The next day I spent trying my hardest to avoid talking to Weird Chemistry Kid (whose name I'd recently learned was Jason) and enduring the taunts of Charissa-or-something Stevenson in the halls. Apparently, she was the one whose mother had ran into mine at the supermarket the other day. It was especially difficult to let that fact sink in, considering I had no way of telling during the school day exactly what my mom told hers.

All I knew was that now, she had valid grounds to call me things like "little space geek," and "rejected Zelda," all while wearing that million-dollar cheerleader smile of hers. I could take it. All in good fun, right? At least that's how she acted like it was. Well, I did know she was trying to get to me. But like I said earlier; it didn't feel as genuine as it would be if she legitimately hated me.

Some of her quips still stung a little, though.

I walked back from the busted vending machines empty-handed and went to find an available table in the cafeteria. It looked like I'd have to wait until dinner to have a decent meal; my wrinkled one-dollar bills weren't being accepted today, and lunch-line natural selection in my grade was brutal because of approaching midterms. No way in hell was I getting mixed up in that mess.

After a little while of walking around aimlessly, having been indirectly rejected by most of the main tables, I saw that blessed girl Meghan wave me over. Again, she'd probably a topic for another time. Only one other person was sitting at her table, and as uncomfortable as it was, I took a seat next to her. And across from him.

"So you guys know each other," Jason said after a long awkward silence, probably as some attempt to break the ice. I nodded silently. Meghan flew into the topic like nothing would please her more.

"Yeah! Used to hang out all the time in middle school, but then kinda lost track. Still talk, though. How do you two..." her eyes flitted back and forth between us, waiting for someone else to speak up.

"Chemistry class," I answered reluctantly, avoiding eye contact with Jason. While I didn't look at him directly, I did see him shoot Meghan a look. A look that seemed to communicate, If you say anything, I will kill you. Meghan looked confused for a second, then let out a silent "oh!", puffed up her cheeks and nodded.

I didn't really know what to make of that; only that he might've already mentioned me to her, and he didn't want her to say anything stupid in front of me about it. I kind of understood. Either way, I decided it was probably best to ignore it and carry on.

The rest of lunch went surprisingly smoothly, and despite not eating anything I was able to make it through the day. There was just this one little hitch in the halls on the way to Art 2 that stuck with me.

I saw a group of girls almost all wearing the same kind of crop-top hoodie abomination that I would never be allowed to own, chattering away in their own isolated corner like something big was about to take place. Maybe Sephora was dropping some new lipstick, or palette, or some crap today. Maybe they'd heard through the grapevine that someone they knew was recently outed as gay. But when I got closer I knew instantly it was nothing of the sort.

"Oh, my god, right? I mean...it's just so weird! Stalling for time? Putting their head down? Not yelling at you for everything you've been put up to?"

"You know what they say; buy them low and sell 'em high."

"That makes no sense, Sarah."

"Oh. Well, you know what I mean. This means they've got some weak point. I don't know exactly what it is, but something has to have happened to make them act like this."

"Well, then, like, what do we do with that? I just feel weird about it, guys."

"It's fine. You don't have to do anything, anyway. But if you want to be on time for that sale at—"

"What'cha guys talking about...?" I interjected, pretty sure none of them could see me just standing there. Some of them inhaled sharply; some just held their breath. Two of them said sarcastically in unison, "You." It hurt my brain to try figuring out how serious they were being. Whoa. That's some good reverse psychology shit.

But one thing they all had in common was that sneer. Disguised almost perfectly as a sweet smile. Almost.

I raised an eyebrow and made to walk past their little gathering when I recognized one face out of many.

I stopped.

She smirked and waggled her fingers at me, as if to say, Hey, slut.

Right back at you, bitch, I thought to myself. But I really ended up muttering, "Hi, Charissa," and walked away helplessly.

But how do I know she's faking it?

—

Avery.

"Are you sure you want to talk to me right now," I mumbled into my hands. I rolled over and buried my face in my pillow. "Kind of not my best self in this moment."

Yeah. I'm sure. I promise I won't fly off again. Wanna tell me what's happening?

"...god. Fine." I sighed, making to sit up only to get startled and flop back down. He was already standing right next to me. "Jesus! Okay, you really need to stop doing that."

"What do you expect me to do instead? Just...fade into existence whenever you're ready?"

"Didn't seem to have a problem doing that in-game," I muttered under my breath. Ben's eyes seemed to grow darker at that.

"Seven years late, man. I haven't even—" he started, but then stopped himself. "No. Nope. Not doing this now. You're obviously just pissed at something. Which may or may not be me."

"It's not."

"Good. I was not at all prepared to apologize for something I didn't even know I did, so, good."

"It's just...no. It's really not that big of a deal. Just something stupid."

"Well, if it's so stupid, then you can just tell me, right?"

"She called me 'space geek' today."

Ben paused. Quite literally. I think something in him just stopped at that. I wasn't really sure why but it couldn't have been anything good. After a good minute, he raised a hand, almost as if to pat my shoulder. But he didn't.

"...anything else?"

I racked my brain for something that would make sense, but wouldn't upset him too much. But why should any of that upset him? He shouldn't care that much about you, this is like some weird roommate situation. He doesn't actually have to care about you. You don't even deserve it.

"...she knows I got the game. Sh-she doesn't know about you," I added quickly, "but she knows I got some Zelda game. And now has nicknamed me accordingly." I finished with a semi-dramatic sigh and held my head in my hands. Before I could come up with another excuse—no, reason why it wasn't that important, Ben lightly grabbed the top of my head like a crane and twisted it to face him, pinching his eyebrows. I widened my eyes. And?

"So, what you're saying is, this girl found out private information about you—"

"Not private. And my mom told her."
"—and is now using it to hurt you for no real reason you can see?"

"Maybe I was mean to her one day! Maybe something small happened a long time ago that I forgot about, and she's still pissed over it! You know, 'pobody's nerfect!'"

"That's no excuse," he countered, now visibly annoyed. I scoffed and stood up. "Whatever. It's really not—"

"Avery, I'm serious. I mean...I get that I sound like a mom right now, but you can't just put up with something like that! This has been going on for a month now, probably longer, and I'm tired of it!"

I almost laughed in his face. Is he seriously concerned about me? "Why are you doing this? Do you actually care about me?"

"Yes! I do! So listen to—"

I cut him off by kissing him on the lips. For a little bit.

Well, a while.

Okay, he had to push me away to get me to stop, but in all honesty I don't know why I did it. I just needed him to shut up for a second. Ben sputtered, his face a dark blue with marble-like cracks in its center. Is that what a ghost blushing looks like?!

"Why did you do that," he nearly whispered. Or at least, it sounded like it. More likely his voice was too hoarse to say anything properly. My face flushed, and I grappled for anything that could be considered an answer.

"You were being too nice to me, I had to stop it," I rushed to say. After a moment, he let out a tiny giggle. "What?"

I felt my fingertips twitching in embarrassment. "You heard me."

"No, I know what you said. Why wouldn't you want someone to be...nice to you...?"

I glanced away, completely unsure of how to respond. Once I got some footing, I sat back down and sighed, still averting my eyes.

"It must be nice to still be living in the early 2000's, huh."

Ben looked even more confused. "What do you mean?"

"I mean kids these days—" I jabbed a thumb at myself "—have even more shit self-esteem than ever. Do you really think I'd want people to waste their breath on helping me function?"

Once I said that, he almost froze, like he'd never come across this kind of mess before. Well, that's understandable, he's kind of been isolated his whole death.

"Not really, it's just that nobody's dragged their personal problems into the mix with me before."

Right. That mind-reading shit.

"I thought you were used to it by now. But...you usually try to act so nice around me, you think I can't return the favor?"

I actually laughed this time. "Check your complete and utter lack of privilege, Ben. I've never been indoctrinated into a life-ruining moon cult. I'm still alive. I'm pretty much legally obligated to feel bad for you."

"That felt a little condescending."

"Whatever. The point is, my problems aren't half as bad as yours. You're not the one who's supposed to help me here."

Ben paused, then sat down next to me and twiddled his thumbs. "We could help each other, though. Isn't that one of the first things I said to you? We could be friends."

I scoffed, pressing two fingers to my forehead. "And look what I went and did with that."

"I'm not blaming you. I do have the power to make myself surprisingly hot for a cis, white, 17-year-old guy. It's miraculous."

"What I'm saying, Ben, is that I don't think I've met someone in my life who didn't have it worse than me. Even that kind-of-bitchy girl...she probably deals with heavy shit all the time. I once saw her cry in the middle of math class because one word problem had a sick dog in it." Ben opened his mouth to speak, and I put my hand up to stop him. "No period jokes in this relationship unless they come from me."

"I wasn't going to make one!"

"Don't lie, you're my age and I know what guys are like at this point."

"...fine. But I was also going to say, that doesn't mean you don't have problems. You shouldn't just shut yourself up because you think everybody else has it worse."

"I'm sorry, who am I talking to right now?"

"Good point. I once went on Yahoo answers and asked if there was a way to kill myself if I was already dead."

"Wait, you're lozsucks69? I haven't seen that question anywhere else."

"You saw it? I was praying that username sounded normal. Did I seem like a regular, living person?"

"Yes, a super pretentious one."

"Oh, thank god."

That actually made me laugh. Just because Ben had been so casual about most of his issues from day one, it made everything feel a lot less awkward than it could have been. Maybe spending your afterlife trapped in the internet makes you open up a lot easier.

"Thanks, man. I feel...better? I guess."

"Good. So you'll actually go off on that cheerleader when she calls you something fucked-up again?"

"Absolutely not. You overestimate my willingness to get my ass handed to me by a 1% junior."

"That's what I thought."

"Did you hear what I just said?"