@PsycoViolinist asks:

If you adopted kids, who would be the mom figure and who would be the dad?

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Oh god. Karkat would be Mama Kat all the way.

WHAT?! WHY THE FUCK WOULD I BE THE FEMALE LUSUS?!

Because you've got those motherly instincts like Kanaya. Y'know. Brush your teeth. Eat your veggies. Shower after sex. All that lame shit.

FIRST OF ALL, I DON'T NEED TO BE COVERED IN MORE OF YOUR BODILY FLUIDS THAN IS REALLY NECESSARY. SECONDLY, THOSE ARE NORMAL THINGS THAT YOU SHOULD DO DAILY. IT'S SAD AND SOMEWHAT REPULSIVE THAT I HAVE TO TELL YOU TO DO ALL OF THOSE THINGS.

Snoooooooooooooooore. You're so the mom because you just nag all the time.

YOU ARE SUCH A DICK.

Also why I'm the dad.

FINE! IM THE MOM! SHUT UP ALREADY!

Hey. Hey. Karkles. Guess what.

... WHAT?

I love you.

... I LOVE YOU, TOO, STUPID.