Chapter Nine: Mistakes
After my mother was done yelling and I hung up the phone, I grunted in frustration. I was thankful my window wasn't rolled down or I would have thrown the phone out of the car. I clutched my phone, having anxiety at the thought. Shh..it's okay, baby. Mama's not going to hurt you.
Phoenix broke the tense silence when I didn't say anything, his voice sounded slightly concerned. "So..what are you doing?" He asked, noting the way I was petting my phone like it was a cat.
I turned to meet his gaze, slightly disoriented from the panic of my upcoming doom when my mother got a hold of me. "Having a nervous breakdown, why..what are you doing?" He started laughing, but quickly stopped when he realized I was being serious. Weird, but serious.
"It can't be that bad." He said with skepticism, shaking his head like I was overreacting. "All we did is go play paintball for a few hours. It's not a big deal." Logically I knew that wasn't what he meant, but I had to admit to feeling a little offended the way he so casually shrugged it off like it was nothing. Once again reminding me, that he was a player..and I couldn't emotionally handle going after another player.
"I think you're underestimating my mother's distaste for you. Not that I blame her." I said plainly, knowing it came off as rude but not particularly caring at the moment. I turned my head and looked back out the window, leaving my phone in the middle console. Mainly just avoiding his staring gaze, probably wondering what the hell my problem was.
"Eh, it's fine. Mother's never like me." He laughed, once again annoying me with how nonchalant he always was. He acted like this was funny somehow. But I'm telling you, if my mother had a tower..I would be spending the next eighteen years in it until I had grown enough hair to climb down and escape.
"It's easy for you to not care, you're not the one that's going to be grounded for the next decade." I glared at him, he looked slightly guilty he had offended me. I wanted to stay mad but as I watched him, there was a brief glimpse of a sadness on his face..that caught me off guard. I looked at him concerned, and he quickly brushed off whatever he was thinking and returned to his usual cocky demeanor.
"I just find it funny that so many people think they have me all figured out." He said bitterly, looking ahead like he was concentrating on his driving. I could sense he wasn't just talking about my mother anymore, he was referring to me. "If your mother has a problem with me, tell her I said she's free to come to me with any questions. It might not be as easy as it is to judge me without even knowing who I am but hey, crazy enough to work right?"
As the diner came in sight, Phoenix didn't say anything else as if he was done talking. Something in his demeanor had changed, less friendly. I began to feel guilty, like I had offended him without actually meaning to. The worst part was that he wasn't wrong. I have made a lot of assumptions, because he reminds me of my ex in the sense he's a ladies man. But in my defense, it's not like he seems to have that great of a reputation around town, either.
Phoenix pulled into an empty parking spot in front of the diner in silence, and I finally decided to swallow my pride and just ask. "So what, are you mad at me now?" I said the sentence as casual as possible, but I could still hear concern in my voice. Hopefully he didn't.
He laughed, though it didn't sound humorous this time. It came out bitter and cold. "I don't know you well enough to be mad at you. I tend to try to get to know someone before I make any judgments. I know, I'm weird that way." He reached out for the door handle before stopping, and seeming to decide to say one more thing.
When he turned to me, he looked like his normal laid-back, 'I don't care,' self. The only thing that gave away he was upset at all, was the slight edge in his voice as he spoke. "Let's be honest, your mother is about to forbid you to see me again anyway so..it was fun today, but whatever. No harm done. Thank God we didn't hook up, right?" I knew it probably shouldn't, but that last statement kind of hurt. But soon my sadness turned to anger, and I found myself getting out of the car to confront him. He wasn't getting off that easy.
When I slammed the door and walked around the car to where he stood in the parking lot, he looked startled by my sudden hostility. "That's not fair! That's not fair to make me feel like a jerk because my mother thinks you're a player and I agree with her." He raised his eyebrows and folded his arms over his chest, looking like I had angered him further. But I refused to back down.
"Oh, really? How's that not fair? You don't even know me." There was no mention of my mother, making me think that she had nothing to do with why he was really upset. He was offended that I had judged him. Not her.
"Exactly! I don't know you. All I know, is the information I've gathered in the short time that we've met. Let's recap, you basically used me at the bonfire to make your girlfriend, ex-girlfriend whatever she is feel some type of way." He rolled his eyes and looked like he was starting to protest but bit his tongue when he saw the anger in my face. "All you've been doing since I've known you is try to hook up with me. All while you still have obvious drama going on with someone else. You've done nothing but show me that you're a player and now I'm the jerk for believing you. So like I said, that's not fair." We glared at each other for a moment both our expressions tense, and filled with anger. I had no idea where this was going, and our 'stare down' showed no signs of stopping.
His dark and intense eyes burned into mine until finally, I saw them travel down to..my mouth? Wait..what's happening? He licked his lips, his chest moving up and down giving away his breathing was getting heavy. Before I knew what hit me his expression had turned from anger, to lust. In this moment I seriously wondered whether he was about to tell me to go straight to hell, or stick his tongue down my throat. I don't think I need to tell you which one I preferred.
"Nice to see you back in one piece." We were violently thrown our of our moment by the sound of my mother's voice. We turned to see her standing there watching us with her hands on her hips, looking entirely done with our crap. Just as I was wondering how much of the argument she had heard, she spoke up again. "Gia, say goodbye. We're taking my car and going home."
I didn't say goodbye to Phoenix. In fact, I didn't even make eye contact with him. I refused, afraid of what I might find there. As I walked across the parking lot to my mother's car and my mom trailed behind me, I was more confused what was going on than ever. I was feeling many mixed emotions at once.
What was he thinking? Were we just..not talking anymore? Are we cool, are we not? Is mom ever going to let me leave the house again? Ugh. I was so happy about getting the job, and then had a really fun time with Phoenix, more fun than I thought I would. Now I was in a horrible mood and probably grounded, and it was all because I got in Phoenix Santiago's car.
I made a silent promise to myself as my mother and I drove away from the diner in silence, to never make the same mistake twice. No matter how exciting making that mistake was.
The ride home was the most awkward car ride of my life. Both of us were completely silent. I was not sure why she hadn't tore into me yet, I could only assume she was waiting until we were at home in private. But I wasn't speaking because I didn't really know what to say.
You could say I had a lot on my mind, a lot of things I didn't want to talk about with my mother..who I was positive wouldn't understand.
When we pulled in front of the house and my mother parked the car, I was out of the car and walking towards the house before she even had the chance to turn off the car's engine.
I reached the front door and turned the knob only to realize it was locked. I stomped my foot in frustration, irritated my dramatic exit was ruined. I now had to awkwardly stand there and wait for my mother to come to the door with the keys.
She was still silent as she put the key in the lock and opened the door for me. As much as part of me wondered what she was thinking, something told me I might not like the answer. So without even turning around or making eye contact with her, I entered the house and immediately headed for the stairs to escape to my room.
"Gia." My mother called after me and I froze, something in her tone telling me to not take another step. Crap..I should have known I couldn't get away that easy, but it was worth a try.
I sighed, preparing myself for a long, drawn out speech about how irresponsible and naive I was for going anywhere near Phoenix Santiago.
My mom studied me for a moment, and I wondered if she was plotting the quickest, most painless way to kill me. I stared at a random spot on the floor, avoiding her thoughtful eyes.
"Back in Denver when you first told me you started dating Tyler, do you remember what I said?" Her voice sounded monotone, hard for me to read. My heart sank, not liking where this conversation was going. I did remember what she said, I also remember the fight it inspired between us.
I didn't respond, but just waited for her to continue..praying she really would make it quick. "I told you that you were too young and naive to handle yourself with a guy like that." She sighed sadly..remembering our argument, too.
She appeared as though she was waiting for me to give her some kind of confirmation I was listening. So I nodded, and waited for her to tell me how I had just proven her right. She had never got the chance to say 'I told you so' with Tyler, now this was her chance.
"I was wrong." My mother said finally, shocking the hell out of me. That was not where I saw this going at all. She pressed her lips together, waiting for me to process what she said.
"What are you talking about?" I asked bewildered, still not believing that this was leading to an apology. But sure enough, there was a look of remorse on her face and her demeanor softened.
"Nadine and I drove by the diner and saw my car in the parking lot. So I went in to talk to you, and found out you had left with that Santiago boy. I have to admit, I was really angry." I cringed as I remembered the way she had yelled at me over the phone. But before I could say anything, she motioned for me to let her finish. "I heard the way you spoke to that boy in the parking lot, and I realized I was wrong. You can handle yourself. You're not my young, naive little girl anymore. You learned from your mistakes, and you're growing up." Her voice broke as she started to get emotional. I hated when she cried, because it made want to cry too. I bit my lip, trying to will myself to not get emotional.
"Gia, I know I'm hard on you. I know it may feel like it comes from a place of judgment. But there's something I need you to understand." a tear ran down her face before she wiped it away, seeming embarrassed. "Your father..your father was my Phoenix Santiago. My biggest dream in life became for him to care for me the way I cared for him. Then after you were born, I found a new dream. To make sure, that no one ever broke your heart the way that he broke mine." She paused as she hyperventilated into weak sobs and I took a few steps forward, feeling the urge to comfort her.
She lovingly grabbed my arm and gave me a thoughtful smile. "But I can't save you by not letting you live. If you have kids of your own someday you'll understand, it's a very hard lesson to know when to loosen the reigns." My mother wrapped her arms around me and brought me in for a hug. Nobody, but nobody could give hugs quite like my mother could.
I wiped a tear away from the corner of my eye before she saw, breathing in my mother's familiar scent and wishing I could catch it in a bottle and keep it forever to have with me always.
When my mother finally released me from her arms she wiped her face, causing me to chuckle. I just knew she was secretly concerned if she had messed up her makeup.
"I'm sorry if I worried you. I should have checked in, but I swear nothing happened." I reassured her, leaving out the part that part of me really wanted it to happen. "Besides, I don't think we're going to be hanging out again." Something about that made me feel sad, but it was followed by confusion when I saw the skepticism on my mother's face.
"There's part of me that would really like that to be true, but I'm not going to hold my breath." She rolled her eyes, and I waited for her to elaborate. "I saw the fire between you two. I know I'm not power enough to convince you to ignore it, so all I'll ask is that you be careful with that heart of yours, because there's not another one like it in the entire world." She kissed me on my cheek and I smiled, feeling like a little kid again. I suppose I had underestimated my mother's ability to understand.
"Oh by the way..we heard from Chanel you got the job at the diner, congratulations! " My mother beamed, changing the subject when she remembered about my job. I felt my mood briefly lift up, noting I had just got what I really wanted. I had made my mother proud of me.
"I start on Monday, I'm pretty excited. But we can talk about later, how did it go with you?" My mother went on to tell me she had landed an interview as an accountant with the local firm, taking the opportunity to remind me how great it is to have an education.
I had to roll my eyes, but it was nice seeing her excited about something. I hadn't counted on our talk going so well, and it might even look like I'm not grounded after all.
My mother and I sat in the living room for a while and talked, mostly I listened about her potential job and answered her questions about my job at the diner. I had to admit that while I enjoyed my time with my mother, I couldn't take my mind off Phoenix Santiago. Today certainly didn't help make things less confusing.
"Mom, would you mind if I went to my room for a while? Chanel should be off work by now and I wanted to call and talk to her." I stood up off the couch and began searching my pockets for my phone.
My mother stood up too, straightening out her dress. "That's perfectly alright, honey. I was thinking I should go to the store and get a few things anyway."
As my mother walked out of the room, I threw my hands up, utterly disgusted. My phone was gone, and I was pretty sure I knew where I left it.
Phoenix Santiago's car.
The rest of the day was uneventful, especially because I didn't have my freaking phone. My mother made some kind of pasta for dinner, and I spent majority of my time in my room..still obsessing over not obsessing.
He's so dang cocky he'll probably think I left my phone on purpose to have an excuse to talk to him. I wish I could say I was that clever. Oh, God. What if he goes through my phone?! Not that there's really anything too interesting on there..but still! The thought panicked me.
Needless to say, I didn't get a good nights sleep. So the next morning I woke up early, hoping to see Chanel at the diner. I wasn't sure if she worked today, but it was worth a try. Then sometime I had to suck it up and talk to you-know-who so I can rescue my poor, neglected phone. Don't even get me started on how confused I was about that whole situation.
My mom used to say when you're feeling extra crappy, the least you can do is look extra pretty. Give her a break, she's not a poet. But today I decided to take her advice and choose a sassier outfit than usual.
I chose tight, black leather pants and a light black top paired with a jean jacket, and my mom came in the room just as I was slipping on my black boots.
"Oh wow, you look real fresh!" She took in my appearance with a friendly smile, and I rolled my eyes at her use of the word 'fresh.' Meh, she gets an A for effort.
"Thanks, I guess. I wanted to go see if I could meet up with Chanel. Mind if I take the car?" She looked hesitant as I grabbed the hairbrush sitting on my desk and started smoothing out my hair, it was obvious she was thinking of the last time she let me use the car. "I swear, mom. I'll be careful." I promised.
"Alright..I guess that's okay. Do you need some breakfast first?" She offered while I grabbed my perfume and sprayed myself down.
"No thanks, mom. I can get something at the diner." She barely got to wave before I was out the room. I wasn't sure why I was so anxious this morning. I suppose because my mind was such a mess, I felt the need to keep moving..afraid my thoughts would consume me.
Okay..so maybe I wouldn't mind running into a certain sexy bad boy with a city for a name. Though, he probably hated me now.
When I walked in the diner, I looked around and didn't see Chanel. There was another waitress I hadn't seen before yet working the tables. A slightly older woman with short, blonde hair and a cheerful disposition. But that didn't necessarily mean Chanel wasn't here, she might just be in the kitchen.
The place was a little busy, not unreasonable since it was Saturday. I decided since I was eating breakfast anyway to go ahead and find myself an empty table, and settled for a small booth that was by the window. It didn't take long for the older waitress to notice me and come over with a menu.
"Good morning! How y'all doin', today?" She spoke with a thick southern accent, possibly from Texas. I could tell right away she was very charismatic.
I smiled shyly and she set down the menu in front of me and continued without missing a beat. "Is it just you today or are we waiting on someone?" She took in the empty seat across from me, and suddenly I felt pathetic coming in here by myself.
"She's with me." I froze as the waitress turned around to see where the deep husky voice was coming from, but I didn't even have to look up to know who it belonged to.
Phoenix Santiago strolled up like nothing was wrong and casually sat down in the empty seat across from me. I stared at him still not really believing he was here, and he grinned at me.
"Resorted to stalking, huh, Gia Pet?"
author's note: If you enjoyed this chapter, please don't forget to vote :)
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