Her eyes were shining like stars, her soft voice were music to my ears, her pink lips were tempting and I could just see her smile everyday. Who could not fall for her? Who could not love her laugh? Who could not fall for her smile that never ever fades? Her smile that makes me weak and strong at the same time. I love her so much and I wish she knew, but I can't let her know.

She is my best friend, but she is also my best friend's girlfriend. Reiner never knew my feelings for [F/n], but I knew how much he loves her, I just couldn't compete with my best friend. But this is [F/n] we're talking about, almost everyone loves her! Everyone wants to be with her as if she was a trophy that's worth more than gold. Reiner won among all of us. How lucky of him. Why am I even saying this? I didn't fight for my love, I'm just a coward.

I see her from afar laughing at Reiner's flirty jokes. How sweet her laugh is. I hear footsteps from behind me I turn around and see Annie walking up to me.

"Still spying on her?" Annie said. I sighed and looked away from them.

"I-it's not spying... I'm just staring at her, admiring h-her beauty." I said clarifying her. Annie shakes her head and rolled her eyes.

"You're only hurting yourself if I you don't do anything."

"What else can I do? Reiner already has her."

"Move on, dimwit." Annie said harshly. Move on? Should I really move on? Why am still holding on to her when I already know I have no chance? Why am I so crazy about her? Her kindness makes her more beautiful, her smiles and her shiny eyes are in perfect harmony, she looks so innocent. If only i had the guts to tell her how I feel... I would've been in Reiner's place.

"Hm in deep thought are we now Bertholdt?" Reiner suddenly said while placing his hand on my arm. Try not to shove it away...

"Hi Bertholdt~ you okay? You look stressed." [F/n] said.

'You have no idea...' I thought.

"I-I'm fine, don't worry about me." I lied.

"Right." [F/n] said sarcastically. "You're acting all weird lately Bertholdt, whats wrong?" She asked.

"The training probably stressed me out." I shrug and tried not to look or sound bitter.

"You're right, trianing has been really tough... Well let's go grab dinner!" [F/n] exclaimed. I waved my hand signaling them that I'll pass. I walk away and head off to my room.

Shutting the door harshly, I lay on my bed staring at the candle. I took a deep sigh and closed my eyes already feeling sleepy.

--

Another tiring day and another tiring training. I sat on the huge stone and took my break from hand to hand combat. And once again I searched for the [H/c] haired girl. I see her from afar laughing with Reiner. My heart starts to break once more as I notice how happy she is when around Reiner. Can I do that to her too? I ruffle my hair in frustration and stared at the ground.

"Fuck this shit." I said.

"Oi Bertholdt... You okay?" Eren said.

"Y-yeah..."

"You don't seem okay to me." Eren said sat beside me. Offered me water but simply decline. There was a pause unti Eren broke the silence.

"You know I am Jealous too." Eren gulped down his water.

"What're you talking about?" I said trying to act dumb. Clueless about what he's trying to say.

"Pft, c'mon bro we all have eyes on her." Eren said shaking his head and went to go hang out with Armin.

"R-right.." I muttered.

- the next daaay -

I felt a tap on my shoulder and a female voice calling out my name. It might be her, I hope its her. Finally my ears starts to focus on the voice. I was indeed right. I look into her beautiful eyes. She smiles at me probably at my morning face.

"Bertholdt, hurry up training is going to start." [F/n] said.

"Five more minutes." I joked.

"What are you? A kid? Haha hurry up, you don't wanna anger the midget." She said as she sat on Reiner's bed.

"Where's Reiner?" I asked sitting up from my bed and ruffling my hair.

"Outside." She lies down and whined about being tired. I went to the bathroom and took my bath. I came out of the shower in my towel and [F/n] is already gone. I sigh in sadness and began to wear my clothes for training. As i finished dressing up i hurried my way to the training grounds and began to look for a partner.

I heard a cheerful voice calling out my name. Already knowing who it was but already hoping that she wouldn't take me as her sparring partner.

"Yooooo Bertholdt! Lets spar!" [F/n] beamed along with her bright smile that made me feel weak and strong at the same time.

I never wanted to spar with [F/n]. I wouldn't like to hurt her. I mean I'm not saying that I'm way stronger than her. I just might injure her. I hate to see her in pain it also breaks my heart.

"U-uh sure." I said and gave her a shy smile in return. I haven't been sparring yet but I am really sweating. I know I am a nervous wreck. You all know me for being the sweaty guy.

Me and [F/n] began to spar blocked few kicks and punch but this time as I charge towards her she did the Annie trick on me. And wow, she is a fast learner. She and Annie never trained together. She only saw it when she flipped Eren. I admire her so much.

"Awooosh sorry man, you may be huge but I am strong like you." She laughed and stretched her arm to help me up. I didn't decline the offer. I would like to touch her soft palms. I looked at her as I got up. Her smile just really gets me. Why does it never fade? How come she kept smiling even if she's tired. She is really an Angel. More angelic than Christa.

"You smile a lot." I said trying to act cool.

"Reiner loves it when I smile." She said.

"Does he not worry that you might attract someone with that smile?" I said not knowing that I already sound like I'm into her. She must not know.

"What? Are you crushing on me?" She laughs.

"Excuse me? I never said that. My point is-"

"Yeah yeah I get you. He wouldn't worry a thing. He knows that I'll be his and only his." She smiled and walk off to go check on Reiner.

"I wish you were mine." I mumbled and walked off.

"I hope she doesn't die." Ymir suddenly said making me jolt.

"What're you talking about?" I said looking at her irritated.

"Expeditions in two days Big guy." With that she left leaving Bertholdt scared.

"I must make sure she's fine."

- Two days later-

I kept my eye on [F/n] making sure she's alright. Today's the day, we're getting outside the walls again... I couldn't stop eyeing [F/n] from time to time I already look like a creep.

I also remember what Reiner said to me this morning.

--

"Please Bertholdt, you're on the same wing with [F/n]. Please protect her... Please." Reiner kneels down and pleads. I've never seen him scared before.

"Why are you so scared? We've seen her fight she's good at it." I said reassuring him so he wouldn't worry too much.

"I have a bad feeling about this mission." Reiner said looking straight into my eyes. I don't know what he saw or thought but he was dead serious.

"O-okay, I'll keep an eye on her."

--

I kept my gaze on [F/n] didn't care about looking where I was going. The horse can manage that. It was kind of weird that she still kept that smile of hers. It wasn't a fully smile but she just look happy and calm.

As we finally reached our destination where titans are all piled up. [F/n] prepared her blades already eyeing her prey. Her smile widened a little knowing she'd be in a killing spree later. She gets off of her horse and began to kill the disgusting giants from left to right. I may hold a deep secret but these guys still scares the hell out of me. I never wanted a life like this.

I began to assist her and followed her in case she launches her hook on the wrong tree, I'd be there to catch her. This day I was ready to sacrifice my life for her.

"These fucks are too many!" [F/n] said already having her serious face and I could tell she's getting tired.

"It'll be over--" my sentence was cut by an agony scream coming from [F/n]. Her gear broke in the middle of a fight. My eyes widened as she began to fall on the ground. I took action and swoop her up before hitting on the ground.

"Stay somewhere safe! We'll finish this!" I shouted and began to finish of the remaining titans.

But luck was not in our side today. More came to our side. I saw several signal flares being launched. All were red, black and purple...

"Yan! Fire an emergency!" I hear [F/n] as she rushed to someone who got injured.

Yan takes the signal flare and shoots it up. Seeing a purple smoke shooting up asking for emergency. It's useless, almost every wing was in danger shooting up singals.

Titans came more and more as if we were the target. It all happened so fast the next thing I know [F/n] went missing and some of our comrades. I went down to check up on her. To look for her. I cannot lose her!

Blood splashed as a titan bit of something... No someone. It's head and lower body fell off. I felt the chills as I saw someone being killed in front of me. It was never a good sight.

I almost threw up when I saw who got killed. Decapitated by a naked monster freak.

It was her.

"[F/n]..." all I could say. Yan and Jean finished of the rest of the titans. After slaying all of them. They went down and got closer to me.

"[F/n]?!" Yan shouts in horror. She looks at Jean and punches his shoulder.

"WHY DID YOU COME HERE SO LATE?! WHERE'S THE REST OF THE HELP?!" She screamed.

"T-they're gone.." He said already feeling hurt. Yan fell on her knees and cried out

Me? All I could think of the girl of my dreams. Her eyes showed fear on her decapitated head. Her smile? Gone. That cheerful aura that she once had? Gone. Everything was gone.

My happiness. Gone.

--

3rd person POV

Another unsuccessful mission to the Survey Corps. Bertholdt walk slowly setting [F/n]'s corpse on the wooden cart. Her body, already wrapped with a white cloth. Making things worse? His best friend Reiner, has gone missing. The last item they found that belonged to Reiner was a lucky charm that [F/n] gave to him. Bertholdt took it and kept it in his pocket.

The scouts were almost to the walls. Everyone had a sad expression plastered on their face. Most of their members died and the mission wasn't even a success.

"I'll show those mother fuckers..." Eren mumbled and kept cursing.

"Whats really sad is [F/n]'s death." Armin said. Causing Jean and the other admirers to tear up.

"Reiner too..." Yan said. "I wonder how Bertholdt is taking it..." She added.

"Speaking of Bertholdt where is he?" Armin said causing everyone to look up and around looking for Bertholdt's whereabouts.

"He's gone missing." Ymir said. He's not but soon he'll be.

He was just on the front row already eager to go home. As the gates open Bertholdt pace picked up, still riding his horse. He didnt care if the Commander thinks it was rude. He wanted to escape from all this nightmare.

He lead his horse through the forest of Wall Rose. Far far away from the HQ far away from people he knew. He wanted to start a new life in peace. He was done. His best friend, his love. Gone he didn't want to stay in that place filled with memories. Bertholdt stopped when he saw an abandoned cabin. He gave his horse some water and entered the cabin. He placed his white bag stained with blood on the table and removed what's inside.

[F/n]'s head.

He cries as he kept looking at it in fear and sadness.

"Her smile is gone..." He said in tears. I searched around the house to find some tools. He saw a clear carpentry glue lying on the ground on the other room.

"This'll do." He said and went back to the table. He moved her lips upward to create a smile. He then placed clear carpentry glue on the sides to let it stay in place.

"A little bit on her eyelids to keep it open." He said. Even though feared was still visible in her [E/c] orbs. He didn't care. She was still pretty in his eyes.

Once her lips already formed a smile permanently, Bertholdt himself smiled back and felt the butterflies in his stomach.

"Pretty as ever with that smile." He kissed [F/n]'s forehead and stood up from the chair.

"Lets look for something to preserve your head love." He said while walking out of the cabin ready to search for things that can preserve [F/n]'s head.

"So I can see you smile for me everyday."

End.

You didn't see that coming huh xD

Don't worry if you didn't like the ending just scroll some more, someting's waiting for u down there~

Rawr

The mission was a success... [F/n] ran and searched for Reiner but he was no where to be seen.

"[F/n]..." Christa gave [F/n] a lucky charm that she gave to Reiner years ago. It was stained with blood. [F/n]'s eyes widened as she saw her lovers belonging covered in blood. She couldn't believe it. He's gone. Dead or alive? She didn't know. She sat on the floor and stared at the item silently crying.

"We were supposed to go on a date after this remember?" She said between sobs. Bertholdt looked at the girl and sat beside her.

"I'm sorry [F/n]." He said. She stared at Bertholdt and hug him. She cried loudly as she felt his arms wrap around her.

"It feels just like him!" She screamed.

"Shhhh, hey Reiner doesn't like you crying remember?" Bertholdt said.

"I-i can't help it!" She shouts trying so hard to breath but failed.

"Hey hey calm down breathe in breathe out." Bertholdt said which [F/n] oblige.

"Crying doesn't suit you." Bertholdt said as he wiped [F/n]'s tears.

"I don't know what to do without him... I want to die!" She screamed out in pain.

"He wouldn't like that... Just keep going. He'll love that." he said while tucking her hair behind her ears.

"It's okay I'm here." Bertholdt gave her a tighter hug.

"Thank you so much Bertholdt." She said and gave him a weak smile but it was still bright for his eyes.

"You're really beautiful when you smile. Keep doing that, Reiner will love it as he watch from above." Bertholdt said. Making the girl smile even more and slighty laugh.

After a year of recovering, [F/n] and Bertholdt started dating. Been the happiest and the healthiest relationship.

The end.

There you have it y'all hope you liked the ending xD

Thank you for reading!!

Ja ne~

Ackermanity out!!