koinophobia (n)
the fear that you've lived an ordinary life.

_____

my koinophobia hangs around my neck like a noose,
it's ropes whispering in my ears.
sinister truths that further feed my fear.
i never liked the idea of normal.
but I'm never anything but.
the idea of a mediocre life haunted my dreams,
wasted purpose,
unfulfilled destiny,
untold story.
i am determined that these won't be my truths.
and when death comes,
he'll find me smiling because I would have truly lived.