"This might be a stupid question," Kat begins awkwardly as we exit Math club. "But is Dominic dating at the moment?" The question catches me off guard and I suddenly feel a ping of hurt. She knows I like him. What is she talking about? I blink a few times and she looks at me and immediately starts backtracking. "No, no, no, not like that! I was just thinking that maybe we can hang out and I can maybe get a feel of whether or not he likes you. I'm pretty good at sensing those things and maybe you can play it off that I'm interested in him."

"Oh..." my mouth open and closes as if absorbing relief. I really thought she was going to turn out to be fake. "No he's not actively dating but I can figure something out."

"Okay." There's a brief silence and she feels the need to continue, "no offense to him...or you, but he's definitely not my type."

"I get it. Are you free tonight? He and I are supposed to be grabbing dinner together but I don't think he'll mind if I invite you." He only thinks of you as his replacement.

"Sure, totally. What time?" she follows up and I squint as I try to remember.

"7." That gives her two hours. That's enough time to get ready, right? Is she going to bother getting ready? She already looks like a model. I want to yank at my hair. What if Dominic thinks she's cute and shows interest?

Of course Dominic is going to think she's cute! She is cute! She's tall and lean with long legs and wavy blonde hair. Her eyes are big and are a shade of brown that reminds me of coffee. Her smile is charming and she's such a positive person that you can't help but be happy around her. They'll bond over their shared love of sports and animals and they'll eventually fall in love. Or worse, they'll become friends and then best friends who eventually fall in love and I'll be displaced completely. Oh no, this is a bad idea.

"Where? Is it at one of the dining halls or-?" I cut her off.

"It's a restaurant not too far from here. I can send you the address," I reply in an attempt to be casual. Don't let her know you're threatened by her. "Do you want to ride with us or are you cool with driving there?

"I'll drive," she smiles before pointing outside. "I've got to take a shower. See you later."

When she disappears, I find myself rubbing at my eyes with my palms anxiously. On an undramatic note, she's so pretty; what if he flirts with her? My heart will shatter right at that dinner table. I should've told her that this is a bad idea. I stare at her small retreating figure contemplating whether or not I should cancel when I decide against it. At least after tonight I'll have a better idea of my standing with Dominic.

I decide to let him in on the plans for the night, seeing as he is the one that set things up. I fish my phone out of my pocket and press his contact. He doesn't answer the first time so I call once more. He answers, sounding breathless. I close my eyes to purify my thoughts as he exhales a greeting. "Um...am I interrupting something?" I feel the familiar fire-pit start up in my stomach.

"No, no, I was just finishing a workout." Nice.

"With a girl?" I joke and he laughs.

"No, at the gym. While you're out and about on your dates, I decided to get back to the gym," he says matter-of-factly. "So I was just finishing a workout with weights and treadmills and whatnot." I smirk to myself as I imagine him sweaty and breathing heavily; this causes the fire in my gut to burn harder, which isn't helping me to focus on the conversation. "Nova?"

"Oh, yeah, sorry." My cheeks burn a little. "I just wanted to let you know that I invited someone to our dinner."

"I swear, if you invited Elias-," he attempts to complain but I cut him off quickly.

"No, I haven't talked to him at all," I retort and my stomach flips at the thought of him. The fire is effectively put out.

"Then who'd you invite?" He is now genuinely curious. Am I that antisocial that he can't put two and two together and assume it's Kat?

"Kat." He makes a noise of approval.

"Okay, sounds good to me. I've been meaning to meet her. Does she need a ride?" he continues the conversation.

"No, she has a car." I feel my gut twist at the idea of him being excited to meet her. What does that even mean?

"Okay, can I call you back? I'm about to take a shower. Unless you'd like to Facetime..." Boy, would I...

"Goodbye Dominic," I announce bluntly before I have a very late realization. Maybe if I let him know that Kat's interested, he'll be a bit more honest with his interactions. He's said it himself; he hates leading people on so he wouldn't flirt with her knowing that she's interested if he isn't. "Wait!"

"Are you going to agree to Facetime?" I sigh loudly at his response.

"What? No. I just want to know if you're seeing anyone." I feel stupid asking this question. I already know the answer.

"Oh, that's boring," he mumbles. "Seeing as in dating?"

"Yes."

"No, why would I keep that from you?" He's suspicious, which is a good thing.

"I was just making sure." There's a short pause and he immediately catches on.

"Why? Oh wait no, are you trying to play matchmaker with Kat? Nova, you better-," he starts but I cut him off.

"Bye, Dominic. Have fun in the shower." I quickly hang up and head back to my dorm to start getting ready.

+++

Dominic pulls up to my building and I offer him a small smile. His flat eyes and tight lipped expression give off nothing less than annoyance. It's rare that he expresses emotions that aren't positive so when he does, I have to intensify my happy emotions to maintain our usual balance. I buckle my seatbelt and grin at him, trying to be as nice as possible. Seeing as he's not moving the car yet, I prop my arm on the center console and rest my face in my palm. Gazing up at him, I bat my lashes, widen my smile, and sweeten my voice. "Hi, Dommy."

"Dommy?" His expression falters as he's thrown off by my newfound attitude.

"How was your day?" I draw out every word and he stares at me

"You can cut the act. I'm not going to forgive you for this," he blurts, which surprises me a bit. He usually caves immediately when I break out my nice girl act. "No apology can excuse your conniving behaviors."

"None?" I ask with a smirk before I can stop myself.

He glances at me from the corner of his eye as he pulls out of the lot. I return to my normal seating position and keep my eyes locked on him "I'm going to assume you mean that innocently, so no. I was just expecting a relaxed dinner with my best friend. Now I have to go and be polite and funny and make small talk."

"She asked me to meet you. What could I have said?" I mean other than the obvious 'no' answer. Then again, I planned this entire thing so really, what could I have said?

"'No?'" he suggests sarcastically.

"I couldn't! I already confirmed to her that you weren't dating anyone." This plan better not backfire.

"Jeez, Nova, is there anything that you don't tell people about me?" He gives me a slightly exasperated glance and I frown a little.

I poke out my bottom lip and widen my eyes, blinking rapidly. "I love bragging about you. You're my best friend."

He looks at me and sighs. "You know, I hate the affect you have on me," he grumbles as his eyes fall on me for a short second.

"Come on, smile." I give a light nudge to his side. He stops fighting it, shakes his head, and continues in the direction of the restaurant. "How could you say no to this face?"

"I can't. That's my problem." Good to know.

As we slow to a red light, he puts his hand on my face and lightly pushes it back. I gasp and lick his palm, which earns a grunt from him. He rubs his hand on his jeans and shakes his head. "I don't mind you licking me but I'd prefer it to be elsewhere." Immediately, my heart begins to beat faster.

"Where would you prefer I lick you?" It suddenly occurs to me that I've said the words aloud rather than the sanctity of my mind. His head snaps in my direction as my mouth slightly gapes.

"Huh?" he asks in pure shock. My face is now bright red and his face is a mixture of entertained and surprised.

"Anyway," I quickly change the topic before I can dig myself deeper, "it's going to be fun." I trust that it won't. 

"I don't think so." I'm grateful he dropped the accidental flirtatious comment I made. Other than curious fleeting glances, he doesn't mention it again.

"It will be." The only reason I'm this happy is because of the amount of dread he has for this last minute change. Maybe he won't be interested in her. But then again, maybe his opinion will change when he sees her.

"What is she like? So I know what to talk about?" 

"She plays volleyball," I struggle to list. All we really talk about is him and Eli and boys she's talking to. "She lives on a farm and has horses. She is an only child. She wants to be a vet."

"Jeez, could you get me someone any more boring? You suck at playing matchmaker."

"Yeah it may not be a perfect match but she's really pretty." I've been lying to him so much lately that it's become almost second nature; it's very bad now that I think about it. "I'm actually a good matchmaker when the person doesn't make the match themselves and then ask me to act upon it."

"Oh yeah, how would you know?" he inquires.

I don't. I would just imagine that I'd pick someone more suited for him. "Because I know you well enough to pick a girl that you'd actually like."

"Oh really?" he spares a glance at me.

"Yeah." I'm pretty confident in my ability.

"Okay, so scenario: I ask you to find a girl for me. Describe the girl you'll pick," he prompts.

Me, I want to say but decide against it. I've had one too many slip ups today. Plus, I don't want to have to watch him pull over and start crying as he pukes his lunch up into the grass. I'd probably have to steal his car and go drive off a cliff from embarrassment. Instead, I rack my brain for the characteristics he listed in our last conversation about this topic. 

"You said you don't have a physical type so I'll just pick a pretty girl, I guess. She'll be funny and smart. She'll know what she wants and she'll go after it. She'll be adventurous and extroverted like you-," I attempt but he cuts me off with a loud imitation buzzer noise.

"I don't care if she's adventurous or an extrovert. You failed at playing matchmaker." My mouth falls into a gap as I stare at him.

"You said you don't care, not that you don't want it!" I cross my arms over my chest as I glare at him.

"I know your kind of guy in three words: White, lanky, nerdy," he blurts and I scoff noisily.

"First of all, I have a much more diverse taste than that-," I try to explain but he stops me.

"Every boy you've had a crush on fits that criteria," he retorts. "Thinking someone's cute doesn't count. I'm talking crushes; you sit and grow feelings for that person."

"Not true."

"Alex Huntington," he reminds me.

"He was on the basketball team! He wasn't nerdy! Or lanky," I retort. He was actually quite lean. And though I never really had a thing for him, no one could deny his good looks.

"That kid was a string bean if I've ever seen one. And he was the only kid on that team with a GPA higher than 3.5. And don't even try to define Eli because he was the epitome of your type."

"Okay, just because I didn't tell you about a crush doesn't mean I didn't have one." His eyes widen in shock as he looks from me to the road then back.

"Then tell me someone who doesn't fit the criteria."You, you idiot!

"No." I tighten my arms over my chest.

"Why not? Do I know him?" He keeps up his occasional peeking over at me.

"Nope." I can't hide the shake in my voice and he lets out a satisfied laugh.

"I know him, don't I?" He seems a little too excited to find out about who I had a crush on in the past.

"Leave it alone," I insist as we pull into a parking spot.

"You know I'm not going to. But for now, I will be a good boy."

"Promise me you'll be nice. She is my friend, after all." I give him a pointed glance and he grins cheekily.

"When am I ever mean?" We get out of the car simultaneously, barely reaching the sidewalk before Kat's familiar vehicle pulls into the spot beside ours.

"Hey." My eyes widen a little at her clothing. It's not like she overdressed. She's just so pretty. She changed out of her sweatpants and went for the simple sweater dress and legging look with ankle boots. I admire the length of her legs and sway of her hips as she walks in our direction. I glance at Dominic to see if he's as mesmerized as I am but he's paying more attention to her car than her. That's a good sign, right?

"Hey, Kat." I pull Dominic back into conversation and he turns his gaze from her buggy to her. "Kat, this is Dominic. Dominic, this is Kat."

His hand, which is buried deep in his hoodie pockets, doesn't appear to shake hers. She doesn't seem to mind and goes for a friendly head nod instead. "It's nice to meet you. I've heard a lot about you," she greets him.

"I can say the same about you," he replies as he approaches the door. He holds it open for us and I let her enter first. The way her legs sway makes me a bit insecure at the shorter length of mine. I try to imitate her casually and Dominic leans down to my ear.

"Are you still sore from ice skating?" he asks, referencing the beating I took only two days ago. Though the answer is yes, I feel a bit embarrassed that I looked that bad.

"Yeah, a little," I lie and he nods understandingly.

"3?" the hostess asks and we all nod. I betray Dominic and sit beside Kat, so she feels more comfortable and so I can assess his reactions to her. He gives me a fleeting glance before picking up his menu.

The conversation doesn't pick up until we get our food. Dominic takes a large bite of his burger, chews, swallows, and poses a question. "So, Kat, what do you like to do?" he asks.

"I play volleyball and I horseback ride," she answers perkily and Dominic visibly cringes.

"Really? You like horses?" She nods. "They're so...creepy."

I almost cough on my food as I look at him. Kat laughs at this and smiles. "You're not the first person to say that. I grew up around horses so I guess they're to me what dogs are to you."

"Ugh, I hate dogs, too." I stare at him. What a bold faced lie! He loves dogs! More specifically, my dogs! He threatens to steal my pups whenever he comes over. "Actually, I don't really like animals."

"What? Why not?" She seems completely unfazed by this major dissimilarity. By the looks of it, she seemed to have been expecting a similar reaction.

"Because animals are dumb," he confesses with a shrug. "To me, at least. Anyway, what's your major?"

"Veterinary medicine," she replies with an amused grin. "What's yours?"

"Math," he answers honestly. Finally- he's been lying so much that I've had to repress the urge to make a list of them on my phone. "I want to be a high school math teacher."

"We love math, right, Kat?" I nudge her lightly and she slowly nods.

"Yeah, why don't you join Math Club?" she asks him, which earns a quick head shake from him.

"I do enough math in the major," he answers with a half smile.

"I hear you play baseball." Yes, get on the topic of sports. Maybe he'll actually contribute truthful commentary.

"I did." He leaves it at that.

"Why'd you stop?" She stares at him expectantly and he shrugs.

"I stopped liking it," he oversimplifies. I want to pipe in that it's more complicated than that but I don't bother. "I guess it has to do with my commitment issues."

I stare at him and practically choke on my water. He's literally sabotaging this get together to get her to lose interest in him. "I don't think that's it. Sometimes, we just lose interest in things." Her attempts at comforting him fall short because he just raises and drops his shoulders.

Whichever direction the conversation takes, Dominic politely but strongly stands on the opposing side. Somehow he never manages to come off as offensive. Kat tries to find common points but Dominic only agrees with barely half of what she says. By the end of the night, I can tell that Kat has come to a conclusion by the way she drifts to her car when we get outside.

We get into the car and Dominic hums happily. "You're so dramatic."

"I had no choice but to be. A lot of girls are willing to look past a couple differences. She kept smiling and trying to change my perspective. I was two minutes away from telling her I put puppies in bags and use them as batting practice." I immediately shake my head at him.

"There's a special place in Hell for you," I promise him and he grins mischievously. 

"Yeah, and you'll be right there with me, sitting on my lap," he smirks and I bite back a smile.

"Can I ask you something?" He perks up a bit before risking a glance at me.

"You know, every time you say that, I get scared. I'd prefer if you just ask," he informs me, which gets an evil chuckle out of me.

"Why aren't you dating or...whatever you call what you were doing in high school? I know we talked about it before and you said you didn't feel like it but you don't miss it?"

He hesitates for a second and bites his lip. "I don't know. I tried it here, but it's not really what interests me anymore. But I also don't know about a serious relationship, either." I feel my heart falter a bit. There goes that distant dream.

"You always complain to me that you're not getting any action yet you're not going out and getting it." Why am I encouraging him? I should be begging him to keep that no more dating mindset until he dies.

"It's a joke. I'm still alive, right?" He averts my gaze and my suspicious look turns into a glare.

"Are you hiding something from me?" Ironic, right? Here I am hiding practically everything from him yet I have the audacity to accuse him of keeping secrets.

"Okay, you got me," he exhales dramatically. "The reason I'm not dating anyone is because I'm madly in love with you."

I don't even bother looking at him as I fall into fits of laughter. Even though that's one of my deepest desires, I can take a good joke, even if it's at my expense. "That's funny," I say once my laughter dwindles and reality sets back in.

"See, this is why I can't tell you anything...because you laugh at me," he retorts with a playful shake of his head.

I continue to laugh, but for a different reason. When he said that, I didn't even think that it was true for a second. That's how confident I am that he could ever see me as more than his best friend. But I continue to press. And here comes the most cliche but true line to ever exist in a one sided love story: just because I like him doesn't mean I don't want to see him happy, even if it's with some other girl.

By the time we reach my dorm, he's frustrated with me for pestering so much. "Look, Nova, I'm fine. I don't need to date to be happy. I am perfectly fine. If you need an exact reason, here's one: I don't want to date right now because I don't have time and I just don't want to. Is that good enough for you?"

"Sure," I reply, even though I feel like there's something he's hiding from me. It's odd because for the entirety of our friendship, he's been single but never alone if that makes sense. "I hope I didn't make you too upset today. I didn't intend to be as annoying as I was."

"You're not annoying, Nova. I could never be annoyed by you," he assures me as he pats my head lightly. He leans over and kisses my forehead, which send my stomach butterflies into the ever too familiar frenzy. "Now go inside before I break hard and have you fly through my windshield."

I grin at him before heading inside. I wonder what he's hiding from me.

+++

It's 3AM and I'm sitting in the completely silent lounge in the first floor of my building. In a sleepless state, I snuck downstairs with my current read and sat down to finish it. It was a stupid love story that has me wondering if I'm the reason Dominic isn't dating anyone. What if I'm taking up too much of his time? He even said it himself that he doesn't have time. What if it's because he's around me too much?

I grab my phone and call him, forgetting that it's 3 in the morning and he's probably asleep. Before I can quickly hang up, he answers. "Nova?" he mumbles in a deep, sleepy voice. I try not to acknowledge it too much.

"Is it because I'm too needy?" I may as well ask seeing as he's on the line.

"What are you talking about?"

"Are you not dating girls because I'm too needy?" How must this look? I'm calling him at three in the morning asking if I'm too needy. If he didn't think I was before, he does now.

"Huh?" he says in confusion.

"I'm always taking up your time, insisting we hang out and showing up to your dorm uninvited. I take up too much of your time, right?" I further explain.

"No," he replies as if it was the stupidest thing I could ever suggest.

"Are you sure?" 

"Nova...it is three in the morning. Are you really sitting up thinking about my dating life?"

"No...I just can't sleep so I came down to the lounge to read and it just came to mind. If you want space, you can just tell me. It won't hurt my feelings."

"Nova, I'm fine. You're fine. We're fine," he assures me in his same sleepy voice.

"I'm sorry. I'm just really emotional right now," I confess.

"Your period?"

"No, I was just reading a stupid book," I answer. "My period just ended though, so maybe."

"Tell you what; if you stop thinking about my dating life for just a couple hours and get some sleep, I'll buy you whatever chocolate you want tomorrow," he convinces me.

"Okay, goodnight," I mutter before hanging up. I head up to my room, thinking about which chocolate I'm going to make him buy for me.