Dear Ella,

I have social anxiety disorder and find it hard to socialise with people. I thought it would be okay and that I'll still be able to live life, but it's at the point where I can't even ask for food from the lunch ladies. I always become a nervous wreck when talking to people that aren't family. I recently went to a restaurant and couldn't even order my food from how nervous I was. If you have any advice on helping me about this, please say it. I really need help.

I'd like to stress that I'm not a qualified doctor or psychologist in any way, and I would highly recommended talking to a doctor about medication for your social anxiety disorder. However, I can give some tips which helped a friend deal with something similar.

Don't suddenly force yourself to become an extrovert who talks to everyone because that just won't work, you need to take baby steps. Smile at someone while you're walking for a brief second, say hello to someone you vaguely know. Take a few deep breaths while you're waiting in line for your food and run over what you're going to order from the lunch ladies, and that way you'll feel more relaxed when ordering because you'll know what you're going to say.

Remember baby steps, try and talk to one more person each day even if it's just a 'thank you' if they hold open a door.