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Chapter 43 – The Worst

“Y-you live here… alone?” I croaked as I gazed at Winfred from across the table of his study room after several minutes of awkward silence.

This wasn’t what I had expected at all. In some other parallel universe, you’d probably imagine me and my long lost father running to each other with tears of joy, maybe in slow motion with a touching background music. Well, not in this universe.

He nodded with a sad little smile and hoisted himself on his seat.

“Err…” I started again.

“You’re probably wondering why.” He said resting his chin on the back of his hand.

“Why what?”

“Why— why I left you… and your mother.”

I just shrugged. It wasn’t like it mattered. It wasn’t like I could care anymore. That was so long ago I couldn’t even remember everything. At least that was what I wanted to think.

Winfred cleared his throat and dropped his gaze. It took him about half a minute to meet my eyes and perhaps organize his thoughts.

“Your mom—Emma was just sixteen when we had you. She was in high school back then. I worked part time as a music teacher. It wasn’t easy because she was a minor. Her parents were furious but Emma was… determined to keep you. I remember that one late afternoon. We were having one of those early evening walks when she smiled at me and said, we’re having a baby. She was very happy and I could just see it in her eyes.” A smile trailed on his lips, his eyes wistful.

“When you were born, Sarah, it was the happiest day of my life. You were the most beautiful baby I’ve ever seen.”

“Then why did you leave?” I asked.

“Your mom and I, we have our differences. Emma has her pride and I have my dreams. She knows I’ve always wanted to try my luck in music. It has always been a passion but I couldn’t bear leaving you.”

“But you still did.” I muttered bitterly.

There was a troubled look on Winfred’s eyes when he nodded.

“Yes. Things got too complicated and it came to the point that we couldn’t help but fight. Sarah, I can’t blame you if you won’t believe me, but I love you. There was never a day that I’ve regretted not having to see you grow up. You’re important to me. You and Emma; you’re both very important to—”

“But your music is way more important. I—I get it.” I nodded with a faint smile and swallowed the lump in my throat as I stood up. “I… need to think.”

With that, I darted out of the room deliberately disregarding Winfred’s efforts to call me back. He started after me then slumped on a chair.

I couldn’t bear talking about things that brought suffering to me in the past. Those memories I buried deep inside of me which I hoped would never resurface.

I was startled to see Becky waiting for me outside Winfred’s study with her back on the wall, her eyes looking all worried and teary.

“Sarah, are you okay?” she asked making an effort to hold my arm.

I smirked bitterly at her and shrugged.

“What kind of question is that?” I scoffed as I headed for the stairs. With all that just happened, I didn’t have the energy to make everyone else feel better.

“Sarah! I… I don’t think you should go d-downstairs just yet.” Her voice shook a bit as she tugged firmly on my arm.

With a deep sigh, I shook my head in frustration. “What do you want from me, Becky? What more could you possibly want from me? Huh?” I snapped.

Becky just dropped her misty gaze and kept on holding my arm. “Just a little while… stay with me, please?”

“You know what? I don’t really need this right now.” I shook her clutch off of me and trudged downstairs fumbling with my cell phone. I was about to dial Mom’s number when I heard hushed voices from the front porch.

“I knew this would happen.” Gerald muttered under his breath with a hint of belligerence. “I shouldn’t have let you make out with that little—“

“Shut up!” It was Leon’s voice. Since the incident with Larkin Frost (the weird pervert who tried to assault me) I never heard him more infuriated.

Discreetly, I stepped closer to the front door, my back against the wall. I took a little peek through the gap between the tapestries covering the window. Leon had Gerald thrust against the wall with a dull thud. The lanky talent manager could just gasp with the start as Leon grabbed him on the collars of his suit.

“Don’t you dare call her that or…” He gritted through his teeth, his shoulders shaking with rage. “I swear I’ll—“

“Len, that’s enough!” Arthur grabbed his son’s shoulders and pried him away from Gerald who clutched on his chest once released.

Gerald chuckled dryly despite the look of exhaustion on his face. He gasped for air again then leaned on the railing for support.

“I didn’t think you were that naïve Leon. I told you to keep that girl close, make her think you like her so we could manipulate her actions. To make sure she won’t run around revealing your true identity. Not so that you could have your priorities and your head all messed up to the point of ruining your—“

“Stuff it! Before I shut for you!” Leon growled, thrashing violently against Arthur’s grip.

Funny thing in life was, just when you thought it couldn’t get any worse, the universe would do a three-sixty degree flip just to prove you wrong. So that was why Becky didn’t want me to go down. Why was everyone contemplating against me under my nose?

I stifled a sob as a twinge of pain shot through my chest. Like I was being stabbed on the back over and over again. Mist started to form around my eyes but I tried hard to blink them back.

“Now everything will be ruined.” Gerald muttered with distaste. “Eight years, Leon. Eight years of hard work! Your career will end up just like that.”

I backed away from the door, unable to endure hearing more. So it was all a lie. I knew it. It was pretty suspicious that he suddenly talked to me after nearly a month of pretending invisible back then. Not to mention, him moving in the same neighborhood.

“Sarah?” It was Becky who caught me before I tripped on my own shoes and almost toppled a small crystal figurine sitting on the side table. Becky’s eyes widened when she saw me crying. “You… heard.” She mumbled with a vacuous gaze.

After regaining my balance, I backed away from her only to see Leon in front of me. His blue eyes were wide, worried—scared. His face was pale and panic-stricken as though he had just went through hell and back.

“S-sarah?” He said hesitantly as his hand reached out for mine. “I… I can explain.”

With a bitter smile, I stared blankly at his hand then to his perfect face. “Explain what? It’s okay.” I nodded. “I know now.”

With a remorseful sigh, Leon took a cautious step closer to me. “Let’s talk, Sarah.” He opened his mouth, hesitated then shook his head in frustration.

“There’s nothing more to talk about.” I croaked as I shoved his hand away and rushed to the front yard.

My steps were hurried and unsure. All I wanted was to be alone; to get far away from them as possible. Those people who I loved the most in this world were the ones who betrayed me.

“Sarah! Wait!” Leon called as he ran after me.

“Leave me alone!” I choked out running as fast as my feet could carry me. I didn’t bother to glance back if he was trailing on me. Soon I was running aimlessly to the street dialing for my mom’s number.

After two rings, Emma answered.

“Mom?” I croaked trying to swallow the swollen lump in my throat.

“Sarah, are you okay? Are you crying?” She asked worriedly.

I bit my lip. “N-no… Mom. I just… want to go home. Now.”

“Is something wrong? Tell me. Is Arthur there? Let me talk to him.”

A suppressed sob left my lips. I wanted to tell her that I found Dad. There was too much to tell yet I couldn’t say anything.

“Sarah? Sarah!”

I hung up and continued walking, confused. Thoughts whirred inside my head I couldn’t think straight. I was just an ordinary nerd. I should be worrying about Geometry and P.E. right now. Not some crazy messed up life like the one such as this.

A hand grabbed me on the shoulder. Thinking it was Leon, I writhed away from his hold and backed away. “I said leave me alone, Leon!”

My eyes widened. It wasn’t him but his tall body guard Joe. He raised his hands up as if to tell that he meant no harm.

“You wanted to go somewhere? I could drive you there.” He said with a deep cool voice like a radio announcer’s. It was the first time he actually spoke and in any other time, I could have laughed hard that his words rhymed.

With one look around, I immediately realized that I had no idea where I was headed to. Winfred’s house wasn’t too far but the thought of going back left the taste of bile in my mouth. I nodded wiping the tears on my cheeks with the back of my hand.

“Let’s go back to Leon’s house then to the airport.” I mumbled vacantly.

Joe tilted his head to where the car was parked not too far away and motioned for me to come with him.

“Going home early, are we?” Joe said as he led me into the car.

I thought I liked him better when he didn’t speak at all. And though I wasn’t in the mood for small talk, I nodded politely. “Yes.”

When I was settled in the back seat, Joe started the engine. He looked at his wrist watch as though he was waiting for someone.

“Can we go now?” I asked urgently upon seeing Leon heading to our direction.

“Oh, sure. Now we can go.” He smiled at me from the rearview mirror.

Before I knew it, two men got into the car. One got in the front seat and the other, the bulky one into the backseat. The one in front was wearing a baseball cap so I couldn’t see his face. The one who sat right beside me was quite burly, with slick black hair. He wore a pair of thick black rimmed glasses that made his eyes look funny and a worn out gray suit with pants that was too short from his ankles.

“Who—“ I demanded but before I could say more, the biker dude pressed a handkerchief on my mouth. It smelled a little like cough drops but singed my sinuses. When I tried to scream, it just left a funny bitter taste in my mouth.

“Let me go!” My screams were muffled by the handkerchief. I lashed my arms and legs to writhe out of the man’s clutch but he was too strong. Chloroform. It was too late when I realized that freaking out, but mostly breathing would not be the best idea.

Soon, my whole body turned limp, my eyelids fluttering feverishly before everything went black.

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*sigh* had a really hard time trying to write this week. Turns out, writer's block isn't a myth after all. So I hope you're still reading this and if you do, thanks a million. You don't know how your support keeps me going on :) PS do vote if you like it, neh?

xoxo ~shim