Hunter: can my dog play basketball??

Sam: *whispers to Andrew* I'll give you $10 if you say yes

Andrew: ..sure

__________

Hunter: who the fuck do you think you are?

Sam: for a long time I thought I was depressed

Hunter: aw dude-

Sam: turns out I just really like dogs and when they leave I get sad

_______

More coming soon these are the only two I really remember