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CHAPTER 45: SOMETHING AKIN TO GRIEF

❝ it is weird how you can go from being everything to nothing in the blink of an eye. ❞

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HOPE HAS THIS RECURRING DREAM IN WHICH KLAUS BREAKS THE NECK OF EVERY PIGEON IN THE PARK. She helped; a good daughter. She snatched them from the air and tore out the feathers. Bloody and brittle. There was once a king named Ibrahim who worshiped a god. There was once a girl like her who ripped the heart out of the chest. All that red soaked skin under her fingernails. All she did was think of stories. About history. About his story. About her story. About how they are all the same story. Someone always ends up holding something mangled and dead.

Henry just wanted to be strong. Hayley just wanted to protect people. Lisina just wanted peace. Ivy just wanted happiness without destruction. Josh just wanted somewhere to call home. But Hope was not walking through Lafayette Cemetery for any of those people. She was here to pay her respects to her little sister whom she had killed in the crossfire of her rage. Her little sister whom she was currently avoiding like the plague. Guilt was something she was no stranger to. Though this was something else entirely. Something akin to grief. She could not escape it. Not that she deserved to.

"You didn't have to come," Hope muttered.

"I needed to know you were going to be okay," Enola said.

"I don't know why we leave flowers. Doesn't do them any good." Hope mumbled. Though she stood in front of the grave of Josh, it was clear that she was referring to Finn. "It is not much of an apology for killing someone."

"It was an accident. Finn understands that." Enola tried. "You rid the city of those vermin."

"Don't make it sound so noble." Hope scoffed, turning to face Enola. "Yeah. I killed a few bag guys. But it was as much to get the magic out of me as anything else. Besides, it is not like it lasted more than a few hours." She showed her mother the black veins that had reappeared on her forearms. "At least Finn will get revenge next week when the full moon comes."

"Hope, however much you dread your first transformation, once you go through it, you are going to feel much better." Enola reassured.

"I don't know if I dread it or if I wish I could just turn and never turn back," Hope confessed. "I just—I don't think I can face her after what I did."

"I know," Enola sighed. "But you need to. There is no telling how much longer we have with her."

"What do you mean?" Hope frowned.

"She is refusing to feed," Enola confessed.

"But if she doesn't feed, she will die." Hope realized.

"Your father is with her now," Enola continued. "But she is resilient and stubborn and—"

"This is all my fault," Hope whispered. "She would not be in this predicament if I had not—"

"How were you supposed to know she would be there?." Enola interrupted. "It is not your fault."

"I killed her," Hope reminded. "If she resented me before, she is going to hate me now."

"That is not true," Enola tried. "Finn adores you—"

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Finn despises Hope. She had until midnight to complete her transition. Her mother told her it was her choice. But her father was adamant that it was not. Though her sister didn't even bother to check on her. She was feeling rather spiteful about this whole ordeal. Which was why she had yet to complete the transition. Out of spite. Her sister killed her and hadn't so much apologized for it. She was angry and scared and so very lonely.

Finn half expected Klaus to reappear when the bedroom door was suddenly pushed open. Though the head that poked into the room made her shoulders cave with relief. She immediately stood to her feet and rushed over to capture her favorite aunt into a bone crushing hug. Her tears were flowing down her rosy cheeks in an instant and sniffles filled the otherwise silent room. This was the one person she felt she could talk to about anything without the fear of being judged. It made her wonder. She pulled back through teary eyes full of confusion.

"What are you doing here?" Finn inquired.

"Your mom called," Bonnie answered. "Asked me to talk to you."

"Shouldn't you be planning your wedding?" Finn sniffled.

"You are more important," Bonnie said. "Your mom wanted to be here."

"But she is busy with Hope," Finn nodded in understanding.

"But she is busy trying to convince Hope to talk to you," Bonnie corrected.

"I don't want to talk to her," Finn scowled. "Ever again."

"You don't mean that," Bonnie denied. "She is your sister."

"She is my murderer," Finn scoffed. "She killed me, Aunt Bonnie."

"I know," Bonnie sighed. "I am not here to convince you to forgive her."

"Then why are you here?" Finn questioned sternly.

"Your Aunt Freya and I are getting married," Bonnie informed. "Tomorrow."

"Congratulations," Finn smiled softly. "You guys deserve to be happy."

"And we would be," Bonnie agreed. "If you were alive to attend the ceremony."

"Please don't do this to me," Finn pleaded, taking a seat on the bed.

"This is not about Hope," Bonnie clarified. "This is about your mom. She has lost so many people. Friends and family. But she will not survive losing you. Losing her child has always been her biggest fear." She took a seat on the bed. "Please don't do this to her."

"What do you suggest I do?" Finn wondered.

"That is entirely up to you," Bonnie concluded. "I am just saying that your mom would not recover from losing you."

"She already lost me," Finn reminded. "I died."

"Then you came back to life," Bonnie said. "You are looking at this like it is some sort of punishment."

"Maybe it is," Finn huffed. "Maybe this is my punishment for doing nothing."

"Maybe this is your chance to do something," Bonnie shrugged. "Think about it. You have an entire future ahead of you."

"I don't even know where I would start," Finn huffed.

"That is one answer I do not have," Bonnie confessed. "But the only way for you to find that answer is for you to live. I was sort of hoping you would be my Maid Of Honor."

"Seriously?" Finn gasped.

"Seriously," Bonnie smiled. "Say yes."

"Yes!" Finn nodded. "Yes. I would be honored to be your Maid Of Honor."

"You know," Bonnie began teasingly. "That would require you to be alive by tomorrow."

Bonnie grabbed the letter opener off the bedside table. She wore a soft smile as she cut into her wrist. It was not deep enough to actually injure her. But it was deep enough to draw blood. There was a time when she viewed vampirism as some sort of disease. Her opinion had long since changed.

All Finn could see was red. She had promised herself that she would not let other people make this choice for her. But she was beginning to realize that this was not a choice. Her eyes seemed to dilate as the blood had successfully reeled her in. She slowly leaned forward and took a small sip on the blood before quickly pulling back. She had heard ghost stories of people in transition who could not stop the hunger. She seemed to do a good enough job. Because that small sip was all she needed to become a full fledged vampire.

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Hope found Finn in the study. She had avoided the compound in favor of the cemetery. It really put things into perspective for her. There was no telling how long she had with her loved ones. Which is why she had to have this conversation. Even though she already knew the play by play. She would get completely reamed out. And she deserved every moment of it. So she entered the study to find her sister seated on the armchair with a boatload of homework.

"I heard you have decided to complete the transition," Hope began. "I am glad."

"Because you wanted the opportunity to stake me in the heart next?" Finn wondered.

Finn did not look at Hope. Her gaze was focused on the worksheet in her lap. She had missed weeks of school and was drowning in missing assignments. She was lucky that the headmaster was her uncle. Otherwise she would probably be expelled by now. Though her situation was a unique one. She was currently on temporary leave due to her less than pleasing circumstances.

"I get it. You hate me. That is okay. I am not here to convince you otherwise." Hope reassured.

"Then why are you here?" Finn hummed. "Other than to disrupt the peace I have oh so carefully crafted in your absence."

"I was hoping to call a temporary cease fire until after the wedding," Hope blurted.

"Cease fire?" Finn repeated, finally looking up from the mountain of homework. "I didn't realize that we were at war."

"Remember when I borrowed and lost your favorite doll in third grade?" Hope inquired. "You left the head of my favorite teddy bear on my desk. I still have no idea what you did with the body."

"Are you worried you are going to end up like that teddy bear?" Finn teased.

"Yes, actually." Hope nodded frantically. "I am terrified because I know you."

"Then you should know that there is not going to be a cease fire," Finn decided.

"I thought there was no war," Hope countered.

Finn simply smiled at Hope. Revenge was a plate best served cold in the form of the Hollow. All she had to do was sit back and watch the darkness consume her sister. It sounded kind of messed up the longer she thought about it. But it was revenge. And it was liberating. Until her parents walked through that door with those furrowed brows and worried glances.

"Girls," Klaus began. "I am afraid we have some bad news."

"I spoke to your Aunt Freya," Enola began, eyes trained on Hope. "She said that the dark magic is destroying you from the inside out. It is only a matter of time before it kills you."

"How do we stop it?" Finn questioned. Worry marred her once peaceful face. She had been looking forward to watching her sister struggle. But she did not want to watch her sister die.

"We can't," Klaus confessed.

"How long?" Hope questioned. She looked at peace with this horrible information.

"Weeks. Days. Maybe hours." Enola answered. "There is no way to know for sure."

"We will fix this," Klaus claimed.

"And if you don't?" Hope wondered.

"We will," Klaus said. "This is not the end for you, my love."

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Freya and Bonnie were getting married today. Hope and Finn were the Maid Of Honors. Josie was the flower girl. Lizzie was the ring bearer. There were only a few things left to accomplish.

Freya still needed to find the perfect dress for the occasion. Which is how she found herself standing in front of a body length mirror. Her eyes were narrowed on her unrecognizable reflection. She must have gone through hundreds of dresses by now. She was running out of time. She still had to find someone to walk her down the aisle. Though she would need a dress for that and she was struggling to find the perfect one.

"I look like a disco ball," Freya deadpanned.

"A gorgeous disco ball," Enola countered. "But there are plenty more to choose from."

"Never thought I would be walking myself down the aisle," Freya muttered.

"Did Bonnie say who was walking her down the aisle?" Enola wondered.

"Alaric will be walking Bonnie down the aisle," Freya informed. "I swear he fathers everyone except his own kids."

"Look—if you are dead set on having Elijah walk you down the aisle, I am sure he will come around eventually." Enola tried.

"I don't know. The Elijah I know would put anything aside for family. But he is different now. He is carrying around all this guilt. Like he should be punished for the rest of eternity for the part he played in what happened to Hayley." Freya ranted. "But he didn't even know who she was when he did it. It kind of pisses me off."

"Yeah, well, it wouldn't be a Mikaelson family gathering without drama." Enola hummed. "Just wait until you have kids."

"If we have kids," Freya corrected.

"If?" Enola repeated. "Bonnie does not talk about it like it is an if."

"We haven't exactly had the conversation quite yet," Freya confessed.

"Well, don't you think you should do that before you walk down the aisle?" Enola said.

"I just—I lost a son before he was born and barely got over it." Freya sighed, collapsing on the couch beside Enola. "Look at our family. How do you tell someone you can't have a child because you are afraid you are going to hurt it?" Tears began to fall from her eyes before she could even think to stop it. "That you will find some way to put your needs before theirs because that is what your parents did to you. That you are toxic and broken and a Mikaelson and that is just what we do."

"Listen to me," Enola learned forward, grabbing Freya by the hand. "We may be damaged. But we are not doomed to repeat the same mistakes our parents made. After everything that we have been through, none of us would see a child of our own suffer just to ease our own pain." She wiped the tears away with a soft smile. "You always put our family in front of yourself. You can break the cycle."

"Do you really believe that?" Freya sniffled.

"Yeah, I do." Enola nodded.

"Thank you," Freya whispered, pulling Enola in for a much needed hug. "Will you walk me down the aisle?"

"What?" Enola blinked, pulling back to look Freya in the eye.

"You are the one person who has always been by my side. My chosen sister. My closest confidant." Freya said. "I want you to walk me down the aisle."

"Then that is exactly what I am going to do," Enola smiled, pulling Freya in for another hug. "I love you so much."

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Securing a wedding venue on such short notice would have been next to impossible if it wasn't for Klaus. He personally set everything up himself because he loved his dear sister. Though he welcomed the distraction that it was. But he stopped thinking about it for a brief moment when the music began to play.

Bonnie exited one of the two tents arm in arm with Alaric. She wore a gorgeous white pantsuit with a lace corset and a blazer. Her strappy silver heels matched the rest of her subtle jewelry that pinned her hair in an intricate bun. The amount of people in attendance was enough to bring tears to her eyes. It had been years since everyone was able to be in the same place at the same time. Especially on such short notice.

Finn. Hope. Klaus. Elijah. Rebekah. Kol. Davina. Marcel. Vincent. Caroline. Alaric. Lizzie. Josie. Elena. Even Jeremy was here for this special moment. Bonnie reached the end of the aisle. This was where she belonged. With her family. She suddenly felt a tidal wave of emotion nearly drown her. There was a time in her life when she thought that this would never be possible.

"You ready?" Enola hummed.

"I have been ready for ten years," Freya confessed.

"It only took you a century to admit it," Enola teased.

Freya emerged from the second tent alongside Enola. She wore a lace off the shoulder dress with a short train. Her hair was worn in a half up half down style that she had lots of help with. But none of that mattered when she laid eyes on the love of her life who stood at the other end of the aisle with teary eyes. A wobbly smile spread across her lips as she finally reached her destination.

"What happened to your dress?" Freya wondered.

"Are you kidding, girl?" Bonnie teased. "I am not taking any chances."

"Dearly beloved. Not to make this all about me. But we know how families work. Sometimes it is dinner and sometimes it is daggers." Kol joked, sending a pointed glance to Klaus who only scowled in return. "I do not know why it takes something as special as this to wake us up, to make us aware of the beauty in the moment, during the moment, or to be grateful for what we have, while we have it. Now, I, for one, am grateful for today, and I am grateful for all of you. Bonnie, when I first met you, I would have never predicted that you would become my sister. Now you are strong and beautiful and deserve nothing but the best in life." He looked like he was about to break down in tears as he turned to the ring bearer. "Lizzie, would you please?"

"It would be my pleasure," Lizzie smiled softly.

Bonnie nervously took the wedding ring off the pillow and spoke. Sweet nothings left her mouth as she swore she would respect and love and cherish her lover until the end of time. Her eyes were glossed over with unshed tears as she reminded herself that love still existed even after all she had lost.

Freya had learned that real love was rare. She was one of the lucky few who had the opportunity to find her soulmate. It felt as if her life meant absolutely nothing until this very moment. Like she was crafted for this and all she could do was smile because she would not have it any other way.

"Now, by the power vested in me by a Franciscan monk in the thirteenth century, and by the internet a few hours ago just to be on the safe side, I now pronounce you married." Kol finished. "You may both kiss the bride."

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Enola stood off to the side with Caroline and Elena. The sun had long since disappeared as they watched the happy couples take to the dance floor. People watching was a skill they had all acquired over the years of standing on the sidelines. All for their own reasons. Mostly because it was where they all felt most comfortable. One of them was separated, another was widowed, and the other lived a double life.

"Where is Ravi tonight?" Caroline inquired.

"My husband is at home with the kids," Elena informed.

"You are gonna have to tell him about us sooner or later," Enola said.

"Preferably before he notices that none of us age," Caroline joked.

"I know," Elena sighed. "I just do not want to scare him away."

"Too late. He already made the mistake of marrying you." Enola laughed.

"Speaking of marriage," Caroline began. "You and Klaus resolve your issues?"

"We have yet to discuss the future," Enola vaguely explained.

"Why the hell not?" Elena inquired. "You two have had more than enough time."

"That was before we found out that my daughter was dying," Enola blurted.

"What?" Caroline gasped. "I assume we are talking about Hope considering Finn is already dead."

"Does she know?" Elena inquired softly.

"Yeah," Enola sighed. "We sat them down last night."

"We?" Caroline quirked a brow.

"Klaus and I," Enola explained. "He has moved back into the compound for the time being. But it is just temporary."

"Does he know that?" Elena questioned.

Enola felt an overbearing presence nearby and that is when Klaus comes into view. He gave her a soft smile before beginning his approach. She was vaguely aware of her companions making a quick escape before he stopped in front of her. Though he did not speak immediately. He needed a moment to take her in.

"May I have this dance?" Klaus nearly begged.

"You want to dance to this?" Enola quirked a brow at the pop song that was currently playing. As if on cue, the song choice changed to the familiar instrumental of Give Me Love.

Klaus held a silent hand out and Enola hesitantly accepted. Her eyes flickered to her previous companions who were giving her nods of encouragement. He led her to the middle of the dance floor before his hands found a home upon her waist. There was a respectable distance that she kept between them. He respected it even if all he wanted to do was pull her in close and never let her go.

"I made a mistake," Klaus began.

"It is weird how you can go from being everything to nothing in the blink of an eye. You can talk to someone for years about everything and nothing all at once. You can know more about each other than anyone has ever known before." Enola hummed. "Then there comes a day when one of you decides that it is enough. You stop calling. You stop replying. You stop trying. It is just over. No words to break it off. No heartfelt goodbyes. Just a bunch of broken promises and stories that will never find a happy ending. You just go on with your lives and never look back."

"That is the problem. I am always looking back." Klaus explained. "For me. For you. For us."

"You do not need me anymore, Nik." Enola sighed.

"I will always need you, little monster." Klaus breathed. "I promise that is never going to change."

"Your promises mean nothing to me," Enola countered.

"I know," Klaus nodded. "I thought I was protecting you. That you were better off without me."

"I have stood by you through it all," Enola reminded. "When have I ever given you the impression that I would be better off without you?"

"When I realized that you deserved someone who could physically be there with you," Klaus claimed. "Someone like Declan. Someone kind. Someone soft. Someone calm."

"Declan was all of those things," Enola agreed. "But he was never you."

"You deserved better than me," Klaus reasoned.

"Deserved?" Enola frowned. "What changed?"

"You are it for me," Klaus smiled softly.

"Nik—"

"I will wait," Klaus claimed. "No matter how long it takes."

"Then you will be waiting for eternity," Enola claimed.

"If that is how long it takes, then gladly." Klaus nodded. "I would decay of age for you."

Enola wanted to say something but was startled by a sudden commotion a few feet away. Hope had almost fallen over but was caught by Finn who had rushed over with newly acquired enhanced speed. Looks of concern painted the venue. Especially from those who knew of the circumstances.

"Are you alright?" Enola questioned.

"I am fine," Hope reassured.

"Probably just too much champagne," Bonnie chuckled.

"Speaking of which—I would like to make a toast." Hope announced. She snatched the nearest flute of champagne and faced her family with a bright grim despite her circumstances. "This has been the best day ever. And you know what? You guys got a thousand years of moments like this one. I am glad I got to be around for this one before I die when the darkness takes over." Horrified looks filled the room as she raised the glass. "So . . . cheers!"

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AUTHORS NOTE.
i thought it would be more symbolic for enola to walk freya down the aisle. they are definitely the closest out of everyone else in the family. i just feel like it makes sense. until next time, my loves!!!