CHAPTER TWENTY

"You don't plan on asking Matt, right?" Leslie asked. "I don't think that would end well."

Aurelio shook his head. "Of course not. I'm not crazy. The only reason he's chill around me is because I never talk to him about personal stuff." He tapped the underside of the table as he thought. "Maybe I'll ask his mom."

"But that's a sensitive subject for her too. I don't think she'd appreciate you just randomly asking her about it."

"Well, true. But we'll cross that bridge when we come to it. Let me figure out how I'll reach her first. Matt said he hasn't seen her in three days."

Leslie froze for a moment, most likely contemplating the chance that Matt's mom left too. Then she shook her head. "I think she just comes home late and leaves early for work," she said. "And Matt probably didn't notice 'cause he was out or asleep." Aurelio nodded. He'd thought that too. "Anyway, so you can catch her if you wake up early enough and wait for her go out."

"I'll try that," Aurelio said, checking his phone. He yawned and quickly covered his mouth. "But it's too late now. She must've left already. I could still wait for her to come back later today, though. I would've tried to meet her wherever she works but even my parents know nothing about her."

"Yeah. Same here." Leslie touched the blank paper on the table and pursed her lips. "We didn't end up writing anything. We didn't come to a logical conclusion about this entire thing. We couldn't even 'work our way' back to the card. It kept getting more and more confusing." She sighed. "I have no idea how you kept all that in. I'm just...I'm sorry I couldn't really help."

Aurelio hummed. "So that's what 'sorry' coming out of your mouth sounds like."

"Hey! I have nothing against apologizing if it's actually warranted."

"It's not warranted here," Aurelio said, and he gave her a little smile. "Thanks for listening to me. I feel a little better now that I told someone."

"I'm glad, but you look even more exhausted than when you came. If you want..." She pointed at her bed over his shoulder. Aurelio subconsciously glanced back. "You can take a nap here and I'll make breakfast in the meantime. We'll continue discussing the situation after we eat. We still have time; my mom won't be here until evening."

"Nah. I'll help you make breakfast."

"Elio, come on. I feel like you might collapse. Just a little nap? I'll wake you up."

Aurelio snorted. "You wouldn't need to, trust me."

Leslie frowned. She mumbled, "Huh?" then, "Oh," a second later. Her confused frown turned pitiful. "I hope you know that there's nothing embarrassing about having nightmares."

Well. Maybe there wasn't. The bigger embarrassment was having someone actually watch him sob and scream his lungs out. Like hell he'd put himself in a situation like that, especially in front of Leslie. She'd seen enough of him freaking out like an idiot and freezing in the middle of the street. He couldn't jeopardize her perception of him any more.

"Yeah," Aurelio mumbled. "I'm hungry. Can we eat first?"

"Yeah. Come."

Aurelio followed her to the kitchen. After grabbing everything they needed, they sat next to each other at the corner of the table. Leslie started making toast with peanut butter and sliced straweberries, and when Aurelio reached to make his own, she smacked his hand away. "I'll make them," she said, then handed him his sandwich and pushed a glass of orange juice his way. "Vitamin C...good for your health, if you happen to give a shit about it." She gave him a sidelong glance and a playful smile as she prepared another toast.

"I happen to give a shit about it," Aurelio said as he took the glass. "Thanks but, um, I can't eat more, so..." He pointed at the extra sandwiches she was making. "No need."

"That's for Matt."

"Oh."

"I pack him food whenever there's leftovers or something." Leslie pointed at a small plastic lunchbox across the table. "How cute is this lunchbox, by the way? Thanks to Matt I'm making good use of it." Reaching over, she slid it nearer and placed the sandwich neatly inside. She'd cut it just right; it fit perfectly inside the plastic. "No idea why but I love packing food for him. It's strangely fun."

"He tried frying an egg last night. He burnt it, though. We ended up making pancakes."

"Of course he burnt it," Leslie said, laughing lightly. "At least he's trying. Did you use the recipe I gave you for the pancakes?"

"Yeah."

"So? How'd it taste?"

"Meh."

Leslie narrowed her eyes. "Meh?" Then she shook her head, catching on again. "I know you're just messing with me. You liked it."

"I did. Matt liked it too." Aurelio tried putting his half-eaten toast down, but Leslie shot him a glare, and he ended up finishing it. "So how was your family reunion?"

"Awkward as usual. My little cousins made sure to remind me that they don't like my name. My aunts and uncles kept bugging me about my dating life and I had to dodge their questions very carefully because my mom was glaring daggers at me, dude. If she figures out I have a boyfriend, I'm done for."

Oh, right. Her mom didn't know she had a boyfriend. She didn't know about half the things Leslie did, really--most of the time Leslie had to sneak out and come up with elaborate lies to cover up. Aurelio didn't know how Leslie could tolerate her mother's psycho control tendencies. It made him appreciate his parents even more than he already did.

"Anyway," Leslie sighed. "Back to your situation--"

"Are you happy with your boyfriend?" Aurelio asked. "Last time, when Matt asked you if you knew him, you looked...I don't know. Sad."

Leslie froze mid-word, and her mouth hung open for a moment. She slouched. "I should be happy."

"Should be?"

"I've had a crush on him for the longest time," she said. "I've always wanted to be with him. I've always liked every single thing about him. And I thought the way he used to tease me meant that he liked me too. And we're dating now. I...I should be happier."

"What's the problem then?"

"You know when you spend a lot of time with someone, you start discovering them, and you learn new things about them, like little details in their behavior or the way they think or something like that, and you end up falling in love with them even more?" Leslie asked. Aurelio nodded, although his heart was aflame right now. He found it hard to look her straight in the eyes, afraid she could see the jealousy in his. "It's the opposite with my boyfriend. The more I spend time with him, the more I un-discover him. All the things I liked about him...I don't know. They're just not there anymore."

"Oh." Aurelio had no idea what else to say. He was jealous of her boyfriend, but he wasn't happy about Leslie's unhappiness.

"Don't tell Matt," Leslie said, lowering her voice, as if Matt might somehow hear her, "but I think he's right. A piece of cardboard's more interesting than my own boyfriend."

"The first thing I'm gonna tell Matt when I see him is that you think he's right."

Leslie gasped. "Elio! You're the worst, you know that?"

"Hush," Aurelio said. "I know I'm your favorite."

Leslie raised a brow. "Sleep-deprivation making you more confident?"

"Wh-What do you mean? I-I've always been confident."

"Oh my God," Leslie laughed, and while she did she shifted in her seat, knocking her leg against Aurelio's. He loved making her laugh. She looked at him with a smile. Her eyes swept along his face, lingered a split second longer at his mouth, then found his eyes again. "How can you be even cuter when you're so tired?"

Aurelio's cheeks grew warm. Sometimes he hated how easily she could make him blush. Sometimes he liked it. Right now, this moment, just him and Leslie and no one else--it felt right. Any confusion torturing his head just...left. Leslie's presence had always been comforting, but now it felt like something else, something familiar, a puzzle piece in its right place on the right board. 

He hadn't felt like this in a long time.

"Do you plan on breaking up with your boyfriend?" Aurelio asked.

Leslie sighed. "I'm not sure yet. I feel like I'm being unfair to him because I'm constantly comparing him to how he used to be, you know? It's like I want his old dry humor and composure and, and just...overall, his older personality was a lot more attractive to me. It's not like he's a bad person now. He's just a little different, but people change and that's normal and I should accept that, right?"

Well, this was a fear of Aurelio's. Change. It kept ruining everything. It always did. He didn't know what to tell Leslie. He didn't even know what to think about this entire situation. Like most things recently, Leslie and her boyfriend and their relationship hadn't sat right with him anyway. Something felt wrong there. It had been one of the things he kept forgetting, too.

"Do you plan on breaking up with Blair?" Leslie asked, sliding a finger distractedly along the table.

Breakup...with Blair.

What?

Aurelio's heart skipped a beat. "Huh?"

"You don't sound so happy in this relationship."

"What relationship?"

Frowning, Leslie straightened. "You and Blair. You're dating. But you told me recently it's been really uncomfortable for you."

"Why...Why the hell would I date Matt's crush? Why would I do that to him?"

"...Elio?" Concern flooded Leslie's eyes, and right now Aurelio couldn't understand a single thing. "Blair isn't Matt's crush. She's always been yours."

No way.

Leslie was Aurelio's crush. She had always been.

"No." Aurelio shook his head. "Blair is Matt's crush. And I'm sure she likes him too but he acts uninterested because he thinks he's out of her league and he's scared of rejection."

"That's...that's what you used to think. You thought you were out of her league. You were scared of her rejecting you," Leslie said. "Elio...I think it's happening right now. You're forgetting that you and Blair are together."

No.

Goddamnit. No.

At this point, Aurelio's gut told him to trust whatever his subconscious mind was trying to tell him. All these slip-ups, every time he forgot shit, they had to have meaning.

"Leslie, listen. Me and Blair...We don't make sense--"

Keys jiggled in the distance. Leslie froze and looked past Aurelio, at the door, straining to make out the noise. Aurelio looked back too, then glanced at Leslie again. "Your mom?" he asked.

"How in the world?" Leslie sprang up and peeked outside the window. "Her car! Oh my God. Why would she be here at this time?" Panicked, she caught Aurelio's arm and hauled him to his feet. "She won't like this. She won't like this at all--"

Leslie's mom stood at the threshold. She was a tall woman with a face withered by anger and envy. Probably younger than she looked. Aurelio and Leslie stared back at her. The thing was, she looked absolutely pissed, but also not pissed at all. A calm, collected stance but anger blazing in her eyes alone. It made sense. She had always disliked Aurelio, but only ever expressed it in side-eyeing and quiet remarks and muttering.

The woman placed her purse on the counter near her, then she looked at Leslie again and pointed at Aurelio.

"What's this crazy scumbag doing here?"