"Mew Mew 2 is trash, but not you"
WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!?!
IM TRASH

Me, Blooky, Sans, Alphys & Chara: (wearing "Trash Club" T-shirts) =w=

Mettaton, Papyrus, Asriel, Frisk & Undyne: (just shake their heads)

Danggg Sans, stahp being a workaholic.

Damn Sans, workin' it....literally.

Sans: If I'm being honest, it's actually the opposite. The reason I have three jobs is because I'm trying to hold up my end of the bills. With so many people in one house, it takes a lot of money to avoid being evicted. Even before this whole thing started, me n' Papyrus were having some financial trouble. My sentry job covers most of it, since any position in the Royal Guard pays really well. But I need money to buy my share of groceries, too, along with a bit of cash to spend on myself and my friends. And I still haven't fully covered my tab to Grillbz, but surprisingly, he's pretty chillby about it.

Papyrus: (from the other room) SANS NO!

you're welcome now gimmie all your red bull or i'll throw them back and kill sans

Papyrus: (nyooms in, scoops up his brother) (demon voice like Chara) Fucking try me bitch.

Sans: (didn't hear the full question, chuckles a bit) And they call me the overprotective one.

I took german for 2 years and all I have to show for it is the phrase: das ist langweilig which just means this is boring -_-

Me: rest in peace us

THE BEAN SWEARED

Papyrus: I've been swearing for literally months now. I think I made Sans dead on the inside. Oops...

Sans: Nah bro, I was dead inside way before that.

Papyrus: Are you okay?

Sans: no

AS I READ THE SHIPS, I MADE A DOUBLE CHIN AND I COULDN'T BREATHE

Geez Tori, you ship...  a lot XD

Toriel: shiiiiiiiips

Asgore: tori calm down—

SHIIIP!!!!!!!!*dies of fangirling*

Me: great now I got another funeral to plan ;w;

Toriel! Language! There are children around!

Toriel: (goat mom has been done a confuse)

Sans: (chuckles) It's a joke, Tori.

SING. IT.

SING IT

*starts singing for him*

VIVA LAS VEGAS~!!

VIVAAAAAAAAAA-

VIIIIIVAAAAAAAAA, LAS VEGAS~!

Vegas: (sarcastic clapping) Great collaboration, guys, fuck you.

So...Dommy boi (Hehehehehehehehe)

*whispers really close to his non-existent ear* Dommy~

DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMM

so Dom...

Sans: (flushes blue) NO STOP

Can we dedicate this whole book just to these two cuddling and being happy?

Me: That's what my one-shot book and Hearts on Fire are for owo

Frisk: PLUG, PLUG, PLUG!

*picks Asriel up and runs* HAHAHHAHA MY GOAT CHILD *puts him back down because that's kidnap*

Chara: Don't kidnap mah brother! ;A;

Asriel: meep -v-

*ignores goat child and goes to pet asgore instead*
Goat dad, please adopt me

Asgore: (a little confused by the petting, but smiles at the asker) If you wish, young one. (ruffles their hair a bit)

Doggo: I smell someone being petted *suspicious look on his face*

Asriel: (pats Doggo's head) :>

*hugs* :3

Q-Q meeeeeeEEEEEEEEEEP--

Blooky: ^^

I AGREE. LETS GO MURDER SOME IDIOTS.

*has pitchfork in hand*

Flowey: YEET!!!!

AHHHHHHH

CAN YOU FEEL THE SHIP TONIGHT?~🎶

Grillby & Sans: (slight blush)

Come on Frisk, you gotta on pink wear Wednesdays!

Frisk: (confused-as-fuck noises)

YO GRILLBZ, YOUR DAUGHTER'S IN LOVE WITH OLIVIA! I vote we set them up on a blind date, who's with me?

Grillby: I second that idea!!

Sans: Same here!!

Papyrus: Yay! Let's set up Fuku with her crush! >w<

MTT: IS SOMEONE WEARING MY GLITZ AND GLAMOUR™ SUNGLASSES?

Flowey: (calls to him) Unfortunately, that would be me!

👏👏👏👏👏

Toriel: (smiles cutely)

Lol I've been doing that since the start

Papyrus & Fuku: (sharing ship pictures on their phones)

Frisk: For clarification, a long-running gag in this house is taking pictures of the couples and sending them to others like trading cards. Kitty's at the high score right now >w<

Chara: I WILL BEAT YOUR SCORE, SNOW!!

Me: Chara please. You can't defeat a girl with a folder to burn.

0_0You are wayyy better at art than me, Paps

Papyrus: Don't say that! I'm sure your art is wonderful! <3

YES, WELCOME TO THE SHIPPING COUNCIL. WE HAVE MEETINGS EVERY SHIP AND WE DON'T STOP SCREAMING OR SHIPPING. SEE YA IN THE NEXT MEETING.

Me: I AM A MEMBER OF THIS COUNCIL

Sans: in a way, we all are

*bows* :3

Alphys & Undyne: (clapping)

*lets go of bitch 6 (I'm still gonna use that name)* fine. WORLD YOU DON'T DECIDE WHEN SOMETHING HAPPENS!! I SAY 59 DAYS!!! ÒwÓ

Ambrosia: I don't think that's how it works--

*never ending stream of tears at that last one*

Asriel: Yeah... but hey! I'm alive and happy and with my family now. That's what counts...! ^^

*Throws a milk carton at him* PAPYRUS YOU MOTHERTRUCKER DRINK SOME MILK

*le slaps the milkshake out of your hand* Nu •^•

Papyrus: Well isn't that ironic ;w; (puts milk carton in the fridge, proceeds to clean up the spilled milkshake)

JUST DO IT!!!! MAKE YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE!We can dig you out of the friend zone if ever that happens

Fuku: Heh, thanks...

What if we give you coffee flavored milk?

Papyrus: Nice workaround, but no thanks... I need energy.

You see boys a dab is what happens when you need to sneeze while you're holding food.

Asgore & Grillby: (look at each other, confused)

Gaster: That's actually decently accurate.

Grillby... Asgore... Let me explain le dab. Dabbing is a move that you do that resembles that of sneezing and you only do this action when there is a hater on the loose, or when someone says that England is their city.
((Fucking kill me))

Me: OH MY GOD (cringe-laughing intensifies)

Asgore: ???????????????

Grillby: (raises his hand) Yeah I didn't catch any of that.

Gaster: Pay them no mind, gentlemen, they're just trying to embarrass us. (chuckles)

WAIT WHERE'D THE CASTLIST GO I CAN'T SEE IT LET'S ALL PANIC

Everyone: (SCREAM)

STAY GOLD, PONYBOY, STAY GOLD!
NOTHING GOLD CAN STAY.
I LIE TO MYSELF ALL THE TIME.
THINGS ARE ROUGH ALL OVER.
*falls down into a spazzing fanturtle mess*

Me: (fankitten screaming)

Papyrus: (puts hands over his nonexistent ears) JESUS

sidenote:
* drags Tori, Sans, Undyne, and Chara off to the side *
• make Papyrus sleep. literally, make him go to bed and then watch him sleep like a creepy stalker so you know he's getting them z's.
• make him stop going on patrols. srsly. he thinks he can manage all his things but he really can't.
• i think he's actually going to seriously injure the person who hit Sans with that rock. i am blanking on all details about them and it's seriously bugging me,, but please make sure he stays in line.
• UNDYNE PLEASE DON'T LET PAPS JOIN THE ROYAL GUARD. SERIOUSLY HE THINK HE CAN BALANCE EVERYTHING AND YOU'LL LET HIM IN IF HE CAN """PROVE HIMSELF""" BUT HE NEEDS TO TAKE A STEP BACK.
• i'm p sure y'all are the best suited for these duties bc mcfriggin honestly

Undyne: I don't have intentions of letting him in. I just don't trust that he'd be able to discard mercy on the fighting grounds. Innocent souls like him don't belong there — they'll get themselves killed in the first battle.

Chara: I'll take sleepwatch duty. He told me himself that despite our... ahem, history... he trusts me and feels safe around me. If I get caught, I'll tell him I was just checking on him. He knows I'm protective, so he'll understand.

* She looks down, remembering their history before they became friends.

Toriel: I will try to convince him to stop his patrols and to keep him in line in general. I know he cannot go into battle against a dangerous enemy, or he will get himself slaughtered... we will all try our best at our jobs, my child, but why tell just us this and not the others?

Sans: (exhale) Guys, there's something I never told you... about him...

Chara: What do you mean, comedian?

* Sans leads them to the Ruins for some privacy, and sits them all down.

Sans: From what he's told me and what I've gathered from spying on him, Papyrus wants to help break the barrier, but has a questionable method in mind. He's trying to make human-monster hybrid creatures, with souls and bodies strong like humans but the magical properties of a monster's genetic code. Thing is, fresh DT doesn't appear out of nowhere... so he had to extract it from Chara and Frisk.

Chara: (heart-shatter noise, pupils shrink) Papyrus did that?!

Sans: (nods) He's the reason you passed out. We were actually talking, after he admitted it to me. He felt like absolute shit, and thought you weren't going to wake up. You should have seen the relief on his face when he got told that you were awake. That extraction was also the reason that the Asker decked him in the face and nearly killed him. They were mad at him for hurting you and Frisk.

Toriel: ... (her expression is unreadable)

Undyne: I'm not buying this...

Sans: He also hasn't been sleeping, instead running on coffee, Red Bull, and plain activity adrenalin. I've seen him training a lot more lately whenever he isn't either answering asks or in the lab, whether against himself or one of the kiddos, like you, Chara. When I asked him why he's suddenly a training addict, these were his exact words. "I'm feeling more and more tired every day. I need to boost my energy, boost my heartbeat, in any way I can just to keep myself awake. If I pass out, I'll worry everyone, and if I sleep, I lose precious time."

Chara: (whispers to herself) Papyrus, no...

Sans: Like the asker said earlier, he also said he was going to try and take Undyne down in training as many times as possible, to convince her that he has a perfect balance of an ideal Royal Guardsman's traits.

Undyne: (sighs) I can't let him in... that's a suicide mission...

Sans: Either he doesn't understand that, or he does, but just refuses to accept it. He's put ten years of effort into getting into the Guard, and no matter how I try, I can't get him to give in.

Toriel: ... (has been quiet this whole time) ...my friend... what else has he done...?

Sans: ... (sigh) He's using the green soul as a power source for the machine he's repairing.

Undyne: WHAT?!

Chara: Papyrus stole a soul?!?! How?!?! Those things are under lock and key!!!

Sans: He's been picking locks since we were kids, and he can make people pass out with that dog whistle. That's how he got the asker to faint before, with us following shortly after. Don't underestimate the man.

Undyne: (stands up) Thanks for the info, Sans. I'm confronting him.

Sans: (panics) No, nonononono, that is a bad idea, I repeat, bad idea!!

Undyne: Bad ideas are all I have. (stomps off with a spear in hand)

Chara: ... (has fallen silent)

Toriel: ...my child... is this about Papyrus extracting your determination?

Chara: (slow nod)

Toriel: Chara, he still loves you. I know it. Do you remember how Sans said he felt when you fainted? He cares, Chara. He really does. There has to be some outside force making him do this. He cares too much about you to do that for no reason.

Chara: ...

* She hugs her mother tightly.

Chara: There has to be. I'm sure of it.

*drags everyone to the Ruins*
GO AND SEARCH EVERY NOOK AND CRANNY OF THIS PLACE

Undyne: (tugs herself free and bolts for Snowdin)

Papyrus: (nowhere to be found)

Alphys: W-what do we do?

Asgore: (leader mode engage) If the asker deems whatever's going on here important enough to bring all of us here, it must be important. Everyone stay in groups of at least three. Tori, Dr. Gaster, Dr. Alphys, you stay with me.

Tori: (stands by his side) Alright, Gorey. You lead the way.

Gaster: (awkward) I-I'm right behind you!

Grillby: Fuku, you're staying with me. Olivia, you too. Sans, since your brother is nowhere to be found, you stay with me too.

Sans: (clings to him) Okay, Grillbz...

Frisk: Me, Azzy and Chara will all stay together.

Flowey, MK (Monster Kid) & GK (Goner Kid): We're helping too! We'll stay with Frisk.

Muffet: I will stay with Mettaton, Napstablook and Temmie.

Me: (looking back and forth, trying to find a group to stay with) (decides on MTT's district) Let's go.

????? 10: (laying in a bed of yellow flowers, badly injured) ...how did I get down here...?