vent :(
Sorry, you suddenly see this. I'm just not feeling well about myself.
I know y'all not my therapist but I feel like writing this.
Why do I act like this, I don't understand why I suddenly act like this.
I feel such a fool person, I feel selfish about my actions and I feel like I'm not acting like myself. I just wanna to change a better person but I'm not.
I just feel so stupid about myself, I just hate my actions. I'm just afraid that I might hurt someone or do something wrong. I'm just scared. I just hate acting so fake. People just don't notice about how I feel.
I mainly not focused on my looks because I'm more focusing on my thoughts. I just trying not to hate myself because hate is strong word. I tried to be positive and confident about myself but I failed, always think about negative.
I feel like my therapist just testing me if I'm going to feel bad about myself. I always never like expressing my emotions or how I feel, because I'm just SCARED that what people think of me or taking advantage of me.
My mental health is not doing so well. Tbh, I hate crying and letting my tears out. I never like going outside because I feel afraid. Going outside and social other people is not easy because I realized that suddenly, my actions changed.
I promise to myself that I won't do this again. I just want someone who noticed about how I feel and comfort me not just stare at me because I feel like I do something wrong.
I hate when people try to ship me with other people makes me feel upset about it. I never like people shipping me and someone because it makes me feel uncomfortable. I don't feel like going in relationship because it big deal and I rather not until I'm ready or not.
I always wondered why I always keep saying "I don't know" That word only thing when comes my feelings, questions, and asking.
I never really like talking to people often because I'm scared and think that I'm annoying person. I always cover my feelings up and make it like it was never happened.
I love my family at all but just I don't know. I always wanted to show my appreciation to my family but too shy and afraid.
Again, sorry for posting this. 412 words
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