***SAM’S POV***

I woke up feeling weird, and I knew it could be for multiple reasons. As I stared at my ceiling fan I remembered everything that had happened last night, from us arguing about my mental problems to me crying, and then to me kissing Megan. We had talked about so many things last night, and for the first time I had actually cried in front of Megan, which was obviously embarrassing for me.

But thinking back on it I knew Megan hadn’t judged me, she had actually seemed a bit happy.

I sat up in my bed, feeling the sleep fall off of me as I glanced at my clock. I had slept pretty late, which meant that Megan and I had stayed up pretty last night.

But I was still so confused about everything.

All the things she had said and showed to me, I definitely would need a lot of time to think about them. Megan knew a lot more than I used to give her credit for, but now after having that talk with her last night… maybe giving what she had said a second thought would be helpful.

I smelt fresh coffee brewing in the kitchen, knowing Megan was already up and possibly waiting for me to join her. I remembered kissing her last night before we had gone to bed, and the reason as to why I had done that was still a bit fuzzy.

Why had I kissed her?

I wasn’t drunk, although I had been a bit buzzed I was still very in control of myself, so that wasn’t it. It obviously wasn’t because we had been in a heated argument, or in a very close embrace, so the mood hadn’t been set for a kiss either.

But in that moment before she disappeared into Shawn’s room I wanted her to go to bed thinking about me, so maybe that’s where the kiss had come from.

I lifted myself from my bed then, walking slowly over to my bathroom and hopping into the shower. I washed quickly, not wanting to keep Megan waiting too long, besides, I wouldn’t be able to see her tonight before Shawn got home.

It was my first night on the job.

As much as I wanted Megan to show up tonight I knew she wouldn’t, simply because it would be a little weird. I didn’t blame her for not wanting to show up, but it did depress me a little.

Seeing her face there would mean a lot, and realizing that only confused me even more.

I hopped out the shower and dried, throwing on a pair of soffee shorts and a T-shirt, realizing I had nothing to do until later anyway.

Then I felt my phone buzz.

I expected it to be Blair or Shawn, but definitely not Emma.

Emma texted, What are you doin’ tonight?

I rolled my eyes, realizing she had totally forgotten that it was my first night at Jinx’s. I typed back, I told you I had work tonight.

It took her a little while to respond, Oh, okay, well never mind. Have a good night at work. XX

I threw my phone on my bed, knowing that she was either doing this to piss me off or… to fucking piss me off. She had ignored me almost all break and then she sends me a total of two text messages in the last five days?

Seriously?

I shook it off, realizing I needed to end it with Emma soon to spare anymore hard feelings, but getting around to it seemed impossible.

It’s like she knew what was going to happen, so she was avoiding me.

I walked out into the kitchen only to see Megan and all her natural beauty sitting at my counter. Her dark hair was up in a pony-tail, and her over-sized T and pajama shorts just made her look even more stunning.

God I was really messed up over her.

And I had realized the thoughts about Emma had vanished momentarily, thanks to none other than Megan Adams.

She looked up from her laptop, smiling slightly, “You’re up before one, I’m surprised.”

I laughed forcefully, “Ha-ha, I’m a working girl, so I can’t be sleeping all day anymore.”

She sipped her coffee as she studied me, “Have any idea what you’re gonna wear tonight?”

I smiled, “Are you getting protective of me already?”

She tilted her head and narrowed her eyes, “No, I’m just curious.”

Her trying not to flirt back with me was adorable, and also my favorite challenge to accept.

I pressed on, “Well, I guess I’ll have to model my work attire for you later.”

She seemed to shy away for a split second, which led me to believe she was trying to hide something from me. I smiled as I joined next to her at the counter, looking at her laptop and seeing that she was working on grades, which was boring.

I sighed, “Are you really doing grades?”

“I am a teacher, Sam.”

Our shoulders touched slightly, which was actually part of my plan, but she didn’t have to know that. I wondered what she thought about me coming onto her and flirting, I just never had the guts to actually ask her.

I always thought it annoyed her on some level, but maybe somewhere deep down she actually enjoyed it.

Or so I hoped.

Then looking at her grade sheet I remembered something I never really got around to asking her.

“So what does Coach Lee think about my absence?”

Megan sighed, “I told her you needed some time off, and that you’ll be back once the season starts.”

I furrowed my brow, “That’s it?”

She nodded, “Yup, which starts in January, by the way.”

“I know when softball season starts Megan.”

“Just saying.”

I questioned, “She didn’t ask why I needed time off?”

Megan looked at me and shrugged, “I told her you needed to focus more on school but, you obviously chose to spend your free time on anything but school.”

I shrugged, “I’m passing.”

She rolled her eyes, “Barely passing, Sam. One bad test and you’re going to fail the semester.”

“But I’m still passing, so…”

She groaned, “You’re so stubborn.”

I laughed then, “I must get it from my momma.”

She laughed along with me, seeming to actually get the joke I had made and sipped on her coffee once more. I just watched her and allowed myself to admire her in secrecy and wonder what would become of us when she eventually moved out, which would be soon.

She sighed, “You know I can check your grades in all of your classes?”

I just looked at her, “You creep on me?”

She rolled her eyes, “No, I just check on you from time to time. How are you passing Calculus with a better grade than in History?”

While we were being honest, “I sit next to the smartest kid in class, so I guess you can put two and two together.”

“In other words, you cheat.”

I smirked, “Miss Adams, are you accusing me of something?”

“You literally just told me you cheated.”

I smiled, “I don’t remember specifically saying that.”

“Whatever Sam.”

I knew that I wasn’t doing too hot in History, but really, could you blame me? Look at my teacher, hell, I had to look at her not only in the class but at home too!

She groaned, “Like really, your worst grade is in my class.”

I shrugged, “That must say something about your teaching methods.”

She shoved me, “You’re the only one with a D in my class, Sam.”

That came as a shock to me, which only led me to one conclusion, “You’re trying to fail me on purpose!”

She laughed, “As if. I want you out of my class as soon as possible, trust me.”

I frowned, “And why’s that?”

She just looked at me, “Because you’re a fifth year senior and you really need a diploma of some sort before you’re twenty.”

This time I rolled my eyes at her very mean comment obviously aimed at my intelligence. I defended, “Just because I’m not book smart doesn’t mean I’m not street smart.”

“I think the words you’re looking for is common sense, which doesn’t help you much in the work field.”

“Which is why school is a waste of time.”

She eyed me, eventually deciding that arguing with me was a waste of time, so she stood. She looked down at me, “Show me what you’re wearing tonight.”

I stood along with her, wondering why she even cared considering. I smiled, “What? You’re curious but you don’t want to come see me tonight?”

Then she shoved me towards my room and smiled, “Just go put it on and show me whore.”

I laughed, almost stumbling into my room from her shove as I looked at her, “Do you want me to strip for you as well?”

I watched her cheeks redden slightly as she frowned, attempting to hide the fact that I had made her feel something inappropriate. She pointed towards my room, “Go change.”

I frowned ,”You’re just no fun.”

I closed the door behind me, wondering how I made Megan fell when I flirted with her like so. Did I turn her on? Annoy her? Confuse her?

I just wanted to know so damn bad but I was too scared to actually ask her.

I removed my top layer of clothes, leaving me to hurry around my room in just my underwear. I pulled out a dark muscle tank that had the Jack Daniels styled writing, but instead of Jack Daniels, Jinx’s was written along the shirt. I preferably loved the muscle shirt and I knew the neck line would show off just enough to tease whoever had the pleasure of seeing me in it.

I decided since it was late November I would settle on tight ripped up jeans over cut-off shorts, and derermined summer would be the right time to wear those. I tugged on my pants and laced up my boots, tightening my bracelets and pulling up my bra to show just enough cleavage.

Resist this Megan Adams…

I messed up my hair a bit to give my look a little kink and then walked out, watching Megan’s gaze fully take me in. Hey eyes dilated at the sight, and I knew that she was obviously not disapproving my attire simply because I knew I looked hot.

She nodded, “You look good.”

I frowned, “That’s it?”

She shrugged, “What would you like me to say, Sam?”

I narrowed my eyes, studying her body language and realizing she was growing a bit nervous at my attention being on her. I continued, “I want you to tell me what you really think.”

She shifted her weight to one leg and leaned on the wall to study me. She answered, “Well, I really think you look a bit slutty with your tits hanging out at the top, but all in all you look like a normal bartender.”

I shook my head, “You’re such a mood killer.”

“Once again, I’m not trying to set a mood.”

I rolled my eyes, “Just answer like a friend would, not a teacher.”

I watched her look at me, her eyes traveling from my breasts and down my legs. She held her hands up, “What do you want to hear? You’re hot?”

I smiled, “That’s more like it.”

She groaned, “I just wanted to see your outfit, not try to be pressured into hitting on you.”

I took a few steps closer to her then, watching her shift uncomfortably as I approached her slowly. I smiled, “Answer me this…,” I leaned on the wall in front of her, “If I wasn’t your student and I was just a hot bartender, would you be compelled to stay all night and talk to me?”

She smirked shyly, already knowing what I was asking but I knew she wasn’t going to play along. She shrugged, “I don’t know, Danna seems to be more my type.”

I frowned at the obvious attempt to annoy me and shrugged, laughing it off, “I’m not sure if she’s into boring History teachers.”

Megan eyed me, “Yea well, I’m not into narcissistic nineteen year olds.”

I laughed, “That’s what they all say.”

“All who? Your multiple one night stands?”

I don’t know why but I wanted Megan to crave me, because I knew deep down I craved her in some weird fashion. I craved her attention, and her touch, and her kisses, and not being able to do what I pleased with her made me feel like I was starving in her company. I just wanted to touch her and feel her, I wanted her to want me like I wanted her.

But she would never know that of course.

I responded sarcastically, “No, all of the pedophile teachers that get arrested for having affairs with their students.”

I knew I had gotten under her skin with that one, even though I had obviously meant it as a joke. She rolled her eyes and got mad fairly quickly, turning around to try and end this conversation.

I grabbed her arm, spinning her around, “Megan I’m joking, you’re not a pedophile.”

She shook her head, “You know, that was actually pretty hurtful.”

I frowned, “I was just kidding.”

Megan seemed to be thinking about a lot in her magnificent head, but I could tell she was to torn between wanting to tell me. She stepped away from me, “You don’t understand how hard it is, how much it eats me up knowing what we’ve done. You throwing it to my face like that just makes it even worse.”

I held up my hands, “Megan, I’m sorry.”

She shook her head, and I already knew what she was about to do. She was about to try and distance herself from me, because for some reason she couldn’t handle the truth. She was guilty, and I was too, but it was obviously different for her because she was the teacher, believe it or not.

I continued to try and keep her next to me with her hand in mine, “Our situation was different, much different, you know that. You’re acting like we’re literally having an affair when all we did was kiss a few times.”

She just looked at me, “We’ve kissed more than a few times, Sam.”

I shrugged, “And? It happens, like you told me all that time ago.”

She looked at the clock, and then back at me, and I knew she was about to dismiss herself from the situation. She slipped her hand out of mine and sighed, “I have to get dressed, I’m supposed to be meeting Naomi.”

I dropped my hands, feeling a little sad and deflated at this moment. I didn’t want Megan to leave upset with me, and I couldn’t fix it because I had work tonight.

And Thursday was obviously not gonna be a good day to talk.

I felt compelled to make her try and stay, even if it was for a tiny amount of time. I didn’t want her to leave me, I didn’t want her to try and runaway like she did every time she got scared of our situation.

But what could I say?

She backed away from me and began heading into the bathroom, but I knew our conversation was over. The reality of Megan and I was harsh, but it was the truth, and that was knowing Megan and I would always be this complicated relationship, for many reasons.

“Can you reconsider coming see me tonight?”

She looked at me from the bathroom before closing the door, “We’ll see.”

But we all knew what that really meant, and it meant that she wouldn’t even consider it, especially after what had just happened.

~ ~ ~ ~

So far the night was great, besides the fact that I was behind the bar instead of at the bar drinking. For the most part it had been pretty busy but it still didn’t feel quite like a job, more like something I would do for fun, which I took as a good sign.

Not to mention all of the tips I was getting.

It was late, around 11:00 and the music was still pumping loud. I was grateful I didn’t have school in the morning because I was informed I would be staying here till closing.

Which was till 2:00 AM.

The crowd was steady and the music was on point, but I couldn’t help but watch the door in anticipation. I had this tiny glimmer of hope that Megan would walk through that door at any moment, even when my brain knew she wasn’t going to show.

I felt bad for what I had said to her but I couldn’t take it back, and it had obviously bit me in the ass. I hated thinking that Megan was mad at me because that meant she wasn’t going to talk to me, and we all knew how good she was at ignoring me.

I rang up two more shots for two girls as she slipped me their cash, one of them eyeing me a little harder than the other as I flashed a smile.

Megan was right about one thing, I sure was getting hit on, a lot.

No matter how hard I tried, the thought of Megan always seemed to resurface. It was like the same song was playing over and over in my head and I could do nothing to get rid of it. I didn’t mind thinking about Megan, but knowing she was upset with me and was moving out Friday only made me feel more depressed.

Then someone spoke in my direction, “You’re actually behind the bar now?”

I looked up and into the familiar but not so familiar eyes of a raven-haired girl. After pondering the thought of her I recognized her as the girl who had been all over me for my birthday.

I smiled half-heartedly, “I’ve got to pay off my tab debt somehow.”

She laughed, and she was prettier than I had remembered. The same red lipstick and the same hot, tight ass jeans she had on all to make her completely irresistible to any lesbian with eye sight.

She told me what she would like to drink and I poured, watching her reaction to me the entire time. She was still checking me out, and I knew my attire wasn’t helping the situation at hand because I knew I looked hot.

I slid her the drink and she spoke, “So what ever happened to you the night you were supposed to come home with me?”

I felt my cheeks blush at the thought of Megan picking me up like a teenager at the movies. I rolled my eyes, “My brother sent his girlfriend to come pick me and my friend up, and she obviously wasn’t taking no for an answer.”

I watched her move in front of me, smiling, “Well, all this time I thought you had ditched me for a Victoria Secret model when in reality she was just your taxi driver.”

I smiled, still trying to push the thoughts of Megan from my brain, “Simple mistake, but I’m not drinking tonight so I don’t need a taxi.”

I watched the girl bite her lip and smile as she sipped her drink, taking me in as I tried to focus on more customers rather than just her. It sucked trying to run game whenever you were trying to run drinks to every alcoholic in this place.

I glanced at the girl, whom I still didn’t know her name, and wondered how old she was. I had been carding people all night to protect my ass, but I didn’t card her.

I finished up pouring the last of my drinks and walked casually up to her, “You know, I never got to card you.”

She switched her eyes up to me and smirked, “That could get you in a lot of trouble Sam.”

She slid me her card and I studied it, finally catching her name, and my heart sunk at the sight of it. I swallowed a big lump as I slid the card back, trying to muster up a response.

Her name was Meagan.

“Yea it could’ve, excuse me,” I walked through the back doors to the storage room as I tried to compose my thoughts. What were the odds of the girl’s name would be Meagan, of all fucking names it had to be that?

I mean sure, I knew Megan was a popular name but seriously?

It was like she was everywhere and I couldn’t escape it.

I grabbed more mixers and walked out of the storage room, suddenly feeling a lot weirder than I had. I wished I never would’ve learned that girl’s name, because now there was no way I would be able to sleep with her even if I wanted to.

I stacked the mixers in the cooler and glanced at the clock, knowing that I still had a few hours until closing. Meagan was watching me from the bar and no matter how much I told my brain that it wasn’t Megan, I still couldn’t help but feel odd.

Suddenly I was grateful Megan had decided not to come tonight.

I raked my hand through my hair as I realized I had fallen behind from all of the weird thoughts, so I tried to catch up. Danna was still super busy along with all the other bartenders but I was still managing to hold my own.

Now I was just trying to distract myself from the girl at the bar.

I continued taking on new customers as the girl waited patiently for my attention but I wasn’t having it. I didn’t know why I was being so immature about it, I just knew it was weird because her name was in fact Meagan, and that was enough to send me running.

But soon the crowd died down and I was expected to work my customers, including the dark haired girl sitting at the bar.

I leaned casually on the bar as I looked at her, convincing myself that it would be okay if I could just make it through the night. It was just a name, and even though it made me super uncomfortable, all I had to do was avoid using her name.

That was until the devil herself decided to walk through the door.

I watched in agony as Megan stood there next to Naomi in her tight jeans and cropped blouse that showed a little bit more cleavage than I was used to seeing on Megan. She had refused to look at the bar so far but as she walked slowly in those heels I couldn’t help but feel compelled to drop dead right here.

I wanted to run and hide, but I also wanted to climb over the bar and undress Megan at the same time. But all I could do was stand there like a statue.

Naomi spotted me first and tugged on Megan’s hand to bring her over to the bar towards me. I felt my heart hammer hard in my chest as Megan’s icy blue eyes locked with mine, making my legs feel like jello in an instant.

I hadn’t noticed until now that I had actually been holding my breath, and I exhaled quickly before Naomi addressed me.

“Sam, it’s good to see you again!”

I smiled awkwardly, knowing that Meagan and Megan were going to have to meet fairly soon, and it was going to be a major train wreck.

I asked, “Thought you weren’t going to come?”

Megan knew I was addressing her, and she looked a lot more… confident? I didn’t know how to explain it but she had this different aura to her, and it was actually pretty sexy.

She leaned on the bar, exposing more of my cleavage to me as I sucked in a tight breath. She smirked, “Couldn’t pass up the opportunity to actually see Sam Carson working.”

I smiled involuntarily, wishing that it was just Megan and I right now and not a million other people surrounding us. It took a lot of self-control to hold back any sarcastic or sexual comments, but I managed as I tried to do my job.

“What can I get for you two?”

Megan sighed, “Margarita on the rocks, with salt please.”

I held eye contact with Megan a little longer before switching to Naomi, just to have her order a Dos XX’s.

I twirled the glass in the salt as I mixed up her drink, wondering if I could simply go through the rest of the night ignoring Meagan. As much as I thought she was cute and all, having Megan here made all of that irrelevant, even though I should know better.

Plus Meagan was still sitting patiently at the bar.

I handed them their drinks as I eyed Meagan, who seemed to be growing a bit insecure and annoyed. I felt bad, so I knew I should just get it over with and just rip the band-aid off already.

I looked at Megan and Naomi, “Megan, Naomi, this is Meagan.”

The raven-haired Meagan looked at Megan and recognized her immediately, I mean, who wouldn’t? Megan smiled, recognizing the red-lipped girl as the girl from my birthday night who had tried to bring me home. Not to mention that they both knew that they shared the same name.

Yep, it was pretty awkward.

They both smiled, seeming to not care one bit about the other, which was also very awkward because neither of them said anything.

So I dismissed myself.

I smiled, “Gimme a second.”

I ran through the back storage, attempting to calm my heart down as I leaned against the cool wall. I have never been in such an uncomfortable situation, and dealing with it wasn’t coming easy.

I just wanted this night to be over already.

I grabbed a pack of Michelob and walked back to the bar, stacking them into the cooler to chill as I tried to think of something to say to Meagan. I didn’t want to ignore her, but considering that Megan was here, well, it would be hard to keep a conversation going when those haunting blue eyes were staring at me.

But when I looked up the raven-haired girl was gone, and to be honest I was a bit relieved.

I focused my attention back to Megan, and realizing Naomi was off somewhere having a conversation with what looked to be a good friend.

Leaving Megan and I alone.

She looked at me, “How’s your first night going?”

I shrugged, “Fairly well, I’m making a lot of money, and all these girls are hitting on me. It doesn’t really feel like a job.”

She seemed to hesitate after my response, but she bounced back quick, “That was the most awkward introduction I’ve ever faced.”

I smiled, “Even whenever you met me and Blair?”

She nodded, smiling, “Even then.”

I watched her sip her drink and we continued to talk about nothing, but remembering how I had felt when she walked in shocked me. It was like I was completely caught off guard, which I had been, but the way I felt had been so bizarre. I had felt nervous and happy and anxious, it was like everything in the world had kind of stopped and Megan was in the center.

It was actually pretty terrifying.

Explaining the way she made me feel was confusing, because I didn’t understand it, but knowing she showed up tonight because of me was flattering.

There was just no way she didn’t care about me somewhere deep in her heart, even if she didn’t want to admit it out loud.

Time passed on and the crowd eventually began dying, which I was grateful for because I was ready to go. Megan was a bit drunk by this time, and I hadn’t seen Naomi in a while, which worried me because that meant Megan didn’t have a ride home if Naomi had left.

I began shutting down the bar with the rest of the crew, and I fixed a glass of water and slid it to Megan, who was still sitting at the bar sipping her second glass of wine.

I spoke, “Where’d Naomi go?”

Megan waved her hand, “Probably to her girlfriend’s, I told her you would bring me home.”

It was odd hearing this, but I had to remember Megan was pretty drunk. She wasn’t aware what she had agreed to, but I wouldn’t’ mind giving her a ride home since we lived in the same place. I just wanted her to sober up a little bit before getting in my car.

I began restocking and wiping down everything, saving all of the other stuff in the storage as I tried to hurry and get out of here. I just needed to run my check out and count my tips, and then I would be allowed to go.

I walked over to Danna who was finishing up with a bartender’s check-out, and then looked at me smiling, “You did super good tonight, Sam.”

I nodded, “Thanks, it wasn’t as bad as I expected.”

“I told you that you would be a natural at this.”

She began counting my money and taking out what I owed her, then putting out a separate stack of cash to the side, which I guessed to be my tips.

She grabbed it and handed it to me, smiling, “Five-hundred, not bad at all for a first night.”

My jaw must’ve been hanging open because Danna laughed at me. I took the money from her and smiled, “Damn, I can buy a lot of liquor with that.”

She frowned, “You should get a savings account and put that money in there, saving will help you in the long run Sam.”

I pocketed the five hundred-dollar bills and smiled, “Don’t worry Danna, I will.”

She nodded, “Good girl, see you Friday night?”

I smiled, “Of course.”

“Have a good rest of your night Sam.”

I turned, walking out from behind the bar and to Megan, “Let’s go you drunkard.”

She looked at me, “I am not a drunkard, Samanthaaa….”

I couldn’t help but laugh at her response as she followed me out the back of the bar. She wasn’t stumbling, she was just feeling really good, which I was okay with because she didn’t seem like she needed to throw up.

I led her to the back parking lot and unlocked my car, opening the door and waiting for her to get in. I looked up, seeing her just casually standing at the hood of my car, watching me.

I groaned, “Megan, get in.”

She just studied me, “Why…? I don’t wanna go homeee…”

I rolled my eyes, “Get your ass in the car Megan.”

She seemed to be resisting, which was a bit annoying and cute all in the same sense. I walked slowly up to her, wondering why she didn’t want to get in the car and go home. I knew she had to be tired, and she was pretty drunk too, but what was she afraid of.

She shook her head, “I didn’t mean to get this drunk.”

I smiled, “It’s okay, it’s not the first time I’ve seen you this way.”

She shoved me playfully, smiling, “That’s not a good thing.”

I grabbed her hand, “Come on, Megan.”

I felt her soft skin as she gripped my hand, but she still seemed to be refusing to follow me to the passenger seat. Luckily we were in a deserted parking lot where there was absolutely no one around but the two of us.

She smiled, “See it’s not fun when someone’s stubborn.”

I rolled my eyes, “Stop being stupid and get in the car.”

She walked closer to me, allowing me to smell her perfume that was now memorized because it was that intoxicating. She let her hand rest on my bare chest that wasn’t currently covered by my tank, and I felt my skin burn under her. My heart began hammering hard inside my chest as I looked at Megan, her blue eyes engulfing my every move.

I felt my face grow hot as she became closer and closer with every step she took towards me, and suddenly I understood that she wasn’t stopping herself. She was drunk, and her inhibitions were obviously really low, but I didn’t want to stop her.

Not anymore.

I whispered, knowing she could damn well hear me by how close she was, “You’re really drunk.”

She shook her head, “I’m not that drunk, Sam Carson.”

One hand rested behind my neck while the other hand that was resting on my chest traveled over my breasts and down my torso. A burning trail of fire made a path over my belly button and to the hem of my jeans, and her hand gripped them and tugged me into her.

I couldn’t take my eyes away from her now, and her dark hair cascaded over her slim shoulders, making her literally look like a model.

I shook my head, “You definitely wouldn’t be doing this if you were sober.”

She smirked, tangling her hand in my blonde hair and looking right into my eyes. It was scary how sexual she had become in the past few minutes, and I couldn’t deny the fact that I was majorly turned on. Megan and I had never been like this, even when we had come close to having sex. Sure, we had been in bed together for about three minutes, but this was much different.

She brought her pink lips closer to my ear, pulling me into her slightly as I felt my knees grow weak. She whispered, “Alcohol just gives me courage to do the stupid things I already want to do.”

So she wanted me, she had obviously just admitted that to me, but she was also really drunk. I knew the effects of alcohol, and I had experienced it first-hand, so not taking what she was saying right now literal was very difficult.

The drunken truth was always the real truth.

By this time her hand had managed to unbutton my jeans, and her hand was still wrapped in my hair as we stood close under the still night sky.

I felt her press me against the side of my car, eventually bringing her soft lips to mine and mouthing me as her hand attempted to slip farther into my pants.

At first I couldn’t believe something like this was happening. It was Megan Adams, my twenty-four year old History teacher that lived with me and my brother. Someone who I wasn’t sure I actually liked or hated, and she was trying to have sex with me in a secluded parking lot at two in the morning while drunk.

This was all kinds of fucked up.

But God she just felt so… good.

I allowed her to kiss me, but I refused her hand to get what it really wanted. I didn’t feel right out here doing that with Megan, just because it felt dirty and like a mistake. I knew she would regret remembering this in the morning, if she even remembered it, so preventing it from going too far was my job. If it would have been any other girl I would’ve opened up my backseat and got down to it, but not with Megan.

I just couldn’t, even though I extremely wanted her to fuck me right this instant.

She kissed my neck and eventually gave up trying to touch me, knowing that I wasn’t going to let her. She pulled out of the kiss and looked at me, “Isn’t this what you’ve been trying for? To finally get in my pants?”

I didn’t quite understand what she was talking about, but I refused to respond verbally. Did she think I was just trying to get her in bed? That I didn’t really care about her emotionally in any way possible? That obviously wasn’t the case, considering I refused her to touch the one place that had been begging to be touched by her. I just didn’t want it to be like this.

I just needed to get her home and to sleep.

This time it was my turn to take control, and even though I knew not to get too intense, I knew controlling her would be the only way to get her home.

I switched her position and pressed her against my car, holding her hips and kissing her like it was the last time I would ever kiss anything in my life. Everything about Megan drove me crazy, from the stupid fights to the things she knew about me, the sound of her voice and the way she walked. Everything about her made me weak, and kissing her was enough to just… cripple me.

I pulled away from her eventually, after what felt like several minutes of kissing her, “Megan, we need to go.”

She looked at me, nodding and already starting to sober up. I didn’t understand what had just happened between us, but the car ride home was awkward, and not the good kind of awkward. I knew this would cause a lot of shit between us, which I was already preparing myself for, but it had really managed to confuse me.

And when we got home she didn’t say one word to me and I did the same, and we ended up just calling it a night.

And for some reason I felt as if that would be the last time I would ever get the chance to be with Megan Adams.