Our apologies for the delay! Both the hosts have been busy as of late, and we hope to be quicker with scores in the future. This task, we received a grand total of seven entries. We're disappointed at the number, but are thoroughly impressed by each of you who did provide an entry! Hopefully the turnout next task will improve... That being said, let's get to the scores.

⟁⟁⟁

First Entry Bonus (+0.5): It's Bella Fiore who snags this extra half point this time around... will it be you next time?

⟁⟁⟁

500 BCE - Alba Minor

Score: 0

Two strikes; eliminated.

⟁⟁⟁

250 BCE - Ishani Pemmaraju

Paella's Score: 10

Moon's Score: 10.5

10.25 (-0.5) = 9.75

Feedback: The dream you crafted for Ishani was extremely intriguing, and your beginning hooked us immediately; your description of Ishani's pain was also commendable. However, the two entries you've provided so far didn't strike us as incredibly related- we were looking for more development of not just Ishani, but her family as well.

We were disappointed that you chose not to integrate the ballot challenge you were assigned this task, and have thus subtracted a penalty from your score.

⟁⟁⟁

80s - Bella Fiore

Paella's Score: 8

Moon's Score: 8.5

8.25 [+0.5] = 8.75

Feedback: You displayed a considerable amount of creativity this task and we enjoyed your dialogue, but something you need to work on is having a balanced entry. Your entry was very concentrated on the interactions between characters, and we needed more of the other components like description, action, and emotion. Try to notice when you've got a significant number of one or two-line paragraphs at the same time. This will show you where you need to elaborate more.

⟁⟁⟁

1060s - Jorrvaskr

Paella's Score: 8.5

Moon's Score: 8.5

8.5 = 8.5

Feedback: You paint a great visual picture with your words, but something we think you could strive to include is details that aren't just through sight, but have to do with the other senses (you got this later in your piece, but we're looking for it all around). Additionally, your dialogue is strong, but consider incorporating more actions in with the words. What is each person doing as they speak? How do they say their words? What facial expressions and emotions can be inferred? How do the people around react to what the person is saying? Attempting to answer these questions will help you elaborate more in your writing. Another thing we enjoyed was the creative way you addressed the device and how Jorrvaskr discovered it. We can't wait for more entries from you!

⟁⟁⟁

1700s - Erelyn Laverna

Paella's Score: 10.5

Moon's Score: 10

10.25 = 10.25

Feedback: Used extension.

⟁⟁⟁

1770s - Paige Leroy

Score: 0

No entry received.

⟁⟁⟁

1770s - William Young

Score: 0

Two strikes; eliminated.

⟁⟁⟁

1780s - Martha Harrison

Score: 0

Two strikes; eliminated.

⟁⟁⟁

1800s - Nerezza Diana Archeli

Score: 0

Dropped out.

⟁⟁⟁

1890s - Kaden Larke

Score: 0

No entry received.

⟁⟁⟁

1910s - Cecil Stephens

Paella's Score: 10

Moon's Score: 10

10 = 10

Feedback: One of the strongest points of your entry is your characterization, but for a considerable portion of your entry, that characterization isn't of Cecil. You've got the subplot of Master Henry's disappearance and all the supporting servants going very nicely, but your protagonist is a little drowned out with all the other activity. In the future, try to focus the entry more around Cecil and really delve into his thoughts and emotions. Though you did tie your entry full circle with Cecil's thoughts on Henry near the end, we were looking for that sooner rather than later. That being said, overall this was a strong entry that may have just needed to be drawn out a little more. We liked your incorporation of the cat, and can't wait to see where you take Cecil next!

⟁⟁⟁

1920s - Alex Moretti

Score: 0

Two strikes; eliminated.

⟁⟁⟁

1930s - Edith Burke

Paella's Score: 8

Moon's Score: 7

7.5 = 7.5

Feedback: Your characterization of Edith was humorous this task and her stepmother and sister consistent, but something we think you could work on is Edith's emotions. In your previous entry, she seemed unenthusiastic to be leaving for this private house, but seems quite welcome to the idea this time around. We also feel that you could have stretched out the scene where Edith was injured. This part felt a little imbalanced and had little elaboration; it also struck us as a little out of the blue for there to suddenly be trees when we'd been so focused on the house. In the future, perhaps you could try to tie your entries full circle a little more? Maybe Edith had noticed the trees when she'd originally pulled into the house.

⟁⟁⟁

1940s - Asa Swan

Paella's Score: 12

Moon's Score: 11

11.5 = 11.5

Feedback: Used extension.

⟁⟁⟁

1980s - Aurora Fernandez

Score: 0

Two strikes; eliminated.

⟁⟁⟁