After 1 week
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I have learnt to maintain my distance with Mr. Perfect Jawline ever since that free food incident at Second Chance. I mean, he did try calling me a few times that day, but I did not answer. So, finally he ended up apologizing via text, which I accepted not because I was done being mad, but mainly because the deal is important to me and I didn't want to upset my client unnecessarily and lose it.

So yeah, since then we've mostly shared only professional emails with each other. I mean, it's not like we had any personal conversations before that. It was always only official. But at least for a day, I received those WhatsApp texts from him with emojis, right? Now, that's no more.

In a way, this is good. It almost feels like I don't have a crush on him anymore. Of course there are times when l suddenly think of his perfect jawline or his infectious smile, and my heart slightly misses the good moments, but then I have come to terms with the fact that Zayan is just a client and this is how things should be between us. Besides, I don't need a man to make me happy or my life interesting, right? I can do it myself.

Perhaps I feel a little empty and sad when I'm overwhelmed with work or too bored with my monotonous life. This is why it is important to take a day off work and have some me time to refresh and reenergize yourself.

And that's exactly what I am doing right now seated here on a bench at Viharamahadevi Park, except that I am not alone. I'm with my niblings. Since the three of them had been asking me to take them out over a long time, I came to Colombo today just to have fun — not even going to think about work while I'm here.

I don't know how fun this is for me but the little ones are enjoying it. And seeing them happy makes me happy. It is of course very tiring to take care of three kids all by myself, but I feel great about the whole thing. At least I'm able to put a smile on their cute faces, and I hardly have any time to daydream about jawlines or stalk stupid exes. So, it's all good!

We've been roaming around Colombo since morning. Earlier we were at the zoo and now are at the park. Both spots — not so great, but when you are from Wattala, any public spot in Colombo feels like magic, especially to kids who don't get to go out much.

We are planning to drop by a cafe next and Second Chance is very much close. But I don't want to go there — one, because of the payment issue, and two, because Zayan might be back in town, and I'm not ready to face him unless I have official reasons.

"Can we get ice cream, please?" asks Iyad and his sisters join him too. I say "sure" and walk upto the ice cream truck when my phone vibrates. Wonder who it is! All my clients know I won't be working today.

Perhaps it's Salima, texting to find out about the kids. Anyway, I can't check it until I buy the ice cream and find a proper spot for us to sit. Public parks are scary. I must ensure the kids' safety before I do anything else.

As we return from the ice cream truck, Caira points at a bench nearby. It looks safe, so I take them there. And I finally unlock my phone. It's a WhatsApp text from Zayan that reads,
"Possible to drop by today? Gotta discuss something with you 😊"

Well, well, looks like he is back. Since he has used the word "discuss" it sounds like he wants to have an official meetup. But why would he tell that on WhatsApp and not via email? Could he be planning to call me out for my dramatic behavior?

Or does he want to discuss about the video I posted on the page yesterday? I mean, he hasn't shared his feedback on it so far. Perhaps he doesn't like it and wants me to remove it. Either way, he could have simply emailed about it, right? This is strange.

What do I do now? I can't go there with the kids for an official discussion. Even if I keep them occupied with food, they would still make it a point to sit on my lap or make sure the attention is on them by turning my face towards them while I talk to Zayan, or shout around or do something that might make me look unprofessional. I mean, can't blame the kids. It's after all their day to have fun!

The best thing is to explain to Zayan and meet him tomorrow. So, I start texting him.

Me: Hey I'm like 5 mins away but can't come by coz I'm with family 😬
Me: is it ok if I come tomorrow?
Zayan: no prob
Zayan: but since u are around, try to drop in today 😀
Zayan: just a quick thing
Zayan: it won't take much time 😊
Me: umm I will try
Zayan: I'll take that as a yes 😀👌🏾

Okay, why am I feeling butterflies in the stomach now? These messages don't mean anything. Just a few emojis. Why would I get excited for this? I feel disgusted about myself for the way my inner self behaves sometimes.

Perhaps I should just warn the kids and take them there. "Guys, I'm going to meet one of my clients. It's a nice place. They have cake and other goodies. You all can come too. But you will have to behave yourselves. Possible?" I ask.

"Can we talk to your client too?" asks Haya with a serious look on her face. Caira follows it with "Yeah, chocolate cake and meeting! That's cool!" And finally Iyad joins in with "Yay! Fun!"

I book an Uber and roll my eyes at them, because I truly don't know how messy this meeting is going to be!

As I enter the cafe, the first thing my eyes notice is Zayan's jawline. Man! Did I miss it or what? Look at him in his grey t-shirt and tapered jeans walking towards me. Oh my poor heart!

I guess I muttered under my breath "wow" because Haya says, "This place doesn't even look fun. Why do you say 'wow'?" Oh God! She has started already. Wonder what else she would say! "Baby you are not supposed to say rude things" I say and she makes a face at me.

"Hey Ilhaam! How are you?" asks Zayan and shoots a look at the kids. Okay, is he going to call me unprofessional now? I hope not! I smile awkwardly and say, "I'm good. Umm...these are my niblings. They were with me when you messaged, so I had to bring them. I'm sorry."

He smiles and tells me, "That's totally fine. Don't worry!" And then he turns towards the kids and says, "My name is Zayan and Ilhaam helps me with a few things here. Now, if I may ask, what are your names?" Thank God, Zayan is a nice guy. He is at least pretending to be cool with the idea of bringing children to a meeting, even though he might be secretly hating it.

The kids introduce themselves and continue to speak to Zayan endlessly, when I interrupt their conversation by saying, "Come, I'll get you all something to eat." As I try to walk towards the counter, Zayan says, "No, make them sit first. I will get someone to bring the menu."

While waiting for the order to arrive, Zayan keeps talking to the kids. He is very sweet. Surprisingly they seem to like him too. I have never seen them this engrossed in conversation with a stranger. As for me, imagine yourself being trapped among four extroverts — that's how I feel right now!

Once the food arrives and the kids get occupied with their cakes and milkshakes, Zayan turns to me and says, "Very smart kids. Absolutely adorable. It's good that you brought them." I just smile because I'm sure he is only trying to be polite. I know for a fact that most men are not very fond of kids. I mean, being a woman, even I'm not a big fan of kids unless they are family.

I ask Zayan, "So, what did you want to discuss?" He smiles and says, "I'll come to that. Before that, I just want to tell you I'm sorry for whatever that happened last week." I smile awkwardly and say, "It's okay. I overreacted too. Maybe you were just trying to be nice but I'm not used to such things. Perhaps that's why I was a little defensive."

"That's fine. Maybe it's time for you to get used to it" says Zayan with a smile and I can't help but notice how sharp his jawline is! I keep staring at it as if I'm hypnotized, and without my knowledge, I mutter under my breath, "damn jawline!" I realize the blunder I've made, only when Zayan says, "I'm sorry, what?"

Oh my God! What do I even tell him now? How embarrassing would it be to admit that I have a crush on him because of his jawline? He might think I'm a weirdo.

I stammer and say, "umm you know... 'joe line' is what I said...I mean, there is this TV series named 'You' in which a serial killer named Joe often crosses the line because this girl keeps leaving free cakes and other baked goodies for him all the time." Damn Ilhaam! It was a good excuse. But how does it even relate? I hope Zayan just drops the subject.

"So you are telling me you will turn into a serial killer if you accept free cakes from my cafe?" asks Zayan with a confused look. Why on earth is he summarizing my pointless words in one line? Can't he just move on and discuss something official?

I keep smiling awkwardly when he himself says, "I'm sorry I don't get the reference. Yet another thing like memes I guess. I don't understand a lot of things that your generation talks about."

Wow! His age is my biggest trump card. Looks like I can always say inappropriate things and escape by putting the blame on our generation gap. "Oh that's alright. Leave it then. Can we now discuss whatever you wanted to?" I ask with a smile.

"There is nothing to discuss. I just lied to you. I have something to give you though. Wait, I'll bring it" says Zayan with a chuckle and walks away. Lied to me? What on earth is going on with him? This dude is equally weird like me.

As I feed the little ones their cakes, Zayan comes back and hands over a box to me, saying, "Here you go, this is for you." A big box? What could it be?

"What is it?" I ask and he says, "Open it and see." I shoot a strange look at him and before I could touch the box, my niblings start doing the needful. And all three of them exclaim, "Chocolates!"

Yes, indeed! It's a box full of chocolates of different types and brands — and it's a lot too! I can't believe Zayan took my word seriously. It was just a joke. I honestly did not expect him to bring it — definitely not so much. Now, I feel bad about the whole thing.

"I can't accept this. I was only joking that day" I say and Zayan, without paying any attention to my words, starts laughing. That's when I realize the kids have already started taking the chocolates out of the box.

"Darlings, this is not for us. Put it back" I say. They all look at me sadly and ask "But why?"

"Because your aunty doesn't love you, that's why she doesn't want you to enjoy it" says Zayan in a jovial tone and I frown at him. That's not something he should be telling my niblings.

Before I could say anything, Iyad asks, "You don't love us?" and Caira drops the biggest bomb ever! She points at Zayan and says "you don't love us because you love him now?"

Why are my generally-well-behaved-niblings embarrassing me like this today? What might be Zayan even thinking of me? I'm sure he has figured out by now that I have a crush on him. Ewww Ilhaam! This is disgusting!

I try to hide the embarrassment and say, "Im..I'm sorry. I shouldn't have brought them at all. Just ignore whatever they said." Zayan laughs and says, "That's fine. I know kids can say the weirdest things ever because I have niblings too."

I say, "Thanks for understanding. I still can't accept this", and Haya joins in with, "Yeah, we don't need this—" and I start feeling happy that at least one person is on my side, when she completes it with "because this chocolate box doesn't have our favorite Kinder Joy."

I shake my head and do a facepalm because I don't even know what to say anymore. This is possibly the most embarrassing day of my life!

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Children can be so weird, isn't it? 😂
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