✩ ━━━ chapter four, may castellan. ❝I'm tainting our memories that were beautiful, I haven't imagined a life without you yet❞

SHADOW TRAVEL IS EXHILARATING. Percy's heart was beating fast like that time his mom Sally took him to Six Flags, and he rode Kingda Ka for the first time. He looked around when in a blink of an eye, the darkness melted into a cliff in the woods. Connecticut, maybe. It was a two-story white Colonial home, with rusty old swing set stood under an apple tree and a proper yard.

Percy held onto Nico's t-shirt when he stumbled. "I'm okay," Nico mumbled, rubbing his eyes.

"How did you do that?" Percy asked Nico.

"Practice." Nico huffed out. "A few times running into walls. A few accidental trips to China. The first time I shadow traveled, I passed out for a week. Now it just makes me a little drowsy, but I can't do it more than once or twice a night."

Percy felt a twitch at the thought of Nico passing out for a whole week. He wanted to say something—anything at all—but he didn't know Nico that well. He knew the son of Hades the way someone knows their classmates. Percy isn't friends with Nico, but he still cared for him; just like how he cared for the rest of the half-bloods, even if Percy wasn't sure what to think of the Camp at the moment. Annabeth behaving the way she is, the cabins arguing over pity matters, one with a broken heart and Percy trying to keep it together as well.

Then, for a brief moment, it smelled like cookies.

Percy tensed.

"Does it smell like... cookies to you?" Nico slurred, eyes beginning to droop. Percy grabbed the son of Hades by the back of his jacket, keeping him upright as he started to snooze off.

"Nico, wake up! Nico!" Percy shook him, scanning his surroundings. It was Micah—Percy knew it, and he had never felt so terrified before; he struggled to keep his eyes open, shaking his head desperately through the grogginess entering his mind.

He felt so, so tired.

Maybe a little nap wouldn't be too bad.

Nico let out a snore. His body slacked, and his head dropped back against Percy's shoulder, mouth wide open. Percy almost stumbled backward at the sudden weight, but a pair of arms caught him.

"How cute," Micah cooed in his ear, chuckling. Percy groaned a little, the smell of his mother's blue chocolate hip cookies driving him insane with the need to curl underneath a warm blanket and sleep.

"Two sons of the Big Three, exhausted because of me." Micah sounded very pleased with the situation. His wings fluttered with pride. "Never underestimate the son of a minor god."

"Micah..." Percy groaned, consciousness ebbing away. The son of Hypnos hummed with content as he sat Percy on the ground outside of Luke Castellan's childhood home, the sleek feathers of his wings reflecting the sunlight beautifully in a way Percy's sleep-numbed mind didn't need at the moment.

"Percy," Micah patted his check like he would with a dog. "Behave, and for your own sake, do not try to stab me with your pen. We have things to talk about."

He picked up Nico with one arm around his back and the other arm around the bend in his knees. Wind chimes from the front porch were churning. "Still with me, Jackson?" He asked with a devilish tilt to his lips, a smile so sharp it shouldn't even be considered one.

Percy blamed Micah's powers on him for his reply, but he was a little too gone to care truly—a bit too tired and afraid to die at sixteen, trying to save the world for ungrateful demigods and greedy gods. A little faded and in love, Percy slurred out; "Always—always with you. Gods, 'm so tired..."

The son of Hypnos laughed amiably like his words were just a dismissive joke and not Percy's cause of sadness. "Don't worry, Percy," Micah said calmly. "You won't be fighting for much longer."

Nico snored loudly, and well, Percy was a little desperate for peace and desperately in love with a traitor. He let go of all resolve and allowed his body to relax. Through half-opened eyes, he saw all the stuffed toys lining the sidewalk—lions, dragons, hydras, even a replica of the Minotaur.

"Starting to notice something?" Micah asked him, but Percy just groaned tiredly.

"Just wait... 'M gonna kill you," Percy muttered tiredly, immediately slumping against the son of Hypnos, the soft feather of his wings caressing his face.

"And here I was, bewitched with the idea of spending eternity with you ." His voice was mocking. "It is a very admirable goal, Percy. I'll warn you, though—many have tried to kill me before and yet, I'm here." Micah smiled politely, shifting his grip on Nico's body. Unbothered, he knocked on the front door — it was a turquoise color, with Castellan written in white paint.

The door swung open. "Luke!" An old lady cried happily, and when Micah spoke again, it wasn't his voice anymore. It was Luke's. Percy tried to keep conscious as Micah manipulate his vocal cords to mimic Luke's. The same pitch, the same tone of voice.

Ever since Luke left him for dead, the thought of his blonde hero left him filled with anxiety.

Nico snored, drooling on Micah's shirt. "Per favore, solo altri 5 minuti..."

Micah's eye twitched. "Hi, mom!" He greeted the old lady with Luke's stolen voice; Percy's heart constricted at how easily Luke's mother believed it, but then again, she looked like someone who enjoyed sticking her fingers in electrical sockets.

"Oh, Luke!" The lady nearly shouted with pure glee. She hugged Micah tightly, seemly unaware of the folded wings sprouting from his mid-back, Nico's snoring form in his arms or Percy hanging off him half asleep. "I didn't think you would be back so soon!"

Luke's mom laughed happily. Micah walked inside, rushing through the weird-looking living room, turning on candle after candle as he dropped Nico on the couch. The son of Hypnos looked down at Percy for a second; "Stay awake." He instructed quietly, vocal cords shifting back to his own, the grip on the back of his neck unrelenting.

For a second, Percy felt the strange need to bite him (or maybe kiss him.) Micah realized it, raising an eyebrow; "Behave, Perce." He warned again.

The son of Poseidon looked at Luke's mom instead. She smelled like burnt bread, unhealthy thin and her eyes seemed cloudy, like Toph from that show Percy used to watch as a kid. Maybe she is blind, too. As they got ushered to the kitchen, Percy saw a little bronze Hermes flew around the second hand of a ticking clock above the mantel.

"You did, you did! I knew it!" Luke's mom smiled cheerfully. "My dear boy, I have your lunch ready!" She began humming as she started making more sandwiches, unaware of the burning cookies in the oven. Above the sink, taped all around the window, were dozens of little pictures cut from magazines and newspaper ads—pictures of Hermes. She smiled lovingly at them. "Oh, I told them you would come back, Luke."

Micah's face was stiff, but his words flow smoothly. "How could I ever abandon my mom?" He sat on the dust-covered table, glancing at the chair distastefully, wings unfurling tentatively as if afraid to get dirty.

Percy felt nauseous, tricking someone who isn't sane like this, but Micah just looked at him with a hard expression. The madness of Luke's mother, Hermes' abandonment, the hundreds of Tupperware boxes with moldy peanut butter and jelly sandwiches inside—it's what he wanted to show Percy.

"You were too young when you left! Third grade! That's too young to run away! You naughty boy, you said you'd be back for lunch. And I waited..." She patted Micah's cheek affectionately. The longer she talked, the murkier her eyes grew.

Then she looked at Percy, beaming. "Why, Luke, there you are! You look so handsome. You have your father's eyes."

Micah didn't seem unbothered by her behavior; Percy felt like he could barely breathe. "Mom, can I get another cup of Kool-Aid?" He asked, morphing his voice into Luke's voice. Mrs. Castellan nodded, frantically searching for another glass cup.

"Tell me what you've noticed." Micah inquired, inspecting the plate in front of him as if he had never seen a peanut butter sandwich before.

"She's insane." Percy glanced towards Luke's mom, who was talking to a picture of Hermes taped above the sink.

Micah raised an eyebrow. "And?"

Percy licked his lips nervously, still feeling foggy. "She's a clear-sighted mortal." The son of Hypnos tilted his head. "There's a lot of uh, clues around. Toys of hydras, the cutouts of Hermes."

Micah looked a little disappointing but nodded. "She thought it was her destiny to become the next Oracle."

Percy looked down, trying to convince himself that Micah's approval didn't mean anything anymore. "And it wasn't?" He guessed, shifting in his seat.

Micah thanked Luke's mother as she set a cup of Kool-Aid in front of him. "And it wasn't." He agreed. "She went insane. Hermes left, and Luke was alone. Father of the year, wouldn't you agree, Percy?" Micah chuckled bitterly, the feathers of his wings swaying softly with the movement of his laugh. "Your mother would agree. After all, Sally married an abusive pest because Poseidon couldn't even bother to protect you."

Percy bit the inside of his mouth. "Hermes blessed her—this house is a sanctuary," Micah spoke lightly, uncaring how deeply his words hurt. "No monsters will ever near this place. Ever wonder why Poseidon couldn't do the same for your mom?"

Percy turned towards Ms. Castellan, refusing to meet Micah's champagne eyes; Ms. Castellan was frowning, her knife hovering over the sandwich bread. "Dear me, it didn't work out, did it? Your father warned me not to try. He said it was too dangerous. But I had to," She turned to Micah. "It was my destiny! And now... I still can't get the images out of my head. They make everything seem so fuzzy. Would you like some cookies?"

"No thank you, mom," Micah replied. She hummed happily. "I'm so happy you're here, my dear boy! How was the river?"

"The river?" Percy looked at Micah.

Ms. Castellan frowned as if trying to remember. "My—my blessing. For the river! Isn't that sweet?" She looked at Percy uncertainly. "Luke was going to a river, and he said he needed my blessing. I gave it to him. Of course, I did!"

So, Nico was right; Luke bathed in the Styx. Luke was invincible. Percy chilled as reality sunk in,

Micah's empty eyes look at him. "Still believe you stand a chance against us?"

Percy didn't reply. He never felt so hopeless before.

"Luke is so kind!" Ms. Castellan murmured, placing a hand on Micah's head affectionately. She moved, picking up a little stuffed Medusa from the windowsill. "Isn't he Mrs. Medusa? So kind and so handsome." She beamed at him. "I'm so glad you came home. I knew you weren't ashamed of me!"

For a second, it looked like Micah stopped breathing. Percy's throat tightened. "Of course not, mom." Micah looked at Percy with burning eyes, the hatred he held for the gods all-consuming as they faced Luke's mom. "I love you, always. How about you go upstairs and take a nap? I'll clean everything."

Micah snapped his fingers, and Luke's mom suddenly looked exhausted, barely keeping her eyes open. "Oh dear, I'm going to take a nap. Love you, Luke!" She kisses Micah's forehead, then Percy's, and moved with uneven steps.

Watching her go, Percy could imagine Luke, maybe nine or eight years old, watching as his mother crumble every single second, chasing a fantasy while dust accumulated on every surface and mold growing in the fridge, becoming older and hungrier, doubting every single word from his mother because she isn't there─She just isn't.

Growing up without a father, with a shattered mother.  Just alone until the next god shows up, bored and mistaking a living person for a toy to play with until they left and the cycle continued.

Micah half-smiled. They don't care, he mouthed, to him tilting his head towards the sky.

Percy frowned, feeling a little sick. "You're a piece of sh—"

"Ah, as much I love your dirty mouth, Nico is awake." Micah interrupted, shifting his eyes behind him. "Welcome back to the land of the awake! Did you like the little dream I conjured of your mother? Don't thank me, Nico, I have a soft spot for orphans."

The son of Hades was scratching his head near the doorway, red imprints from the cushion on his forehead and cheek. Nico smacks his lips sleepily. "Wh-what..?"

Micah checked his watch. It was the same gold as Kronos' eyes. The color felt like a blow. "I'm behind schedule," Micah sighed, stretching his wings like he was about to take off. "Our next meeting isn't scheduled until the war. So, best of wishes to the two of you. Let's stay alive, yes?"

"Running late to your next baby-stabbing appointment?" Percy said bitterly. "Or are you feeding moldy bread to the ducks in Central Park today?"

"Don't be silly, Percy." Micah chastised, but his face darkened in a way it made Percy shivered with fear. "As evil as I am, I do not need to ruin an animal's life─I have you and the rest of Olympus to torment." He smirked, then. "Or perhaps, you'll join me, Percy. Hopefully the little chat with Ms. Castellan changed your mind."

Micah laughed, but it was a little hollow. "To live long and unfulfilled, or to die in glory and honor. Welcome to war. May the Fates spare you, Percy Jackson, because next time, I won't."

With a rustle of wings, he was gone.

"Was that—" Nico began, still half-asleep. Percy gritted his teeth. "Yes."

Nico's eyes widen. "Why didn't you try to, I don't know, Percy, kill him?"

Percy covered his eyes, groaning. "I don't know."

"Are you okay?" Nico asked with hesitation after a couple of minutes of silence.

Percy couldn't reply, rubbing at his eyes until his eyelashes are clumped together with tears and it hurts, surrounding all blotchy and red. "I don't know," Percy admitted, the green of his irises accentuated by the pink irritation. "But I have to be."

"Percy, it's..." Nico didn't look like he knew what he was saying, mouth hanging open. The kid stopped trying, staring at him unsurely.

Percy repeated himself. "I will be." He repeated. "I'll be fine."

"Maybe..." Nico nodded. "But it's okay, y'know... if you still love him. But—but remember where your loyalty is."

'Love him' made it sound good like Percy isn't alone with the weight of the world on his shoulders. With a tight smile and the need to see his mother, Percy walked out of Luke Castellan's nightmare.

"I know, Nico." He said, not fully believing his own words. "I know."

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄 ! ! !

*sweating* micah is very sexy

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