EMMA

"Okay, so Adam will be coming," I note to Gemma as she frantically scribbles across her baby shower notepad. "He told me at work on Monday."

After his conveniently timed vacation, Adam came back as if nothing strange had happened. Not our almost hook-up and not his out-of-nowhere trip.

In a way I was glad to be back to normal Adam and Emma, but it was sort of weird to see him at my office door, a mug of coffee for him and a hot chocolate for me in his hands when he finally showed. Maybe the sooner we forget the whole situation ever happened the better.

"Okay," Gemma murmurs, looping a dramatic circle around one last pair of guests. "That just leaves Beck and Zoey. And the baby, I guess."

"Hm." Nadine grunts disapprovingly, leaving a maroon stain around the edge of her coffee cup. Her dark eyes scan her cafe quickly before coming back around to us, brows set in a stern scowl.

I nod shyly. "They're coming, too."

Gemma stares at me, her pen hovering above the paper. "If you say so..."

"Look, I don't love it." I sigh, facing both of my friends. "I actually don't like it at all. But they're his family. His nephew."

"And that family includes his father, too, Miss Emma." Nadine clucks her tongue, crossing her arms over her chest protectively. "You mean to tell me that girl didn't know he was coming? Knowing the trouble it would cause?"

I press my palms to my eyes, tired of analyzing the same things again and again. Was I mad at Beau for fighting?

Mad isn't really the right word. Worried, more like.

Worried the altercation would set him over the edge, tear him down again. But after watching him fall apart in my arms after bailing him out, all I felt was proud. Proud that through everything, Beau somehow managed to make it.

That and anger at Jack, Beau's dad. For what he did at the party, yes. But more for what he did when Beau was younger. For not loving him the way he deserved.

And yes, I'll admit, I'm both a little pissed off and skeptical of Zoey.

"She said she asked Jack after she found out we weren't going." I mutter, the excuse seeming flimsy even to me. "Beau changed plans and apparently she never mentioned it."

"She just forgot to let Beau know?" Gemma cocks her head to the side, pen propped between her lips. "Isn't it, like, a big deal - the stuff between Beau and his dad? Doesn't she-"

I hold my hands up and shake my head. "Okay, okay, okay. Enough about Zoey! She's got a lot on her plate, with the baby and all, so maybe she did forget. I don't know." Her stress was nearly palpable the last time I saw her, the fussy little boy attached to her hip. "I don't want to think about Beau's ex more than I have to. So can we maybe move onto something else?"

"All I'm saying..." Nadine rests a hand on my forearm. "Is that I don't like her."

I can't help but smile. "I know."

"And she better watch out at the shower." Gemma pouts. "We'll kick her ass if she doesn't."

"And I'm very grateful for that." I laugh, my hands naturally resting atop the basketball dome under my shirt.

"Speaking of our baby," Nadine coos, "How was your appointment yesterday?"

"Great." I beam proudly. "Baby is doing amazing, it all looks normal. Now it's just waiting out the clock."

"I still can't believe you won't tell us if it's a boy or girl." Gemma exhales, lower lip jutting out as she gazes at my belly. "We could've gone even further with the shower if-"

"Enough of that," Nadine chuckles, quieting our over-zealous party planner. "Can you imagine this one at our weddings?" She nudges me playfully.

But Gemma and I don't laugh, both staring at Nadine with our jaws dropped.

"What?" She mutters, flattening her apron over her lap, feigning obliviousness.

"Did you say wedding?" Gemma gasps.

"While I'm sure we're in for quite the spectacle with G," I pat her arm when Gemma almost argues, "You never, ever, ever, talk about getting married." I search Nadine's features for any sign that she's somehow fundamentally changed. "Are you and David that serious?"

For the first time, I see a hint of blush behind Nadine's dark cheeks. It deepens as Gemma squeals, almost jumping from her stool with excitement.

"Oh my God!" I cock my head at Nadine inquisitively. "Do you love him?" I smack her arm lightly. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Oh, hush." Nadine brushes us off, but neither of us will give up so easily.

"Nadine is in love! L-O-V-E, lo-oove," Gemma sings, getting louder each second Nadine doesn't provide details.

"Alright!" Nadine laughs, shaking her head so hard her dark curls bounce up and down. "Get her to quiet down, will you?" Immediately, Gemma is silent without my help, holding onto Nadine's every word.

As am I.

"I might love him," Nadine rolls her eyes, shrugging lazily.

"Yes!" Gemma shouts, thrusting a fist in the air as passionately as her little body can muster.

"I can't believe it," I lean in and hug Nadine close, amazed at the change and how it happened without me even noticing. "David is a lucky man."

Nadine winks. "He knows it."

"I want details. Have you told him yet?" Gemma leans forward, fingers drumming rapidly on the table, the shower notebook shoved aside amidst this new gossip. "Did he tell you? Oh my god, who said it first? Don't keep us waiting!"

"Excuse me?"

An older woman with a walker approaches the table, an empty mug shaking in her hands as she speaks to Nadine. "I know you're on break, dear. But I couldn't find that boy behind the counter and I'd like a refill."

"Oh, I never thought I'd be grateful for that kid." Nadine laughs, tipping her head back carelessly. "Go take a seat, honey. I'll bring you another cup right now."

The woman smiles her bright pink lips gratefully and returns to her table, her husband, I assume, patiently waiting for her. How sweet.

Nadine stands, twisting her back and tying her curls back into a low bun. "Well, my ladies. That's my cue."

"No fair." Gemma protests. "We didn't hear the good stuff."

"I'm really happy for you, Nadine." I give her another hug before she goes back to work. Watching her for a moment, I'm overwhelmed with gratitude for everything she's been to me over the years.

David has no idea just how lucky he is. Not a damn clue.

"Okay, so, more on that later." Gemma gestures to Nadine, cheerfully pouring a steaming mug of coffee behind the counter. "But back to shower planning..."

***

"Val!" I gasp, throwing my arms around Valerie's neck as she enters the lake house.

Taking a step back, I examine the hot, confident brunette in front of me. An earpiece in, pressed pencil skirt and silk blouse professionally fitted, and sporting a sharp haircut, Val looks more like the dragon lady publicist, Fiona, that she worked for than the intern I met all those years ago.

"You look so different!" I exclaim, still not fully believing she's here.

With her busy schedule in LA and everything going on here, I'd become accustomed to random phone calls. FaceTimes if we were lucky.

Gemma really went all out.

"So do you," Val laughs, cradling my belly with a massive smile. "But yeah, this is me." She gestures to the expensive outfit. "Turns out even though Fiona was a complete bitch, she did know what she was doing."

After sharing more pleasantries with guests arriving to the shower, Adam, Connor and David, Wren and Jess from work and their girlfriends Delilah and Annie, Zach from MisFits and his girlfriend whose name I didn't bother trying to remember for a brief bit, and even Kim and her cat over video-chat for a few minutes, I settle at my designated mommy-to-be seat.

The large recliner is placed at the front of a circle of chairs Gemma arranged, so we can all chat and interact while we eat. By my feet is a stack of gifts, wrapped in gorgeous hues of blue and pink, light yellow and peach paper and bows.

Stuffing my face with some catered - Gem truly spares no expense- Mac-and-cheese, I scan the room to find Beau and Parker, off to one corner by themselves.

Laughing, but still seeming so uncomfortable. Dressed in mostly black, they stand out from the pastel decorations, the frilly wall hangings and impressive tower of sparkling white cupcakes. Beau catches my eye and winks, punching Parker in the shoulder after he made a sarcastic comment, I'm sure.

I blow him a kiss, holding my belly between my hands. As my stomach pops out from the kicks inside, I murmur to the baby softly, below the rest of the party chatter.

So far the shower is lovely. It's bright and cheerful and it doesn't hurt that everyone's telling me how adorable I am pregnant. But at this point, I'm over the pregnancy. This shower only makes me more eager to meet little Beau.

My head snaps up, torn from the intimate moment with my child as the front door hits the wall behind it, accompanied by piercing shrieks. Zoey and Beck struggle through, a large carseat in tow. Immediately, I feel Gemma's eyes on my face, notice Nadine stand from her chair next to David.

I push myself from the recliner, using my hand to balance myself before greeting the couple. "Zoey, Beck. Thanks for coming." I peer down at the baby, red-faced and angry looking. "Hi Jack," I wiggle my finger at him and he screams harder.

"Oh, Emma!" Zoey thrusts the carseat into Beck's chest and tosses an arm around my neck like we're old friends. "You look beautiful!"

Returning the hug despite my confusion, I'm relieved when another arm wraps around my waist. This one, I lean into, inhaling Beau's scent as his chest rumbles against my cheek. "You made it." I notice he doesn't tell them he's glad.

"Sorry we're late." Zoey pats her tousled hair frantically. "Traffic."

"Yeah," Beck scoffs, putting the carseat on the floor. "Traffic. I told Zoey we should've got ready earlier, but-"

"Really, Beck?" She snaps, the friendly act gone, replaced by tired annoyance. "Now's the time?"

"Whatever," Beck shakes his head, shrugging at the rest of us. "Hey, man. I'm Beck, Beau's brother."

I glance over my shoulder to see Parker reluctantly accept the handshake, his disgust hardly masked by a disapproving smirk. "Parker." He introduces himself and I nearly laugh when I realize he also did not say he was glad to meet them.

Beck, too, notices the similarities between the two, looking back and forth sheepishly. "Wow, um..." He shifts from foot to foot awkwardly, finally mumbling about getting something to drink.

"I'd love something, thank you." Zoey rolls her eyes when he doesn't offer. Eyes round as she observes the lake house, she barely hides the envy in her tone. "Emma, you have such a lovely home. It's... beautiful."

"Thank you." I lean into Beau. "It's my family home."

"Hm," She murmurs, eyes distant like her mind is somewhere else entirely. She tilts her head back, gazing at the high windows overlooking the lake.

I peer up at Beau, wondering if he's picking up on her peculiar mood, but he's leaned in to hear Parker muttering in his ear.

Coming to my rescue, Nadine joins us, a lemonade in hand for Zoey and an invitation for us all.

"We're playing a game, why don't you all come and join us over here?" Nadine guides Zoey towards the circle and I find Gemma, notebook in hand, already watching me.

I subtly give her a thumbs-up and a silent thank you.

"Okay." Gemma commands everyone to quiet down, placing large glasses I know she doesn't need on her nose before referring to her notebook. "The first game is called Guess Who. Everyone gave us a baby photo - we all have to try and guess who's picture is who. Whoever gets the most right, wins. Double points, of course, if you can spot beautiful baby Emma!"

For the rest of the afternoon, I lose myself in the excitement of shower games, onesie decorating, and gift-unwrapping. Well, except for when Adam so confidently declared he'd found my baby picture, which was revealed to be in fact, Zoey's. The thought makes me cringe.

Now stocked with more than I could even need for this baby, set with a plan to reorganize the closet to accommodate hundreds of diapers, and full to the point of explosion on dessert, I finally breathe a sigh of relief when Zoey announces she and Beck are headed home.

It's like I can focus on just us now. My family. Not Beau's past, not his kid with Zoey, not the trip they have planned coming up.

Returning from the kitchen with some leftover cupcakes and macaroons for them to take home, I almost stumble into Beck.

"Thanks, Emma." He takes the wrapped goodies and adjusts his grip on the car-seat, Jack finally asleep after hours of crying.

But I'm not paying attention, too focused on Zoey, huddled in the corner with Beau. Beau's expression is exasperated, annoyed even, but Zoey's is desperate. And when she notices I'm looking, I swear I see her lip turn up just a hair, her eyes glinting with brief smugness.

A moment later, they return to us. A renewed smile spreads across her face as Zoey thanks us again for having them. It's all I can do to remain polite until they get through the doorway.

Soon after, everyone else still here filters out as well. Gemma, Connor and Adam back to their apartment, Nadine and David to her place, and Val to her hotel with the promise of seeing me tomorrow.

Stifling a yawn as Beau closes the door behind Val, I groan into a pillow. "I can't clean up right now,"

"So don't." Beau shrugs, like it's obvious.

"I'll do it tomorrow." I stretch on the couch, eyelids heavy, my body feeling like it's sinking into the cushions. Heavenly. "I promise."

"Baby, don't fall asleep on the couch. Come to bed." Beau kneels in front of me, his forehead touching mine.

Not opening my eyes, I mumble my response. "Carry me."

Without hesitation, his lean arms swoop beneath my body, scooping me to his chest in one fluid motion. Sighing contently, I almost fall asleep to the rhythm of his body moving up the stairs.

But when he places me in bed and everything is quiet, I suddenly feel wide awake. I can't stop thinking about Zoey. How something about her and Beck just seems so... off. And it's not just the fighting. I can't put my finger on it.

"What's wrong?" The bed shifts with Beau's weight.

"It's nothing." I mumble, feeling silly.

"It's not nothing if it's making you upset."

"I just..." I take a breath, meeting Beau's eyes hoping he can see my sincerity. My concern. "I have a funny feeling about Zoey. I mean, I saw you guys talking and-"

"It was nothing." Beau reaches for my hand. "Just confirming details about our trip to see Max."

"Yeah, but that, too, Beau." I shake my head, my bottom lip clamped tightly between my teeth. "It's not that I don't want you to check on your kid. It's just... All of it just seems so strange."

Beau kisses the top of my hand, speaking softly. "I won't let anything happen, Em. I just want to finally put the whole thing to rest. If I go, she'll stop trying."

"You believe her?" I whisper.

Beau's brows knit together tightly. "I have to."

Not fully satisfied, I snuggle into his chest. I have to trust him. It's my only option. I can do that, can't I?

Without disturbing my position against his body, Beau reaches down to grab his guitar, lazily strumming a couple of chords, a soft hum in the back of his throat.

I smile to myself, recognizing the lullaby instantly.

Hush Little Baby.

I keep still, my mind racing enough to leave me exhausted, until eventually, Beau stops playing. Planting a kiss on my belly, he turns out the light and puts his arm back around me.

Within minutes, soft snores rattle in the air between us.

Unable to stop the thoughts - the fears and concerns - from coursing through my mind, I creep downstairs to grab a glass of water. To think, without worrying Beau.

In the kitchen, I flip the light above the stove on, exhaling as I lean against the counter, my finger knotting in my hair.

Just relax, Emma. Everything will be fine.

God, please let Beau be right. I just want this whole thing behind us so we can focus on our future.

Taking a water bottle from the fridge, I notice a dark shape on the back porch, illuminated by the soft glow of an outdoor light.

What the... Did someone leave something?

As quietly as I can, I glide the slider open, bending to grab what I can now see is a bouquet of roses. My breath gets caught in my throat, my pulse racing instantly as I scramble to get back inside.

Heavy in my hands, it's easily the largest bouquet I've received yet. Locking the door with shaky fingers, I quickly find the note, stuck between blood red petals.

Moving closer to the light above the stove, the hair all over my body prickles as my breath becomes shallow, the words freezing me in place.

So soon, mama.

Rose petals and water spread at my feet as the glass vase shatters across the floor.

wow what a long chapter! I think my longest ever. took me forever to write it piece by piece but it had to be done!
leave your reactions in the comments - I'm dying to see them!
remember to vote if you liked it ❤️