44. Another Walk Home
This is the first time Aurora holds hands with me publicly and confidently as we walk through the neighborhood. We take a longer route, not wanting to depart just yet, especially after everything that just occurred. We've got some of the heavy stuff out of the way, which leaves us room to simply just catch up after so long.
"How are classes going?" I ask.
"They're not too difficult yet, probably because I'm just a freshman," Aurora says. "I've already joined a few clubs and tried to make some friends in class. It's a little hard, since all my friends from high school moved away, but I'm managing. Don't look at me like that. You shouldn't feel guilty. I chose to stay here after all."
The thought still embarrasses me. Aurora gave up a private university, scholarships, for me? Even when we were deep in our argument?
"Where will you transfer?" I ask.
"That's still two years away. I can decide that later. To be honest, I was starting to wonder if I had made a mistake staying, that you would have moved on and wouldn't care to see me anymore. I'm glad I trusted my gut."
"I wish you'd have texted me or said something sooner. This past month...well, it's been fine. But school has been so lonely. I miss walking home with you every day," I tell her.
"We're walking home together today though," she says with a heartwarming smile.
"Why'd you cut your hair? I liked it longer."
"For the break-up," she teases. "No. I just wanted something fresh starting out college. I think I've had the same length since the beginning of high school, so I had to make a little bit of a change. But enough about me! How are you doing, Callie? How's senior year? And your parents and all that?"
I explain to her that my household situation has actually improved, and that I'm feeling a lot more comfortable being myself around my family. Even my mother has started to come around. It's still not 100% yet, and maybe it will never be, but it's definitely an improvement.
"I'm glad. It was hard for me when I came out to my parents midway through summer, but I'm glad they came around quicker than I thought they would. I think my mom is still betting on the fact I'll date a boy, considering that's all I've done in the past. They'll be in for a surprise, don't you think?"
"We're not telling your parents now, are we?" I ask, realizing suddenly that now we have the freedom to make our relationship public. That means telling our friends and family that we're a couple.
"Well, eventually, I suppose," Aurora thinks. "Sooner rather than later would be good, don't you think? I won't be able to hide this happiness long."
"Neither will I," I admit. "But soon. I agree. I'll have to tell my friends tomorrow though. Is that okay?"
"Yes. I'll tell my friends as well," Aurora agrees.
"I missed you," I admit. "This summer...it was awful. The job I had sucked, but all I thought about was you, even if I didn't want to. All I could think about was what I should and shouldn't have said, how I shouldn't have thrown our your graduation party invitation, how I should've apologized—"
Aurora squeezes my hand. "It's okay. I was regretting everything too." There's a pause in her speech. "The word about me has spread across school quickly, hasn't it?"
"You really surprised a lot of people. You had no idea how flustered I was today when Isabella asked if I knew about that."
"Isabella sits with you now?"
"Yes. You're lucky you came back, or I would've fallen deeply in love with her," I tease, though Aurora doesn't seem to find this that funny.
"To hell with that school anyway. I realized it was dumb to think of my reputation as soon as I graduated. It's not like I ended up as valedictorian anyway. Honestly, I don't care what my classmates from high school think these days. I just wished I had realized it sooner," Aurora admits.
"So...does this mean we can go on dates? Like official dates? And hold hands and kiss in public?"
Aurora seems as excited as me and nods.
"Where should we go for our first date?" I ask.
"Is this not a date?" she asks.
"This is just us," I argue.
"Well, I didn't really think about it. We'll have to look at our schedules. I'm working part-time now, but I've been trying to keep my evenings free," Aurora admits. "Can I get back to you when I get home?"
I nod. "I miss your cats. I used to see them from the window."
"They're both doing fine," Aurora assures me. "I miss your dog."
"You only met Fry once!"
"I still miss him...and your annoying siblings," Aurora teases. "I thought I'd lost all of that. I'm glad I was wrong."
We're starting to round the corner to my street now, and my heart sinks. But I realize suddenly that this isn't the end. Because after Aurora and I depart today, we will see each other from this point on. There's no uncertainty like before. We still have to plan our date after all, and I have to tell my friends and I suppose my family as well.
I can hear Fry barking out the window as we get to my house. I ask Aurora if she'd like to come in and see him, but she thinks it might be too early for that, considering we've just made up after months of not seeing each other. I expect her to wave good-bye like she normally does and fade away into the trees, but she grabs my wrist and presses the softest kiss to my lips, right outside my home. I am too lovestruck to think of who may be witnessing us from the window besides Fry.
"Good-bye," she says. "I'll text you. You still have my number, right?"
"Of course!" I say, waving as she leaves. "Love you." The words escape my mouth before I realize it, but Aurora turns and smiles before telling me she loves me too.
I am an energetic bundle of nerves as I walk up the porch. I take a few seconds to catch my breath and let out the tiniest squeal. I have a girlfriend. The thought is strange, and for many months, it seemed merely like a fantasy. I think of how my friends won't believe this when I tell them the next day. I know I won't be able to keep the secret long.
Olivia opens the front door before I even enter.
"Who was that?" she asks.
"Huh?"
"Who were you kissing out the window?" Olivia clarifies.
I make a garbled noise that doesn't resemble any sort of words. "Sh, sh, sh, sh," I say, waving my hands as she shuts the door behind her. We are both outside on the porch now, listening to Fry's whining from inside.
"Relax. Mom's upstairs, and Dad's not home yet. Besides, they know you're a lesbian anyway. Would they really be that surprised?"
"Um...it was Aurora," I admit as I twiddle my fingers together.
"I thought you two broke up! Didn't she move away?"
"She didn't leave the state for college apparently. She goes to community. And she came out, publicly, to everyone. She found me after school, and we talked," I admit.
"You're so flustered," Olivia teases. "I never thought I'd see you lose your cool."
"She asked me to be her girlfriend."
"And what did you say? Yes, of course?"
I nod.
"That's so exciting, Callie!" Olivia exclaims. "I really did think you'd die an old maid. My children will love having their cool lesbian aunts visit."
"She didn't propose to me!" I argue.
"What's happening?" Oliver asks, peeking his head out the porch. Fry squeezes through the door, and I grab ahold of his collar before he can prance after a nearby squirrel. He jumps onto me, showering my face in after-school licks.
"Callie has a girlfriend," Olivia tells him.
"What? Who?" Oliver asks.
"Aurora," I answer.
"Huh? But she—"
"She didn't go away to college. We made up. Just now," I say, patting Fry's head to distract myself from staring at my brother and sister directly. I'm sure I must be blushing up a storm.
"Callie and Aurora sitting in a tree. K-I-S-S—"
"Will you shut up, please?" I beg Olivia, but my siblings seem to take joy in mocking my embarrassment. Fry jumps up to give me one more lick, and I look at them directly. "No telling Mom and Dad yet, okay? I'm not sure how to break it to them. Aurora and I are planning to go on a date soon, and then...then I think I'll tell them."
"Sounds good to me," Olivia says. "I get to be a bridesmaid at your wedding, right?"
"We just started dating today!"
My siblings continue to laugh at and mock me before we head inside, and I suddenly remember the pile of homework I was working on at the coffee shop that still needs to be finished.
That evening is one of the most pleasant I've experienced in a while. I haven't been in this good of a mood in a long time, and I eat happily with my family and hum to myself in the shower for the first time in months. After I get out of the shower and into my comfiest pajamas, I notice a text from Aurora.
Good night, love. Ttyl.
She's never used an endearment before, so I'm practically squealing with excitement as I write back to her.
Good night. I love you. Let's talk again soon.
With the text sent, I find myself growing exhausted quickly. I fall asleep with my lamp still on, only waking up to turn it off in the middle of the night. It's the best sleep I've had in months.
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