𝐰𝐡𝐲 𝐢𝐬 𝗺𝐲 𝐟𝐚𝗺𝐢𝐥𝐲 𝐬𝗼 𝐰𝐞𝐢𝐫𝐝? 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐡𝗼𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐥𝐲. 𝐭𝗼𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐰𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐬𝗼𝗺𝐞 𝗼𝐝𝐝-𝐚𝐬𝐬 𝐜𝗼𝐧𝐯𝗼𝐬. 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞, 𝐢'𝐥𝐥 𝐬𝐡𝗼𝐰 𝐲'𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢 𝐫𝐞𝗺𝐞𝗺𝐛𝐞𝐫

my mom, while doing sister 3's hair: could you please stop farting?

sister 3: well, it's better out than in, they say! ;)

~

sister 2: well, you see, I'm a trash lemur, sister 3 is a trash panda, my parents are trash rabbits and *points to me* she's just trash

sister 1: well what am I?

me: a trash rag

sister 2's bf (who i strongly dislike for undisclosed reasons): and me?

me: you're not part of this family; you're the whole dump >:(

~

sister 1: ah yes. i love washing spoons.

me: uh,,,, why??

sister 1: because you wash them and they wash you back :)

~

sister 1: *odd wailing sounds*

sister 2: you sound like a dying person

me, not looking up from my steak: no, people don't sound like that when they die

sister 2's bf: um how do you know that?!

me: *slowly looks up from food and meets his eyes* (•̀ᴗ•́)

~
𝐲𝐞𝐬, 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝗼𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐝.