Song for the chapter: i love you, by Billie Eilish

"Maddison."

The way my name rolled off Ryker's tongue sounded so slick, so smooth. It just sounded right coming out of his mouth.

His hair was messy and wavy, his outfit casual and dark. But his eyes held so much pain that it weighed on my own heart. And for a split second, I forgot almost everything from last night, as well as currently.

"Ms. James?"

My attention turns to the lady behind me. My eyes widen before I turn to Ryker. He's already trying to push his way in, be nosy and see who's in here.

"Just a se—"

Too late.

Ryker was way taller, able to easily poke his head in and see someone on the couch. Tamika smiles at him.

"Is this a friend of yours, Maddi?"

I groan. "Kind of."

I glare at Ryker and let him in. He shoves his hands in his pockets as he looks at me like I just said the world's most offensive thing to him.

"Well, come on in. We're almost done here."

I stroll over to the couch where I was previously sitting, Ryker walking cautiously before standing close beside me.

"Mrs. Takoma, this is Ryker. Ryker, this is Tamika Takoma."

Tamika extends her long hand out towards him. "It's a pleasure to meet you. Maddi was telling me quite a bit about you."

His eyes flicker towards me. "Nice to meet you."

"Maddi," Tamika sighs. "As you know, this process isn't gonna be easy. It's going to be long, it's going to be hard, and it's going to be stressful. But that's why I'm here, you hear me?"

I smile at her. "Yeah. I figured as much."

"I'm here to fight for you, and for your sister. And I'm damn good at my job."

I chuckle, cause I really needed the laugh. "I know. I've been researching you a lot."

"I take that as a compliment." She winks. "But I'll text you my email, okay? You send me over all of what you have, and I'll get this appeal to the court for a court date."

I nod. "Okay."

"But based off what you told me," she looks at me carefully. "The stepmom isn't gonna like that much."

I shake my head. "I don't care. I'm ready."

She smiles. "I like you. You're a real fighter. I got that from the moment I picked up the phone."

I blush. "Thanks, I guess."

Tamika rises, grabbing her purse. "I'll be looking forward to your email."

"I'll get right on it."

She looks at Ryker. "Don't you let go of this one. She's a keeper."

My eyes widen as I hear Ryker's deep chuckle. "I don't plan on it."

"Good. We'll talk soon, Maddi."

I walk her out, bidding her a final goodbye. After I close the door, I feel so much better. Like all the anxiety left with her.

What snapped me out of it was when I felt warm arms wrap around my body. Ryker was carrying me, bridal style, towards my room.

"What are you doing?" I gape.

He doesn't say anything, just keeps walking. I narrow my eyes at him as he sets me down on the edge of my bed, wrapping his arms around me. He's between my legs, making me so confused as he practically squeezes me close to his body.

"I'm so fucking sorry, Maddison."

I look at him, pushing my hand through his hair. "Ryker, it's okay."

"No it's not." He looks up at me. "I'm fucked up, and all I know how to do is fuck up everything good in my life."

I grab either side of his face. "Don't say that."

"I do. Look at what I did to you." He frowns, putting his head on my chest.

I look up, shaking my head. "Ryker, you had a bad day." I grab his face again, making him look at me. "You're not perfect. So? It's okay."

He gently gripped my neck. "Why are you so fucking good to me?"

I smile gently before I press my lips to his. "I love you, Ryker. For all your mistakes and all."

"You still love me? After that shit show last night?"

I nod. "Of course I do."

"You're a fucking angel on earth." He whispered so softly, it was like he didn't mean to say it aloud.

He climbs on the bed grabbing my waist and turning me to face him, my nose pressing against his chin. I had a small smile on my face as he traced small circles on the small patch of exposed skin from where my shirt rode up.

"So a lawyer makes house calls?" He looks at me.

"I actually called to make an appointment. She wasn't even supposed to be in, but she left some paperwork. I called, her secretary wasn't at her desk and she was passing by the phone," I smile. "She answered and she started asking me basic questions. She said she was immediately drawn to my case and wanted to meet me right away. So she came over."

"Twist of fate, huh?"

"I guess so." I smile.

"Crazy how that works." His hand slides up, making my breathing hitch.

"I-uh, yeah."

His warm touch spreads goosebumps across my skin as he pushes up higher, his thumb reaching the bottom of my bra.

"Wait," I blink, looking at him.

"What's wrong?" He looks at me.

"That's what I'm trying to ask you," I breathe in, not focusing on the fact that he won't move his hand. "You seemed really sad when you got here."

His eyes dropped.

"Just family shit. It's nothing, don't worry. I handled it."

When he tried to distract me with moving his hand, I grabbed it with my free hand. He looked back up at my eyes.

"It's not nothing, Ryker. And doing...this isn't going to get you off the hook, either. So until you tell me," I shrug and turn my back towards him.

"Wait, wait." He calls, pulling my waist back towards him.

I twist in his arms, seeing his frown. I grab his chin and kiss his lips. He looks at me with such a raw, intense pain that it just hurts to see. I wanna know who freaking hurt him so much so that I can physically hurt them.

"Kyler was at my place when I woke up. Curtesy of you, I hear."

I blush. "Well, yeah. I, uh, thought you'd need to talk."

"We did." He presses his forehead on mine. "And he told me some stuff I never expected to hear about my mom."

"Like what?"

He huffs. "Like she's the one who cheated on my dad."

I felt my face fall. "What? Is it true?" When he nods, I let out a defeated breath. "I-I'm so sorry, Ryker. I know how much she means to you."

"She fucking lied to me, Maddison. My whole life. She made me believe my dad was some kind of heartless monster who never cared for my dreams when it was her who never believed that I can make it."

"Oh shit." I mutter.

"Yeah."

"And Kyler knew?"

"He said that dad and mom made some kinda pact that he wasn't allowed to tell me. Dad apparently loves mom so much to let me believe he's the monster he never even was."

"Hey," I coo, rubbing his back. "You didn't know."

"Am I so fucking weak and naive that nobody can trust me? That nobody can believe in me enough to do anything?"

My brows knit together angrily.

"No, Ryker. Look at me." His eyes, slowly, look at mine. "You're not weak, Ryker. You're far from it. You have such a beautiful heart. You feel so deep, I can see it in the way you write your poems, in the way you talk, the way you look at me." I shake my head. "You love fiercely and you're loyal to a fault. And you know what? Your mother took advantage of that. Everyone in your life has seemed to take advantage of your humble, pure heart, Ryker."

I push my hands through his hair and kiss his forehead.

"But still, you're not weak. You've developed this tough exterior to make it seem like you don't care, but you do. Even to the people you act like you don't like, you care so much for. You only want the best for them, and you want to fix your relationship with them."

His thumb traces my lower lip, but I smile anyway.

"You're hurt now, Ryker. And that's okay. But this is only gonna make you stronger. You're not weak. You saw the broken mess in me and still decided it was beautiful. You can do anything you want; I know, and feel deep down, that you're going to do excel in your writing career. Because you feel things on such a deep level." I smile. "You don't think so, but I know. And when you're signing copies in a few years from now, I'm gonna smile and tell you I told you so."

Ryker's eyes shine up at me. "Did you just secretly admit that you see a future with me?"

My jaw drops slightly as my cheeks heat up, especially as I remember his drunken words from last night.

I wanna marry you, Maddison.

"I mean, I guess we both knew we'd head there at some point. I wasn't just dating you let the time pass by."

His face suddenly becomes very serious. "Me, either. Because I really—"

I pressed my lips against his, way too scared to hear what he had to say. I didn't wanna know if he was about to soberly confess that he was serious or not, but I don't think I was ready for it. Not yet.

Yes, I love Ryker. I love him so much my soul feels one with his. But...something about thinking further down the road makes my stomach queasy. I'm just not ready to think that far ahead.

Right now, I'm happy just being Ryker and Maddison. Happy and contently us.

He pulls back, a knowing look in his eyes. "You're definitely a keeper, that's for sure."

I wrinkle my nose and rest my chin on his chest. "I'm just crazy about you."

He smiles. "Can you say that again? I don't think I heard that right."

I roll my eyes. "I'm not repeating myself to feed your enormous ego."

He pouts. "You're no fun."

"You're acting like a child."

Ryker slowly rubs my back up and down, making me wanna flutter my eyes closed. I rest my cheek on his chest, taking a deep inhale.

"What did you talk about? With my brother? How'd you even get his number?"

I smirk. I knew he'd ask soon enough.

"I stole it from your phone, when you passed out on your bed."

"I'm sorry." He says quietly.

"Shh," I wave him off. "I grabbed your phone—hated your lock screen, by the way—and got his number. And when Ben was taking me home, I kept calling and calling until he answered. I asked Ben if he'd go get him, which he did and took him to your place. You're lucky Ben is a damn good friend," I look up at him. "We had a long chat about Kyler getting off his high horse and understanding how you're just hurt and you need to just talk about everything you're feeling. And he said that I don't know what I'm talking about."

"Did he say some shit to you? Cause I swear, I'll—"

My giggle cuts him off. "No, Ryker. He was surprisingly understanding."

I don't miss the way his lips turn upwards slightly. He nods, laying his head back on the bed.

"He sounded...sad. About Olivia."

"He is. I don't know how, but she somehow managed to get him to fall for her. And now he's heartbroken."

I hum in disapproval. "I hate her for what she's done to you, and now for what she's done to him. She's literally evil."

He lifts his head, a sly smirk on his lips. "Is that why you gave her a busted lip?"

My eyes widened. "Kyler told you?"

"Well, he said that you gave a very fake apology for it."

I roll my eyes. "I wasn't sure if he was gonna stay with her or not. So, I may have mentioned that I was kind of sorry for hitting her. Even though I wasn't."

"And why, my beautiful Maddison, did you hit her?"

I gave him a pointed look. "I'd rather not say."

"Come on, now." He wraps his arms securely around my waist. "Since when do we keep secrets from each other?"

I twist my lips. "It's not worth repeating, though."

"You're worth everything to me," he grabs my hand and laces our fingers together. "Tell me."

I look down at his chest, sighing heavily.

"She just told me that I wasn't good enough for you and that I didn't know how to handle you. And that you're broken." I blink and shake my head. "I didn't even realize that I had hit her until I did it, warning her to stay away from you."

His eyes shine, pushing some hair off my face. "You told her to stay away from me?"

I snort. "In a very Ryker-like fashion."

At that, he smiles. He grips my waist and turns me, hovering over my body. He's smiling down at me with pure love shining back at me in his eyes, it made my stomach flip.

"You don't believe her, do you?"

I shake my head instantly. "Of course not."

"Because you're it for me, Maddison." When I smile, his widens. "You're the only one good enough for me. If anything, I'm not good enough for you."

I place my hands on his shoulders, staring deep in his hazel eyes.

"You're good, Ryker. Everything about you. And I love every part of you. You're my other half." I repeat the words he'd said to me.

His eyes widen. "And you're mine."

As he lightly pressed his lips on mine, it's a slow, passionate kiss—one where you could feel the electricity flowing from him to me, and where you can feel it from the tip of my lips to the tip of my toes. The kind of kiss that screamed I love you.

And we kissed like that for a really, really long time.

A/N

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