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  They set up in their bedroom. Lights at the end of the bed, camera set up and Seokjin's computer turned on with the website pulled up.

  Jungkook wanted to make Seokjin feel so loved. Wanted to kiss, hug, praise, massage, let him reach that high of pleasure with nothing stopping him.

  So, they went live.

  It began just how Jungkook wished for it to.

  He sat Seokjin down at the end of the bed, right in front of the camera, and he climbed onto the bed to straddle the older from behind.

  "Gonna make you feel good, hyung."

  His hands slowly skimmed down Seokjin's arms as he started placing soft kisses on his neck. Seokjin tilted his head, letting Jungkook do what it was that he had planned. His turn to take over.

  " 's good, hyung?" Jungkook asked as he circled his arms around him, caressing his arms, waist, tummy, thighs. Anything he could touch.

  Just trying to make him relax first.

  Seokjin had his own hands on Jungkook's thighs, which were on both sides of him, and he was caressing him as well.

  "Feels good, baby." The older reached for his hand and pulled it up to his lips, a soft kiss on his palm to assure him. "You always make me feel good. You're doing so great, bun."

  But...

  Jungkook's hand clamped onto Seokjin's and he stopped for a moment, simply staring ahead.

  You always make me feel good.

  That's a lie.

  That's a straight-up lie. Jungkook made Seokjin cry more than once just last week. Seokjin doesn't always feel good when he's with him.

  He's lying. Seokjin is lying and it's all Jungkook's fault. He's lying to make Jungkook feel better, isn't he? Isn't that what this is?

  "Bun..?"

  A weak cry left Jungkook and he hadn't even realized that he had merely quit doing anything. Didn't realize that he had tears in his eyes.

  He backed away from Seokjin and sucked in his bottom lip to stop it from quivering. Seokjin followed him, though, turning around to find out what he was doing.

  Legs pulled up to his chest, tears in his eyes, trying not to cry. Jungkook hates being so sensitive. But, just now realizing that Seokjin may not be happy, it upsets him.

  Is Seokjin truly happy with him?

  How many times does Jungkook get to hurt his feelings so horribly? So... ignorant. So selfish. There's no way Seokjin could be happy with that. With him.

  "Jungkook, baby..."

  Seokjin reached out to him. Of course he did. He always does. Always forgives, always forgets. Lets Jungkook get away with anything.

  He knows Seokjin loves him. But is Seokjin happy with him?

  "Hyung." He swallowed thickly.

  "Baby, why did you stop—" Seokjin furrowed his eyebrows as Jungkook finally blinked, those stinging tears finally slipping from his eyes.

  He quickly wiped them away, but Seokjin was just as quick, pulling Jungkook in by his legs and pulling him into his lap. Again.

  "Baby, hey, don't cry..." He kissed the tears on his cheek, only making Jungkook start crying. Fully crying.

  "H-Hyung," he choked on his words as he spoke. Choked as Seokjin started thumbing at his waist to calm him.

  "What's wrong, baby?"

  What's wrong? Everything.

  He's so awful. Guilty for everything that happened last week. Guilty for Seokjin, who seems too in love to care. But Jungkook does care.

  If Seokjin isn't happy, then what's the point?

  "H-How could you love me?" Jungkook sniffled and clenched his fists hard, trying not to cry. "I've done n-nothing to deserve your love. Why? Why do you s-stay with me at all?"

  He hiccuped between words, crying also because of that shame. Childish, careless with Jin's feelings, being too sensitive for himself. Plain selfish. Why is he loved? Why does he deserve Kim Seokjin?

  But here Seokjin is, taking his shit yet again. "Baby." The older brushed the hair out of his eyes. "I throw gummy bears at you to mess with you."

  What?

  "I annoy you every morning by waking you up just to kiss you."

  Well, yeah, but—

  "The dishes haven't even been washed yet because I'm too lazy."

  Jungkook frowned. "But t-those are all little things, hyung."

  Seokjin cupped his cheeks, wiping the tears with his thumbs and making sure Jungkook's eyes were meeting his.

  "Baby, don't you remember who I am? Or who I was when we met? A complete piece of shit. A jealous asshole. That's who I was," he reminded him. "If you can love me through all of that, then surely I can love you through this, right?"

  Seokjin seemed so focused on making sure Jungkook knows he's not the only imperfect one here. But still. Seokjin worked on himself. He showed himself worthy long ago. But every issue lately seems to be because of Jungkook.

  Being sensitive on vacation, not wanting children, Mark, Jae-Soo. When does it end? When does Jungkook stop being so childish? When does he just not fuck up?

  Why can't he be perfect?

  "I- I want you to be happy, though." He frowned at the worried look Seokjin gave him.

  "I... I am happy, Jungkook-ah," he muttered. "I am in love with you. You being here with me is enough to make me happy."

  In love.

  Jungkook inhaled deeply, trying to stop his tears. "But I keep hurting you, hyung. I-I don't want to hurt you because I'm in love with you, too."

  "Bun, if you don't want to hurt me, then you're gonna have to realize that you hurting yourself is hurting me."

  With the slight tilt of his head, Jungkook responded, "I'm hurting myself by hurting you, though."

  "That's not what I mean," Seokjin chuckled. "You're kinda naive, baby. Every person that comes along, you trust. You don't realize... Like Jae-Soo being so touchy with you. That isn't okay, baby."

  Well. Jin's right. He always tries to look for the positive, never realizes that anything is wrong until Seokjin tells him it's wrong. Not until Seokjin tries to protect him, and he still doesn't even get it then.

  A soft chuckle left Seokjin. "The first time was a mistake. This time, you apologized and I forgave you. We'll never be perfect, bunny. Just know that I love you and we'll be okay. We'll be okay. You just need to trust me."

  "But—"

  "No buts," Seokjin cut him off.

  He leaned in and kissed Jungkook, the seal to Jungkook's thoughts. Soft lips, still cupping his cheeks, pouring all of his love into the kiss.

  And as he pulled away, Jungkook could still feel it. Love. Of course, Seokjin finds a way to ease Jungkook. To reassure him.

  "I told you I'll never leave you." He picked Jungkook's wrist up and twisted it, finding the magnetic heart on his black bracelet. He held his own bracelet up to it and let their hearts connect with a clink.

  He looked back at Jungkook with a warm smile.

  "Mine." Seokjin pecked his lips again, but as he pulled away, his eyes drifted away and— "Oh, fuck."

  He quickly lifted his hand, arm extending towards the camera. The camera, which was still recording.

Jungkook gawked as Seokjin turned off the camera, ending the live. They were fucking live!

  "Shit, I-I'm so sorry." Jungkook cursed as Seokjin glanced back at him, his eyes wide.

  "Uh— It's fine. That was both of our mistake," he let out.

  Right. Sure. It totally wasn't Jungkook's fault yet again.

  He'll let himself believe that. He'll let Seokjin lie just this one last time.

~

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