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*** Vance's POV***

"So, I had to give myself the closure I needed. I wrote the letter." Karis describes the final moments leading up to her return to our presence.

"Did you mail it?" Finn casually asks the question that has been building up in my own mind. My curiosity is genuinely the most selfish of emotions.

"I did. It's funny. I thought I would need his reaction to the letter in order to feel like the chapter is finished. Instead, I apparently just wanted to say the words that had been freely living in my mind. I didn't say them, to speak. However, I found that communicating my disappointment in what we lost was more than enough to help me let go." Karis sends a forced smile my way.

I can feel the twinge of jealousy that seems to want to roar out of me ferociously. I tamper down the arrogance while trying to fathom what the words "we lost" really mean. Does Karis still feel loss? Why? Have I not done enough to erase the soiled memories of what could have been, had her marriage been more successful?

"It's not about you. I know that seems a misgiving considering that you are very much a part of her story. But, this is about Karis. Let it be about her journey to self- discovery." Rex whispers from across the bar top to me.

I nod in acceptance. I don't feel very proud for how I automatically associated the last few months events to my own failure. I'm not a narcissist. I know that Karis had a life before me. I just wish that I had come in to her story earlier. I feel like we could have been so much further had Christopher never been the villain.

"Do you feel better?" Finn reaches over, grabbing Karis' hand gently. The small gesture brings a nod of reassurance from my beautiful love's face.

"Then, that is all that matters." It is the softness in my voice that makes me proud. I am able to push away the months of torture to find the only thing that matters, Karis' happiness.

"I am hungry. I have not been able to do much in the way of eating. This has been taxing on my emotions." Karis admits shyly.

I can tell. Karis is a gorgeous and voluptuous woman. I did not miss the way her clothes were failing to cling to her curves as she approached us earlier. She could definitely use a little bit more meat on her bones.

"Then it is settled, we shall go down to the diner." Rex pushes away from the bar, annoyingly allowing the bar stool to scrape across the concrete flooring. I roll my eyes. Why must he be so loud?

We choose to walk. Rex chatters along the way. As he excitedly walks beside Finn and Karis, Rex rambles about, letting Karis catch up on all the little things she missed. Rex explains how much we have upgraded the rooms at the club. I try to search for any signs that Karis is willing to step back into our past roles, however I find myself just as answerless as when she was not here.

Karis doesn't say anything directly to me. Instead, she lets Rex continue talking for what seems like forever. Finn softly reminds his husband to calm down with his masculine touch upon the small of Rex's back. Karis waits patiently for every single useless detail as Rex devours the undivided attention.

We take our seat at the small diner, Karis sits beside me but is still too far away from me for my personal preference. Rex talks across the table allowing Karis to listen at her own pace. My mind races with wild ideas of what Karis may be thinking about. A few months ago, I would not need to wonder what my Karis was thinking, I would know through her body language. As it stands, I am out of touch with Karis to an uncomfortable degree. I cannot say that I like it. I do not.

"Let's talk outside." Finn ushers me to follow him as he stands and begins heading out of the diner and towards the street. I reluctantly walk behind him, wondering why we need a private conversation.

As we make it through the door, I find myself staring through the window at Rex and Karis. I see that they are much the same as they were when we stepped away. Karis is still inventively listening while Rex goes on like a chatterbox.

"You have to give her time." Finn chastises me lightly. I agree but, it is not in my nature to have to be so patient.

"I know." I grip the bridge of my nose between my thumb and forefinger. It is not as if I do not know. How do you tell your soul to quit starving when you already know what it feels like to be so full?

"Patience. She will come." Finn gives small breaths of relief to my tired soul. I would be lost without his encouragement.

"I thought I had been patient." I joke solemnly. This has been terrifying. I am so unused to being on the other side of disappointment. I guess I would call myself lucky.

"Let's fill her belly. Then, we can make a plan to bring her back into your arms. We are all on your side. We have to do what is best for Karis, though. You have to take a back seat." Finn fills me with his advice that is likely based on experience. Lord knows that Rex had spun him through the ringer more than once over the years.

"Acceptable." I give in. I'm not a relationship expert. I would be stupid not to trust my best friend.

"So, we are going to go in there, let things flow naturally and eat. Just comfort Karis when necessary." Finn pats me on the back as he moves again towards the door.

Agreeing silently, I move towards the door as well. Karis is missing from the table as we approach. I look to Rex who points towards the bathroom hall. I nod in confirmation before taking my seat in my own chair.

When Karis returns, I stand up, pulling the chair out so that my China doll can once again claim her seat. With a soft thank you, Karis sits beside me. She leaves ample space between us while reassuring me by turning slightly in so that I can feel the heat from her body, warming my desperate soul.

"Vance?" I hear a female voice call for me. Looking at Karis, she shakes her head while pushing her thumb behind her shoulder. The gesture brings my attention to a woman whom I had not seen for years.

"It is you. Oh my God, it's been ages." The tall brunette, skinnier than I remembered, rushes towards our table with her red heels clicking loudly against the tile diner floor.

As I am a gentleman, I excuse myself from the table to stand up. Turning towards her, I get a flood of memories that have always left a sour taste in my mouth.

"It is so good to see you." The woman, Catherine, pulls me into a hug as I awkwardly bend down to compensate for the difference in our heights.

Pulling back, I stare at her. I do not exactly understand the tone in which she speaks. We did not necessarily part on bad terms but there was definitely a clear line of mutual disdain upon our departure.

"What are you doing here?" I ask. The curtness of my tone is not lost on me. I just honestly am unsure why we are even speaking.

"I am launching an ad for People Magazine. You know, fastest growing companies, rising CEO's, all that jazz." Catherine immediately reminds me of one of my complaints with her. She talks like a teenager even though she is in her mid-forties.

"Staying busy?" I question politely. I wish she were too busy to be taking time away from Karis, at the moment. I have things I could be doing that would make me happier.

"Always." She giggles melodically, showing yet another one of her quirks. School girls giggle. Middle aged women laugh. She's annoying.

"How are your sister and brother? Tell them I say hi. I miss them and think of them often?" Catherine gushes while grating my nerves. She met them ONCE, one single fucking time. They were not close. They didn't even like her. She is obviously delusional.

"Good. Look, I have to get going." I put my hand on her forearm while spinning her towards the counter. I begin walking back, hoping that I am not being terribly rude. I am, after all, a public face in town.

"Vance? I was going to ask." Catherine finds her way in front of me once again, blocking me from my intended purpose of returning to Karis' side.

"Yes?" I groan out in irritation.

"Here's my number. We should do dinner; catch up; you know, for old times' sake." Catherine looks at me expectantly. I bet she won't expect this.

"I'm busy." I announce.

"I didn't say when." Catherine giggles as if I missed the substantial punchline in a silent joke.

"It doesn't matter. I am uninterested. I have too much to do." This time, I move back towards the table, leaving the lady waiting on an explanation. I haven't gotten one and I do not intend to provide one. I don't have to.

I can hear the 'humph' come from Catherine as she breathes heavily through her nostrils. It is just another example of why we are not together. She is so uncouthly. She is just unashamedly obnoxious.

Finally, back to my seat, I scan the table for anyone that may be upset by my departure. It is Rex who is staring at me like I have questions to answer. I expect it. Rex and Finn know the whole damn story of the one time I allowed somebody to crush me for no fucking reason. Catherine drug me around like a dog on a leash. It was early on in my dominant career. I felt the need to please her, even though she was supposed to be my submissive. I have never made that mistake again. I am definitely cognizant of my sub's restrictions, feelings and tastes, but I stand as the dominant.

"Who was that?" The soft whisper from Karis brings me back to the present. I look over at her as I feel sweat beginning to bead in my eyebrows.

"The past." I frantically spit out. Shit, I was just as shocked as everyone else to have this trip down memory lane.

"I gathered." Karis dismisses my dismissal. I assume it was not a good enough answer.

"Catherine DuFonte." Flynn exposes the treacherous name.

"Oh." Karis moves her body to put even more space in between us. I can feel the pain of the distance immediately. This is not moving in the right direction.

"She's an old fling. Nothing more." I state adamantly.

"I see." Karis picks her fork up to move the food around on her plate. I groan. I am so fucking up, big time.

"Later." I clarify. "I will explain anything you wish to know." I write a check that I know my ass can cash. I will tell Karis every embarrassing detail of my past if it guarantees me a future with her. She is worth the pain. She has always been, and will always be, worth the pain.

"It's okay." Karis pushes her seat back. She stands up. Her face betrays her soft tone. I can tell she is disappointed. I see how much she wants to know. I have a feeling she doesn't feel as though she deserves an answer. She is wrong. I will tell her.

"Let's go." Rex throws down a bill on top of the ticket that lays on the table. Taking one last sip of his coke, he puts the glass down. Karis walks ahead of our group as I move away from the table.

"She is in a weird place." Finn reassures me while walking beside me.

"This is so fucking awkward. I am so out of my element." I whisper quietly to my confidant.

"Patience. The ship may be docked but, it has not sunk. Just let it set sail at a natural pace."
  Finn pats my back before sliding his arm around my shoulder.

I want to huff. I want to throw a tantrum. I want to run ten miles to get to whatever place we need to be in order to make everything return to what it was. I know I can't. That is the issue. I am somewhere I do not want to be. I have no control over anything. I just have to wait. I don't want to. I will though.

We quietly walk back towards the club. All the while, my mind goes back and forth between memories with Karis from our short past, memories of Catherine from so long ago and dreams of what could be. I just want to sail. I do not want to be docked.