Chapter 83 ~ Twin Flame
The sun sets again, the tiny window in her room providing the only piece of humanity in the cell-like structure. Machines beep in time to the rhythm of her heartbeat, the sound of air whooshing through tubes into her body. The scent of flowers mixes with the chemicals coating the walls like a toxic slime, blossoms of all colours stand by her bedside. The days have passed like years this whole week, wondering if there will be another breath after the last. No one's left the hospital, they go home to sleep and wash but no one has been back to school, they can't bear to walk the halls without her. Vixxie snores quietly in Brady's lap, neither of them even go home to sleep, they stay here with me watching her pale blue gown move up and down.
"Thank you." The first words that leave my lips in days, my throat is so dry they croak.
Brady's eyes move to meet mine, black lines his undereye. "For what?"
"Just being here B, I appreciate it and I know she does. I appreciate all of you being here." Her hand is cold in mine resting on the bed, I've tried my hardest to remove the blood and mud from beneath her cracked nails but it's like a brand that's been imprinted into her skin.
"We're a family Blaze." He smiles. "No matter where we go or what we do in life, we will always have each other."
"You know I love you B-" A shrill beeping pierces the air, all of us turn to look at the machines, lines going haywire on the screen. Atlas's body convulses on the bed.
"Atlas! Atlas!" I squeeze her hand and lean over her, VJ runs out into the hall screaming for some help. She starts coughing, gasping for any kind of air. "Atlas breathe, open your eyes." Nurses and doctors come running into the room, throwing me and Brady back as they prod and poke at the wires. Tears run down VJ's face, she's screaming at them to tell us what's going on. I can't speak as I watch them surround her. One of her doctors kicks us out of the room when VJ gets too hysteric.
We wait outside her room, doctors coming in and out, Vixxie clutches to my side, tears soaking my hoodie. After what feels like hours, a nurse walks out of the doors straight for us. I can't read the lines on her face, my heart stops and a cold chill sweeps through my jarred bones. The collective silence is deafening.
"She's awake." The words hit me like bullets, the cold settling deep in my bones, "She reacted like that because of the tubes helping her breathe, her body was rejecting them as she came around and she started breathing on her own."
"Can we see her?" I demand.
"One at a time, she's extremely weak and is still recovering from her injuries. She may also be a bit confused but it seems like her brain function is normal, we still have tests to do to determine if there is any lasting damage but," The nurse pauses and smiles, "We don't usually see people go through this level of trauma and blood loss and wake up. She's a strong girl."
That she is. A cat with nine lives my girl.
"You go in first Blaze," VJ says, wiping under her hopeful eyes. I don't even fight them and follow the nurse into the room, only minutes ago these four walls felt like a prison cell, leached of life, now the flowers feel like they've bloomed, and the remaining bit of sunlight skitters like a golden glow across the bed and I can taste the life born again in the air. My eyes close in on the girl sitting on the bed, she's sitting up, propped by pillows. Wires are still plugged into her skin but not as many, her skin is still mottled by bruises but the colours have dimmed a bit this past week. Her stitches aren't as stark against her skin and she has a splint on her arm. I move closer towards the bed, and her eyes follow mine, crystal clear and alert.
"Atlas..." my heart pounded against my chest, I've never been so nervous. Her brows pinch together and she swallows audibly.
"Do... uh... do I know you?" Her voice is quiet, scratchy. An unsharpened knife is plunged into me. My muscles slacken and I almost fall to the floor, my eyes fill and blur.
"Joke. Hey, Quarterback." And just like that my whole body gives out, I fall onto the bed beside her and sob, her hands squeeze my shoulders, "Blaze. Shit, sorry, I'm sorry. I was just trying to lighten the mood." I lift my head, and cup her cheeks carefully.
"You... oh butterfly, I..."
"Hey, it's okay. It's okay. I'm fine. I'm sorry." She pushes her forehead to mine, wincing as she does.
"Don't do that again." I chuckle through my tears. "Oh Butterfly, I'm so sorry. I'm so so sorry. I-"
"Blaze stop. What are you talking about?" Her hand rests on my chest where my heart beats, trying to return to a normal pace. "Come here, sit with me." She wiggles over, grunting then pats the bed beside her. I move onto the bed next to her leaving a considerable gap, "Blaze, come closer. I won't break." I eye her and refuse to move closer. "Fine, you lump of lard." She starts to move.
"Stop. Fine." She grins smugly as I nestle closer to her and she rests her head on my chest. I close my arms around her and breathe her in, revelling in the warmth that fills me. It's been too long since I've held her like this. Every cell in me is alight and jumping, buzzing under my skin. The void inside me, gaping into a dark hole is filling ever so slowly.
"Firstly, I don't want to hear any apologies. This was in no way your fault, it was all... him and..." She pauses to look up at me, calculating what to say with her brows pinched. "Blaze do you know anything about what he wanted?" I turn to look at her confused. I shake my head. "I mean other than wanting me... dead." Pain laces through me at her words. She must see as she grips my hand with her non-injured one and squeezes. "Okay, well... I'll tell you but before that, I just... I have to tell you what I've been wanting to for ages or I will actually burst." She takes a big breath and her features soften as she rests her splinted hand on my cheek, moving her thumb backwards and forwards slowly. "I just want to say... I love you. I love you so much and what I wanted to tell you that night was... I can't live without you Blaze. I was never going to just walk away from all this. It's you and it'll always be you. I don't want to be apart anymore and if you'll take me, I want to come back. We can work this out and we both have things to work on but I trust you more than anything, I never didn't trust you and that night taught me that I need to trust myself and start living for me, feeling good about myself. I love you quarterback."
"I would have fought you anyway if you'd left," I mumble.
"No, you wouldn't have, because you trust my judgement and I need to start doing that." I place a kiss on her forehead, just below the stitches. "So can I come back?"
"You never left, not really." She moves in closer and I pull the covers up around us, "I love you. We'll get through all the shit because sometimes it's okay to be selfish and put ourselves before anything else. When you left I couldn't bear thinking about a life without you. We might be young and this is fucking corny but I think everyone has a twin flame bullshit and you're mine. You're my person. I'm sorry butterfly-"
"No, none of that Blaze. We're both victims in this and he... has anyone found him?" She peers up at me, her long lashes floating across her cheeks.
"No, not yet but they will and you are safe sweetheart." She takes a moment then nods at me.
"We'll work on all this. We'll talk through decisions and be happy for ourselves and each other no matter what. As you said you're my 'twin flame bullshit'." She snickers, pinching my cheek which turns into a yawn and winces, the pressure against her ribs causing havoc. "I need to tell you what happened. It's deeper than you think but please don't get angry..."
It's so crazy to think this is nearly done :( my next project is in the works so keep your eyes peeled ;) maybe include something along the F1 theme :)
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