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CHAPTER FIFTY FOUR - 🍂 ୧ there is. . .
a war out there ও🦌

AUTUMN WAS SAT ALONE IN HER and James's shared common room, her sketch pad clutched tightly in her hands. She stared at the blank page, her mind swirling with a mix of anxiety, curiosity, and fear.

She knew she had to draw, but she couldn't suppress the urges that seemed to consume her whenever she picked up a pencil. But the thought of what might happen when she gave in to those urges terrified her.

She took a deep, shaky breath and closed her eyes, trying to calm her racing thoughts. She could feel the whispers of ideas tugging at the edges of her mind, urging her to bring them to life on the page.

But she resisted. She clenched her fists, digging her nails into her palms as she fought against the compulsion to draw.

The more she struggled, the stronger the urges became. The images began to swirl more vividly, demanding her attention and begging to be released onto the page. She could almost see them in front of her, like shadows dancing at the edges of her vision.

Her breathing grew ragged, her heart racing with a mix of desperation and fear.

She forced her eyes open, staring down at the blank page and trying to focus on something, anything other than the overwhelming images in her mind.

But it was no use. The images were too strong, too insistent. The quill twitched in her hand, begging to be put to work. She clenched her jaw, resisting with every ounce of willpower she had left.

Her breath came in shaky gasps, her body trembling with the effort of holding back the torrent of creativity that threatened to consume her. The images became more vivid, more demanding as if they were taunting her with glimpses of the glorious creations they would produce if she just gave in.

The silence of the common room echoed in her ears, the sound of her ragged breathing and racing heart the only indication of the internal struggle she was facing. Her gaze was locked on the sketch pad, the blank page taunting her with its emptiness.

Unable to resist the compulsion, Autumn lowered her hand and began to draw.

As soon as the quill made contact with the paper, a rush of creativity and energy surged through Autumn's body. Her hand moved erratically, the lines forming the intricate patterns and shapes that she had been fighting so desperately to suppress.

The silence of the room was pierced by the sound of her laboured breathing and the frantic scratching of her quill against the page.

She felt a strange sense of relief as the images poured out of her, taking shape on the page and bringing her visions to life. It was as if a dam had burst inside her, allowing the flood of creativity to flow out and release the pent-up energy that had been building within her.

Her grip on the quill loosened slightly, a hint of a smile pulling at the corners of her mouth as she surrendered to the act of creation.

She lost track of time as she continued to sketch, the images flowing freely from her mind onto the page. Her hand moved of its own accord, the intricate patterns and shapes taking form before her eyes.

The fear and anxiety that had gripped her moments ago faded into the background, replaced by a sense of tranquillity and fulfilment as she surrendered to the creative process.

What felt like mere minutes to Autumn, had been hours of continuous drawing. Her friends grew increasingly frantic as they searched for her, unaware of her whereabouts until James suddenly remembered to check their shared common room.

With a pang of anxiety, James sprinted into the common room. The sight of Autumn surrounded by a multitude of drawings sent his worry skyrocketing.

His eyes widened as he took in the sight before him. Hundreds of drawings were scattered around the room, each one more detailed and vivid than the last. But it was the sight of Autumn, sitting in the centre of the maelstrom of creative chaos, that alarmed him.

He rushed forward, crouching down beside her and gently touching her shoulder. "Autumn," he said urgently, trying to get her attention. "Autumn, can you hear me?"

But Autumn was completely absorbed in her work, her eyes fixed on the page as she continued to draw. It was as if she was in a trance, her focus unshakeable and her mind completely occupied by the act of creation.

James's heart pounded in his chest, his worry for her mounting with each passing second. He grasped her arm gently, trying to get her to look at him. "Autumn, you need to snap out of it," he pleaded. "You've been drawing for hours. You have to stop."

Again, Autumn seemed oblivious to his presence, her hand moving across the page in swift, precise strokes. Panic seized James, his mind racing as he tried to figure out how to break her out of her trance.

He gently shook her, his voice growing more urgent. "Autumn, please, you have to stop," he said desperately. "You've drawn enough. You're scaring me."

But Autumn's focus was unbreakable. Her eyes were glazed over, her breathing barely perceptible as she continued her relentless drawing. It was as if she was caught in a fugue state, her mind entirely consumed by the creative process.

James's heart ached at the sight of her, his frustration mounting as he tried everything he could think of to break her out of it. He grabbed her shoulders, pulling her away from the sketch pad. "Snap out of it, damn it!" he shouted.

But even this didn't seem to have any effect. Autumn's body was limp in his grasp as if she was a puppet being controlled by some unseen force. Her eyes remained fixed on some invisible point in the distance, her mind locked in the world of her creation.

James was frantic now, desperation clawing at him as he tried to shake her back to reality. "Autumn, please," he pleaded, his voice hoarse with emotion. "You're frightening me. You have to come back to me."

But she was beyond his reach. She didn't respond to his touch or his pleading words. It was as if she had entered a completely different state of consciousness, one that was unreachable to the outside world.

James felt helpless, his heart racing as he tried to shake her harder. "Damn it, Autumn, wake up!" he shouted, his frustration turning to anger.

But still, Autumn did not respond. Her body was limp and unresponsive, her eyes staring vacantly into space.

James felt a sinking feeling in his gut as realization set in. There was nothing he could do to break her out of this state. Whatever force was driving her to draw was stronger than any earthly intervention.

His expression was solemn, James let go of her shoulders, his hands falling to his sides as he observed her relentless drawing. His jaw clenched tightly as he withdrew his wand, whispering an apology to Autumn before casting the spell. He watched with a pang of guilt as the drawings were devoured by flames.

The flames flared as they consumed the drawings, eating away at the parchment and leaving nothing behind. James watched as all the evidence of Autumn's trance melted into ashes, feeling a pang of guilt and sorrow.

But as the flames died down, he could see a change in her countenance. Her eyes flickered, losing their glazed look as she slowly came back to reality.

Autumn's eyes widened as she took in her surroundings, confusion etched on her face. She looked around the room, her gaze finally settling on James.

"What... what happened?" she asked, her voice faint and bewildered. "Where are all my drawings?"

James let out a shaky breath, relief flooding through him as she spoke. He approached her, his expression a mixture of concern and guilt.

"You lost control," he said softly. "You were drawing for hours, and nothing would stop you. I had to burn them."

There was a sinister voice echoing within Autumn's mind, filled with anger. She was unable to push it away, and her frown deepened as her lips twisted into an expression of irritation. "What in Merlin's name were you thinking?" her voice demanded, "Why did you burn them?"

James took a step back, visibly taken aback by the unexpected flare of anger in Autumn's tone.

"I had to," James replied, his voice firm but tinged with regret. "You were locked in a trance, and nothing I said or did seemed to break you out of it. Burning the drawings was the only way to bring you back to reality."

Autumn's irritation flared higher, her voice taking on a sharper edge. "And you thought destroying my work was the best solution?" she snapped. "You had no right to make that decision for me."

James's expression hardened, his frustration beginning to surface. "What choice did I have?!" he exclaimed. "You weren't responding to anything I said, and the longer you continued to draw, the deeper you fell into that state. I was worried about you, damn it!"

Autumn's anger boiled over, her voice rising to a shout. "So you decided to destroy my hard work, my creative output, without any regard for my feelings?"

James clenched his jaw, the guilt gnawing at him like a relentless beast, "Damn it, Autumn, I didn't do it to hurt you. I was trying to help you."

"Help me?" Autumn snapped, her voice laced with sarcasm. "Is that what you call it? Burning everything I poured my heart and soul into?"

James's frustration flared once more, his anger matching her own. "I care about you, damn it. I couldn't just sit there and watch you destroy yourself like that."

"Destroy myself?" Autumn repeated incredulously, her voice filled with disbelief. "Is that what you think I was doing? Destroying myself? No, James, I was creating, I was immersed in my art, and it felt amazing until you decided to come along and ruin everything."

James's expression turned stern, his voice firm but tinged with irritation. "Amazing? You call sitting there, sketching away for hours without acknowledging anything or anyone, amazing?"

He ran a hand through his hair, his frustration mounting with each word. "You were oblivious to everything, Autumn. You weren't just creating, you were shutting the whole world out."

Autumn's anger bubbled over, her eyes narrowing as she retorted, "Maybe I wanted to shut the world out! Maybe I wanted to lose myself in my art for a while instead of dealing with all the crap out there!"

James's jaw clenched tight, his anger rearing its ugly head. "And how is that fair to me, huh? I was worried sick about you! I didn't want you to lose yourself like that!"

Autumn recoiled, overcome by a flood of foreign anger that seemed to seize control. She grabbed her hair in frustration and let out a bewildered groan. "What just... happened?" she murmured to herself, her gaze slowly shifting towards James.

James furrowed his brows, clearly baffled by the sudden change in Autumn's demeanour. Concern etched across his face, he slowly began to realize that she was unaware of the anger she had just unleashed.

He took a tentative step closer to her, his voice softer now as he spoke. "Autumn, what was that?" he asked cautiously.

Autumn let out a shaky breath, her voice hoarse as she replied, "I... I don't know. It was like a wave of anger just overtook me. But it wasn't my anger. It didn't feel like mine."

James's frown deepened, a mixture of concern and confusion on his face. "That's not normal," he said quietly. "Anger doesn't just wash over you like that."

He watched as Autumn seemed to struggle with her emotions, her body language betraying her distress. He cautiously took another step forward, his voice gentle yet firm. "Autumn, talk to me. What's going on with you?"

Autumn's hand trembled as she clenched her fist tightly. Her voice, tinged with bewilderment, echoed softly. "I'm not sure, James," she began, her gaze distant. "There's something deep inside me, a voice telling me I must draw without fear. There's a war out there, and it's as if my mind is continually reminding me that my abilities are needed."

James's eyes widened at her words, his mind processing the implications of what she was saying. He took another step closer, his voice filled with curiosity and concern.

"A voice, you say?" he inquired, his brow furrowing in concentration. "And you can't ignore it, or block it out?"

Autumn shook her head, her voice still trembling. "It's like a constant whisper at the back of my mind," she explained, her hand subconsciously clenching and unclenching. "And whenever I try to resist, it becomes stronger, more insistent. It's as if it has a will of its own."

James sighed loudly, resigned to her words. He reached out and took her hand, holding it tenderly. "Alright," he conceded, "we need to train you to draw willingly. I know it sounds crazy." He paused, his expression sombre. "But you're right. There's a war out there, and I hate the thought of putting you in harm's way. However, having you in control is far better than what just happened earlier."

Autumn nodded slowly, her expression a mix of trepidation and determination. "I don't know if I can do this, James," she admitted, her voice shaking slightly.

James squeezed her hand reassuringly. "You're stronger than you think, Autumn. We'll work together to find a way to tame this voice and make sure you're the one in control."

They settled into a quiet agreement, their hands still clasped together. James could sense the turmoil within her, the tension in her grip betraying her anxiety. He spoke softly, offering reassurance.

"We'll take it slow," he reassured her. "We'll start with brief sketching sessions and gradually increase the duration. Every time you feel that voice trying to push you, you tell me, okay?"

Autumn nodded slowly, her eyes meeting his gaze. "Okay," she agreed, her voice still trembling.

He gave her hand another squeeze, a steadfast determination shining in his eyes. "And remember," he added firmly, "if it becomes too much, we stop. Your well-being comes first, no exceptions."

Autumn nodded again, a small smile of gratitude tugging at her lips. "Thank you, James," she whispered, the weight of her gratitude evident in her tone.

He smiled back at her, his determination unwavering. "We're in this together, Autumn," he assured her. "No matter what comes our way, we face it together."

They stood in silence for a moment, both lost in their thoughts. Autumn's mind was a maelstrom of emotions, fear and determination warring within her. She squeezed James's hand tighter, finding reassurance in his warm touch.

"Should we start now?" Autumn asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

James gently shook his head, his fingers brushing against her cheek in a comforting gesture. "Not today," he murmured, "you've drawn enough. Let's meet up with the others; they're probably going crazy searching for you."

Autumn chuckled softly as the two walked out of the common room to find their friends standing outside.

Remus tapped his robe, his gaze flicking between James and Autumn, and James facepalmed, realizing they had forgotten they had the Marauders' Map, which could have helped them locate her sooner.

Sirius and Peter exchanged knowing looks, and they all breathed a collective sigh of relief. Meanwhile, Lily and Raven rushed over to Autumn, their concern evident on their faces.

"Oh, thank Merlin," Lily blurted out, her eyes wide and worried. "We thought something had happened to you!"

Raven wrapped her arms around Autumn, holding her tight. "We were so worried!" she exclaimed.

Autumn smiled weakly, feeling guilty for the stress she must have caused her friends." I... I lost myself in my drawings," she confessed. "I got carried away and completely lost track of time."

Remus exchanged a concerned glance with the other Marauders, their expressions betraying their worry. "You were gone for hours, Autumn," he pointed out, his voice gentle but stern. "We couldn't find you anywhere."

Sirius nodded in agreement, his eyes studying Autumn with a mix of relief and concern. "We were about to send out a search party," he added, his voice laced with worry. "We thought something bad had happened to you."

Autumn cringed at the thought of her friends worrying so much. She apologized sincerely. "I'm sorry, guys," she said, her voice filled with remorse. "I didn't mean to cause such a panic. I just... got carried away with my drawings. It won't happen again, I promise."

Lily and Raven shared a glance, their worry slowly giving way to understanding. "We're just glad you're okay," Lily said softly, her voice filled with relief.

Raven nodded in agreement, her eyes filled with concern. "But you really scared us, you know," she added gently.

Autumn nodded, feeling a pang of guilt in her chest. "I know, and I'm truly sorry," she said, her voice sincere. "I wasn't thinking straight. I got so lost in my drawings that I lost track of time entirely."

James stepped forward, seizing the opportunity to brief their friends on his plan. "Everyone," he began, his voice steady, "I have an idea that I think everyone should hear." He paused, glancing at the group. "It's about Autumn."

The group fell silent as all eyes turned to James, their curiosity piqued. They waited for him to continue, their expressions a mixture of concern and curiosity.

"I understand we've been cautious about Autumn drawing," James began, his expression solemn. "But today, I struggled to bring her back to reality while drawing. Burning the drawings helped, but we can't continue limiting her as much as possible." He paused, his voice determined. "The more we restrict her, the more she might slip into a trance-like state."

The group exchanged knowing glances, their curiosity giving way to understanding. They knew James had a point.

James nodded, his expression resolute. He gestured towards Autumn, who stood quietly beside him and began outlining his idea.

"What I propose is that we supervise her while she sketches," he began, his gaze flickering between his friends. "We have to allow her to draw and be creative, but at the same time, keep an eye on her to prevent her from falling into that trance state again."

Lily furrowed her brow, mulling over Autumn's explanation. "So, it's essentially the same approach, but we're not restricting her as much?"

Autumn nodded in agreement. "Yes, but it's not just about drawing at will. I need to train myself to be aware and in control when I do."

Raven pondered, her expression contemplative. "It's not a bad idea," she agreed, "but how do we ensure Autumn stays conscious during her drawings?"

James rubbed his chin, deep in thought. "That's where you all come in," he replied. "You all need to monitor her closely. If you notice any signs of her slipping into a trance, gently engage with her or find a way to distract her."

Sirius chimed in, a determined glint in his eye. "It won't be easy," he noted. "We know how absorbed Autumn can get in her drawings."

"This will require a lot of patience and dedication," Remus added, his voice serious. "We all need to be on high alert and ready to intervene at any moment. But if we can manage it, it might be our best option to keep Autumn safe while still allowing her to engage in her art."

"So, are we all in agreement?" James asked. He looked around the group, waiting for their responses.

The others exchanged glances, considering the plan. After a moment of hesitation, they nodded one by one.

James smiled, feeling reassured. "Then it's settled," he declared. "We'll start supervised drawing sessions with Autumn, and we'll all keep a close eye on her."

Autumn took a deep breath, a mix of anxiety and determination evident in her expression. "Thank you, everyone," she said quietly. "I appreciate your support and willingness to help me through this."

The group bagan to walk together, making their way towards the Great Hall for dinner. Conversations buzzed among them, the tension from earlier having slightly lessened in the wake of their collective concern and planning.

Autumn felt a pang of hurt as she sensed they were treating her like a child, but she realized it was her own emotions getting the best of her. After all, she had witnessed her state earlier, consumed by anger, and she never wanted to experience that loss of control again.

If she was going to fight alongside her friends, she wanted it to be on her terms, with her own conscious decision, not under the influence of an external force.

James noticed the look of hurt on Autumn's face, silently cursing himself for not anticipating her feelings. He took a step closer to her, his voice gentle.

"I know this isn't easy for you," he said quietly. "Believe me, this isn't about treating you like a child. We're doing this to keep you safe and to ensure you stay in control."

Autumn sighed her expression a mix of frustration and resignation. "I know," she admitted, her voice laced with a hint of irritation. "I get it. But it still feels like you're all hovering over me, waiting for me to slip up."

James reached out and gently took her hand in his, his touch comforting. "I understand your frustration," he said softly, his voice filled with compassion. "But please understand that we're doing this because we care about you, and we want to protect you. I know it feels like we're babying you, but that's not our intention."

Autumn let out a sigh, her irritation dissipating slightly. She knew James meant well, but the feeling of being constantly monitored still gnawed at her.

"I know you mean well," she conceded, her voice quieter now. "I just... I don't want to feel like I'm being watched every second. It's suffocating."

James stroked her hand gently with his thumb, his touch meant to be reassuring. " I get it. I really do," he reassured her. " But we're not going to be watching you every second. We just need to keep an eye on you to ensure you stay in control. We'll give you space, but we'll be nearby if you ever feel lost in your art again."

Autumn nodded slowly, her frustration still lingering but somewhat diminished. "I suppose it's a necessary measure," she conceded. "But please, promise me you won't treat me like a ticking time bomb ready to explode at any moment."

James couldn't help but chuckle softly at her analogy. "I promise we won't treat you like a ticking time bomb," he assured her, his voice filled with warmth. "We just want to look out for you. You're one of us, and we take care of our own."

Autumn managed a small smile, her irritation giving way to a glimmer of gratitude. "I appreciate that," she said softly. "It's just hard, you know, feeling like I'm being controlled by something outside of myself. But I trust you all, and I know you're doing this to protect me."

James squeezed her hand gently, his gaze unwavering. "We'll make this work together," he assured her. "We'll find a balance where you can continue drawing without losing control. And remember, it's not about being babysat it's about support and guidance. We're here to help you stay grounded."

Autumn nodded slowly, her expression softening further. "I know," she admitted quietly. "I guess I just don't want to appear weak in front of you all. It's tough, feeling like I need supervision like a child."

Remus chimed in, his voice filled with understanding. "You're not weak, Autumn," he assured her. "This situation is out of your control. We're just trying to provide support to keep you safe and grounded. We don't think you're weak or child-like because of this."

Sirius chimed in next, his voice firm but gentle. "If anything, it shows how strong you are," he pointed out. "It takes a lot of courage to acknowledge your limitations and ask for help when you need it."

Lily, still processing the situation, nodded in agreement. "We're a team," she reminded Autumn. "We look out for each other, and that means supporting and protecting each other when the situation calls for it."

Raven nodded," We're here to help you get through this, and it doesn't make you weak."

Peter, the quietest among the group, spoke up finally. "We're not trying to control you or make you feel like a child," he said softly. "We just want to make sure you stay safe and in control. We trust you, Autumn."

Autumn looked around the group, their words sinking in and soothing her frustrations. She knew they meant well, and their reassurance helped ease her anxiety.

"I know you guys have my best interest at heart," she said quietly. "I just hope I can get through this without being a burden to you all."

James squeezed her hand again, his voice warm and compassionate. "You're not a burden, Autumn," he assured her. "We're here for you because we care and because it's what friends do, remember?"

Autumn smiled faintly, feeling a glimmer of hope and gratitude. "Yeah, you're right," she agreed. "I guess I just need to let go of my pride a bit and accept the help you're offering."

Lily smiled warmly at Autumn. "That's the spirit," she encouraged. "We're all in this together, and we'll figure it out as a team. We've faced crazy situations before and always come out victorious. This won't be any different."

Remus nodded in agreement, a hint of determination in his eyes. "We have each other's backs. We'll get through this together, whatever it takes."