"We have to test him." Jason hissed quietly, trying his best not to be too loud. 

Him and his three brothers were in a secret passageway under the stairs. Alfred could be around the corner for all they knew.

" I agree, he must have meta powers. " Tim nodded along with the Scenario.

"And how old is he?! He has to be immortal." Dick added. 

" I believe Pennyworth is at least 70 years of age. " Damian estemated. 

 "I am not old enough not to know when certain young lads are speaking my name." A slightly peeved voice sounded from the darkness behind them. Dick squeaked and hopped back in Jason's lap, who slowly looked behind him.

 Damian covered the scare with a poker face and Tim looked like he was about to faint. Alfred was dusting the walls. 

Dusting. The. Walls.

"I happend to be dusting the chambers. And I stumbled across this... meeting." Alfred explained.

 The boys were still pretty freaked out. They rushed walked to Dicks room, settling themselves on the floor or his bed. After a full ten minuets, Jason spoke. "You see, he's always there at the right times!" he waved his hands in the air to prove his point.

 "That can be a coincedence? " Dick said, unsure.

"Yeah." Tim mummered. " A coincedence. "  

Damian got up from the floor. "I simply believe that Pennyworth is spying on us." 

 "But wouldn't we know? I mean, we're all trained by Batman. " Tim frowned. 

Dick shook his head furiously "he was also trained by the bat."

Then Bruce chuckled from the doorway, frightening his wards.

"Whats so funny? " Jason growled.

 "Alfred wasn't just trained by the bat, he is better than the bat." Bruce's four sons gave him astonished looks. 

"N-no way. " Tim stuttered, awestruck.

 "I do not believe that is correct, why are you feeding us false information Father?" Damian denied.

 "Well, if he's that good, then why isn't he batman? " Jason pointed out. 

 "Beacuse, master Jason. I don't have as good of bones as I used to." Alfred stated, exiting the closet.

"How long have you been there? " Dick gwaked. 

"The whole time" Alfred left the room.

 "What is he? " Tim could only watch as their butler left the room. 

"I have no idea." Bruce sighed. 

~Later that night~

 "He could be a robot." Dick suggested.

 "Oh my gosh! He is! We have to prove it though." Tim yelled in a hushed voice. 

"The old man is in the Kitchen. " Jason informed. "Lets go."

 "I shall not contribute in such trival matters. " Damian huffed. 

"Come on demon, Your coming." Jason grabbed Damian's wrist, and dragged him out the room. They all sat in the living room, watching through a camera in the Kitchen from Tims laptop. 

 The man was cooking like usual Dick was about to call the mission off, until something happened. Spaghetti sauce was splattered all over the camera. Blocking the view. 

 Oddly, they didn't hear breaking glass, Or any sound at all from the Kitchen. "He threw it?" Jason asked. 

Tim shook his head "No one can throw a can from that angle. " 

 "Well Alfred could, come on before we get cought." Dick whispered as the boys started back.

 "Masters next time you spy on me, please be more quiet. " Alfred appeared from the halls that the boys were about to go into. "Dinner will be ready in 5 minutes sirs." And with that, he left. 

"Who knows, he could have levatated the sauce. " Jason added to fill in the awed silence.

~ Five minuets later~ 

The four boys are unusually quiet, as their butler stood by the table. Staring blankly ahead. "So... Where's Bruce?" Tim asked, not liking the silence one bit.

 "Master Bruce is... Gone" Alfred said emotionlessly.

 "Wait, What!" Jason yelled.

 "Inside voices master Jason." Alfred reprimanded.

"I'm not going to use my inside voice, you just said that Bruce fucking Wayne is dead! " he yelled even louder this time. 

"Not dead... Just... Gone." Alfred finally looked Jason dead in the eye. 

Jason. was. horrified.

"Pennyworth. Fetch me some more food." Damian rudely shoved the plate in the man's hands, and pushed him out of the door. Locking it behind him. 

 "Somethings off, That isn't Alfred." Tim concluded. 

"Than why does it look so much like him?! " Jason screamed, close to panic.

"Jay, calm down-" Dick was cut off by the door being blown to bits. Alfreds eyes glowed faintly, then went back to normal.

 "I don't like naughty young masters talking behind my back." He said in the creepiest voice the brothers have ever heared. Even Joker would stop smiling at that tone. 

" Yeah, that's not Alfred! " Dick screeched.

 "Run, to the cave!" Tim cried, he didn't need to tell the others twice, they were already running.

The makeshift family sprawled out on the caves floor, lockdown mode already being activated. There was no way the butler was getting in.

Damian muttered something about retreating being for weaklings, the others opted for ignoring the youngest.

"What do we do?! " Jason gasped for air.

"We need Find bruce." Dick decided, giving Jason a pat on the back.

 "That's our best shot. " Tim agreed, only to be interrupted by Damian.

"We need to Kill him"

The other three spared Damian an incredulous look before continuing.

 "Okay, Tim and Damian, You two go find Bruce. Me and Jason will hold Alfred off." Dick orderd.
Then, as if summoned, the butler materialized out of the shadows, stepping in front of the two youngest. 

 "Your not going anywhere. "

Tim stepped back as Alfred lunged at him. 

"My apologies, pennyworth. I never liked you anyways." Damian then, kicked the butler hard on the head. Instead of the sound of flesh hitting flesh, there was a metallic cling.

 A part of Alfred's face fell back, Revealing rows of mechanical parts. Damian hissed a little and cradled his foot, droping to the caves floor.

"Go!" Dick yelled, hitting the robot in the leg with his escrema sticks.

 Tim nodded, and ran to the medical bay. Damian staying behind, tending to his foot. Once Tim got there, he was astonished by the sight before him. Bruce was on the bed, a piece of cloth over his mouth as he struggled to get out of his restraints.

Once the cloth was out, Bruce warned. "Look out, behind you!"

everything went black. 

 "... And that was my dream. " Tim finished off the story. 

Jason burst out laughing, Dick gave Tim a concerned look, and Damian raised an eyebrow. 

"Rest assured, master Tim. I would not turn in a million years." Alfred said, amusement evident  in his eyes.

 "So does that mean your a robot? " Tim asked. Alfred simply walked away. "Hey! You never answered my question!" Tim chased after him.

 "A million years... " Dick mummbled. "So he is an immortal dinosaur." 

" I heard that master Dick. "

 ===

A/n: I hope you laughed as Much as I did when I made this.