Ello, it's been uhhh nearly a year, I did actually get through week 2 I just never uploaded it. I'm not sure if I'll be sticking around, I have a strange relationship with mythical stuff. How I use and relate to mythical stuff kinda makes me understand why people want to believe in something like religion, it also reminds me why i just can't. I like believing in it, it's fun, and it honestly helps me a lot to have some future goal or thing that'll make everything better just once I reach it. The community that comes with it is also really lovely. But in the end reality always ends up being more urgent and important than the escapism of an eventually, and my focus gets tugged away until I just genuinely forget about it.

I'll probably always keep coming back here to try again, and I'll keep y'all posted of any progress. Because I do genuinely believe in mythicals to an extent, even if it's in more of a reality shifting way, where by achieving your results you have shifted to a reality wherein it's physically possible. Not entirely, but I lean to that direction for how I believe it's possible. It's just how I interact with mythicals is something I've realized isn't suitable to long term commitment honestly, planning my whole future around a maybe when you have nothing works great, but when you actually have something you want to do in the future, it more so just gets in the way.

I don't know, I'll probably keep coming back to it, I really do, whenever I think about it feel a deep want and need to just have wings and be able to fly, that's part of the reason I can't interact with that want long term, because indulging it just makes me want to everything else on hold, and then responsibility comes knocking. So who knows how long I'll be here this time. But I just kinda wanted to talk about this a bit, I'm curious if any of you have similar thoughts to the whole mythical thing, I really care about it and want it, but it just conflicts with actively living and being present for me and how I use it.

But for now honestly, I think I might listen to a few subliminals again while I proofread an essay.

Hope you all are doing well, have a lovely day. <3