"Isn't it bad to celebrate being clean by going out for drinks on a Saturday night?"

"Well, you're going to be with me," I mumbled as I walked behind her and wrapped my arms around her waist.

Yes, we were planning to have a night out to celebrate my new healthy life with my brother, Joe, who has just arrived earlier in the day.

"I don't mean that like I'm relying on you to keep an eye on me. I just mean because you're going to be with me I'm not going to be a fuckwit. I only want one drink, for a toast, I'm going to make... maybe... but that's it."

"No, I understand, I know what you mean." Mel smiled as she finished clipping on her earrings.

"Oi, oi we ready guys?" Joe stuck his head into my room.

Joe was younger than me by two years, and to be honest he looked pretty similar to me. When we were growing up, people had trouble trying to tell us apart. As we got older the similarities faded, he was a bit more tanned than me, but in saying that most people were as I hardly went out in the sun.

It was our last night in Indiana as I was planning to head back to L.A. the next morning, to start recording the new album with the guys. It was going to be our celebration/family/fun mixed night with my bro and the woman I loved. My idea of perfect company...

We went to the Black Sparrow, a bar I always wanted to go into when I was a wee one. It was a super trendy bar inside; fairy lights lined the ceiling and the walls were plastered with every type of lamp you could imagine. Sure the drinks were overpriced, but the aesthetics were worth it. Mel was standing at the bar waiting to be served, while me and Joe were chilling at our table. I marveled at Mel, staring at her legs in her tight jeans, which made her arse look amazing. I must have been checking her out for longer than I realised, as Joe had started to click his fingers in my face.

"Hey, dumbarse, you in there?"

I blinked and focused my eyes at my brother.

"Man, you are in love aren't you?" he grinned at me.

"Fucking oath I am, look at her! She's a total babe!"

"You're a pussy." He laughed at me.

"Says the one who got married at 26! You're the pussy."

Mel sauntered towards us, carrying three bottles of beer like a pro. The mood lighting inside the bar complimented her complexion, and it almost looked like she was glowing like a goddess. I had to restrain my urges, as I literally wanted to take her in front of everyone in the room. She and Joe had already had a few drinks already; the beer that Mel was getting ready to pass to me was going to be my only one for the night.

"Righto Izzy, we're ready for your special beer toast now." Mel smiled as she clinked her beer to mine.

"Hush down my peasants," I joked, "okay but seriously... I want to take this moment to thank the both of you, for..."

I took a deep breath. Talking personally was still a challenge for me, but I tried to tell myself I was in a "safe space". It was only my girl and my younger brother, but still, it was slightly embarrassing for me to be so open and truthful.

"... For being there for me recently. I know I haven't been the best person lately, but I'm going to change that. I promise I'll be a better older brother, and I promise I'm going to be a better boyfriend." I quickly smiled at Mel.

"Okay I'm done, thanks, guys."

We had our cheers, touched our bottles together and took a swig. Fuck I didn't realise how disgusting beer actually was since I was clearheaded and clean. I reluctantly swallowed my sip and screwed up my nose.

"Christ, how was I ever able to drink this shit?" I coughed, pushing the bottle away from me, "I think I need some cocaine to help wash that shit down."

The two looked at me like awkward cows.

"I'm kidding, guys."

They both looked so relieved. I thought I was absolutely hilarious, but obviously, that joke was too close to the bone at the time. Mel smiled with an embarrassed expression as she took another swig from her bottle. We sat there in comfortable silence for a while, taking in the details of the décor of the trendy bar. Soon, the conversation started again, mainly just talking shit about Joe's childhood and mine. I told Mel about all the cruel older brother pranks I used to pull on Joe and Tim, as well as informing her about the sick tricks I used to be able to do on a skateboard.

"You rode the skateboard?" She laughed.

"Yeah, man! I was a fucking legend on that thing. I've probably got pictures of myself doing sick flips somewhere at home. It was so worth all of the broken bones."

"Ha! Fuck I forgot about your injuries!" Joe chimed in. "I remember when you broke your collar bone, and you had an itchy nose." He continued trying to stifle his laughter.

I just groaned and shook my head.

"Why, what happened? What did you do?" Mel asked looking at the both of us.

"Whenever mum wasn't looking, I used to do gross things to Jeff. Since he wasn't allowed move his arms when his collar bone was fucked, whenever he'd tell me his nose was itchy or some shit like that, I used to scratch my arse first then shove it up Jeff's nose."

Mel couldn't control her laughter.

"You were such a prick brother." I laughed, punching his arm.

"Hey, it's what made us so close as brothers." Joe shrugged.

It was so much fun, reminiscing about the innocent times I had when I was younger. Deep in the back of my thoughts, I was really regretting my turn to the rebellious side of the rock and roll cliché. Why couldn't I have just appreciated the music, and not been such a fuckwit? Why wasn't I boring... like Mel's 'boyfriend' Jon Bon Jovi? That guy used to be such a noob in my eyes, but I had realised he was actually being pretty smart. He did his job without being dumb. While Joe continued talking to Mel about our brotherly moments, I became lost in her eyes. I had missed her smile so much.

"Oh, I love this song!" Mel yelled. The alcohol she had consumed was starting to show.

I was so out of the moment, I hadn't realised one of my most detested songs has started to play overhead.

Poor old Johnny Ray screeched through the speakers and I cringed.

"Come on and dance with me, Izzy!" Mel begged as she tugged at my jacket.

"No..." I whinged like a toddler, but it was so hard to say no to her.

Joe was trying hard to hide his amusement.

"Go on, dance with your girl!"

I don't know why I was so embarrassed, no one in the bar knew who I was. I suppose it was quite a strange experience. Everyone around me was tipsy or heavily intoxicated and I for once was the only sober person.

Mel grabbed my hands and pulled me to a small clearing, which was an attempted spot to be a dance floor. Joe raised his beer and whooped at me, I rolled my eyes and Mel hauled me into her body; her arms found their way around my waist. She looked up at me with a gooey look.

"Come on Eileen!" Mel screamed... in such perfect tune...

"Am I Eileen?" I asked, laughing at her being a total dork.

"Obviously! You in that dress, my thoughts I confess, verge on DIRTY!" She continued to scream as she attempted to make both of us sway to the beat.

As I stared down at Mel, who was obviously very tipsy, I was totally lost in the moment. Watching her have fun while being in my arms made me feel numb with happiness. I realised I had never needed drugs or alcohol to have fun, I just needed Mel. It was at that moment I knew I wanted to be with her for the rest of my life.

I wanted to marry her. 

~

Hope you enjoyed guys ;) let me know what you thought!

xx