"it's not always easy, but somehow our love stays strong. if i can make you happy then, this is where i belong"

perfect for me- ron pope

~YOONGI'S POV~

Just you, Yoongi, and Stevens sat in Youth & Impulse later that night, following the after party that included all BigHit staff and the Bangtan members. Now, the three of you were celebrating and reminiscing on your own, over cups of coffee in the place that meant the most to all of you.

A lot of sappy memories and thoughts were exchanged; You telling Yoongi how truly fascinated you were by him when he first walked into Youth & Impulse all of those months ago. Stevens telling Yoongi how impressed he was by his initial talent and skill. Yoongi sharing how much of a play Youth & Impulse had in changing his life completely.

Yoongi felt warm and elated that night while being in the close presence of two people he now considered family. He loved the feeling of sharing uninterrupted quality time with the both of you, spending hours talking about everything and nothing all at the same time.

But, there was a negative feeling that was creeping out of the corners of his heart, nagging at his mind without warning. He remembered that in just one week, he'd be leaving for two whole months on Bangtan's first tour. In just a week, he'd have to say goodbye to you for the most extended period of time that he ever had, and that was a tough pill to swallow.

"Are you tired, Yoon?" you asked in between sips of your caramel macchiato, seemingly taking notice of his change in demeanor, or perhaps the blatant dark circles under his eyes.

"I am, but I don't think I would be able to sleep right now. I still feel like I have performer's high," he chuckled, not willing to admit the sadness that had settled in his heart. He instead took a drink of the vanilla latte he had convinced you to make for him; it'd been too long since he'd last been allowed to have one.

"You must be exhausted; it's been a really long day," Stevens chimed in from across the table before becoming momentarily distracted by a notification from his phone.

"Yeah, but I'm really happy with how things went tonight. Thanks for coming back there and telling me to calm down," Yoongi tossed you a smile. He could barely even begin to describe in words how thankful he was for everything he had accomplished, and for everything that he had; it all almost felt surreal. He owed so much to every single person who had taken a chance on him, every single person who had believed in him. Because without those people, he knew he never would've made it this far.

"What else are girlfriends for?" you smiled back at him, the two of you holding a rather flirtatiously long period of eye contact. Yoongi was the first to snap out of it upon remembering that your uncle was sitting less than two feet away. Fortunately, Stevens hadn't been looking. He was still absorbed in his phone, smiling, and seemingly texting somebody.

Yoongi looked back to you, raising a suspicious eyebrow while you leaned closer to Stevens, trying to see what was on the screen of his phone. Yoongi could tell you were straining, but your efforts were rendered unsuccessful. So, Yoongi, as silently as he could manage, rose from his chair and made his way to Stevens, peering over his shoulder. Your hands were covering your mouth, biting back a laugh at how completely obliviously Stevens was to the situation.

It took him longer than it probably should've to notice Yoongi hovering over his shoulder, causing Stevens to jolt, his phone flying out of his hands and landing screen-down the floor.

"Really?" he let out an exasperated sigh, clearly irritated and shocked all at the same time. Yoongi jumped into action, picking the phone up off the ground. Although, he was too scared to flip it over and assess the damage.

"I just bought that," Stevens cried, accepting the phone back from Yoongi and turning it over. Luckily, there was only a tiny scratch on the screen, one that was barely even noticeable. Stevens sighed in relief, before unlocking his phone and returning to texting at an insanely rapid pace.

"Um, Stevens?" you questioned, standing to peer over his shoulder as Yoongi had been.

"What?" he replied without lifting his eyes from his phone.

"What's with the rapid texting?"

Stevens was quiet for a moment as he appeared to be contemplating something. He then set his phone down. "Sorry I got distracted."

"We don't mind. I think we're more curious about who it is that you're texting," Yoongi chuckled, sitting back down in his chair.

"What Yoongi said," you agreed, sitting back down as well.

"It's um...Patsy."

"Catfish Patsy?"

"How many times do I have to tell you that she was not a catfish. We've been dating in person for just about as long as you've been seeing Yoongi," Stevens complained at your persistence with that joke, even though he knew that you were kidding.

"You must really like her, Stevens," Yoongi smiled, shifting the conversation to a lighter tone before you and Stevens started arguing again over online dating.

"Honestly, yeah...I really do like her," Stevens admitted, almost seeming shy about the entire ordeal.

"Do you love her?" You grinned, leaning forward as if you were ready to hear some good gossip.

"Do you?" Yoongi egged Stevens on, partially because it was fun to tease him, but also because he was genuinely curious. This conversation the three of you were having reminded Yoongi a lot of a conversation he had with Jae many months ago...

"Yes," Stevens didn't hesitate on his response, eliciting an eruption of cheering from both you and Yoongi.

"Stevens is in looooooveeeeee," you said in a sing-songy voice, jumping up out of your chair and shaking his shoulders.

"STEVENS IS IN LOVE!" Yoongi shouted through his laughter, joining you in teasing and dancing around Stevens.

He had the best time with the three of you that night, a night so good he knew he would remember it for many months to come. It would be a memory that he would hold onto while away from you both, causing him happiness that it happened, but heartache that it was in the past.

Because yet again, things were changing with time.

|||||

ONE WEEK LATER

"It's not for forever, you know?" he reminded you as he held your hand. The two of you were standing in the doorway of your apartment, beginning the journey that was saying goodbye. You were both in broad daylight, and he only hoped that for once, no fans, or reporters, or random people would interrupt. He not only wanted this last chunk of time with you, but he needed it.

"I know," you confirmed, your eyes trained on the ground below you. You weren't throwing a fit. You weren't crying. You weren't begging him to stay. But, you were sad, and that was clear. It pulled and tugged on Yoongi's heart, bothering him more than he was willing to admit aloud.

"I'll call every morning. Night too. I promise," he added, even though he had told you all these things before.

"I know," you confirmed again.

"It's only two months; 8 weeks. It'll go by faster than you think."

"I know," you said for the last time, finally looking up to make eye contact with him. "You don't have to convince me that everything is going to be okay; I know it is."

Yoongi nodded, "I just want to be clear with everything. I don't want you to worry or to feel insecure while I'm gone," he said, his voice and body language giving how uneasy he truly felt about touring for two months. It had been proven repeatedly that distance and miscommunication were bad for the relationship, but you both were now being put in a position where that didn't really matter. He was going to have to leave anyway, whether he liked it or not. And neither of you could really complain because you'd both known all along what you were signing up for, what you were getting into.

"I'm not going to worry, Yoon. You shouldn't either. I'm confident in us, and I'm confident that we're going to be just fine after this," You were the one reassuring him this time, and you were words were enough to put some of his anxiety at ease.

Yoongi sighed then, quickly slipping his phone out of his pocket to check the time. "I need to go."

He watched as your face fell, but you didn't say anything other than, "Okay."

Yoongi put his phone, hesitating on how to approach the next few moments. Was it a bad idea to say goodbye quickly and leave before it became too difficult? Before he lost the will to leave at all? Or was it a bad idea to not linger for a moment, perhaps causing him to regret not staying longer down the line. Would it be better to kiss you quickly? Or to draw it out, giving you both something to hold onto? He wasn't sure, and those swirling considerations made the entire moment more difficult than it already was.

In a way, you almost made the decision for him as you stepped forward, embracing him tightly. He had always loved when you had initiated hugs or kisses, or affection of any kind, but today, it made his heart hurt. You didn't want him to leave, and he didn't want to leave you.

You were silent as your hands gently pressed against his back, drawing him even closer to you than he was before. Yoongi closed his eyes as he returned the hug, trying to memorize how it felt to hold you like that within his arms. Trying to remember how it felt when the warmth of your body was pressed against his.

He had experienced the joy that was being close to you so many times before, but he had never considered it in this perspective. He had almost come to take you for granted, only now realizing what he would be missing out on for the next two months.

Yoongi decided then. Screw easy goodbyes that consisted of pulling too quickly as a weak attempt to lessen the pain; it never made the pain better anyway. It only made a person regret not going deeper in that moment, not giving themselves something to store away and hold onto. And that was the thought in Yoongi's head as he pulled back and dipped his head down, eyes rolling closed as he kissed you without any hesitation. That was the thought in his head as he allowed his mouth to open slightly, his tongue beginning to mingle with yours. That was the thought in his head when he continued to kiss you in the doorway of your apartment, in the plain view of the public, likely running very late for the plane he was supposed to be catching with the rest of the group.

Saying goodbye wasn't going to be easy, no matter how he approached it. So why give it up so quickly?

Both of your breathing was a bit uneven as the kiss was mutually broken with reluctance, Yoongi's forehead pressed against yours in a way that he had done so many times in the past. He hesitated in that position for a moment, debating how much more time he could afford to share some oxygen with you before he really did have to leave.

"I love you," you whispered, sending more shocks of sadness throughout Yoongi. He moved again, just once more, allowing his lips to only softly graze across yours. It took every single ounce of strength he had within himself to pull away that final time when all he wanted to do was stay there like that with you forever.

"I love you so much," he replied, hesitating for a few short moments more before finally pulling completely, the two of you no longer physically touching at all.

"Don't forget to talk to me or I swear I'll kill you," you started, joking as a way to mask the emotion in your voice. Your attempts to remain strong were unsuccessful, however, as the tears that had been building in your eyes finally spilled over. Yoongi desperately wanted to take you back in his arms, kiss the tears off your face, and hold you until the sadness went away. But he knew that if he touched you again it'd be too difficult to pull away again.

"I won't forget," he promised, forcing a small smile before giving you one last look, and turning away.