more thing."

"You want me to kill him now?"

I shook my head and bit back a laugh. "No. I'll let you know if I do."

His head tilted and brows furrowed as he waited for me to continue.

I bit the inside of my lip. Dammit, I'd lost my mind. That had to be it. I had to have gone completely insane somewhere between talking alligators and surprise Danny. Regardless, none of that dominated my thoughts. Not tonight. Not now. What Croc had given me was something I hadn't had in years. Security. Peace of mind. A moment of simply being, and an ear to lay all my burdens to rest on. I wanted to give him something in return, something I'd never given freely to another living soul.

"Bend down," I said before I could change my mind.

Croc did as asked, bending at the waist until his face was level with mine.

"Don't move," I warned.

He nodded, gaze intent and searching.

I cupped his face, holding his eyes with mine, then softly pressed my lips to his in a kiss far more innocent than the ones he'd given me. "Thank you," I said, stepping back.

Croc nodded again, frozen for a moment, before he regained his senses and straightened back to his full height. "Goodnight, Willow," he said, voice rough. Then, he turned and...tripped, falling off the back steps.

I reached out, but I wasn't fast enough. He sprawled across the ground below, then scrambled back to his feet and waved a hand up into the air. "I'm okay," he said. "That didn't hurt at all."

I threw a hand over my mouth and watched him start back toward the side of the house.

I shouldn't tease him. Should I? Oh hell, why not? "You sure you're okay?" I called.

"I'm great," he said, still refusing to look back.

I chewed my lip, biting back laughter, then reached behind myself to grip the doorknob. "Oh, okay. As long as you're sure."

"I'm sure."

I twisted it and pulled it open a crack. "Well, then, if you don't need me to kiss it better, I'll just head on to bed."

"Wait!"

He didn't get a chance to finish before I slipped through the opening, shut the door, and fell into a heap of silent laughter against it.