Chapter thirty-five: The inevitable

O L I V I A

Kai stayed over that night. He left early in the morning before I woke up, though. He was supposed to attend practice. He kissed me softly before he left. I missed his warmth beside me so I couldn't fall back asleep again. I decided to make use of the time and get up.

I showered and got dressed. I put my hair up in a bun, deciding to fix that look before I would have to leave for work. I pranced into the kitchen and made myself breakfast. Sam came out just as I sat down with some coffee.

"Hey," I greeted her. "Good morning."

"Hey," she mumbled. I took a moment to take her in and noticed that her demeanor looked tired. And it was seven in the morning.

I frowned. "Are you okay?" 

"Yeah," she muttered, sitting down beside me heavily.

"Sam?" I probed, placing my cup on the table and turning to her. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," she repeated.

"What's going on?"

"I feel sick," she whispered. "I hate this."

"Ohhh," I chuckled as it dawned on me. "Morning sickness?"

"It's not funny," she said, glaring at me through eyes hooded with the lack of energy.

I sobered up. "How can I help?" 

"Can you make me some toast?" She pleased.

"Sure. Be right back." I nodded, standing up. "Would you like coffee with it?"

She shook her head. "No. Just the toast."

"On it."

Ten minutes later I watched her nibbling on the bread while sipping my reheated coffee.

"How long have you known?" I asked her.

"A week," she said. "I suspected as soon as I missed my period."

"Ah." I nodded. That explained that. Sam was one of those people who had been blessed with a perfect cycle. Not a day here or there. "Josh?"

"Told him two days ago," she replied. "Boy, did he lose it."

"Really?" I grinned, "What did he do?"

She chuckled weakly. "I ain't telling you."

"Hey!" I protested. "Chicks before dicks!"

She tutted. "Not this time."

"Bummer," I dropped it. She didn't look like she would enjoy any pestering. "Speaking of, where is your lover?"

"He was up because something came up at work last night so I let him sleep in."

"Will you look at that? Barely a mother and you're already a changed woman," I teased.

"Haha," she deadpanned. I would've believed her apathy had I not caught the twitch of her lips. "Don't you have an office to get to?"

"Actually, I do." I glanced at the time. I had to finish getting ready. "Will you be alright alone?"

She rolled her eyes. "He might be sleeping but he's not useless."

"Right." I nodded. "I'll just-" I gestured towards my room.

She chuckled weakly. "Yeah, you do that."

* * * * *

"Thanks."

I cut the call. I was talking to Sam. She had been helping me with my anxiety. I had called her right then against my better judgment because I had really needed her.

I took a few deep breaths before stepping out of my car. I was trying to make sense of what was happening. They were following me. There were cameramen outside my apartment and there were a few reporters outside the InfoTech building.

Why the fuck was the paparazzi suddenly after me?

It was only thanks to the fact that we had security guards in both locations that I was spared. I was pretty sure some of them caught my surprised face. I wondered faintly how they found out where I lived and worked. It was creepy, especially because I kept a low profile.

I stepped into the elevator in the basement, practicing the breathing techniques I normally used, and chanted the new mantra Sam had given me.

Breathe in.

My love, my life, my choice.

Breathe out.

It was surprisingly very helpful. The doors opened on the first floor and Charlotte stepped in. My gut dropped.

"Good morning, Ms. Davis." Cold. Her voice was so cold.

"Good morning," I mumbled, feeling panic rise up as I remembered our last encounter.

Breathe in, breath out.

She turned to me as soon as the doors close, sealing me in with her.

"You really don't know how to listen, do you?" She asked flatly.

I was never a claustrophobic person, but I think I might end up being one if this doesn't stop.

I shook my head as what she said sank in past my bubbling anxiety.

"Excuse me?" I managed.

"Oh, don't act so innocent," she snapped.

Her irrational impatience sparked irritation in me.

"I'm not." I scowled. "I seriously have no idea what you're talking about."

"The fuck," she scoffed.

I blinked at her. Seeing my blank face, she huffed. The elevator doors opened on our floor and she gestured for me to follow her. It was still early and people were still trickling in, but the way they were looking at me and Charlotte had me feeling scared again.

I couldn't place whether it was because of the paparazzi or because of the fact that I looked like a lamb being taken away to be butchered.

She pushed open her door and glided in, leaving the door loose. It started closing again and after a moment of hesitation I hurried to push past and follow her in. It was a glass cabin like the rest of the office, except she had the same amount of working space just for her while I shared it with Jane and Brian.

"Sit," she commanded, taking her seat behind the desk. I sat down tentatively. "Last chance to fess up, Olivia."

"My answer is the same," I replied in a level voice. "I have-"

"Spare me," she gibed. Her fingers worked on unlocking her phone and she slid it to me. "Explain this."

My eyes focused on her screen and I frowned in confusion. It was a picture of Kai and me from the cafe. I was kissing his cheek while he was grinning like a fool, his pearly whites on full display. My cheeks were flushed and my blue eyes were bright. It was a cozy picture.

I noticed it was a post on Instagram. A post on . . . Kaison's public account. I glanced at the caption and it was a whole new task to keep my jaw from falling to the ground.

This is where you stole my heart all those years back. The best decision I ever made was to let you keep it.

Holy hit that's so sweet.

"Well?" Charlotte demanded. "Explain this!"

Right. That.

I racked my brain for a reply but came up short. "Um."

"Um?" She fumed. "Do you have any idea what you've done?!"

I looked up at her. She looked livid. Despite my inner fear of backlash of our relationship, it struck a chord in me I had forgotten I possessed. 

So something terrible had happened by just one photo being posted? One? Why were our personal lives a subject of other people's whims? Had they loved and lost what we had? Gone through what we did? Lived what we had to? 

No.

And this was never going to stop, was it? On every turn, at every crossroad, there would be at least one person telling us where to go, what path to choose, and how to live it. How would that make me happy? People were not always going to be pleased with something I was fond of. How long could I keep seeking social validation if the people who made up my social didn't care about me?

Maybe Kai was right. Letting go of what they thought would bring me peace. I couldn't keep being a puppet on a string. It was time I cut myself free.

Breathe in, breathe out. 

My life, my love, my choices.

And it was high time I made one.

"I hung out with my boyfriend and he posted a picture of us," I forced out.

"Don't fucking act smart with me!" She barked, slapping her palm on the desk.

That must've stung.

I held in a wince. "Are you done?"

"I warned you, Olivia." She glared. "You know what this means."

"You can't fire me over something that's going on in my personal life," I said. "Actually, you can't fire me at all."

"We can if it affects the company!" She exploded.

'We'.

"The company or your human ATM?" I inquired.

"We lost a major investor because of you!" She bit out venomously.

I froze, processing it.

"What?" I managed. "What has an investor got to do with this?!"

Wait, now that she mentions it . . . I do remember her telling me something along these lines the other day.

"Have you seen the latest articles about you and your boyfriend?" She scoffed. "Most of them have been floating a theory that Kaison Jennings is not injured, he's just taking a break from football to spend time with his new girlfriend. Who, by the way, is rumored to have wrecked his previous relationship.

"On top of all that, the Giants are almost losing all their games as it is because of that incompetent Martinez. Our investor was a huge Giants' fan. When this photo came up and the paparazzi traced them to you, our employee, he withdrew his funds. He said he will not invest in a company that hires such toxic people. You know what they say, the company is only as good as its employees."

My back hunched as I fell back into my seat. I felt electrocuted. All this because of a stupid person who believed false theories about one football player of the team he loved who happened to be my boyfriend?

"Look," she began more calmly this time, "You're a hard-working employee. Why do you want to give your job and possibly your career up for some guy who will leave you when he gets bored of you? Just dump him! You want rich love? I'll set you u-"

"What if I don't want to?" I blurted out. "You probably don't understand this, but I love him, Charlotte. I am not dumping him."

"Then fix this!" She hissed, her soft, persuasive tone gone. "Date him all you want but don't let it leak out to the press ever again. Do you understand?!"

I looked down at her and at the contempt in her eyes. The look of hatred she had to offer me. I blocked her out. I thought of the way everyone was looking at me.

Did I really want to 'fix this'? Keep my relationship hidden and live like a fugitive just because I felt bothered by the way other people viewed my personal life? Did I really want to dictate my life even if it leeched me of all my happiness? 

And what if some photo of ours got leaked to the press? That had happened before. And this thing I had with Kai seemed to be long-term and dare I say, maybe even permanent. Would I keep apologizing for something I should be celebrating? Keep lying? Keep this ruse up instead of concentrating on us?

No. No, I couldn't. I wanted to walk out with Kai anytime I wanted, kiss him as I pleased, and stay with him for as long as I wanted. Possibly forever. I wanted to do everything in broad daylight and not in the dead of the night like a thief as if I was doing something wrong. I wanted to walk in parks with him and cheer him during his games. I wanted us to grab lunch outside whenever we wanted, go ice skating, recreate our old memories and make new ones.

I didn't want to hide and the thought flooded me with surprising peace. 

It's my life. My choices. My love.

"No," I replied calmly.

Her glare just intensified. "I am not kidding, Olivia."

I swallowed the little nerves that had persisted and took a leap of faith.

"Neither am I," I said confidently. "I won't do anything about this."

"Oli-"

"This is my personal life, Charlotte," I said, addressing her first name again. She hadn't earned the respect for anything more. "I don't live for the company. I have no profits. In fact, all you've done is make me overwork and not pay me as much as I deserved. Now you're intervening in my personal life? Enough is enough."

"I'm going to make you-"

"No. You aren't doing anything." I shook my head. "I'm done letting you do things. It's time I did something. I quit."

"You can't quit!" She raged. "We have a contract."

"Well, then go ahead. Fire me," I said. I was surprised to note that the panic had disappeared altogether. For once I was feeling calm and peaceful even in the eye of the storm without having to hide.

She looked stumped for words. I realized her only blackmailing card was my job and I had just told her to fire me. A carefree laugh bubbled up my throat as I stood up.

"I'll go clear my table," I said. "I expect the email to arrive soon. Goodbye, Charlotte."

* * * * *

I got the email well after I reached home. While I was not anxious about the paparazzi, I was definitely mad. At whom? Kaison.

He fucking owed me an explanation.

I expected him to be there soon. Why? Because the cameramen downstairs had very graciously zoomed in on my car with another person speaking into a recorder when I had pulled into our parking lot. I was pretty sure Kai knew where to find me.

As if on cue, the door jingled open. Kai stepped in, his face worried.

"Livvy?" His eyes scanned the living room, went past my bedroom, and then landed on me in the kitchen. "Livvy!" He exclaimed, taking long strides towards me. As soon as I was within reach, he wrapped me in a huge hug. It took everything in me to not hug him back.

"What's wrong?" He pulled back when he noticed. "Mon amour, are you okay?"

I looked at him impassively.

His eyebrows shot up in a momentary panic. "Did you have another anxiety attack?" 

Almost. It doesn't count.

I nodded in negative and his shoulders slumped in relief. He kissed my forehead, muttering something ineligible.

"Then? Did something happen at work?" He asked me, his palms rubbing up and down my arm soothingly. He looked unsettled by my silence but I keep observing him.

His heart is in the right place, he just doesn't know how to go about with it.

"Livvy, can you please say something?" He pleaded when just I kept quiet and observed him.

I steeled myself. I couldn't melt into a puddle of goo then. I had a purpose. I took a deep breath to strengthen my resolve.

"We need to talk."

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

A/N: No one wants to hear those four words.

QOTD: If your partner ever cheated on you, would you ever consider getting back with them?

All my love,
xoxo.