•Jameel

I'm not sure anyone knows how to love a queen or how to treat her better than she should be treated?

Now I know all queens must have had names that started with a letter 'B' and Basma is no different.

Gifts, unfulfilled promises and poisonous lies were the ways to her unyielding heart that I thought would never stop beating for me but here I was striving to make her see why there was not a single male better than I for her.

When will it be the right time to finally prove my love to her and she'll listen? Where do I start from?

I'm trying to leave the cult for good—without dying of course. I want to return to the way of Allah S.W.A, his prophet's and his books. I have seen the haqq, truth, and now, I know that I have been decieved to commit shirk.

I've been a monster for as long as our marriage lasted and now, I don't think she'll want anything to do with me.

She used to look at me—at the beginning of our marriage—as if I was a god, adoringly. I knew she fell for me eventually and was willing to do anything for me. I was her eye candy—the love of her life—and she was mine.

What changed? There was never a change—I've always been the same just that I couldn't pretend to be her perfect husband anymore.

My past life kept coming back with messengers who undoubtedly wouldn't let me rest—in my dreams and reality—with flashes of my most recent atrocities committed to appease the deity's and I couldn't resist the devil's summoning.

I didn't realize I loved her till I lost her. Now I believe in all the cheesy nonesense she made me watch with her—I missed it in fact.

"I see she's still crying." I noted.

Jimoh nodded from the corner of the living room where he stood with his hands behind his back.

"I'll go and see her. Stay there and watch everything before I come back." I gestured for him to enter the room with the TV's.

"Yes sir."

I exited the room and made for the stairs to her room. From the outside, I could hear her sniffing and talking to herself but none of it was audible. I knocked before pushing the door open.

She was on the floor supplicating in one of the hijab's I bought specially for her to be using in the mean time.

"Can we talk?"

A cough escapes her lips and she wipes away her tears. I run to her immediately and kneel before her, "Are you ok?"

"Yes. Why wouldn't I be?" She forced a fake smile onto her face as she closed her pocket Qur'an and dropped it on the bed beside her.

"So, can we talk?" I asked again.

"Sure, about what?"

"Th-e-e wedding." I stuttered nervously as I was scared to death when I heard her crying earlier. I feared she'd change mind now.

I knew I wasn't giving her much options but then I needed her in my life. Being in prison made me reflect on my actions and I wanted to be a better husband to her.

If I can't have her the no one can—Bashir too would've to be annihilated if he falls for her.

"Ok, go on. I'm listening." She replied with her eyes casted to the ground. This reminded me of the night of our wedding when the house became silent after those that conveyed her to my house left. It was then that the realization of being married hit both of us—well, I felt it—I'm not sure if she did.

She couldn't look up at me. All she did was stare at her henna stained hands and twiddle her thumbs till I told her to get up and perform her wudu, ablution, to join me and pray before we retired for the night in our separate rooms.

"I wanted to know if you were still interested in getting married."

She glared at me without saying a word.

"Please talk to me."

"Do I have a choice?" She spat.

"You do. The choice is marrying me then gaining your freedom to acquire more choices. It's simple."

She glared at me while shaking her head, "I already said I will marry you."

"Are you sure? You seem to be in a lot of tension."

"Yes, I'm sure. Please leave so that I can continue doing what I was doing."

I stood up and left on her command and promised to return so that we could have dinner together.

I went back to the camera room and relieved Jimoh of his duties for the evening as I sat to watch my beautiful bride-to-be pray to the Almighty. It wasn't that I didn't notice her anguish but I just wanted her to realize that I was now a different person who could love genuinely and be loved too.

My phone chimed and to my surprise it was my father that was calling.

"Hello, Jameel?"

"Na'am, yes, Baba."

"How are you my child? I thought you would've changed your number by now."

Change my number? Why? Does he know I'm with Basma?

"I'm fine Baba. How are you, mama, Inteesar and the hospital?"

"Well, they're all good. The hospital is still functioning."

"That's good to hear. So, are we still on the Inteesar and Rayyan plan or you're going to let her marry Bashir?"

I prayed he'd say Bashir because I didn't want to have to commit another murder and it'll be because of Basma.

He hissed lightly, clearly displeased with my question, "I know she doesn't love Rayyan but he'll be our path to a mountain of more riches."

"Baba, I think you should let her pick Bashir. He's also working and can take care of her."

"No! I want a more successful person as my son-in-law. She can't do that to our family."

"What if he becomes as successful as you want?"

"I hope he's not into anything dubious?"

I felt a sharp tug rip at my heart as the question hit me. It felt as if he knew about my world of fetishism and occultism.

What if he knew about the brethren of  Jezebel? I doubt he did though. No one  in my family knew except those who initiated me into  the cult five years ago; Jeremiah, Al-Mustapha, Muneer, Paul and I.

"N-n-no why?"

"Because he looks like he's most likely to end up as those people doing yahoo yahoo."

I laughed so much till I was out of breath, "Baba yahoo yahoo? No, Bashir is too good for that. If you want I can give him a job as one of the heads of the departments instead of being my personal assistant."

"I'll think about it."

"Baba just say yes. I'm sure Inteesar would be very happy if she hears this."

"Are you the one marrying him? What is your problem?!"

"No, but..."

"Don't no but me. I just don't like the idea of Inteesar with him but I said I'll think about it. You even made me forget why I called!"

"Sorry, try and remember."

My old man has always had a very short temper. He needed anger management, if you told him he'd even try to slap you. I and my siblings tried to get him help once but he refused, saying he didn't want us infiltrating his mind with mentality from the West.

I heard him hitting a pen on his desk repeatedly—he always did that when he was aggravated. He spoke up after some seconds passed.

"I just called to tell you that I wanted to call a truce. I don't want you do sign the papers again."

"Really Baba?" I exclaimed.

"Yes." He laughed heartily, "I guess I was just going to end up in a lot of trouble."

"I never thought I'd ever hear that. Baba you know that it's illegal and I'm glad you've finally accepted that."

"Yes, goodbye. I have work to do. Don't call me and disturb me about any Bashir again till I tell you my answer."

"Ok. Goodbye."

I could already hear him throwing his phone on his table in the office while I hung up immediately as I heard the sound of a phone hitting wood.

Dinner was served not long after and I convinced Basma to take a walk outside with me once we had devoured our dinners. I was waiting for her to ask where we were but she hasn't since the first day here when I managed to evade the question.

She walked sluggishly with a limp in her gait and I wondered if she was alright.

"Why are you walking that way? What's wrong?"

"I'm tired!"

"Should we go back upstairs?"

"No let's stay here and play with sand." She bawled sarcastically, "Of course I want to go back upstairs!"

I sighed and did a three-sixty with her back to the house.

We silently strolled back into the house, picked up some snacks from the kitchen—well, me—before heading upstairs.

Now, we were in her room and I offered to bring her more food while check she didn't reject. Her appetite has increased in the past twenty four hours and she's been acting a bit differently—sleeping more and requesting for the oddest combination of foods.

"Why are you looking at me that way?" I asked as I dropped the food in front of her.

She shook her head, smiling sheepishly, "I was just thinking about some thing."

"What were you thinking about?"

"I can't tell you." She cleared her voice and begged to use the bathroom.

Now that she seemed to be in a good mood, I decided to try and squeeze the answer out of her.

"Why can't you tell me? Am I not your husband? You have to trust me."

She laughed, hissed and muttered some inaudible things before speaking directly to me, "I trust you b-baby. I was actually thinking about you but I was too shy to tell you."

Her mood swings too were becoming a topic I've become worrisome about. One minute, she's joyful and cracking jokes and the next, she's cursing and insulting me.

"You? Shy? That's impossible. You've changed so much."

She looked down on the carpet and drops of tears fell onto the surface of her purple hijab, "I have changed a lot. You were just absent and I'm sorry, I know it was all my fault."

"Don't cry. It's not your fault. I was a bad husband and you were suffocated."

My body almost jumped off the chair I was on to hug her but that'd be haram for us. I couldn't even wait for our wedding any longer. She said she wanted it next month.

I didn't realize when she'd stopped sobbing. Her body layed lifelessly on the floor and it seemed, her breath had siezed.

For a few seconds, I lost it. I didn't know what to do or who to call. I couldn't have an extra death to my name.

My phone pinged, bringing me back to reality. The sight before me shattered me. I held her wrist and touched it with two fingers to search for a pulse and indeed, there was one.

I slumped to the ground in elated satisfaction upon realizing she wasn't dead. Nonetheless, I rushed to call the hospital and drove her there myself.

I'm in the office with one of my trusted doctor's, Dr Shamsudeen. He's about to explain the cause of her subitaneous collapse.

"Good evening Alhaji Jameel." He shook my hand and took his sit opposite mine.

"What's wrong with her?"

"Calm down sir. I have good news for you."

I nodded, "Yes?"

He cleared his voice as he rubbed his hands on his lap, "Your wife is two weeks pregnant."

"Pregnant?"

He frowned, "Yes. Is that a problem?"

"No, not at all. Is she awake?"

"Yes. But please don't bother her. She needs as much rest as she can get in her condition. Her blood pressure is too high for now so she has to stay in the hospital so that we can get it to stabilize before she leaves."

"Ok. Thank you Dr Shamsudeen."

I exited his office and made for her room which was in the third floor.

"Salamu Alaykum." I greeted before opening the door to find her crying, snot all over her face.

Silence.

She didn't look up even as her body stiffened upon realizing it was me at the door.

"Talk to me. Are you ok?"

"How would I be ok when I just found out I was pregnant!"

"Who's the father?"

"I'm not sure." She wailed, chewing on her neatly trimmed fingers.

"God! Basma you're so stupid."

She snickered and looked outside the window, staring ahead as if there was anything interesting happening.

I watched her get off the bed and walk straight to the toilet but I didn't stop her to avoid getting trapped in an argument with her.

She came back into the room, rested her back against the bathroom door and fixated her nearly tear dry eyes on me, making the distance between us seem like a miles run.

"You know," She smiled, "You can let me go now since you probably don't want to marry me again."

"What do you mean by that! I promised you in the beginning of our marriage that I'd stand by you. Do you think that a child would stop me from doing that? If eventually he finds his/her way into this Earth I'd gladly help raise the baby with you."

"That's sweet but how about the father?"

"I'll help you find him and you can both work out whichever co-parenting technique you'd like to use. Ok?"

"Ok."

She walked back to the bed and covered herself with a blanket then I left, knowing that that was my cue to give her space to figure things out for herself.

****

The next day...
19:20PM

Today was a hectic and busy day so I had to send Jimoh and a few guards to check up on her and take her meals to her. Now that I was less busy, I planned to visit her but the traffic on the Gibson Jalo way isn't encouraging. I wasn't sure I'd get to see her at the time I wanted to.

Also, I had to move stealthily to avoid the eyes of the public—making night time the best time—since I knew people, especially Sa'adatu and Afaf were looking for me. A certain percentage of the country's population already think I'm the person holding Basma captive.

Back at the house, I got the chef to prepare her favorite food: Semovita and egusi soup with catfish pepper soup as an appetizer.

I arrived at the hospital a bit later than I wanted to with her basket of food in my right hand and a bag of clothes with her womanly necessities inside.

The doctor invited me to his office to discuss the processes of her prenatal care and why it was crucial she made the clinical visits.

He explained that he'd already relayed every information she needed to her so all I had to do was help her return regularly to engage in the examination.

After bidding each other goodbye for the night, I left to her room.

Immediately she saw me, she frowned and languidly moved to turn her body to her left side of the bed to avoid facing me. I wanted to blame her attitudinal change and her rebuttal on our marriage on the forthcoming child but I knew better.

She didn't want to marry me at all. I want to show her that I'm a changed man but her refusal to give me a chance is making her see this as a form of abduction.

"I'm back." I announced, "Here's your food." I dropped the basket on the floor where she faced from her side of the bed and showed her the bag, "This contains all you'll need; clothes, lotion, underwear, pads. And before I forget, your hand bag with everything we travelled with is there except your phone. I'll give you twice a week to talk to your family."

She cringed at my mention of pads and underwear but could she blame a man she'd lived it. I knew almost everything about her, from the way she liked her food cooked to the kind of underwear she enjoyed wearing and her favorite television shows. Wasn't I a great husband?

"Thank you."

She didn't say anything again after that. I served her everything that was cooked and she ate it all without leaving anything in any of the coolers.

"You're welcome."

She started crying again and I moved to her bed to hug her. I thought she'd push me away but she did the opposite and pulled me in more and I couldn't have been more happier today.

"I'm sorry." She wept, "You deserve a better wife."

"You're the better wife." I held her hands and kissed the back of both then wiped away the tears with baby wipes.

"I wish I could agree with that."

"Why don't you want to marry me?"

I couldn't hold it in again. I had to ask her if I wanted to sleep tonight.

"I never said that." She cried, "I just said that I knew you wouldn't want to marry me because of the baby and now that I know that you still want this, I'm happy." She smiled and blew me a kiss.

My heart fought to fly out of my chest as it did a celebratory dance in honour of her utterance but all I did was gasp and stare at her big brown otbs that stared back at me. Her thin lips remained in a pout and I begged my legs to stay still before I'd run to kiss her.

"I'm so happy to hear this. Can we do the wedding as soon as you leave the hospital?"

"If that's what you want, yes." She shrugged, "I guess we have to do this before my belly becomes a sack."

I laughed, she joined me and that was how we ended the night with a series of light reminiscent banter.
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It's been a while since I left an AN. How was the story? Did you enjoy it? Please vote and leave a comment ❤️

Your thoughts on Jameel and Basma?

Pregnant! You see this Basma ba? She doesn't even know the father and I know who y'all are thinking 🤣🤣

I have left a hint for y'all to figure out where they are. Guess their location and I'll dedicate the next chapter to you😏

Before I forget, please check out my sister's book Dreams and Discoveries! Thank youuuu eesh nation.

~Aisha Safiyanu🥀