A/N: Peter does his bullshit and no one knows at all. Not even Ned and Mj.

So basically Peter is actually competent at keeping his identity.

This is basically Intern Peter messing with the Avengers.

.........

Peter had worked with the Avengers for years, ever since he was 14. Somehow, against all odds, they still didn't know who he was.

Somehow.

He'd gotten suit upgrades and had worked and trained with all the avengers. He wore civilian clothes all the time. He just never ditched the mask.

No one seem bothered by it. They asked why he kept it on, but let it go.

Now, 20 years old and they still never knew.

Shocking.

Peter actually worked as an intern there too. He applied right out of high school and became the youngest intern at SI.

He knew the building exceptionally well, even in areas he shouldn't know about as an intern.

One day, someone dropped files on his desk. "Can you deliver this to Stark for me?"

Peter glanced at the owner of the voice, finding his boss, looking stressed beyond belief. "You look like shit."

"Yeah, which is why you need to turn these in for me."

"Alright."

Peter scooped up the documents and headed to the elevator. His boss was too tired to realize he never told Peter where to go.

When Peter entered the elevator, FRIDAY seemed amused.

"Peter Parker, glad to see you again. Where to?" Her metallic voice hummed.

"Mr. Stark please."

FRIDAY definitely knew. She never told anyone and it was all to funny too Peter that she didn't. "Gladly. He's in his lab, so have fun."

"Will do."

When he got to the floor, he navigated it without any trouble, coming upon Tony in his personal lab.

Thank god his hero worship never stuck, because his idol was a mess. Still his idol though.

Tony looked tired as hell, grease stained his clothes and honestly, Peter didn't know if the man had bothered to shower or sleep in the past week.

He didn't knock, just walked in and slammed papers down in front of the man, who startled and fell out of his chair.

Peter held back a laugh. "Head of R&D was a bit busy and asked me to deliver these to you," Peter informed.

"Friday! Why didn't you warn me?" Tony asked.

"There was no need to." Her calming voice responded, amused.

Peter simply smiled, "by the way, I'd recommend some sleep and a shower before you got to that."

Tony looked at Peter, brows furrowed. "Who are you?"

"Peter Parker. Intern at R&D."

"Where do you you go to school?"

"Graduated from MIT."

Tony stared at him, "and you're only an intern?"

Peter shrugged, "it's a paid internship. Once it's over I can apply for a job."

Tony raised an eyebrow at the boy, "alright. Well, guess I'll sleep. Why don't you grab yourself a coffee from the kitchen before you head back."

"Oh, thanks. Sleep well." Peter left immediately.

Tony was too tired to call the boy out on knowing where to go, but he was definitely confused as to why the boy didn't ask for directions.

Not his problem. He needed to try and sleep.

Peter made his way to the kitchen and heard Avengers in there before nearing it.

Oh well, just act like you belong.

Though, unsurprisingly, when Peter walked in, heads snapped his way. He should've expected that.

They tended and Peter sighed.

"Look, I'm just an intern here. My boss asked me to give Mr. Stark some documents and Mr. Stark said I could grab a coffee before going back to work. Don't mind me."

Natasha watched Peter, and relaxed. When she relaxed, so did the others. Peter smiled thankfully and started making coffee.

He knew the Avengers were still eyeing him.

"How busy is the R&D department that they have to send an intern?" Bucky muttered. Natasha, Clint, Wanda and him were the only ones on the team that spoke Russian, so only they understood.

But so did Peter.

"My boss has huge bags under his eyes and the entire team is one mistake away from having a complete breakdown."

Natasha tensed again, "you speak Russian?"

Peter nodded as he waited for his coffee to brew. "I do. I also speak ASL, Slovakian, Wakandan, Italian, Spanish, Korean, and a little French. Never really stuck with it though."

"Why?" Steve pressed.

"Oh, the people in my area are from heavy Italian and Spanish backgrounds, so it was easy to pick up. ASL is just an essential to me since a lot of people are hard of hearing. I learned Slovakian and Wakandan because I was curious about the languages when the countries ended up in the news. I learned Russian because the alphabet is cool. Korean because the language is one of the easiest to learn. I learned French in high school."

"The alphabet?" Natasha prodded, a snort escaping her.

"That and I do work in the Stark Tower. If I ever ran into you or any of the others, Clint, Bucky or Wanda, it would be fun to have a conversation in Russian."

"Fan of the Avengers?"

Peter smiled fondly, "of course. More a fan of Bruce Banner and Tony Stark, but all of you are great people."

Peter's coffee finished and he poured himself a cup. For some reason Stark had styrofoam cups. Peter didn't mind and poured his coffee. He was about to leave when he noticed something on the ground.

"Is Thor on Midgard?"

Clint shook his head, "no, why?"

Peter smiled internally. He knew he could pick up the hammer after doing it by accident once. No one saw him do it, so...

"He left his hammer thing here." Sure enough, Peter held the Hammer up for the others to see. They were all a bit shell shocked. "I'll just set it here." He set it on the counter. "I need to get back to work. Nice meeting you all. Sad Dr. Banner wasn't with you guys."

Peter left.

Suddenly, all the Avengers were aware they didn't even know the intern's name. They'd have to a-

"Mr. Stark is sleeping. Mr. Parker convinced boss to get some sleep, so I'd ask that you'd avoid waking him. The intern is Peter Parker." Friday warned/informed

Peter Parker.

Huh.

A week later and Peter was doing his job as usual, a bit tired from patrol, but still working as usual. That is, until his boss approached him again.

"Parker... how?"

Peter shot his boss a look, brows almost knit together. "What?"

"You apparently impressed Stark last week. I don't know how, but you did. Now he wants to see you in action."

"Huh. All I did was tell him to get some sleep before reading the documents."

"Really?"

"Yes really."

His boss shook his head with a sigh. "Either way. He wants to see what you can do. So for the next week, you'll be interning for Stark."

Peter nodded and his boss sent him on his way.

Soon he was back in the elevator and FRIDAY seemed amused.

"Are you still planning on your original plan?" She joked.

Peter snorted, smiling, "yeah. I can imagine how shocked they'll be. For now, still just your average intern."

"I think they'll be shocked at how old you were when you became a hero."

"Indeed."

Peter and FRIDAY really got along well. He was always thankful for the motherly AI. Karen was also very motherly, but FRIDAY had more life to her. Karen was more of a protective AI by design.

"We have arrived. Boss is in the common room, I'll notify him of your arrival."

Peter nodded and left the elevator and made his way towards the common room. He heard the Avengers talking before he got close.

"I just want to see what this kid can do. I looked at all the projects he worked on in R&D and it's honestly impressive," Tony informed.

"He could be a breach to security!" Steve argued back.

Peter smiled to himself as he walked in, "I'm great with secrets!"

The two jolted. "Damn, you're fast."

"You don't have to worry Mr. Rodgers, I'm not one to expose secrets."

"How can we trust you?" He asked.

Peter knew how to mess with the Avengers very easily. "I mean, ask Spider-Man. Me and him worked on the first few designs of the web shooter. Had to kinda see his face to work with him."

Everyone in the room stiffened.

"What?"

"Yeah. He came to me after his spider bite and asked for help. We're both into biochemistry, and worked on the first designs together. I still have the blueprints if you want proof." Peter paused, "it does contain the original web formula, so I'm wary about showing it."

"We can just ask him, don't worry kid. I believe you anyways," Tony assured. Peter smiled kindly.

"How'd you meet Spider-Man?" Steve questioned.

Peter quirked a brow, "well. I met him in school. Can't say what year though. I will say that both of us hate Oscorp with a burning passion."

"Why is that?"

"How he got his powers. Spider there escaped and bit him."

The Avengers grimaced at the idea. They must've realized the pain it would've been.

"Why do you hate it?"

"Oh, my parents died there and Norman is an abusive asshole."

That was... what?

"What?"

Peter smiled awkwardly, "Uh, my parents worked there. During an experiment, they died. It could've been prevented if Norman actually cared about safety concerns."

Stark wanted to snicker, but restrained himself. "He really doesn't. Why do you call him Norman by the way?"

Peter grimaced, "because he's my soon to be father-in-law."

Holy sh-

"Yeah, it's unpleasant for everyone involved. Harry hates his dad as much as I hate his dad."

This kid just kept getting more interesting.

"Anyways, my boss said I'll be interning you for the week."

Tony nodded, "I want to see what you can do."

"Alright..."

Peter was ushered out and the Avengers remaining were left to their thoughts.

"So, I heard your lifted Thor's hammer. Mjolnir I believe."

"Is there something special about doing so?" Peter asked.

Tony hummed, "it means you can be king of Asgard. You're worthy of doing so."

"Oh, that's neat."

"You already knew, didn't you?"

Peter snickered, "yeah, I did. I didn't think I could lift it though."

There was something familiar about Peter, and something warm. No wonder this kid and Spider-Man got along, they were a lot alike.

Oh well.

Peter dropped by as Spider-Man that night.

Mostly to be a little shit.

He swung right on in. Swung in on a conversation about him. Well, Peter, but still him.

"Oh, Spider-Man! Do you know a guy named Peter Parker?" Tony asked. 

Peter was grinning under his mask. "Yeah. Went to high school with the kid. Worked on my web shooters together before I met you guys. Why?"

"He works as an intern here."

"I know. He talked about applying for the internship as soon as he could. He's been working here since he turned eighteen."

"Right, you would know."

"Why are you talking about him by the way?"

Tony sighed, "he's interning for me for the week and the kid is interesting. His projects, being able to lift Thor's hammer, being engaged to an Osborne..."

"Could've been black cat. They were dating for awhile."

The avengers looked at Spider-Man completely baffled.

"He what?" Clint got out.

Peter held back a snicker. God this was entertaining. "Black cat? They dated for a couple years. No, just a year."

"Why?" Tony muttered.

Peter shrugged, "she dropped crime while they dated. So he didn't see a problem I guess."

Peter could see the Avengers were even more curious about him.

God it felt great to be trolling the Avengers.

"What brings you here Spidey?" Tony asked.

Peter smirked under the mask, "my birthday is coming up, and I plan on going public with my identity by then."

Wanda sighed, "are you doing this on purpose?"

"Messing with you guys, yeah. It's all true, but the timing is definitely needed."

They all groaned and Peter snickered.

"Peter's birthday is near mine as well, so maybe you guys can mess with him. Doubt you'll faze him much, but maybe."

The avengers shared a look, plans forming.

Peter's work was done.

"Anyways, I just dropped by to tell you about the reveal thing. I've got work in the morning, so I'll see you guys around."

"See you Spidey."

Peter was well aware that tony was staring at him as he worked on the project in front of him.

The iron man suit.

Tony wanted to see if he could add upgrades or improve the suit without his guidance and Peter was drawing up blueprints.

He was actually making minor improvements in the blueprints, but it was clear he had bigger ideas, he just needed to make sure they'd all fit.

And tony was impressed.

Peter seemed to completely understand Tony's thought process and worked with it, and not against it.

Tony almost forgot the Avengers were forming plans to mess with him on his birthday.

Peter decided to go to the break room on his floor because the Avengers had an emergency meeting.

Probably about how to mess with Peter.

So he went to the break room without being noticed and brewed himself a cup of coffee.

It wasn't too long before his boss walked in, being startled by Peter's presence. "Parker? Why are you down here?"

"Avengers are holding a meeting, so I decided to get some coffee."

His boss smiled at him. "Well, if all goes well, you'll probably be a regular employee and not just an intern."

"Let's hope," Peter said with a chuckle, holding up his coffee like a cheer before bringing it to his lips for a sip.

"I heard you were engaged as well. I never see you with the ring on."

Peter shrugged, "it's sorta a hazard in the workplace, so I put it in my pocket." Peter reached in his pocket and pulled his ring out.

His boss whistled at the gold band, "looks quite nice. Hope you and your fiancé are very happy together."

"Thanks."

"When's the wedding?" He asked.

"It's actually next spring. We want it sooner, but we're both gonna be busy until then, so we decided for a spring wedding."

"Either way congrats. You talk about your boyfriend all the time, so I'm glad you said yes."

"I am too. Harry is a good guy."

They both smiled and Peter took another sip of his coffee, leaning against the wall. "My life is going to change a lot, and I'm not sure I'm ready, but I'm excited either way."

"Marriage does that too you."

Peter nodded, but he wasn't talking about marriage in this case. Sorta was, but mostly, he wasn't. Not that his boss knew.

He was ready to marry Harry. He wasn't sure about everything else, only time would tell.

The common room was quiet when Peter got back, so he sat on the couch and pulled out a workbook to work on projects.

He was working on them for quite a bit when he sensed someone creeping behind him. He pretended not to sense them, and the many more people creeping up as he felt two hands suddenly on his shoulders.

He didn't react much, just continued to work, "you guys have master assassins and you can't even startle an intern," he said with a snort, a smile on his face. He turned around, seeing tony behind him, the others not to far behind him.

"I tried."

"Anyways, am I needed for anything else, or?"

The avengers looked at each other and tony looked at Peter, "not really, but were about to watch a few movies. Want to stick around for one or two?"

Peter looked surprised by the offer. "Uh, sure! If you'll have me."

And over the course of the movies they all watched together, the Avengers ditched their plans to mess with Peter, their hearts melting over the boy who seemed so sweet and ridiculous. Sure he was mysterious and also strange, but they all felt this strong urge to protect him.

The next day, Peter got a note from Pepper that informed him that once his internship was over, he'd be hired full time as an employee.

All the out her interns took him out to celebrate, even his boss.

He was a genius who deserved the job after all.

And things were falling into place.

Peter asked Tony as Spider-Man to arrange a press conference for him for August 10th.

Tony agreed, forgetting about Spider-Man revealing himself.

August 10th rolled around and everyone was anticipating the press conference.

Peter was just excited.

"Do you feel like this might be overshadowing your birthday?" A coworker asked him.

"No. After all, it's not like it will change that today is my birthday."

And he went about his day, disappearing right before the conference...

"I bet you wonder what this conference is about," Tony said boldly, "but I don't know myself. Spider-Man asked me to call it for him, so I'll let him answer your questions."

Peter took the stand in his suit, a bit nervous. "Hi," he started. "I thought it was time to answer some of the biggest questions I get asked. So, what are you dying to know?"

Peter pointed time a nearby reporter.

"How old were you when you became Spider-Man?"

A great question. "I was hoping for that question because FRIDAY and I joke about it," Peter snickered. "As we all know, I've been Spider-Man for six years, actually, seven years now, and I started when I was fourteen. Believe it or not."

What?

The Avengers, the press, everyone watching just... was open mouthed in shock.

Another reporter shakily raised their hand, "why did you become Spider-Man?"

Peter sighed, "well, I got bitten by a radioactive spider at Oscorp during a field trip and was getting pretty happy with my powers, but then, my uncle lectured me about how I was acting and not like myself. We fought and then, I turned my back and he got shot. I couldn't save him. I could've if I wasn't acting the way I was, if I was trained, if I was there." Peter took a deep breath, "I don't want anyone to lose someone, and if I can help, I will. I have the power to, so I will, so no one loses family, or anyone."

Again... wow.

Another reporter put a hand up, "just exactly who are you?"

Peter smiled under his mask, "well, I'm a twenty year old scientist, twenty one actually, today is my birthday. I went to Midtown high school, am orphaned and have Tony Stark's name saved in my phone as Iron dad as a joke. Peter pulled off his masked and stared at the crowd. "And I'm Peter Parker, intern at Stark industries and the biggest troll considering the Avengers had no idea who I was."

What?

Holy shit.

It all made sense.

"Who now?" A reporter asked.

"Why?" Peter chuckled, "because I'm not worried about people treating me different anymore. I'm engaged to the love of my life Harry Osborne, I got a job at Stark Industries through my own talent and hard work and well, I'm confident about protecting the people I care for. So that's why."

Peter grinned broadly at the reporters, confident for once.

"Did you say you're marrying Harry Osborne. Isn't that a conflict in interest?"

"Harry hates the company as much as I do. Should be fine."

Peter answered a few more questions before the conference call was over.

After it was over, Peter went to the Avengers common room with shocked Avengers.

"Peter, you are a little shit," Tony pointed out.

"Yeah," Peter snickered. "I was messing with you guys before I revealed myself. I knew the fourteen years old comment would shock everyone."

"Obviously? Because that's dangerous?" Steve exclaimed.

"Oh can it mr, 'I throw myself onto live grandes before I had the serum.' Don't be hypocritical."

"How do you-"

"Super hearing, remember?" He reminded casually.

"Well, I'm glad you're Spider-Man kid, there's no one better fit for the job," Tony assured kindly.

"Thank you. And now that you know who I am, It will be a lot easier working with me."

"Will you still be a little shit?"

"Absolutely."

"God damn it."

...........

A/N: finally finished this!