"Do you want me to go with you?" he asked, his face written with what Garnet now recognized as concern. She knew he wanted to come with her, but that was one matter on which they wouldn't agree.

Garnet shook her head. "No." She needed to do this herself.

His gaze dropped down to her waist. She put a hand over her abdomen where a bandage was hidden beneath her dress. The doctors had wanted to bring in a magician to speed up her recovery and prevent scarring, but she'd refused. She'd rather wear this bandage for her entire life if she had to than for this wound to heal without a scar.

Her father hadn't met her gaze when she'd told him she wanted it to scar. She'd felt bad for that, as he had no doubt thought she wanted to make him feel guilty for causing the wound in the first place.

That wasn't her intention. The scar was her mark of shame to bear, a disfigurement outside to match the one inside. It hadn't been the first thing she had wanted to explain to her father, but been unable to.

"If you think you can handle the walk..." he trailed off, his features tightening into a grimace.

Garnet lifted her chin. "I'll be fine, Father. It's a short walk. Besides, if I need you, I can call out. I'll be fine."

"All right then." He reluctantly settled into the seat of their rented automobile.

The automobile was run solely on a combination of electric and earth magic. It would normally cost more than her father made in a year just to rent it, but the owner had been willing to let a savior of Halyin use it for free. Garnet had protested the use of it fiercely, until her father had explained exactly how long it would take them to reach the memorial without it.

She turned away. Ahead of her loomed the path up the hill to the memorial, littered with a scattering of bushes and trees. Just looking at it made her want to wince, but if she flinched her father would surely insist on coming with her up the hill.

She gritted her teeth and started the trek. Her wound pulsated beneath her bandage. She might rip open the stitches if she weren't careful, but it would be worth it. Perhaps if she were in recovery, Diamond would have time to calm down and visit Garnet again.

Then again, her sister had seemed pretty enraged the last time they had met. When she had been in the hospital, conscious enough to notice she had visited, but not yet aware enough to ask for the doctors to stop using their magic on her, she had overheard her father and Diamond talking just behind the pale curtain that gave her bed a semblance of privacy.

"When she wakes up, say your goodbyes. We'll be leaving in the morning to return to our home." Diamond's smug tones were clearly recognizable, even to Garnet's fuzzy mind.

"What gives you the right to move her?" It took her a moment longer to place this voice as her father's.

"I am her guardian!"

"Guardian," her father retorted, "like the Guardians you gave her to so she could be ritually slaughtered?"

"Garnet chose that."

"Did she choose to risk her health to travel halfway across the country?"

"Did she choose to get stabbed? Oh wait, you're the one that chose that."

Garnet sat straight up in her bed. Her cut ached, but she clamped her lips together before a moan could escape.

"That-that's not fair." His voice quavered. "You- you know I didn't have control over my actions and- and I didn't know it was her in front of me, I never would have tried to hurt her..."

"Actions speak louder than words, old man. In the morning, Garnet and I will be leaving, and that is final."

"No," Garnet said, her voice barely a rasp.

"Did she say something?" Diamond's voice asked.

Garnet's father walked around the curtain. He looked at her, and she could see his expression change as he forced himself to smile. He crossed the room and carefully sat down at the edge of her bed.

"Hey Princess," he said. "How are you feeling?"

"I don't want to leave." Garnet tried to cross her arms, but the motion was too uncomfortable. Her father and sister exchanged a look. She added, "I heard what you said. Both of you. I want to stay with my father."

Diamond's lips curled up. "What do you mean?"

Garnet spoke deliberately. "I- I'm sorry Diamond, but I'm done being perfect. I want to stay here until I'm better. And when I am better, I want to take my father up on the offer to live with him." She looked at her father. "That is, if it still applies..."

"Of course it is," he assured her.

She sank back onto her pillow and he stroked her hair. She closed her eyes, but she could hear Diamond stomping out of the room.

Garnet came back to attention at the top of the hill. The stone memorial was only a few feet away. Her heart began to pound even though she'd already overcome the worst of the hike.

She could do this. She told the words to herself again and again with each step closer to the stone pillar. She could do this.

Garnet knelt to the ground in the shadow of the commemorative pillar. She could see all the names engraved on the stone. The fallen al Theas were all listed back to back. If things had gone a bit differently, Garnet would have been among them.

"This is for all of you," she whispered. The wind carried her words around the pillar.

She placed her flowers first. That was the easy part. The blue petals looked peaceful amongst the grass and stone, almost as if she had brought the sky itself for the dead to enjoy in the darkness of their graves.

She took a deep breath. "I can't be a magician anymore." The words were for herself instead of any imagined audience of the dead. "If I don't do this, I might be tempted to become one again."

Her fingers tugged the bone crown out of her hair. Even now, after months of no use, its touch sent a rush of power through her skin.

Visions of magic danced behind her eyelids. Everything she'd ever seen anyone ever do with magic flashed by. The crown of bone in her hand could never make her a princess, but it could give her power greater than one.

She'd seen people use magic for good. The creators of the automobile that had brought her here, the doctors that had saved her life, the Magis that had saved Halyin, her father. Perhaps no magic wasn't the way to go. She could be a good magician, like them-

No. Garnet's free hand pinched the inside of her wrist. She may be a lot of things, but she wasn't perfect. If she kept the bone crown, she'd succumb to temptation.

She cupped out a tiny hole in the ground. Her hand tightened into a fist with the bone crown inside and hovered over the hole.

If there ever was a time when she felt certain of her own goodness, she could come back here and dig it up. If that day ever came, she could always come back.

Garnet opened her fist. The bone crown hit the ground with a soft thump. She swept dirt into the hole, a protective blanket over her buried curse.

She closed her eyes. That was it. She wasn't a magician anymore. Mixed emotions budded in her chest, like anxiety and regret...and relief.

She didn't know if one day her feelings would change. She didn't know if she'd ever feel good enough to do magic once more. But that was okay.

After all, nobody was perfect.