TW:  exhaustion, overworking, astraphobia, and depression

*Astraphobia: fear of thunder and lightning

A/N: You see him cry for the first time, part 1.

~ ~ | ATEEZ | ~ ~

🌸 Park Seonghwa 🌸

Everyone had been working a lot harder for the comeback.

You knew how much this comeback meant to the boys — they were really looking forward to releasing and producing new music for their fans. You knew that they were hard-working guys, and will always give 110% into whatever they do.

However, Seonghwa was working a little too hard for your liking.

It started out with him coming home late at night, having stayed at the studio to get a lot more practice in. The first few times it happened, you were understanding; you knew that there was a little bit more pressure on the group with the comeback. When his late returns started becoming a regular occurrence, that's when you started getting concerned.

On top of his extensive practicing, he was barely sleeping. He'd eat meals or snacks, but he'd only get between 4 to 5 hours of sleep most nights. Seonghwa's lack of proper rest plus his extensive hours in the studio were bound to put a strain on himself, and you knew this.

You had just finished folding laundry when Hongjoong called, telling you that Seonghwa had fallen after missing a beat in some choreography. You rushed to KQ, running down the hall to see your boyfriend sitting on a couch, a disappointed look plastered on his face. You immediately sat in his lap, knowing that he needed you right now.

"Guys... can we have a couple minutes please?" You asked the boys, who were equally as concerned as you.

Hongjoong led the boys and himself out of the room, respecting your wish to talk to Seonghwa in private. You felt touched that every member of ATEEZ gave their eldest hyung supportive words as they walked out the door.

As soon as it was just you two in the room, you saw Seonghwa's bottom lip start to tremble. Before he knew it, he was crying. It broke your heart to see and hear him crying like this.

"Oh, baby." You cooed, letting the boy cry into your shoulder as he let his tears fall. "It's okay. It's okay, Hwa."

Seonghwa's sobs wracked his body, which made your heart hurt even more for him.

"I-I tripped over my own feet, Y/N. I fell in front of everybody. It was so embarrassing."

You pressed a kiss to his head, running your fingers through his hair. "Baby... did you sleep a lot last night? Be honest; I won't judge."

Seonghwa shook his head, "I slept for maybe 4 hours last night. I got home late from practicing."

You carefully cupped your boyfriend's face, wiping away his tears with your thumbs. "Seonghwa, I know you want to do your absolute best work for this comeback — believe me, I know — but you can't keep going like this. You're tiring yourself out by practicing late into the night, and you're not getting enough sleep. It's not healthy. Just please promise me that you won't do this ever again."

Seonghwa nodded, his hands on top of your own. "I promise. I'm sorry, Kitten. I'm so sorry for worrying you and scaring you. I'm so sorry."

You gave him a smile and then kissed him. "It's okay. You're already forgiven. I love you, Hwa. I love you so much."

Seonghwa smiled as he looked at you. "I love you so much more, Y/N."

☀️ Kim Hongjoong ☀️

Hongjoong does a lot for ATEEZ... but sometimes, he does a little too much.

The younger '98 liner was still in his studio at KQ, where he'd locked himself away in for the past few days. He was desperately trying to write more lyrics for a song, but he just couldn't seem to figure out what to write.

Hongjoong was getting frustrated, and he was less than happy about it, too.

You had just opened the door to his studio, a frown on your face. Hongjoong hadn't been home in 3 days, which worried you deeply. You decided enough was enough, and that he was going to come home tonight... no exceptions.

You were prepared to rant about his behavior, but you stopped yourself when you got a really good look at him. Papers were scattered everywhere, and his hands were gripping at his hair tightly.

You could hear faint sniffles from him which made you worry even more. You took small steps towards the rapper, feeling upset when you realized why he was sniffling.

Hongjoong had gotten so frustrated that he'd started crying.

You knelt down when you walked to his chair, hating that he was so frustrated and sad. "Joong?"

Hongjoong heard your voice and he looked in your direction, eyes teary and puffy. "Y/N..." he choked out between cries.

You took a seat on the floor, motioning for your boyfriend to do the same. The minute he sat down, you wrapped an arm around his shoulders. "Talk to me, love. What's got you so upset?"

"I-I've been writing a new song and I was trying to finish it. But I just can't think of anything to write, and I'm frustrated," Hongjoong hiccuped.

You kissed his head, resting your own on his shoulder. "It's okay to get frustrated, Joong. But it's not okay for you to overwork yourself for days on end. You're burning yourself out too quickly."

The man still had tears running down his cheeks, but he was listening to what you were saying. "I didn't mean to," he said in a soft voice.

"I know," you told him in the same tone. "But you need to come home, get some proper sleep, and take a few days off. Just you and me for 3 days."

Hongjoong bit on his lip. "But they need me."

"They're always going to need you, love. However, I think they'd rather have you at your best than overworked and sleep-deprived." You countered. "Sometimes... you just need to step away from something for a bit, and come back to it with a fresh perspective."

After a moment of hesitance, Hongjoong nodded in agreement with your words. He was starting to calm down, his cries and tears now subsided. "Thank you, Princess."

"For what?" You asked, looking up to meet his eyes.

Hongjoong pressed a few kisses to your head and lips, a smile on his face, "For loving me and taking care of me."

✨ Jeong Yunho ✨

Everyone has a secret fear... even Yunho.

The forecast called for thunderstorms tonight. You never had a problem with storms — sometimes, you found them to be background noises while you were sleeping.

Tonight would not be the case.

You were woken up from your sleep at 2 am by someone shaking your shoulder. You sat up in your bed to see a tall figure in the dark room. The culprit was none other than Yunho.

"Baby, it's 2 in the morning. You should be in bed right now," you told him.

"I-I..." Yunho tried, but couldn't form words.

A flash of lightning shone through the window in your room, showing you the dancer's tear-stained face. A clap of thunder roared outside, making the boy flinch.

Realization hit you like a brick wall. "Yunho... are you scared of the storm?" You asked softly.

Another lightning flash sent panic through Yunho, causing him to let out a terrified whimper. The loud thunder that followed was enough to make him crawl into the bed with you, his body shaking from fear and from his crying.

You collected the tall boy in your arms, rubbing his back. "Shhh, Yunho. It's okay. I'm right here; I promise you're okay."

"It's loud and scary, baby. I'm sorry for waking you up," Yunho blubbered.

You pressed kisses to his face. "Don't be sorry. You have nothing to be sorry for. I'm glad you woke me up — you're scared and you need me. Don't ever apologize for being scared, okay?"

Yunho nodded, feeling his heart start to relax. Being here with you really helped him. "Thank you, baby. I love you so much."

You smiled and kissed his nose, your hands getting lost in his hair. "You're very welcome. I love you too, Yunho."

Half an hour later, you were both asleep in each other's arms. Yunho didn't even flinch when he slept when the thunder and lightning would periodically occur. He had you, and that was more than enough for him.

He will be forever thankful to have you in his life.

🌙 Kang Yeosang 🌙

Sometimes people just have bad days, and Yeosang knows that better than anyone.

He didn't know why or how it started, but he just woke up and couldn't muster any energy to smile or feel happy today. Instead, he just stared at the ceiling, a million thoughts running through his head.

Wooyoung — Yeosang's best friend/roommate — burst into their bedroom with a bright smile. "Yeosang, get your lazy butt up! It's time for breakfast."

"'M not hungry," Yeosang muttered, his eyes fixated on the ceiling.

"But Seonghwa made chicken and waffles," Wooyoung pouted. "You love chicken and waffles."

Yeosang glanced at Wooyoung briefly. "I'm. Not. Hungry." He said through his teeth. "I'm feeling empty today. Now will you please go?"

Wooyoung looked down and walked out of the room, wondering why Yeosang was acting very odd.

You were sat at the table, sitting between Hongjoong and Yunho. You usually sat with Yeosang, but you thought he might be sleeping in today since he hadn't been downstairs yet.

Wooyoung shuffled his way into the kitchen, a sad look on his face. You pouted at that — Wooyoung was like a kid brother to you.

"Ah, what's wrong, Woo?" You asked.

Wooyoung gave you the biggest pair of sad eyes you've ever seen. "Yeosang snapped at me when I told him breakfast was ready. He said he wasn't hungry, and that he was feeling empty today."

You froze, dropping your fork that had been in your hand. 'Feeling empty' was a code word between you and Yeosang. You guys created it to discreetly tell one another that today was a bad day.

"Are you sure that's what he said, Woo? Are you 100% sure?"

"I'm sure, Y/N." Wooyoung confirmed.

Seonghwa wore a confused look on his face. "I don't understand. Does that mean something to you, Y/N?"

You looked at the eldest, a look of urgency in your eyes. "I need to be excused from the table."

"Is something going on that we don't know about?" Seonghwa asked, concern growing in his eyes.

You bit on your lip. "I can't say — I really can't. But I need to be excused please."

The eldest boy nodded, allowing you to shoot up from your seat and leave the kitchen table. You trekked upstairs and walked into Yeosang's room, seeing the fresh tears roll down his cheeks.

"Hey, Sang. Woo said you're feeling empty. Talk to me, baby." You said, laying down at his side. Yeosang wasn't really one to talk about his feelings a lot, so he had to be prompted to talk about them when he was feeling depressed like this.

Yeosang looked at you with his tear-filled eyes, pain and sadness in them. "I don't know why — I swear I don't know. I just woke up feeling so... upset and-and unhappy. I snapped at my best friend, and I-I-I can't stop crying. I'm having a bad day, Muffin."

"That's okay, Sang. And we both know that it's okay to have bad days," you said softly, pulling the boy into your arms. "It's okay to just be sad sometimes. It doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you; it just means you're going through a lot right now, and you need a day to get things off your chest."

Yeosang cried harder into you, just letting go of all his negative feelings. The buildup of emotions he had inside of him was washing over his mind in waves, crashing down with every cry and sob Yeosang let out.

Eventually, the blonde cried himself to sleep, still curled up in your arms. While Yeosang rested, you kept him comfort by running your fingers through his hair and pressing kisses to his face.

You hated to see him hurt so much, but the important thing is to be there for him when he is hurting.

And when you're doing just that... Yeosang finds that he's adding another reason why he's in love with you to his list.

~ ~ | ATEEZ | ~ ~

2117 words

Next Update: Seeing Him Cry - Maknae Line

Published: 4/14/2021