chapter twelve
she whose mind wanders

$$

          There were only two types of people in the world. Izzy Windsor was sure of that notion. You see, she liked to think of people as if they were songs. You could tell a lot about a person by the music they listened to, and she stood by that. Because when you thought about it there were the people who just listened to the music, and then there were the people who spent hours overanalyzing the lyrics, trying to resonate with the words. The latter were the type of people who could just feel the music rather than just listening to it to fill the silence.

          People who just listened to the music, the meaning going over their head as they did, could care less for the lyrics as long as it had a good beat and it was easy to dance to. The people who watched her on her website were those types of people. They didn't care about the music she played in the background; they just saw a pretty girl and tuned out the world. They were the ones who walked the earth without a care in the world. Izzy found herself envying those people from time to time.

          Then there were the people who didn't just listen to the music. These people tended to be more analytical; the type to pour their whole soul into something they were passionate about even if they received nothing in return. They were the type to know the meaning of their favorite songs, and latch onto them as if they were their lifeline. Izzy was one of those people. She liked music almost as much as she liked art.

          Music gave her a sense of direction; a sense of freedom. No one could take that away from her. But in being one of those people, Izzy had discovered one thing. She quickly realized sometimes things just found her when she needed them to find her. She believed that. For her, the lyrics to particular songs just found her at the right moments in her life, but other things found her, too.

          Being one of those people who always looked for the deeper meaning behind everything had landed her in this situation with the search for the gold from the Royal Merchant. Had she been the other type, she probably would have rolled her eyes at the thought of going on a wild goose chase. But she wasn't. She was the type to overanalyze everything, and take stupid things like stumbling upon a conversation she wasn't supposed to hear as a sign.

          Sure, Izzy was going along with this to make sure Sarah wouldn't get herself killed, but a part of her knew her decision went deeper than that. A part of her wondered if the universe finally took one look at her and decided to spare her an ounce of pity. Maybe this suicide mission was a sign. It sure as hell seemed like one. It was just too convenient. First, she broke up with Rafe and declared she was trying to let all her bullshit go, and then she just so happened to stumble upon this. It was like the universe was pointing to the path she was meant to take. Maybe this was her new beginning that she had been secretly hoping for her entire life.

          There was still this uneasy feeling gnawing at her heart, but she was trying to find a way to mend it to be whole again. That was all she could do—try. Maybe this wild goose chase would be her antidote.

          Izzy let herself believe she'd find the antidote on this mission to recover the gold from the Royal Merchant. She knew it sounded stupid, but it was all she had. It was a stupid little thing called faith, but she had to take this as a sign. There had to be a deeper meaning. Maybe being the type of person to overanalyze stupid shit like songs had finally come in handy. And if she just looked at the situation as if it were a song, then maybe it'd ease her nerves and she'd find the answers to the questions floating around in her brain.

          With those fleeting thoughts consuming her mind, Izzy pulled into the dirt driveway leading to a small house. It might have been John B's place or maybe one of the others, but she didn't really know. She just followed John B's ugly van to this place, and she didn't question it. They were apparently meeting the others to discuss the plan. So Izzy sighed and parked her convertible, turning it off before she opened the door and slid out. Her Birkenstocks smacked the ground as she followed John B and Sarah up the porch attached to the house.

          Izzy glanced around the small screened-in porch, finding the area to be decorated with a sofa along with an armchair and a small stool. The furniture encircled a small coffee table that was covered in magazines. It wasn't much, but it felt cozy like a warm embrace. This was home to somebody. Izzy had never felt at home anywhere. She wondered what it felt like.

          John B glanced over his shoulder and eyed Izzy, who was still looking around the room. "I think the guys are inside, but Kie's not here yet," he said as he glanced between the two blondes. "Uh, you guys can sit down if you want." He gestured to the sofa before he sent a smile Sarah's way then disappeared inside the small house to search for the other boys.

          The sound of a heartbeat . . . scratch that, Izzy's heartbeat pounded in her ears as she thought about the others joining them. She wasn't sure why she felt that way, but for some reason, she thought she was nervous. And Izzy Windsor didn't get nervous. It wasn't like her. She wanted the uneasy feeling to diminish, so she tried ignoring the pounding in her ears as she approached the sofa and sat down on the cushions. Dust danced in the air as Sarah sat down beside her, and Izzy swatted the particles away in annoyance.

          Izzy bit her lip as she anticipated what the others would say about two rich bitches joining in on their thing. But then she heard a voice—JJ's voice—and her mind halted.

          "Bro, what would we get pissed at?" JJ asked as he pushed open the door leading to the porch and stepped onto the creaky floorboards with John B and Pope following behind him. He ran a hand through his blond waves as he turned around, seemingly unaware of the two blonde girls sitting in front of him. But then he glanced up and his eyes found Izzy's green ones, and his lips twitched into a soft smile. "Iz?"

          Izzy subconsciously straightened her posture as the corners of her lips perked up into a smile. She quickly bit her lip to contain her grin, and focused her attention on the boy standing before her. He swore a gray shirt with cut-off sleeves and tan Messenger cargo shorts paired with his usual black combat boots. He looked how he normally did, but for some reason, Izzy found herself unable to tear her gaze from him as he walked to the armchair and sat down. His blue eyes stayed trained on her, and she had to avert her gaze to her chipped nail polish in order to stop the blush from blooming on her cheeks. She only hoped he didn't see the blush on her face. Hell, she didn't want to even acknowledge it. Because really, why the fuck was she blushing?

          The sound of a car pulling into the dirt driveway, snapped Izzy out of her trance, the flush on her cheeks disappearing as well. She glanced up to see a white Jeep Wrangler parked next to her Mercury Comet in front of the house. She knew who was behind the wheel, and her heart pounded at the thought. The uneasy feeling only deepened when she saw Kiara hop out of her car with her brows furrowed and a scowl written across her face.

          "She's so going to kill you," Pope remarked to John B, shaking his head as a small scoff escaped his lips. He approached the stool placed beside the armchair where JJ sat, and plopped down on the wooden surface, placing his feet on the footrest.

          John B tangled a hand in his brown curls. "Yeah, I know," he mumbled as he sat down next to Sarah on the sofa.

          Kiara trudged up the creaky stairs and swung the screen door open before she stormed onto the porch with her hands crossed over her chest. "No effing way!" she yelled as she glanced between the two blonde girls sitting on the sofa, then set her sights on John B. She narrowed her eyes into slits and clenched her jaw as she shook her head in disbelief. She didn't say another word; she only glared at the boy and leaned her back against a pillar and continued shooting daggers at him.

          JJ snorted. "JB, you're dead, man," he said as he rested his elbow on the arm of the chair then tugged at his bottom lip with his fingers.

          John B sent him a look and flipped him off. "Come on, Kie. Talk to me," he mumbled, trying to get through to the girl. But Kiara wasn't having it, and averted her gaze to the ground, keeping her mouth shut. That earned a scoff from the Routledge boy. "The silent treatment, really? At least, look at me, man."

          A muscle in Kiara's jaw twitched. "If I look at you, I'm going to fucking stab you," she spat as she shook her head and scoffed under her breath.

          "I'd pay to see that," JJ remarked.

          "I second that," Pope added, raising his hand.

          John B sent them a blank look. "You guys aren't helping."

          The two of them raised their hands in surrender and shrugged. Oddly enough, that made a small amused smirk stretch across Izzy's face. Maybe this was a good decision. Izzy's smile grew at the thought, but this time JJ caught sight of it. He grinned back at her and sent her a wink. The girl only rolled her eyes at him, but the smile remained on her face.

          Izzy turned her attention back to the scene in front of her and sighed. The silence was starting to suffocate her, and she hated that. "So what exactly is this?" she found herself asking, her voice breaking the brief moment of silence. "John B said something about an axe murderer but like what are the details?"

          Kiara scoffed and shook her head. "The fact you don't know means you should probably leave," she muttered bitterly. Her eyes snapped to meet Izzy's and she glared at the girl, looking her up and down as if she couldn't believe she was actually tangible.

          Izzy only stared back at her, but her eyes didn't narrow into slits. She understood why Kiara despised her, and she didn't blame her. Most of the time, Izzy hated herself too, so she didn't really expect other people to feel differently. She just expected it now. She expected people to hate her, and there wasn't really anything she could do about it.

          "My dad . . . " John B piped up, finding his voice. "He was trying to find the gold from the Royal Merchant and well . . . we found the gold. I think."

          Izzy shifted her gaze to his face and raised a brow. "You think?" she asked, her voice dripping with questioning. "You seemed pretty sure earlier."

          The Routledge boy opened his mouth to respond, but someone else beat him to it. "All right. All right. I'll give you the rundown, Princess," JJ abruptly blurted out, causing all eyes to fall on him. "Basically this dude. Denmark . . . uh . . . "

          Pope raised a finger in the air. "Denmark Tanny," he muttered in a monotone voice.

          JJ glanced at him and nodded once. "Right, I knew that," he said under his breath. He cleared his throat a second later and turned back to meet Izzy's gaze. "So this Denmark dude was a slave who survived the Royal Merchant wreck and he used his gold to buy a farm—"

          "Which is now Tannyhill," Pope cut in.

          JJ snapped his fingers at him. "Yeah that . . . and he made big bank, right?" he remarked before wetting his lips and inhaling sharply. "So that pissed people off . . . and right when they're about to lynch him, he writes this letter to his son telling him where the gold is and bam! Jackpot!"

          Izzy furrowed her brows and blinked. "So then where exactly is it? We don't have many axe murderers in town, so like . . "

          "Parcel nine," John B informed. His eyes drifted to Sarah's face and a warm smile spread across his lips. "And thanks to Sarah giving us the original survey map of the property we were able to check it out today."

          "Yeah, and just our luck, the damn gold is on the Crains' property," JJ scoffed as he shook his head and ran a hand through his blond hair.

          Izzy's brows shot up high on her forehead. "The Crains? As in Mrs. Crain, the lady who supposedly murdered her husband?" she asked as a small laugh bubbled in her throat. It wasn't that she found the situation funny, it was the fact that she had found herself in this stupid treasure hunt in the first place. Whatever. For once, she was trusting the universe. But it was seriously, testing her patience. "Well, this isn't what I expected, but, uh, I see what you meant by an axe murderer. Sounds so fun."

          JJ shot his hand out and pointed at Izzy. "See!" he exclaimed, glancing at his friends with his brows raised high on his forehead. "What did I tell you guys? It's true. Old lady Crain is batshit crazy."

          Izzy made a face. "Oh, no, it's total bullshit."

          A brief silence followed her words as JJ brought his hand back to his body and scratched his chin. He cleared his throat and muttered something under his breath along the lines of 'Yeah, I knew that', trying to play off his previous actions.

          "Way to go, dumbass," Pope snorted as he clapped a hand against JJ's back.

          Izzy furrowed her brows, her mind wandering as the seconds ticked by. She couldn't help but wonder if this was the reason John B wanted to meet Sarah at Midsummers. It seemed plausible. "So that's what the letter was about?" she voiced her thoughts, her curiosity consuming her. She flicked her eyes to Sarah's face. "You went to meet John B to give him the map?"

          "Who the fuck let her read the letter?" Kiara spat out before anyone else could answer. Her arms were still crossed over her chest as she took a step forward and glared at the group.

          JJ slowly raised his hand. "I might have given it to her to give to Sarah," he admitted, his voice hesitant. He glanced at Pope for support, but the Heyward boy only shook his head at him as he raised his hands.

          "Are you fucking kidding me?" Kiara bit out through gritted teeth. She shook her head at him, dragging her eyes over his face in disbelief. "I swear you don't have a brain."

          "Look, it doesn't matter now," JJ claimed, gesturing with his hands to emphasize his point. "She's already in on it. You're lucky it was just her who found out." He sunk back into the armchair and shrugged. "I'm surprised no one caught onto that stupid fake waiter shit JB made me pull at Midsummers."

          Pope scrunched his face and nodded. "Yeah, you'd think one of them would catch on," he agreed.

          JJ glanced at Pope and grinned slightly. "Maybe I'm just a good actor," he said, putting a hand on his chest.

          Pope shook his head. "You're a horrible actor," he muttered.

          The Maybank boy pointed his finger at his friend and opened his mouth to respond, but he never got the chance. "Wait . . . so you weren't actually a waiter?" Izzy abruptly asked, her eyes glued to JJ's face. She didn't mean to voice her thoughts, but her mind was wandering again. One second she was half-listening to the conversations in the room, the next she was wondering why JJ was at Midsummers if he wasn't even a waiter. She supposed she should pay more attention to who her father hired as staff.

          JJ turned his head, his gaze meeting hers. His eyes softened slightly before he brought a hand up to run a hand through his blond waves. "Uh . . . no," he muttered as he scratched the nape of his neck.

          Izzy narrowed her eyes and scrunched up her face. She was only more confused. "So then if you were there to give Sarah the message . . . why did you give it to me?"

          JJ blinked. "Uh . . . well . . . you're friends with Sarah so I thought it'd look less suspicious if you gave it to her," he claimed as he bit the inside of his cheek. "Plus, I was out there for too long. They were starting to suspect me. JB said to keep it incognito so I did the best I could."

          Pope snorted. "Nice one, casanova," he said, slapping the boy on the back. "Real believable."

          "What's he talking about?" Izzy demanded, her voice stern.

          "Whatever!" Kiara yelled, causing all eyes to fall on her. "You—" she shoved her finger at JJ— "let this bitch in on our secret."

          JJ made a face. "Uh, I did not," he scoffed. "That's all John B."

          Kiara rolled her eyes. "You gave her the damn letter."

          "She didn't know what it was about!" JJ defended, his voice abrupt as he gestured with his hands to emphasize his point.

          Kiara only shook her head. "The fact you don't see a problem in this, JJ, is really concerning."

          JJ fell back into the armchair, resting his elbow on the arm of the chair. "John B's the one who brought them here. You're targeting me. It doesn't seem fair," he muttered bitterly. "I think you're picking favorites."

          Kiara raised her brows. "Picking favorites? Are you kidding me?" she snapped, putting her hands on her hips. "You are a fucking idiot. You know why this is wrong. You of all people know why, JJ."

          "Look, I can go if it bothers you all that much," Izzy interrupted before anyone could burst a blood vessel. She honestly didn't think it would get this out of hand. Maybe it wasn't a sign. Maybe she had made the wrong decision. "I just thought if there is actually gold . . . well . . . I'm the only one with connections to get it cashed."

          Kiara's gaze snapped to Izzy, her eyes igniting with fire. "Leave," she spat through gritted teeth. "We don't need you."

          "Okay, let's think about this." John B said, stretching his arms out in front of him as if trying to break the tension suffocating them the room. "Izzy's the only one with connections. Her dad's job is literally revolved around money. If anyone can help us turn gold bars into hard cash, it's her . . . unless you know of someone else, Kie."

          "I don't know if I trust that," Pope piped up, raising a finger in the air. "Aren't you guys known for screwing people over?"

          "Exactly," Kiara agreed. "We can't trust either of them." She flicked her gaze back to Izzy, her eyes narrowing into slits. "Besides you're a billionaire. There's like two thousand of you in the world. You practically have cash growing on your damn trees. You don't need the fucking money."

          Izzy raised a brow. "And I don't want the money."

          A scoff escaped Kiara's lips. "Then why do you care?"

          Why did she care? Izzy didn't know. She just did. She didn't want to, but for some reason, a part of her felt like she needed to be in on this. "I'm just . . . bored," was what she said instead of blurting out the truth. She didn't quite understand the truth anyway.

          Kiara raised her brows. "Bored?" she questioned, a scoff following shortly after. "You're bored so you're going to scam us out of the money?"

          "No," Izzy spat. "Look, I thought I could be of some use. Like you said, I'm one in two thousand and I've got the connections to show for it." With that she pursed her lips and shrugged, awaiting her response.

          Kiara only shook her head, then scanned the rest of the group with her eyes. "So that's it? You're all okay with this?" she bitterly asked, slapping her hands against her thighs. "You're all okay with them being in on this?"

          "I dunno'," Pope muttered, shrugging his shoulders. "There's a lot of pros and cons here."

          "Look, Iz doesn't want a cut," JJ said, holding up his hand and gesturing to the girl. "All I care about is that Sarah's cut comes out of your—" he shoved a finger at John B— "share."

          "You know, I don't remember taking a vote," Kiara spat, flicking her eyes to John B. She leaned back against the pillar and latched her hands onto the railing, digging her nails into the wood. "This is our thing. A Pogue thing."

          "Yeah, I gotta say. I'm a tad uncomfortable with this," Pope admitted, his face twitching as he spoke. His voice was filled with an undertone of anger, probably because he didn't trust the two girls who had money practically growing on the cheery blossoms blooming on their estates.

          "Thank you," Kiara exclaimed.

          John B scoffed and shook his head. "When are you not uncomfortable?"

           "I dunno'," Pope retorted, his voice bitter and sharp. "I rode here on the back of JJ's bike pretty comfortably."

          JJ nodded his head. "It's true," he said as he flicked his eyes to meet John B's harsh gaze. "Most relaxed I've ever seen him."

          The Routledge boy averted his gaze, staring off into the distance. "That's cute guys," he muttered, setting his jaw.

          "You know we were all pretty comfortable until you brought them," Kiara snapped, shoving a hand out to gesture to the two girls.

          "Stop talking about us like we're not here," Sarah finally spoke up, her voice dripping with venom. "Izzy's already offered to help you. What more do you want?"

          "For you to leave," Kiara responded. "That's what I want."

          Sarah scoffed and rolled her eyes before she craned her neck to bring her eyes to John B's face. "I told you," she muttered through gritted teeth.

          "Told him what exactly?" Kiara asked, tilting her head. "That you're a liar?"

          "No, that you're a shit-talking bitch!" Sarah spat.

          The room fell silent, the air becoming thick and hard to breathe. Pope gaped at the two girls, and then glanced at JJ, giving him a wide-eyed look. JJ only responded by digging into his pocket and pulling out cash, betting on Kiara winning the fight. But their conversation was soon cut short by Kiara herself who stepped forward and flicked her eyes to Izzy. Her eyes narrowed into slits, but the pain and hurt could still be seen swirling in her deep pools of brown. This wasn't just about a stupid treasure hunt; the pained look on her face was enough to give that away.

          "And what about you, Izzy?" Kiara bit out, her voice barely above a whisper but still filled to the brim with venom. "What do you have to say about this? Or are you just going to ignore me like I don't even exist?"

          As those words left her lips, Izzy decided she definitely had made the wrong decision. This was not a sign; it was just another trick the universe forced upon her. She should have known better than to put her trust into something that had only chewed her up and spit her out like she meant nothing. "Okay, fuck this," Izzy muttered. "I don't want in on this if—"

          "You're already in it," Kiara cut her off. Her voice had begun to waver now, but she quickly cleared her throat and pursed her lips, masking the pain in her words. "And I'm curious about what you're going to do after this is over. Say if we let you come along and we do find the gold . . . then what? What happens when you're done using us? What happens when all our use is used up?"

          Izzy scoffed. She knew why Kiara was angry. Hell, she'd be pissed too, but Izzy was composed of iron and grit and fire. She was not meant to sit still, keeping her reactions to herself. She was born from flames, and the fire had begun to spread. "I don't want any of the gold, Kie," she spat, her voice bitter and harsh.

          "This isn't about the fucking gold!" Kiara yelled, her words causing the room to fall into silence. Tears welled in her eyes, but she wouldn't let them fall. It seemed no one noticed how her eyes glossed over, but Izzy saw. She saw and it made her heart swell in her chest.

          "Kie, she just wants to help," JJ abruptly muttered, breaking the silence suffocating the room. He briefly flicked his eyes to Izzy, and she stared back at him, her eyes slightly widening in shock.

          Kiara glanced between the two of them, and couldn't stop the scoff which fell from her lips. "You know why this is a bad idea, JJ," she said, her voice more stable, but still plagued with rage. "You know. I know you do."

          JJ turned his eyes back to Kiara, and wet his lips. "It's different now," was all he said.

          Kiara shook her head. "It's not, JJ! She's still the same person!" she yelled as she crossed her arms over her chest, her nails digging into her skin. They left small crescent moon indents when she released—a reminder of the scars her old friends left on her heart.

          "Everybody shut up!" John B abruptly yelled, causing all eyes to fall on him. He glanced at Kiara and sighed. "Kie, you're my best friend, right?" His eyes flicked to Izzy next and he made a face as if he were thinking about what words he wanted to utter. "Izzy, you're . . . useful?"

          Izzy blinked, and a scoff fell from her lips. "Uh . . . thanks?"

          The Routledge boy ignored her snarky remark and turned his gaze to Sarah. His eyes softened, and a small smile grew on his face when he looked at the girl. "And Sarah, you're my . . . " he trailed off and shrugged his shoulders, searching her eyes for approval.

          A small smile lifted onto Sarah's face. "Say it," she whispered as she put a hand on John B's leg and squeezed.

          "You're my girlfriend," John B said, the words lighting up his face as he smiled even wider.

          Izzy rolled her eyes. Jesus. She had to stop being so bitter but she couldn't help it. She just couldn't shake the feeling that the boy was using her friend, just like all her past boyfriends. Topper had been pretty bad, so at least he was out of the picture, but there wasn't much hope for Sarah's new apparent boyfriend. Men just sucked, and Izzy couldn't help but believe that John B wasn't any different. Sure . . . maybe that was more Izzy's issue, but still . . . she couldn't shake the feeling.

          "That's new," Pope commented after a moment of silence.

          "She's your girlfriend now?" Kiara scoffed as she glanced between the two teenagers and shook her head. "What was all that talk about you were just using her for information? Get a map, cut her loose."

          Something snapped deep inside of Izzy. She knew she had been right. "What the fuck is wrong with you?" she spat as she narrowed her eyes into slits at the Routledge boy.

          "Izzy," Sarah warned.

          "No," Izzy bit out. Her blood was boiling now, heating her skin. "What the fuck is wrong with you? And you people say we're fake. Fuck you."

          "Izzy," Sarah warned again, this time putting a hand on Izzy's arm and squeezing it in reassurance.

          Izzy only shook her head and sunk back into the sofa. Men were scum. All of Sarah's past boyfriends were pretty shit, too. And then, she was suddenly reminded that love didn't exist, and she agreed wholeheartedly. How could it exist when this was what women had to put up with? It was bullshit if you asked her.

          Sarah's hand slipped from around Izzy's arm, and she turned her attention back to her apparent boyfriend. "You said you were using me?" she asked, her voice soft and quiet.

          John B brought a hand up to scratch his forehead. "No," he said, but his voice fell flat, indicating that he was lying through his teeth.

          "Yeah, you did," Pope immediately added. JJ pursed his lips and nodded in agreement.

          "Okay, look, love just walked in, okay?" John B claimed, gesturing with his hands to emphasize his point.

          Izzy rolled her eyes but didn't say anything. Love . . . yeah, right, she bitterly thought.

          "Oh, vomit," Kiara scoffed as she rolled her eyes.

          "I didn't expect it," John B went on, his words turning into ramblings. "It just kind of happened." He flicked his eyes to Sarah, who only stared at him with a blank look. "I'm not going to deny it, right?"

          "Oh, that's corny," Pope muttered, laughing slightly.

          Izzy only rolled her eyes once again. She was so tired of this 'love' bullshit. And this 'trust the universe' shit was really biting her in the ass. She decided maybe she had been wrong. Maybe she should have just stayed home and painted on her walls until her hand ached. She scoffed at her thoughts and shook her head. She averted her gaze, glancing around the porch for a few seconds before her eyes landed on JJ, and she found he was already staring at her with an amused expression written across his face.

          When her eyes met his, the corners of his lips twitched into a half-smirk. He formed his hand into the shape of a gun and pressed it against his head, pretending to blow his brains out to express his irritation with the situation they were stuck in. He closed his eyes and slumped his head against the chair, acting as if he had died. Izzy only shook her head at him and rolled her eyes, but a small smile tugged at her lips. JJ opened his eyes to find Izzy still fighting a smile, which only seemed to amuse him more.

          "Look, cut the shit, John B," Kiara abruptly snapped, causing all eyes to fall on her once again. She glanced between the two blonde girls, a scoff leaving her lips a second later. "If they're in, I'm out."

          John B shook his head. "I need Sarah, okay?"

          "And I'm not doing this without Izzy," Sarah added, her voice sharp. Izzy's heart swelled in her chest at Sarah's words.

           Kiara rolled her eyes. "Yeah, of course, you aren't," she scoffed. "Where one bitch goes, the other follows. But I don't fucking care." She snapped her eyes to meet John B's gaze. "It's me or it's them."

          "I'm not doing this, Kie," John B claimed, sighing at her request.

          "You are gonna decide," the Carrera girl demanded.

           "I can't!"

          But Kiara didn't stop. "I'm very interested actually," she snapped, her voice raising an octave as she spoke. "Me or her?"

          John B shrugged. "Both."

          "Stupid," Pope commented.

          "Went for the hail mary," JJ added.

          Kiara only scoffed, ignoring the two boys making comments toward the argument. "You're not even going to cut Izzy?" she asked, her voice softer now. It was almost as if she couldn't believe the scene happening before her . . . like it was all just some sick joke.

          Something flashed in John B's eyes as he tugged a hand through his brown curls, and then he released a sigh. "Sarah needs her . . . and I need Sarah."

          "Oh, you need her, do you?" Kiara muttered. She raised her brows high on her forehead and shook her head in disbelief. "What are you? Her bitch?"

          "Kie, come on," John B pleaded, his voice softer now.

          But Kiara wasn't having it. She shook her head one more time at the boy then pursed her lips and shoved herself off the railing. "Fuck you, John," she spat through gritted teeth. She turned around and swung open the screen door, trudging down the steps and heading toward her car. She slid into her Jeep and started the engine, pulling out of the dirt driveway and driving onto the road. Then she was gone, leaving the others to sit in the silence.

          "It'll be cool, right?" Sarah finally uttered as she glanced at her boyfriend with a look in her eye. "I'm gonna leave." A sigh escaped her lips and she stood to her feet, smoothing out her dress. "Gonna let y'all chat. Let me know."

          "Sarah . . . " John B trailed off, pleading with his eyes.

          Sarah only shook her head. Then, her eyes flicked to Izzy and she pursed her lips. "Iz, you coming?" she asked.

          Izzy began to nod her head, but she stopped when she realized what she had wanted to do that day. She originally was going to talk with Sarah about her new relationship status, and then she was going to visit her mother's grave. Maybe she had purposefully forgotten about her decision. Maybe she was just scared to go to the graveyard, but she couldn't let that stop her. This was her mother, and she had already put it off for a while now. She had to face her ghost.

          "Actually," Izzy finally muttered, "I have to do something but I'll meet you later."

          Sarah nodded then disappeared around the corner, leaving the Windsor girl with the boys. But she didn't stay long. Soon, Izzy gave the boys a tight-lipped smile then stood to her feet and opened the screen door. She walked down the steps and onto the dirt pathway, her Birkenstocks smacking the ground as she began to make her way to her car. But before she could advance, someone stopped her.

          "Iz, hey, wait up," someone called out from behind her, causing her to stop in her walk to her convertible.

          Izzy furrowed her brows and glanced over her shoulder to see JJ Maybank jogging down the steps, and heading toward her. Her brows pinched together and she tilted her head to the side as she slowly turned around. "Hey?" she mumbled, but it came out more like a question.

          A half-grin slid onto JJ's face as he approached her with his hands in the pockets of his cargo shorts. "Uh—" he wet his lips and breathed out through his nose— "where are you . . . where are you going?"

          Why did he want to know? Izzy wasn't used to people caring. She wasn't even sure if he did care, but it still confused her and had her wondering whether or not she should tell him where she was heading. She bit her lip in contemplation before she released a sigh. Fuck it, she decided. "I'm going to visit my mom," she confessed as her gaze drifted down to her hands and she began picking at her chipped nail polish. She really needed a manicure, but whatever. "I haven't been since . . . you know . . . it happened."

           JJ reached out to graze her arm with his knuckles, rubbing her skin to grasp her attention. She glanced up and met his gaze, and then the twine was back, slowly releasing her heart from its grip as warmth spread throughout her chest. She searched his blue eyes for answers she didn't even know she had questions for, but before she could let her mind wander further, he quickly stopped her.

          "I can come with you if you want," the Maybank boy suggested, his voice soft and quiet almost as if he were afraid to speak the words into the universe. "Or not. I could just walk you to your car."

          Izzy furrowed her brows. Her car was only a little way down the dirt driveway. It wasn't much of a walk. Why would he want to do that? She quickly shook her head and decided she didn't want to get lost in a sea of 'what ifs' so she cleared her throat and shot him a questioning look. "Don't you have shit to figure out? Like getting Kie on board?" she asked. At that point, she felt like she was just grasping at straws to find something to say.

          JJ shrugged. "John B's got that handled," he said. "Besides, he's got Pope." He brought a hand to his hair, sifting through the blond waves, and only then did Izzy notice the cuts on his face. She had almost forgotten he had gotten into a fight with someone that he refused to tell her about. She wondered who had done that to him, and then she decided if she ever found out, she'd have them fired from whatever job they had. (She was almost certain it was a cop who had done that to him, despite him denying the idea. And if she found out it was a cop, she would still have them fired. People like that didn't deserve to be in power.)

          As those thoughts resurfaced in her mind, a fire in her veins coursed throughout her body. But she wouldn't let it spread. She quickly extinguished the flames and found herself searching for JJ's eyes. When blue met green, the wildfire was nothing more than a small candle flame. "Okay . . . sure, you can come," she sighed, "but . . . only to the car."

          JJ clicked his tongue. "Damn, but the graveyard's one of my favorite places, honestly," he joked, a small smirk crawling onto his face. He took one look at Izzy's unamused expression, and let out this laugh. "I'm kidding. Dead people are more Pope's thing anyway."

          "Right," Izzy muttered. She shot him one last look before she turned around and began walking toward her car with JJ trailing beside her. She wet her lips and glanced at him out of the corner of her eyes. "So any idea on how you're going to get Kie to come around?"

          JJ shrugged and kicked a rock in his path. "No clue," he said, his voice soft. "I mean we need Kie, you know? But . . . you guys do bring something to the table. Well, you do."

          Izzy gave a dry laugh, although it sounded more like a scoff. "Perks of being related to a Billionaire," she muttered. The word billionaire left a bad taste in her mouth. She wasn't sure why. Maybe it had to do with the fact that she was helping a group of teens trying to uncover a bunch of gold that would solve all their problems when she could have just given them all enough money to last a lifetime with just one check. But she couldn't do that . . . not really. Her dad wouldn't have it. And it always came down to her father and his restrictions.

          "Aren't you like worth a million bucks or something though?" JJ abruptly asked, tearing Izzy from her thoughts.

           A heavy sigh escaped her lips as she approached her convertible and placed a hand on the handle. But she didn't pull to open the door, instead, she let her hand slip from the handle and she turned around to face the boy. "Yeah, I guess I sort of am . . . but it's only because of my dad," she admitted as she leaned against the side of the convertible. "It's like inheritance or some shit. I mean I guess it is. I don't really know the details. I don't really care."

          "Huh . . . " JJ trailed off as he leaned against her convertible. His arm was almost grazing Izzy's, and she could feel the heat from his body radiating onto hers, which made her heart pound in her chest. She ignored the feeling and listened to his voice as he began to speak again. "So technically I'm friends with a celebrity."

          Izzy's brows pinched together and she released a small scoff. "Uh, hell no," she muttered, her voice surprisingly bitter. "Nobody knows who I am. The only reason I'm searchable on the internet is because of my dad. No one cares. Sure, there's a lot of people on my Instagram but you don't see the paparazzi hounding me down. There's no difference between me and all the other Instagram models. No one would recognize me if I was walking down the street. I'm just another photoshopped body to them."

          "I don't know. I think I'd recognize you," JJ mumbled, his voice like honey and silk. It was comforting. "You're kind of hard to forget."

          The twine wrapped around her heart had disintegrated and been replaced with this warmth. Izzy swallowed hard and slowly turned her head, lifting her gaze to find his eyes . . . only he was already staring at her. Heat instantly spread across her cheeks.

          Izzy averted her gaze and brought her hand to her face, trying to mask her rosy cheeks. "Um, so—" she inhaled sharply and cleared her throat— "why did you really give me the letter?" Jesus Christ, why did she ask that of all things? She was honestly digging herself her own grave at this point. It was pathetic . . . almost laughable.

          "I told you it was easier," JJ explained, but his voice fell flat. He was lying. Izzy knew he had been the first time he tried to explain himself, and she was determined to discover the truth. Plus, she had already made a fool of herself for even asking that question in the first place, so she couldn't just leave it. She had to know the truth.

          "Cut the bullshit, JJ," Izzy bluntly ordered. "I can tell when people are lying." She glanced his way again, but he wasn't looking at her this time.

          JJ had his brows furrowed low on his face and his eyes trained on the ground below his feet. For a second she thought he might try to lie again or just get up and walk away. But he did something that surprised her more. He spoke the truth. "I guess I wanted to get you involved," he muttered, his voice barely above a whisper.

          Okay, sure, he had told the truth . . . sort of, but it didn't make much sense. If anything it just felt like a sick joke, and Izzy was at the brunt of it.

          "Why?" Izzy found herself asking.

          JJ shrugged. "I don't know," he breathed out as he turned his head to meet Izzy's gaze. Only then did he look at her . . . like . . . really look at her. He looked into her eyes, and suddenly it was like he could see her . . . the real her. And then he gave her a small smile. "I just . . . I think you're cool. I guess I wanted to see more of you . . . maybe? I don't know if that makes sense but . . . "

          Confusion hit Izzy like a slap in the face. Sure, she had a knack for finding the meaning behind songs, but she was hopeless when it came to figuring out people. She thought she could read people easily, but JJ was different. She never knew what he was thinking, and maybe that had more to do with her than with him. But she did know that he thought she was cool. Cool. Izzy Windsor was cool in JJ's eyes, and that confused her more than she wanted it to.

          "What happened to you hating me?" Izzy blurted out, finally finding her voice. "You quote-on-quote said 'the feeling was mutual' so . . . you know." She just couldn't believe that the boy who had claimed he hated her since the eighth grade all of a sudden thought she was cool. Sure, they had technically already decided they were sort of friends now, but that didn't mean anything. People changed their minds all the time, especially when it came to being anyone in Izzy Windsor's life. Who was to say he wouldn't leave too? Everyone else had.

          "I never hated you, Iz," JJ sighed as he gently shook his head. "Not even close."

          Izzy slightly tilted her head to the side and searched his face with her eyes. "So we're friends? Like actually? Like you mean that?" she asked, her voice soft like silk.

          The corners of JJ's lips twitched. "Yeah, why else would I say it?"

          Izzy shrugged. "Ulterior motive maybe."

          "There's no ulterior motive," JJ murmured as he nudged Izzy with his elbow. "I just . . . I guess a part of me wanted you to find out about this shit, and you did, so . . . "

          Izzy squinted her eyes at him. "I have a feeling you're all going to lure me in and sacrifice me to some god," she muttered as she crossed her arms over her chest.

          JJ let out this laugh. "Didn't think of that, but good point," he remarked as he nodded his head. "I'll take it up with the others."

          "Mmm, thank you so much." Izzy hummed, her voice dripping with sarcasm. She rolled her eyes, but she couldn't help the small smile which formed on her face. "Can you like keep it PG though? I've just always wanted an open casket, you know?"

          JJ nodded and tried to cover his amused grin, but it seeped through. "Understandable," he said. "I'll make sure it's one and done. Now, Pope might get a little handsy but that's just because the kid's gonna' be a mortician, so don't worry. Oh, and we could have you stuffed like they do with animals and shit. Could be fun, huh? You could be like one of those modern mummies."

          Izzy didn't utter another word, she only looked at him with an amused grin on her face. She didn't know what had overcome her, but one moment she was just sitting there, feeling like how she normally felt, and then there was this warmth spreading through her veins. It left her feeling overwhelmed as a laugh bubbled in her chest. She didn't even try to suppress it as it bubbled from her lips and consumed her. She had to clamp a hand down over her mouth to contain the laughter, but still, she didn't stop.

          And as Izzy continued to laugh, she began to feel like she was that thirteen-year-old girl again, laughing as she ran across her private beach with JJ chasing after her. That was three years ago now. Three years ago, Izzy liked JJ. She liked him maybe a little more than she should have. And then she remembered how she had kissed him all those years ago, and he had kissed her back. But that was before; before all Hell broke loose, and Izzy became this.

          Now, they were finally friends again. They were just friends, and they wouldn't be anything more. Besides, Izzy didn't want them to be anything more than that. She liked him three years ago, but she didn't like him now. It was too late now.

          Once Izzy's laughter had died down, a grin spread across JJ's face. "It's nice to hear you laugh," he commented, his voice sweet. He was sweet. Maybe he always had been.

          It was too late now, Izzy reminded herself. They couldn't be anything more than friends, and she didn't want them to be. She forced that thought into her brain and forced herself to meet his eyes. "Don't get used to it," was all she muttered. She was too wrapped up in her own thoughts to come up with a better response.

          "Wouldn't dream of it," JJ said as he pushed off the convertible and stood to his feet, walking to stand in front of Izzy. Izzy immediately straightened her posture but kept her arms crossed over her chest as she watched him. He didn't seem fazed by her actions; he only glanced from her face then his eyes drifted to her hair and the corners of his lips twitched. "Your hair looks nice by the way."

          Izzy immediately blushed. "Oh, thanks," she mumbled as she brought a hand up to comb through her now short bleach-blonde hair. "I cut it earlier today after I broke up with Rafe. I figured I needed a change. I'm, um, letting things go . . . I guess."

          Something flashed in JJ's eyes, and his mouth fell slightly agape. "You broke up with Rafe?" he asked, his voice strained.

          Fuck. Did she just tell him that? Izzy shoved off her shock from her own words, and tried to play it off like breaking up with her long-term boyfriend wasn't a big deal. "Yeah? Why?" she questioned.

          JJ searched Izzy's eyes for a moment too long. It seemed he was at war with himself, trying to decide his next words carefully or maybe he was trying to figure out if he was stuck in a dream. Either way, he blinked a second later and cleared his throat before a small (almost smug?) smile tugged at his lips. "Don't worry about it," he ended up muttering. "Um, I'll let you get back to what you were going to do. But, uh, I'll be seeing you, all right, Princess?" He squeezed her arm before he gave her a fleeting grin and turned around, heading toward the house.

          "I'll be seeing you," Izzy whispered, her voice too quiet to be heard by the boy who was already walking away from her. She didn't know why the twine tightened around her heart, tugging harder the more JJ distanced from her. She just didn't know. She wasn't sure if she wanted to discover the meaning behind it or the reason why she couldn't seem to stop blushing when JJ would wink at her and call her that ridiculous nickname.

          But as Izzy watched the boy retreat back to the porch, she only knew of one thing for certain. She was sure JJ Maybank was the type of person to listen to a song on repeat, trying to analyze the meaning behind it. His persistence to break down the walls she had put up was enough to show for that. And oddly enough, that didn't make Izzy feel uncomfortable. If anything, it made her feel less alone.

a/n: i don't know if it's obvious or not because me & writing aren't making sense right now, but kie is not so subtly telling izzy that jj likes her. like??? nobody hate on my baby gal, she's just trying to protect jj from getting his heart broken again, but we all know izzy would never do that to him. sorry to tell you, iz, but you're whipped. the end.

also, the next chapter is one of my faves for izzy & kie. not to be gay on main, but #kizzy rights.

thanks for reading!