33
(Whatsapp)
(K/DA universe)
(this is a continue of page 29.)
Kai'sa: girls, why is my head trying to kill me?
Grey: Kai'sa, are you okay?
Kai'sa: wait, Grey?
Kai'sa: what are you doing in our groupchat?
Grey: you added me.
Kai'sa: when?
Grey: last night.
Kai'sa: speaking of last night, can you tell me what happened?
Grey: what do you remember?
Kai'sa: I don't remember anything, and my head is killing me.
Grey: That's easy to explain.
Grey: you went out drinking with Evelynn.
Kai'sa: I did?
Kai'sa: why would I do that? That sounds like the exact opposite of being the responsible one.
Grey: that's what I've been saying.
Grey: also, Evelynn apparently slipped something in your drinks.
Kai'sa: great.
Kai'sa: okay, I'm at our living room, and things are pretty weird.
Kai'sa: (well, weirder than usual.)
Kai'sa: Evelynn is making breakfast in her underwear, for some reason.
Kai'sa: what's weird is the fact she's making breakfast, not that she's in her underwear.
Kai'sa: and Ahri is on the couch with tears in her eyes while wearing a big sweater that say "I've been bad, so affection is forbidden until forgiven."
Grey: well, to put it simply, you and a drunk Evelynn had the "ingenious" idea to Kidnap Akali, and you managed to convince Ahri to go with it.
Kai'sa: wait, WHAT!?
Akali: yeah, I'm here, too.
Kai'sa: Akali, did we really do it!?
Akali: yeah.
Akali: I'm in Evelynn's bed right now.
Akali: naked.
Akali: WHY AM I IN EVELYNN'S BED AND NAKED!?!?
Kai'sa: wait, don't you remember what happened?
Akali: no! Evelynn knocked me out again!
Evelynn: you're in my bed naked because I was drunk and my mind was filled with our fan art.
Akali: DID YOU RAPE ME!?!?!?
Evelynn: it's not rape if the other person kept screaming "more" while they were unconscious.
Grey: calm down, she didn't touch you.
Grey: I was there when they let you go.
Grey: she just decided to leave you naked on her bed and sleep on the couch, because she wanted you to think that you two did it last night.
Kai'sa: oh thank god!
Kai'sa: Kidnapping was already bad enough, I did not want rape along with that.
Akali: Evelynn, I'm going to throttle you.
Evelynn: please do.
Evelynn: (I'm into both S and M, honey.)
Akali: f*ck.
Ahri: am I forgiven yet?
Grey: no.
Kai'sa: Ahri, how can you just let us do this?
Ahri: I had to avenge Kiko!
Kai'sa: who?
Ahri: my beloved stuffed animal that Akali threw into the dogs.
Kai'sa: wait, how do you know about that?
Akali: since you're such a "good friend", you ratted me out.
Kai'sa: shit.
Kai'sa: sorry for keeping that from you, Ahri.
Grey: don't apologize to her. Affection is forbidden, remember?
Ahri: I'm sorry.
Kai'sa: I'm still trying to comprehend the fact I agreed to go out drinking with Evelynn.
Grey: that's something I'm not buying.
Grey: Evelynn, are you hiding something other than what you put in Kai'sa's drink?
Evelynn: since I already know that none of you will believe that she just willingly came with me.
Evelynn: I MIGHT have blackmailed her with a few embarrassing photos, saying that I'll show them to Sivir if she doesn't come along.
Grey: seriously?
Kai'sa: I hate you.
Evelynn: love you, too, sweety.
Ahri: am I forgiven yet?
Grey: no.
Kai'sa: okay, so, how bad is the situation?
Kai'sa: are we in trouble?
Grey: let me show you.
Grey has added Caitlyn to the Groupchat.
Caitlyn: who is this? And how did you get this number?
Grey: it's me, Caitlyn.
Caitlyn: Grey?
Caitlyn: what is this?
Grey: this is the groupchat of the K/DA group.
Ahri: hi.
Evelynn: how's it hanging?
Caitlyn: do you b*tches realize how much trouble you caused?
Caitlyn: not just for the police station, but for Grey too.
Akali: I was also kidnapped.
Caitlyn: and this idiot was also kidnapped.
Kai'sa: that's what I'm wondering.
Kai'sa: how much trouble are we in?
Caitlyn: well, let's see.
Caitlyn: first, there's the fact that you kidnapped someone.
Caitlyn: second, there's also the fact that we got a bar tender that says he witnessed Evelynn drugging one of your own members.
Caitlyn: and lastly, there's also the fact that Evelynn broke half the rules of the road while driving last night.
Caitlyn: while driving while texting, might I add.
Akali: Evelynn also sort of sexually harassed me.
Caitlyn: don't worry. Evelynn's name is pretty much synonyms to "sexual harassment" in the police station.
Kai'sa: so... We're in pretty big trouble?
Caitlyn: saying that you're in "big" trouble is like saying Sona's boobs are normal sized.
Ahri: wow, that's one hell of an understatement.
Caitlyn: Grey had to literally BEG us to not arrest you.
Caitlyn: captain Volibear was two seconds from heading towards your house and smashing through the wall.
Ahri: (you begged for my sake? :3)
Grey: (that's the last nice thing you'll be receiving from me in a while.)
Ahri: (I'm sorry.)
Grey: Caitlyn, I'd like to ask, has Tiara ever done something like this?
Caitlyn: Ha! Hell no!
Caitlyn: not even when she, Vi, and Sett went drinking together.
Caitlyn: in other words, you idiots crossed a line even Tiara wouldn't cross.
Kai'sa: damn.
Kai'sa: omg, when my dad hears about this, I'm going to be in so much trouble.
Caitlyn: luckily for you, none of you will be arrested, thanks to Grey.
Caitlyn: so, if I was in place of you b*tches, I'd look for a way to not only make up for all the trouble you caused, but also for a way to thank him.
Caitlyn: also, he'll be deciding your punishment.
Caitlyn: later, hoes.
Caitlyn has left the groupchat.
Kai'sa: Grey, are you mad at us?
Grey: yes, yes I am.
Kai'sa: figure as much.
Grey: also, you're ALL included in punishment.
Akali: wait, what did I do!?
Grey: apparently, there has been this famous rapper who kept painting on walls without authorization.
Grey: witnesses' description matches your looks.
Akali: f*ck.
Grey: so, for the punishments.
Grey: Kai'sa, you're grounded.
Grey: just grounded and nothing else, since this was mostly against your will.
Kai'sa: I guess that's fair.
Grey: Akali, you're also grounded, but in your old room at the K/DA's house.
Akali: but I have nothing there.
Akali: they burned my stuff, remember?
Grey: I'm well aware of that.
Akali: >:(
Grey: Ahri, your sweater is staying, and your ice-cream sundae supply is going to be taken.
Ahri: I'm sorry.
Grey: Evelynn, I'm confiscating your car collection.
Evelynn: don't you dare touch my cars or I stg!
Grey: or what, Evelynn? What are you going to do?
Grey: I can kill 10 times over with my hands tied behind my back and a blindfold over my eyes.
Grey: so, I ask again, what are you going to do about me taking your cars?
Evelynn: rant about you on Twitter?
Grey: you know, last week I was talking to Sona.
Grey: and she suggested that me and her just drop everything and run away together to a tropical island where it would be just me and her.
Grey: that way we would live the rest of our lives together away from the world and away from trouble.
Grey: honestly, that offer sound very tempting at this point.
Ahri: PLEASE DON'T LEAVE ME FOR SONA!
Ahri: I can't compete with her!
Ahri: the only thing I have on her is the fact I can speak.
Grey: then get a hold of your group.
Grey: and I'm being serious, Ahri, I don't want to have to leave YOU because something YOUR TEAMMATES did.
Ahri: I'm sorry!
Ahri: I swear I'll be a better leader.
Grey: I hope so.
Grey: see you later.
Grey has left the groupchat.
Ahri: okay, you wh*res better clean your act or I stg I'll torture you to death.
Evelynn: rude much.
Ahri: especially you, Evelynn.
Ahri: Eve, I swear if I lose my boyfriend because of you, I'm going to tie you up, throw you inside one of your cars, put a brick on the gas pedal, and direct you straight to the heart of the Void.
Kai'sa: I'd help.
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