the way i will miss this book so much once it's done

but also the way i can't wait for it cuz i have another vkook book in that style planned out ugh

***

 1 week later

"So", Lyza walked in that morning, throwing a bucket filled with water over Taehyung's head to wake him up. "That's the shower you've been missing for ages", she grumbled, pulled his blanket away and walked over to Jungkook's wardrobe. "Let's see what our Kookie got for you to wear for your first day at your new job."

"I don't have a job, fucking bitch", Taehyung scoffed, sitting up slowly while pulling off his wet shirt. "Don't you have better things to do than to wake me up like that?"

"Not really, no", Lyza shrugged, shaking her head. "I dropped Taejeon off at the hospital at 6, I'll pick him up before he has to go to school and then I'll take you there-, that's all I'm doing", the girl hummed, pulling out a black T-shirt, some pants that could fit Taehyung and brought it to him, "Put that on and take a real shower."

"What the fuck", Taehyung hummed confused, ruffling his hair.
"Well, Taejeon called Mr Kim, Jungkook's boss and he agreed on letting you work there as a part time job, you gotta get your shit together Taehyung, I'm serious", Lyza explained, heading over to the door frame. "Who are you to tell me what to do?"

"I'm not doing this for me", Lyza laughed. "But I already experienced how it feels when Kook loves you a little less with every passing day. I don't want you to go through that as well and you're on the best way to get there."

"Jungkook won't stop loving me. You've just been shit, no idea how anyone can keep up with you." Taehyung chuckled, finally getting out of bed. What he didn't think was that Lyza leaned against the wall, smiling a little. "Have you been going out lately?"

Taehyung shrugged, "We had no time for that."
"Oh yeah, he used to say it's hard to make time for us with the kid and stuff", Lyza nodded. "Have you had a good conversation in a while?"

Taehyung looked away, "We had stuff to work out."
"Oh yeah, we always had that too", Lyza giggled a little. "Have you seen him smiling the past few weeks?"

"His father died."

Lyza nodded, "You get it, right?"
Taehyung rolled his eyes, "Fuck you." Lyza smiled, threw a pair of boxers at his head and flipped her hair, "Well, you're welcome. Now go and shower, shithead."

"Stupid bitch", Taehyung scoffed, walking over to the bathroom to take a shower and put fresh clothes on. He couldn't believe he seriously let a girl tell him what to do after she threw water at him and insulted him on the worst. As if Jungkook would stop loving him, he couldn't do that. They were meant to be, they always had been. Why would he stop loving him?

Taehyung kept thinking about that while he put shampoo all over his body and washed it off, while he got out of the shower and put clothes on. They were a little tight because Jungkook loved to show off his thighs and his butt while Taehyung was more of the loose type of guy.

No complaints too, those tight jeans were the best thing Taehyung's eyes ever witnessed on Jungkook.

"Hurry up", Lyza said after she opened the door and walked in as if she was his mother or something. "What if I'd be naked right now?", Taehyung hissed at her while she turned her head and looked a bit confused, "Nothing I haven't seen before?"

"You might get horny and want to do it again", Taehyung rolled his eyes, "We couldn't do that to Jungkook."

"I haven't even been thinking of that, dumbass", Lyza laughed, "You're so not my type, Tae."
"Good, you're not my type either", Taehyung blurted out, shaking his head as he walked out of the bathroom to get some breakfast. "Where's breakfast?"

"I thought you could make it", Lyza smiled, "I guess you're used to Jungkook being the one who's in the kitchen, just like he was used to me being in the kitchen. That's not how relationships work. So, go and make breakfast."

"Yeah, for me. Not for you, we're not in a relationship", Taehyung snapped and Lyza nodded, "I don't eat breakfast anyway", she said a little distant and then closed the door of the bathroom and locked it to take a shower herself.

Taehyung grumbled something to himself and then walked over to the kitchen, starting to prepare breakfast. Of course he put a plate on the table for Lyza too, Jungkook wouldn't like it if he let her get through with her not eating habits. Taehyung knew Lyza loved eating, but he also knew her mother.
Back in time when they were teenagers and long before Jungkook and him were a thing or before Taejeon was born, they used to hang out together with some other friends. And Lyza was always the one girl who just ate as much as she liked too, he still remembered how one day Jungkook told him that's what draw his attention to her; that she just acted how she felt, not how girls were supposed to act.

And that's also what he missed the most when he started falling out of love with her.

"Oh look, look, look", Lyza hummed when she came back in twenty minutes later and Taehyung had set up breakfast for the two of them. "That's nice of you, Taehyung. Thank you for your efforts. Even though I usually don't eat breakfast, I'll do today to appreciate your efforts."
Tae rolled his eyes, "Love that sarcasm."

"It wasn't", Lyza said softly, sitting down. "I'm just showing you how to react if people do things out of their free will. Like Jungkook does when he goes out by himself and doesn't cheat. You should appreciate it, not lock him to avoid it."

"In which world do we live in that we have to appreciate our partner not cheating on us?", Taehyung hissed at her, "That's sad."

"That's not what I meant, Tae. But you should never take love for granted, so be thankful for every day your partner loves you. There comes a time when they maybe won't anymore", she smiled weakly, glancing down, "And trust me, that hurts like hell."

Taehyung nodded, picking up a piece of apple and eating it slowly. While he was chewing on it he thought about how much she had been through to think like this. Lyza really changed over the course of time, when she was 14 she was nothing but a pretty girl with a naive mindset. Even with 19, she had still been naive and narrow-minded, trying to fit into something others expected from her.
But now, with 25 years Lyza turned into a confident young woman with a powerful mind and that was somehow, y'know.. Stunning.

"Do you ever wish it had been different? With you and Kook?", Taehyung asked out of a sudden. "Do you ever thought about how it could've been if he would've never found out he's gay?"

Lyza chuckled softly, shrugging at first before she gave an answer, "Everyday, I do every single day", she hummed and Taehyung could swear there were tears sparkling in her pretty eyes. "He's been my first love", Lyza shrugged, "I think your first love will always remain somehow."

"He was my first love too", Taehyung snapped, crossing his arms, "And I was his, so stop. He's mine."

Lyza let out a sigh, "Here we go again. Something is seriously wrong with you, Taehyung."
"It's not", Tae grumbled, "I just don't like the thought of you and him together."

"Do you think I like the thought of you and him? For fuck's sake, I hate it and I always did but look at me, sitting here and dealing with your shit just that you get your fucking happy end even though you for sure as hell don't deserve it right now."

"I've been through a lot, I deserve an ending to this never ending bullshit."
"Don't we all?", Lyza questioned back.

"Why are you even helping? That's none of your business", Taehyung sighed quietly.
Lyza nodded, "Absolutely right, it's not. But it's my son who has to grow up in the environment you and Jungkook set for him and if you haven't noticed, it's all about the kid here. At least for me and Jungkook, we're not looking out for us anymore. Being a parent is the most wonderful thing, y'know, you truly learn to put someone's else's happiness as your top priority."

"That's toxic, your own happiness should come first", Taehyung only replied shortly.
"When you're a parent, Taehyung, your kid's happiness is your own happiness."

And that hit the right spot. Taehyung simply got up and grabbed his jacket and keys, "Can we leave?"
The girl nodded and threw her jacket on as well, "We're going Christmas shopping this afternoon when you're back from work. I'll pick you up there, we'll meet Skylar, Lili and Sam at the mall. I thought we could buy a small Christmas tree and put it up in Jungkook's hospital room? And hang out there at Christmas, would you like that?"

"I don't want to celebrate Christmas with you", Taehyung scoffed.

"Me neither but since I'm here I can't go home to see my family or celebrate with Finn, neither can you go to your parents or Jimin. And who's the only one who connects you and me? Taejeon. Where will Taejen be? Right, at Jungkook's. So leaves you no choice, stop whining and get your shit together for god's sake, it's getting annoying Taehyung. You're 25, not 11 and so far Taejeon has been more mature than you have ever been."

"I really don't like you."
"Good, makes two of us", Lyza smacked his head and then got to the car she rented for some weeks with her mother's money. Taehyung got in and leaned back, "When do I have to work?"

"11am till 4pm", Lyza replied, "And you better not punch his boss or any of his co-workers like you did with Minho just because they're close to Jungkook too."
"I wouldn't", Taehyung rolled his eyes.

Silence.

"Okay maybe I would", Taehyung snapped, "But I'd punch you first because you fucking piss me off."

"Love you too", Lyza grumbled, focusing on driving down the road without looking at Taehyung and his snoppy ass at all because he was truly annoying her today. She had no idea how someone could be that ungrateful even though he had it all. He had an amazing boyfriend, a kid that had the ability to lighten up everyone's day and he had a future with both of them.

He had everything Lyza worked so hard to keep but failed at.

She stopped at the hospital parking lot which wasn't that far from Kook's apartment luckily and let Taehyung out of the car. "I'll wait for Taejeon out here, and I'll pick you up in two hours. And be nice to Kook, alright?"

"Girl, what makes you think I wouldn't be nice to my Baby."

"I mean things like locking his door to keep the doctors from touching him or something, I have no idea what you're fucked up mind is telling you to do this time", Lyza replied calmly and Taehyung felt anger rising up again, "The doctors touch him?", he crossed his arms, "Who? I think I might talk to them."

"They're doctors, of course they do. They even pull his shirt up to control his heartbeat and shit. Horrible, huh?", Lyza joked and Taehyung inhaled deeply. "Well but they are doing it to help him."
Lyza smiled softly, "Correct answer, you're allowed to go."

"Thanks, Mom." Taehyung rolled his eyes and then slammed the door shut, walking through the main entrance. And while doing so he realised one thing, Lyza was such an amazing mother and it was such a waste that she never got to actually raise a kid because it had never been with the right man.
Taejeon already came rolling his way in his wheelchair, Lili besides from him. Both of them only gave Taehyung weird glances. "You showered", Lili mentioned and Taejeon gasped, "If you showered with Mom, I will rip your dick off and feed it to Lili."

"Ew what the fuck?!", Lili cried out in disgust, scrunching her small nose.

"Well, I didn't", Taehyung hummed. "But she forced me to."

"Yeah man, she did that to me too today", Taejeon rolled his eyes, "Women are a horrible thing."
"Thanks", Lili nodded. "You're not really a girl", Taejeon sighed, "Your body is but you're perfect so you're obviously not a girl."

Lili smacked Taejeon's head and then pushed his wheelchair forwards, "Bye Taehyung, we gotta hurry. Taejeon has to do his homework because I just decided not to let him copy mine today."
"You're not even in the same class, how-", Taehyung let out and Lili smiled, "I'm smarter so I do his as well. Might reconsider that though", and with that the kids disappeared outside and headed to the car.

Taehyung however walked into Jungkook's room and slammed the door shut, "Oh my my my", he sighed and crawled into Jungkook's bed, wrapped the blanket around the two of them and kissed his cheek, "God I've missed you", he sighed. "Your ex is a pain in the ass. She actually makes me shower and ugh. I have to work today! God. I feel like a grown-up."
No answer, as usually. So Taehyung only sighed to himself and started holding Jungkook's hand, softly brushing over his fingers, "So they said while being in coma the patients sometimes see and hear things that happen in their surrounding. What if I suck you off? Would you like that?"

"TAEHYUNG", a voice made Taehyung look up confused and he saw Jihyo and Namjoon standing in the room, both had their arms crossed and worried looks on their faces, "You're such a nasty ass. If you do that once, I will personally put a restriction on your name to visit Jungkook in here ever again", Namjoon groaned and Jihyo nodded, "I hope you were joking."

"How am I the one who always gets yelled at", Taehyung sighed. "Everyone is against me."

"You just wanted to suck a coma-patient off-", Jihyo hummed and Namjoon agreed, "And you always fuck up, how can we not be against you?"

"I'm human too", Taehyung grumbled, "And I have feelings too. And I miss my boyfriend too. And his dick. And his smile. And the way he would usually wrap his arms around me in his sleep and hug me all the time. God, I miss him and yet everyone is just yelling at me as if I'd be bad for him or something-"

Jiyho sighed and nodded then, "It's fine, Tae. We know, we know."

"No you don't", Taehyung snapped, "Taejeon and Lyza are pushing me forwards and want me to do shit and get my life together but all I want is cry and hug Kookie all day. I just want to go back to highschool where our worst problem was where to hide to make out in private-"

"You're not in highschool anymore", Namjoon said dryly, "Trust me, there are times for all of us when we want nothing but cry all day, but no one of us actually does so, we just get up everyday and get our shit together. So should you, start acting your age."
Jihyo softly pinched the boy's arm, "Can you be a little softer with him? He's having a hard time too okay?"

"Right!", Taehyung blurted out, "Thank you Jihyo!"

"Nothing to thank for", the girl smiled and then went over to Jungkook's bed to control his body. Taehyung gritted his teeth but he let her do it and didn't yell at her when she touched him. At least it was for his best and that's what counts.

"Is it weird if I give him kisses?", Taehyung suddenly asked, "I think he might like it-, I won't suck him off I PROMISE", Taehyung asked quietly.
"It's your boyfriend", Jihyo shrugged, "We're in no position to give you any rules. Sucking him off is bad for him on a medical level, kissing him won't do anything."

Namjoon nodded, "You can kiss him, it's fine but don't make out with him as if he'd be awake. And don't use him as some sort of toy, get a butt plug or something if you're horny."

"I'm not a bottom", Taehyung whined. "But okay. Fine. Look away I really need to kiss him right now", he sighed.
Jihyo and Namjoon inhaled deeply but then let him get his will and turned their heads away while Taehyung leaned over and pressed a small kiss to Jungkook's soft lips. Taehyung and Taejeon had been putting lip balm on them every day because they knew that Jungkook hated dry lips the most.

He got cut off by the machine next to him that suddenly started peeping loudly, Namjoon and Jihyo twirling around and running over just to realise that Jungkook's heartbeat had been speeding up for some seconds. "Oh god", Taehyung said and his eyes glued to Jungkook's. "Is he waking up?"

"No idea", Namjoon let out, staring at the screen, "Come on, Kook-", he whispered, "For fuck's sake we know you're there somewhere."
Jihyo gulped dryly, trying to avoid tears coming up. Even though she didn't knew Jungkook, being around his family and friends made her love the pretty boy already. Plus, seeing Namjoon whispering to himself like this, it was truly heartbreaking. Because she knew for a fact that Namjoon didn't care for bad souls-, so that must mean something.

"It was probably just a body reaction-, it's an impulse. Guys, it happens", Jihyo said slowly, biting her lips while watching the boys staring at Jungkook. Taehyung let his head fall back after a while and Namjoon suddenly blurted out, "Do it again."

"What-", Taehyung squeaked. "Kiss your boyfriend again, NOW", Namjoon almost yelled out.

Taehyung hurried and pressed their lips together longer this time. It didn't do anything to the heartrate again. "See, it was just an impulse", Jihyo hummed sadly and Namjoon nodded, "Seems like it."

"It happens", the girl let out and Taehyung could feel tears coming up when he pulled back. God, what would he give for Jungkook to just kiss him back. "I swear", Taehyung let out weakly, "If I ever get the chance to kiss his lips again with him kissing me back, I will personally get him the stars from the sky and buy him flowers everyday and I will-, I will make him so happy. I swear to fucking god there won't be a single day where he feels like crying and I will give him the world and-"

"Tae", Namjoon said slowly.

"No, not just the world I will give him the whole damn universe and I'll get a real job with good money so I can buy a big house for him and Taejeon and even one for Lyza right next to us so Taejeon can grow up with both of them, I don't care she could even live with us, I just want Jungkook to be happy and Taejeon too and I would work as hard as I can so I can promise him a lifetime without worries and I would-"

"Taehyung", Jihyo tried.

"I would never lock him again or forbid him anything, I don't fucking care I would even invite stupid Minho for dinner and bake him cookies if that's what makes Jungkook smile. And- and I would-"

"TAEHYUNG HIS FINGER JUST MOVED FOR FUCK'S SAKE", Namjoon yelled out and pointed on Taehyung's ring finger. Jungkook had his small finger wrapped around it and Taehyung didn't even notice.
For a bit he didn't know what to do so he simply bursted out in tears, hugging Jungkook so tight. "Can you please wake up, man. Life fucking sucks without you."

"It's a pinky promise", Lyza said quietly, standing in the door frame because she was back to pick Taehyung up. "He didn't grab my pinky though", Taehyung let out quietly when he met the girl's eyes. "When we were 15 and I got pregnant", Lyza started and moved closer, stopped next to Jungkook's bed and ruffled the boy's hair, "One night he was asleep and we were holding hands, he did the same to my hand and said in his sleep he pinky promises to marry you. I didn't think anything of it because I knew he's your best friend so I was like okay whatever he might just say your name out of coincidence but-"

"Maybe it's his way of unconsciously responding", Jihyo shrugged. Namjoon shook his head, "Guys that would be extremely rare that he's that conscious while being in coma."

"Shit like that happens, Namjoon. I've seen it happening with lots of patients who were in a coma for years. Their bodies sometimes reacted. Even when they never woke up-"

Lyza and Taehyung literally looked the same right this very moment, every color fading out of their faces as their expression went blank, "Never woke up?"
"I thought that might be a sign that he's slowly waking up", Taehyung whispered but Jihyo shook her head sadly, "No it's natural for a body in artificial coma to still react. It's a sign that he's still somewhere in there, that his brain is still working but sadly it's not more than that."

"This sucks", Lyza let out.
"It fucking does", Taehyung whispered.

***

i was bored so i put together a small playlist of songs i listened to while writing this book n i think u should listen to them too so i'll write them down <3

easier- 5sos
who do u love - chainsmokers
feels great - cheat codes
do me - kim petras
someone you loved - lewis capaldi
call you mine - chainsmokers
youngblood - 5sos
truth untold - bts
back in my arms - carlie hanson