holy shit i just changed the ending of this book now im pretty sure y'all will hate me. oops.

also ill be releasing a stray kids and a blackpink fanfic soon so gimme a follow if you dont wanna miss it hehe :D *end of self promotion*

***

November, 3rd.

"Okay, I gotta go, my Dad is here I need to open the door for him-", Taejeon whispered to Lili on the phone before he put it away, ended the call and got up from the small bed he was put in. He only got a guest room, not even his own room. This didn't feel like home, it never did and not even his mother felt like home anymore. Since she was with this guy, she wasn't the same and Taejeon hated it, he seriously hated it so much. Going here was just to get Jungkook to think about whether he wants to stay with Taehyung and his toxic boyfriend or leave the love of his life for his son.
Well, it didn't go this way. It took him around 5 hours until he texted his father, begging to pick him up from here.

The kid quietly rushed downstairs and opened the door as quiet as he could. Right in front of it was his Dad, smiling sadly when he saw his son with stained tears on his puffy cheeks. "Dad", Taejeon let out, falling in his arms. Taehyung just stepped back.
"Why did you bring him?", the boy asked in a small voice. "Jimin is gone for now", Kook explained with a weak smile. "Let's go. Where's your mother?"

"U-upstairs", Taejeon hummed.
"Does she know I'm picking you up?"

"N-no, b-but I'll send her a text", Taejeon hurried to say but it was too late already. Jungkook got it, something was obviously wrong, very wrong. "I'm not taking you away from her without you saying goodbye to your own mother."
Taejeon shook his head, "Dad let's just go. Mom is, she's b-busy.."

"Busy with what? It's in the middle of the night-"
Taehyung coughed slightly, "Jungkook she's got a boyfriend. Probably with him, don't you think?" The kid nodded to that. "Exactly."

Jungkook gulped dryly. He remembered how Lyza talked about this guy, he remembered how sad she looked whenever they mentioned this guy. "Taejeon, is your Mom okay?", he asked quietly. The kid didn't answer. "Dad, let's go."

But Jungkook didn't move the slightest bit. "I'm not leaving without knowing she's okay."

Taehyung sighed heavily, "Jungkook, let's go. That's none of your business."
"Maybe it's not but maybe it should be!", Jungkook groaned and then walked past them, quietly getting upstairs.

He heard crying, just silent sobs at first but with every time he heard skin slapping against skin and a deep moan, the cries got louder. And with every sob, there were whimpers swinging alone with groans in pain.

"Please, p-please stop-"

Jungkook bit his lips, his heart sinking down his knees when he kept listening. "Dad", Taejeon rushed after him. "Dad this is wrong, stop listening to her having.. This."

"How can you want me to leave while she's being abused?", Jungkook asked with so much reproach in his eyes that Taejeon felt his heart stop for a beat.

The 25 year old stopped talking to Taejeon and just opened the door, not thinking about what he was doing, what this might cause.
At first there was silence once he entered the room, followed by the guy getting up from the bed and pulling his zipper up. He hadn't even undressed, the only one naked was Lyza.
Like some whore he just used for his own pleasure. "Lyzzie-", Jungkook let out. He didn't get any further because not even 20 seconds after he opened the door, he got a fist right onto his nose. Jungkook stumbled back, hitting his head on the wall as he sunk down to the floor.

"Dad let's go", Taejeon begged. His mother quickly put clothes on, still crying hard while she got up, trying to pull away her boyfriend from Jungkook. "Babe it's fine", she mumbled, hugging her guy from behind so he wouldn't punch Jungkook again. Taehyung was already balling his fists, his face going red as he tried his fucking best not to freak out like he did before when Jungkook got hurt.

Jungkook however was holding his nose which was bleeding, standing up again. "Get away from her! Get the fuck away from her", he said but his voice was cracky and it was soft and it wasn't dangerous at all. The guy only laughed. "Is that your faggot ex?"

"Oh god no", Lyza held her breath. "Do not say that to him, please don't", she begged, pulling him further away but Kook was already holding his breath again, clinging onto the wall behind him. "I-I-"

"Why are you here Kook?", Lyza asked, tears falling down her cheeks. "Just go."

"Taejeon asked him to pick him up", Taehyung said, now stepping forwards. "And you-", he pointed on that guy who was pushing Lyza away from him now. "What did you call my boyfriend?"
"Faggot." The guy laughed amused, tilting his head as he stepped closer.

"Babe, stop right now", Lyza let out, getting back up after being pushed away. "Since when do you even talk? Shut the fuck up, stupid slut. Got pregnant with 15 by a faggot, you're nothing. Shut the fuck up and put those ugly clothes off."
Lyza's eyes glued to the floor as she nodded, trying to wipe her tears away. Jungkook stepped forwards again, now balling his fists all over again. "Come on Lyz. We're leaving."

But the girl shook her head, "Just go, Jungkook."

"No, I'm not leaving you with him."
"Just go."

Taehyung sighed, grabbing Jungkook's hand. "Let's go."
"Yeah, go. Take your failure of a kid with you and let me fuck my girlfriend in peace."

Taejeon tilted his head, "And I thought he was a well-educated nerd-", he sighed and then walked out of the room. "I'm not a failure by the way. You are, though." The kid smiled, "That's no way to treat a girl, you bitch." Then he walked downstairs, shrugging his shoulders because he couldn't care less. If his mother wanted to stay with that dumbass, that's her problem.

Jungkook was about to freak out because this asshole just called his son a failure but seeing Taejeon giving a fuck on what this man said made him calm down immediately.

"Lyza let's go. Why do you stay with someone like that?", Jungkook questioned once again. But the girl wasn't answering, "Just go."

Taehyung pulled Jungkook away from them, "You can't save everyone, Kook."

"But I can try!", the boy yelled out, trying to get out of the older's grip. "And you did try. Let's go."

With that he slammed the door shut and pulled Jungkook downstairs, leading him out of that apartment.

*

November 10th.

"Jungkook."
Jungkook turned his head away, staring at the wall. "Kook. Baby. Talk to me."
The boy didn't answer, his eyes sparkling with tears again. The fifth time in the past hour. Taehyung gulped dryly, his fingers slowly rubbing circles on Jungkook's smaller hands. He noticed that Jungkook put his nail polish off, no black nails anymore.
"Kookie, I need you to talk to me", Taehyung tried again but Jungkook now looked through the window, tears falling off his cheeks quietly. It was the middle of the night, silence on the streets outside and the world appeared somehow peaceful. Way prettier even, the snow outside making it look like christmas already.

Christmas.

This would be their first christmas together in five years.

Taehyung sighed as he laid his head down on Kook's broad shoulders. "It's gonna be okay, I promise."
But the younger only held his breath, lips trembling as he tried not to break into tears again. Everything felt so heavy at this point, there was no point in trying to think of it as something that would gonna get better. Something that fades away. Losing someone never just fades away, there's always something that stays with you for all your life. With every breath you take and with every word you speak. They appear in your darkest dreams yet they are present in the brightest sunlight as well. It depends, it really depends on how you've seen them throughout their life. Some people stay with a warm feeling in your stomach whenever you happen to think of them.

And some just don't. They leave with a bitter taste in your mouth and an aching heart in your chest.

"I messed up, Tae. I've been such a bad son", Jungkook let out, finally speaking his mind. Taehyung let out a breath in relief, glad that the boy got to a point where he felt comfortable enough to talk about everything that happened in the last couple of days.
"You had to save yourself, Kookie." Taehyung rubbed over Jungkook's back, circling his fingers on the fabric of his shirt to calm him down.

"I had to save him too. He lost Mom, then he lost me. There was nothing left, I should've been there Tae, I should've been there, should've done something, y'know?"

Taehyung shook his head softly, "He knew that."
"He yelled at me when I visited him."
The older nodded, "Because he was dying, Kookie. He regretted not having more of his son, it's understandable isn't it? That doesn't make him love you less. You've always been on his mind, we spent hours and hours just talking about you and your goddamn smile, Kook. All we wanted was to have you back, but we knew why we couldn't, okay? Stop feeling so bad about yourself."

Jungkook looked away, pushing the knot down that formed itself in his throat.

"Kookie, he's not gone y'know?", Taehyung whispered. "He's going to be in your heart forever."

"That's not the same, Tae. I wasn't even there when he died-"
"No one was, we weren't there fast enough, Baby."

"And that's the thing, he had to die all alone. I should have at least been there and-, a-and just held his hand or something I don't know, I'd be so sad if Taejeon wouldn't be there when I'd be on my deathbed."

"Taejeon would be there, though", Taehyung whispered.

Jungkook nodded, "Of course he would. Because he's a better son."

"You can't compare me and you to you and your Dad", Taejeon said from behind them and walked closer, crawling on his father's lap quietly, turning his head towards the window as well. They were at a hotel by now after Jimin came back some days earlier, wanting Jungkook out of his house. And Taehyung finally left with Jungkook, things were still awkward between them.

But when they received the message that his father passed away, for a moment none of what happened mattered to them. Grief was a horrible thing to go through, for the two of them. Both boys loved Mr Jeon all their lives, feeling like he had to go way too early.
But that's life, right?

Jungkook sighed. "I wish I could have been there", he mumbled again, putting his chin onto Taejeon's head as he hugged his son tightly. "Dad I'm eleven now. You must stop to treat me like a five year old. Lili will get jealous if you hug me."

"Thought you two weren't a thing?", Taehyung chuckled softly but Taejeon only gave him a warning glaze, "Thought you and Dad aren't a thing anymore?", he snapped back, tilting his head in a pretty much devilish way.

"Can we go and get ice cream?"

"Taejeon, it's winter and it's snowing-", Taehyung sighed quietly. It was way too cold to go outside. Plus it was night. Taejeon wasn't making sense as usually. "Lame", Taejeon hummed and pressed a kiss to his father's cheek, "Dad you cry awfully much since we've got here."

"I'm sorry-" 

*

November 12th

"I'm not going to marry you if you buy that", Taejeon stated, crossing his arms in front of his chest as he looked onto his phone screen. Lili was in a store right now, showing him different dresses she wanted to buy for a charity event this week. "I need to look pretty-", the girl sighed heavily as she threw away the dress she just had on and put another one on. "Well you always look pretty", Taejeon shrugged, sighing a little.

"Y'know, I really miss you, Lili-"

"I miss you too, but do you ever think about what happens if your father decides to stay in Korea?", the girl hummed, sitting down on a chair in the changing room, pouting her lips. "Well, he can't do that to me, I don't want to live here. I'm basically american-"

"You're korean, Taejeonie-"
"I don't feel like it, so", the boy grumbled and let his head fall down on the table in front of him. He sat in some coffee shop that was still open at 9pm. "I miss Minho's coffee shop", he then complained, not feeling comfortable here at all.

"I've been there yesterday, everyone's asking for you and your Dad", Lili hummed. "You will come back soon, right?"
Taejeon shrugged, "If my Dad figures his shit out with Taehyung, then yeah."

Both kids sighed heavily.

"I gotta go, my Mom is waiting for me outside!", Lili squeaked and then hung up the call. Her mother couldn't know she was facetiming Taejeon while she was in the changing room, it was a bit too intimidate somehow.

"Hey kid", a quite young man sat down at the table where Taejeon was sitting at, smiling softly as he put his cup of coffee down and unfolded his newspapers. "Where are your parents?", the man asked a little worried.
"Busy with being shitheads", Taejeon shrugged. "Can you sit somewhere else? I don't talk to strangers."

"Am I a stranger though?", the guy asked, chuckling a bit. "I'm friends with your father. Or well, I was. In highschool, y'know, the good old times."

Taejeon raised his eyebrows and distanced himself a bit.

"What are you doing here all alone that late at night?", the dude asked, still sounding worried about the kid. "There are lots of bad guys out here lately, you should go home."
"The only bad guy I see is probably you-", Taejeon hummed, clinging on his phone in his pockets because he got a quite bad feeling in his stomach.

"So, how's life?", he then asked.
"It sucks", Taejeon grinned at him ironically. "Just like you, go away."

"I'm literally just trying to talk to you-", the guy grumbled. "Well, no one wants to talk to you."

"Damn, I thought Lyza would raise her kid better-", he bit his lips, tilting his head. "Little brat you are-"
"She didn't raise me, my father did."

"Explains a lot."

"Thought you were friends with him?", Taejeon grumbled, balling his fists. "Bet you wish you were but you're not cool enough for him. Bitch."
The guy rolled his eyes, "Goddamnit you do know how to fight back-"

"Someone has to do it", the boy shrugged and then looked away, sighing to himself. He just wanted to get out of here, going home. To Chicago. And have a cozy night in his bed with Netflix, pancakes and Lili next to him, not being here and dealing with bullies from his father's past.
"Isn't it a little rude to behave like that towards your father's friends?"

"My Dad literally has no true friends, so fuck off."

"What about his fag friend Taehyung?", the guy asked, lifting his eyebrows. "None of your business", Taejeon smiled back, looking innocently and cute while he was ready to kill that dude any moment.
"Oh come on, spill the tea. Did they make it by now?"

"I hope they won't", Taejeon hummed, biting in his cupcake which he had laying in front of him. "Taehyung's too fucked up. My Dad does not need any more broken people-"

The boy nodded, "Is he okay by now? Y'know, after all that went down with the ruined wedding and-- stuff."
"He's fine, thanks for asking", Taejeon nodded.

"So where are you guys staying at the moment? I heard Jungkook's father died, so you can't be staying there-"
Taejeon sighed heavily, then got up from his seat. "Do you really think I'm that dumb?"

The guy bit his lips awkwardly, "What are you saying?"

"DUDE, I have no idea who you are but for sure no friend of Dad. Since you know him I assume you're one of his bullies and saying where we stay at would only weaken us, and I prefer my father not getting hurt again. GOD WHY IS EVERYONE SO FUCKING STUPID IN THIS COUNTRY-"

And with that Taejeon slammed the money for his food on the table and walked past the boy, heading outside.

***

yk before i started writing this book i told a friend i'll make taejeon famous and it seems to be working