NEVEN

Names unending. Julis. Kemal. Loto. Tyber. Hah... It salted his tongue with blood when he tried to breath through his lungs, full of ooze. Dampness sat upon his brow when he recited their names to himself — and the many who disappeared under his command. The rattled gurgle of an echo in his ears. Whispers sounded in turn, and he tore open his eyes to the blur. Sunlight shone through the windows, a haze settled over the droplets. As the bubbles escaped his throat, he tried to drag himself upwards, but found himself pushed back down into his pillow. "You're as stubborn as Yuven is," a familiar voice pointed out. A woman's. He drew his attention for the source, and he paused at Maria, who looked down at him with a frown. "Two expulsion flashes. How are you feeling?"

His gaze swept to the blood-spotted towels that sat in a container. "I'm fine." He sat up; this time with Maria's help as a hand on his back. Feet on the ground, he took a few moments to catch his lost breath as Maria handed him a steaming cup into his shaky hands. At a tap, he took a swig and tried not to cough at the bitter, stale taste. Tongue out to try and get rid of the taste, he asked, "What is this?"

Maria frowned deeper. "It's chocoberry tea."

Oh... Neven drank it all and ignored the rot on his tongue. As he brought the cup away from his lips, he sighed. I knew it was bad... but I never realised in what way. The door opening caught his attention when Yuven, Fenrer, and Adara slipped through. Smile put on his face, he perked up even as his adopted sons stared at him in concern and terror. "Any luck in your investigations?" Neven put the cup down on the table in front of him as Yuven made his way for him. "Once I'm feeling better, I'd like to be more involved." It scratched at his throat, a daring desire to scream, but he pushed forth to keep hope alive. I'll find you, Kem, wherever they took you, I know you're still alive. "After all, I'm not down and out quite yet and Kemal is my Oathbound. You're going to need me regardless." Frustration started to add more bubbles, but he refused to let them balloon.

Each one popped, one by one when Yuven hugged him. "I did not tell you what I did to try and undermine you," Yuven grumbled, his feathers rattling against his face. "Only the simple facts. People died under your command — I did not say any of it was your fault. You are unwell. Even moreso now. You're not Corrupted. It's not possible." His fingers dug into his arm, and he winced at the pressure set upon his shoulders, but he chewed on it too and readied himself to face the abyss. "We may have a lead, but do not get yourself excited until we know more. Just rest for now. It is the least you deserve. Rest and do as I say, or I will hold myself to my promise in throwing you on that boat." Hope dwindled in his throat when Yuven released him and turned to Fenrer, who raised his head. "Is there anything you can do?"

Neven opened his mouth, but Fenrer answered before he could state his desires. "Possibly, but it would involve piercing deeper into his mind — and that has its own risks," he commented. "I'd leave that up to Maria."

"I'll know more in the coming days on the situation, I'm monitoring him."

Neven gave up his words. You are all that stands between them and the abyss. Eyes narrowed, he chose to listen instead of argue with those set in their ways. In the blood-tainted mirror when he closed his eyes, the golden wyvern spotted with crimson leaned against the glass, huffing out plumes of mist. It caught in his own lungs, and he shook himself out. "I'm not Corrupted." Such an obvious statement, and it gave him no sense of serenity. "Kemal's out there somewhere. I know it."

"We agree," Yuven mumbled. "Question is what state he's in if this is how you are. Clearly, we are under yet another time constraint. I will be wasting no time, energy, or resources. We will find the missing Wardens, no matter the cost. We're going to find him — and we'll tear the cult into the light, root and stem."

You're all that stands... "Do remember to take care of yourselves, though." Another forced smile, but it tasted bitter on his lips. Rustic with the tea lodged in his throat and filling his lungs with dredge. Attention on Maria, he asked, "Is it alright if I take a walk?"

"I'll go with you," Fenrer spoke up.

"Ah." Neven raised his hands at the offer. "No, no. I need some time to think. I have a lot to consider, including—" He pointed at Maria's icy promise. "We have a wedding to look forward to!" It bubbled his chest when Yuven brought a hand to his face to brush his nose. "We have to take the little pieces of light we can get in these dark times." On his feet, he ignored the wobble in his knees, with Maria shaking her head. "I am so very happy for you two." You're getting the life you've always deserved... Neven patted Yuven's shoulder and headed for the door.

"Miesero... you shouldn't go out alone," Yuven warned.

"I've been surrounded by caretakers forever, it feels like," Neven drew past his fangs, trying not to bare them. "It doesn't really give me much room to breathe, yes? You have plenty of capable Storm Wardens at your disposal now that would be better served making your jobs easier and not babysitting me. Aine, for example, was a part of Kemal's team, and if anyone would have information, they would. Maybe insight into his orders." Because I am lacking such context... Bubbles of rage raised in the magma of darkness, but he shoved them down too.

"What if you have an expulsion flash?" Fenrer argued. "We don't know what's going on with that, Neven—"

It was Maria who spoke next before he could get a chance to counter him, "Let him go." A sigh left her lips, one of weariness, and he bit on his tongue, not wanting to make things difficult for anyone — no more than he had already with the death on his hands. "Neven, if you take more than ten minutes, I'm coming to check on you."

Excellent. Neven made good on his escape out of the treehouse. In a rush. In a cell. It burnt at his wrists, but he continued down the road even after hearing someone call out to his name. Each one burned on his tongue when he muttered it to himself, and counted down the numbers. "Let me pass," was all he gave to the Wardens at their posts by the gate which led to the sea. No matter how badly his lungs burned. No matter how much the rustic taste tore at his throat. Off the beaten path, he walked through the woods until his boots hit sand and he listened to the crash of the waves. Helpless, he bit on his tongue, imagining the sun setting upon Euros — on Sivaport. "Sea to sea," he mumbled the saying of the Hanekans. Eyes closed to the darkness, the starry sinew frayed and burned at the edges. Always home. Hold fast. He crept closer to the foam left on the thick sand, where bioluminescent algae glimmered when night fell.

"What is it going to take?" he asked the ocean.

They think I was just delirious, but I know you were close. I was missing for a couple days, but I refuse to believe that. Neven kicked a lone pebble, swallowed by the churning waves. Blood slipped over his tongue, but he stiffened at a familiar chuckle.

"You never did care about Derelicts nibbling on your ankles," Kemal's first chittered lecture rang through his ears when he looked in the direction of where it came from.

Nothing more than the breeze on the sand. Water lapped at his boots when he crept closer. The chill swept up his legs, eviscerating them with weakness. "It helped me think..." A lackluster response which made Kemal tsk and leave him to it.

Waves hit some of the rocks and scattered droplets across his face.

"Is it true Avaerilians are more attuned to soul magick?" Kayal asked, ever as curious as his Trainer. Two Kemal's. Or only ever been one. It left salt on his lips when the dampness fell downwards when Kemal tilted his head during long hours of study in the Warden Annex. "You've never seen the sun before?"

No. Not the sun. Not the clouds. No rain. No trees. Nothing at all. Waves pulled at his feet, beckoning him to seek out the truth Kemal hunted for without fail. I knew nothing. You, and all the rest, taught me how much I didn't know. His tunic fluttered with the wind while he stared down at the water. In the mirror, the blood-splattered gold feathers pressed against the slicked scales, and Neven pressed his hand against it, bumping his brow against it. How much I wasn't hearing. Fangs slipped out of the jaws of a beast. How much I'm still not hearing because you won't let me. His own teeth pinched his lips as the pressure grew in his throat. What toll must I pay to rectify my mistakes? When all I'm hearing is your names? You told me to relax, but proceed to do what I do. What am I supposed to make of that? He pressed his palm into his cheeks and pulled down the weakness into his throat. How many have died under my command?

A hiss left his nose as he found himself laughing even as the water thickened on his cheeks. Why did it have to be you? Why couldn't I have just...

Irimount's magnificent spires, which stood the test of so much time — taken down in a single night by a cult. Always a cult. All around him, the voices of those out of his reach echoed. Julis, always happy to share his experiences as an Aurus, all to make Fenrer's life easier. Always willing to do what it took — a dangerous road, but Julis never faltered and dove into Kayal's mind at a fleeting hope with reality's cruelty dogging his heels. "I'll keep trying," he said, in the distance to the right, though right at his feet while Kayal died a second time. "If I can't, maybe Fenrer can."

Neven tried to get away from what reality became in the end.

"It's not your fault, Nev," Kemal tried to tell him on repeat. "We know what we signed up for."

The hiss sharpened as he tried to catch his breath. Pressure rose in his lungs, into his throat, choking his heart. Even as his entire body numbed, his chest expanded and the hiss in his ears quieted.

Thirty. He said every name, the temptation to sink against the pillar and let apathy take him once more growing stronger. How many, Kemal? Why did you have to join them? I was fine. I was fine! I was recovered, and fine and— As the voices coalesced though with no Obscura Text in sight, he slapped his hands against his temples when each one molded and turned into the screams of the dead. Too much. Too fast. It swelled his head, and he found himself joining in the chorus too, with no one to hear him except the ocean — Kemal's ancestral home. Sea to sea. Always home.

Sea to sea.

Neven screeched their lost pain and the mirror cracked when the wyvern on the other side echoed it out. Knees wet, the waves lapping at his tight chest, he drove talons into his skin to feel something else. It lodged into his throat and silenced him in turn, but he heard a different voice behind him.

"Miesero?"

In the snowy fields of tundra, Yuven stood there, nothing more than a seven turns old child again, staring at him in terror and disbelief. No. No! Neven shook out his head though the mirage refused to leave him alone when Fenrer crept up to join him out of a veil of fire. I'm all that stands. I'm all that's left! Both of the children remained cold, frozen, staring in torment and concern. Auric flames danced around him when he sobbed at the continuous, dissonant chords. It burnt away every mirage, but as he went to wipe at his wet eyes, he froze at hands on his shoulders. An older Fenrer, and nothing more than a mind's emptiness. Another blink, and there was Yuven on the shore, just as confused and lost as he was at seven. It thickened in muck, and Fenrer snapped his fingers at him, catching his attention, leaving nothing else except his back to the mirror.

"We only want to help you," Fenrer said. "I only want to help you."

"But that's not your job," he said to the visage.

"I know what I signed up for," Fenrer said, strong and stalwart like a giant. Neven shrunk when he brought a hand up, and the darkness turned red. "You are not carrying this much out of a sense of duty. You're doing it for self-flagellation. I'm not going to let you do that to yourself — you didn't let me do it. I'm not going to let you lose the faith you have like I did." Another soft snap of his fingers, and Neven snapped around when the mud showed its bloody veins. Flames picked up. Opalescent.

"What are you doing?"

"Burning it away," Fenrer said.

It tore into his mind, a sharp pain, but ended as fast as the next wave when it pulled back. Reality returned, Fenrer let him go and it left nothing more but the sound of crashing foam against sand, not deep in the bowels of the ocean, but in front of Yuven and Fenrer. "You followed me," he muttered.

"It's been hours," Yuven said with an empty tone when he pointed behind him.

Neven looked over his shoulder.

Over the horizon, the sun crept towards it and shed the blanket of colorful evenfall. As wondrous as when he first spotted the swirls of light and the sprinkles of stars. "Oh." Neven turned to them, unable to stop the shaking. "I guess I lost track of time," he forced through his fangs and a choke. "I've been... doing that a lot lately, Kemal was so much better with time than I..." Neven lost the words, and drowned in his own tears instead.