Brace yourselves, the end is here 😌

Yashodha settled at her writing table for the umpteenth time since she had return home a month ago. The attempt to write once again seemed hard this time. Perhaps the reason, she was about to pour her heart out on papers. 

She did it over four years ago which happened to be easy. The letter was to her friend, in search for comforting words when things wasn't really going well for her. When she received a reply for her letter, it wasn't from her friend but from someone else who had read the letter.

The words written by that someone act as soothing and calming medicine for her PTSD. They began exchanging letters in a not so frequent manner. However, she was getting accustomed to those words. Yashodha attempted to find her pen-pal. Though she knew the exact address, she didn't want to make it obvious by appearing at the doorstep. 

Plus, it wasn't a hard task for her to locate her pen-pal, given that every letter she received came with an unofficial letter head. 

She found his workplace at the Mumbai Naval Dockyard. A naval officer, he was. Yashodha had used the opportunity she was offered to apply for short service at the same place her pen-pal worked. She wanted to know him personally and she did. She succeeded.

She had not only found peace in those words, she was falling for her pen-pal by the end of their two years of writing. He charmed her with his written words, it gave her the comfort and the assurance she needed to brace herself from the trauma of her broken marriage.

Finding him was the best thing she had done.

A satisfactory smile stretched on her lips.

She sat at her writing table once again. A paper and a pen, she started scribbling, determined to write.

Dear, Jagdish.

I hope you are doing well. It's been quite sometime since we had exchanged letters but that's okay. I have had a great opportunity to meet and befriend with you in exchange of the letters. Just like how your writing had fascinated me, you did tenfold of the same in person. I knew why I wanted to take the effort to meet you but to convince myself the after effect was the hard part. 

By now, your eyes would have did a quick check and ended with a wide eye at the name written at the bottom left. Yes, that's me, Mr. Cool. Now you should have known why I had mentioned that you know more than anyone else do at the swimming pool that day.

I wanted to meet you for one reason, to thank you but a lot had happened and here I am writing this letter to you for whole different reason which I'll save it when we meet. For now, Thank you for everything.  

Cutting this letter writing short and I'll tell the rest in person.  

See you soon, 
Yours,
Yashodha a.k.a. Yami

Jagdish's eyes went wide as though they would pop out of their socket and slowly his lips formed an upward crescent, fastening his breath. It was beyond his imagination that the letters he had written as a form of support was to Yashodha, herself. That lady did not utter about it even once when they were together talking on random stuffs. She knew him even before they met back in Mumbai.

The revelation gave him a mixed emotion, he wasn't sure how to react at first but slowly came to an understanding. Perhaps, she didn't want to be judged since he knew everything about her past, he thought. 

Shrugging off the thought, Jagdish was more than excited that he will be meeting her soon. That brings him to the breaking point. He hasn't confess it to her yet and he wasn't sure how do it either.  

-------

Yashodha took another month after sending her letter to finally meet Jagdish. They had not exchanged phone calls nor letters. A month went by with just silence from either side for no particular reason though there was an obvious reason for both the officers whom had indulge themselves in duty. 

One were by the mountains, guarding the border while the other was in the ocean. 

There she was, putting every responsibilities she had on hold to meet the man and spend time with him as someone she really wanted to be around him. What is she for him? She doesn't know yet but she had a slight hope he has the same thing for her as she does. Yashodha wanted to be his even for the shortest time they get. 

She begin to realise how deeply and madly she was in love with him each time she reminisced their moments and what his presence made her feel. More than reminiscing their moments together, the more times she read his letters the more she was falling for his words. 

Yashodha reached the place they were supposed to meet. It was at the rocky coastal drive way. A place where people hardly visit. She walked further down along the rocky path and found him lost gazing far at the horizon. Her heart beat raced as though it would escape out any moment.

She slowly stretched her hand and tapped his shoulder. His tensed muscles instantly relaxed when he turned to her.

"Hi!" She greeted with a wide smile splashed with a tint of shyness. Her eyes smiled emitting a radiance he never seen before. He felt drowning in the galaxy her eyes held.  

No verbal communication from his side as he stood stumped before he wrapped her in a warm swaddle. She being in his arms finally after two months felt good. So good to see her healthy as always. He could feel his heart beating against his chest.

Yashodha didn't protest, she needed it too. She had longed for his hug. The last time she saw him wasn't something she wanted to remember. She was glad to see him back in his crisp white uniform she adores him the most. She let her body sag and her muscles loose. No, she didn't want to be the tough soldiers when she is with him and no, she doesn't want to hide her feelings for him any longer. 

Every seconds were becoming precious to her ever since the fall.

"I don't know if I had missed you so much in the last two years like I had missed you in this two months" he whispered, breaking the embrace.

"I missed you too" her voice rang softly. 

Those words meant a lot more than what he wished to hear from her. 

Jagdish took a moment, searching her eyes then let out a light chuckle. "I can't believe it's you" he said. His hands held hers, firmly.

"Why? Were you expecting someone else?" Her brows drew together, frowning.

"No silly. I'm talking about the letter" he tapped her head lightly.

"But I knew it was you all the while" she wiggled her brows with satisfaction. Her eyes twinkled, he was going crazy as he stared deep into her love filled orbs.

There was no need of confessing it outright. They understood what they meant for each other by the way they held one another, the way they gaze each other and the words that escapes their lips. 

All of it screamed, love.

He closed his eyes and joined their forehead. There were a lot to say and very less time, he had to leave back to the dock soon. Jagdish didn't know where to start. He felt her hand rested on his chest, he held it tight.

"It wasn't easy being away from you and not hearing anything about you all the while. At times I felt, I should just dive into the sea and swim back to meet you just once" he chuckled. 

"You know, the easy part happened without me realising, admitting that I do was the hardest. How a numbskull, I am? It took me the worst moment of all to realise that .... I love you. The image of you motionless on the ground stuck in my mind like a leech. It's still vivid. I was hell scared that I'd lost you that day" tears sipped out of his eyes, the images flashed once again as he speak. 

Yashodha cupped his face in her hands, "Shh... It's fine. It will fade away. I must thank you. You were a reason for me to fight against death. Had you not called me when I was falling, I would have died. I wouldn't have fought to stay alive" she said and made him stare at her hard. He didn't like the words that came out of her lips. 

"Don't you say that again" he warned and clasped her in his arms.

"I won't," her voice reverberated against his chest.

There was a soothing kind of stillness enveloped them as they stood clung onto each other. Sharing warmth and sparking the flames they had ignited into each other. 

Jagdish pulled away from her, he remembered he had to tell her though it seems to be not necessary, now they know the feel they share. However, it's always best to be like a gentleman and say it. Thus, he took in a deep breath filled with the smell of the ocean.

He held her calloused palms in his, "I have decided to give up my life principles which I had been holding onto. There is an offer of a lifetime promise from me and it's only open for you" he said, drawing his lips between his teeth with raise of his eyebrows. 

The corner of her mouth quirked up, those words excited her. A promise of a lifetime. She never thought she would ever hear or believe in those  words again. But coming from him felt as if she would do anything to have that promise. 

"That's a very tempting offer, thank you" she gave a fitting reply while her cheeks were painted in the hues of pink. "I'll take that" she said, tugging the hair flying over her face. 

A beautiful moment and no interruption, that will never be the case for the officers. Their time were cut short when a young sailor called Jagdish from far. He was needed back at the dockyard, his break time was up and he had to go. 

"Sorry," there was a hint of glum in his tone. 

"That's all right. Go now, you are getting late" she pushed him to move. 

"I'll see you in the evening" he said and marched towards the dockyard then turned back to her. 

It was then he noticed she looked like an angel in the white flowy dress facing the ocean. The view was too beautiful not to capture, he took out his phone and clicked pictures of his two loves meeting each other.

One, the ocean and the other, Yashodha.  

------

Jagdish pushed himself through the crowded dance floor filled with sweaty bodies and up the first floor. He managed to weave through the dancing souls and reached Yashodha at the bar counter. Her smile so beautiful, so captivating. 'God I love this woman'

"Why here?" the first thing he asked upon taking a seat next to her while he scanned the surrounding. 

"Don't worry. There's no illegal activity like the last time we were at a club" she laughed. 

" and we are here to celebrate. What else?" she screamed trying to over power the music. 

"Nice" he said feeling a little dejected. Jagdish thought he would take her for a dinner date in some fancy restaurant but Yashodha took the lead. Here they are at a club that's full on a Tuesday night. 

Sighed, he ordered a drink for himself and swayed his body to the music. No fancy dinner, it doesn't matter. What matters was, Yashodha with him.

"Hey! Tell me about Yami" he asked suddenly remembering about the letter and her pen name.

"Oh! Yami was a name given to me by a friend. To whom I actually wrote the letter. She used to call me Yashodha mummy because I was protective towards her. Yashodha mummy got shorten to Yami," she shrugged and sipped her drink slowly letting the light burning liquid flow down her throat. 

"Have you found her?" he asked to which she only shook her head. 

"Okay, we shouldn't have spoken about her. I miss her and I can't find her. I need to take her out of my head" Yashodha finished her drink in a gulp and was up on her feet. "It's a nice song, maybe we should dance" she did not wait for Jagdish to respond as she squeezed herself through the crowd and grooved to the music. 

Soon, she had her partner in her arms. 

By the end of the song, Yashodha moved away from the crowd and leaned on the railing. She waited for Jagdish to join her. When he managed to push himself out, a sudden shiver ran down his spine. He felt warm spreading all over him as fear crept in. Jagdish became panic when he saw her standing by the railing. Flashes of Yashodha falling from there appeared, throwing him back to the day it happened. 

Yashodha watched him with alarm. His appearance confused her as he rushed to her and pulled her out of the club.

"Let's go" he said, walking through the crowd. 

"Jagdish, what's wrong?" Yashodha managed to stop him when they were at a far distance from the club. He was all sweaty and stressed. 

"We should leave" said that he walked pulling her along until Yashodha made another forceful stop. 

"We reached the hotel" she pointed to the building they stood before. 

He did not exchange a single word, Jagdish quietly followed Yashodha to her room. Dropped himself on the bed with a hunched body, he buried his face in his palms, leaving Yashodha absolutely clueless. 

He had never behaved as such before, he made her wonder if something had happened in the club that upset him or had she said something offending. 

"Sorry" his muffled voice pulled her out of her mind. 

"For what?" 

"For dragging you out from there" 

"But why did you do that?" 

He pulled his face off his hands and stared at her with teary eyes. "It's not leaving me, Yasho"

"What's not leaving you and why are you crying?" 

"The fall. You laying motionless. The fear. None are leaving me. I thought when I see you fit and fine, those images will go off but it didn't. See, you are right before me yet I can still see flashes of images running in my head" he spoke, panicked. 

Unaware of what to do, Yashodha sat still holding his hand in hers as he kept mumbling of the same. The incident hit him really hard, she feared he has got traumatized. She cursed Agasthya inwardly for forcefully dragging Jagdish to witness her fall. 

"Jagdish, you need to stop concentrating on that" she cupped his face made him look at her. "you need to take that off your head. Look, I'm here before you in good shape. What you see in your head isn't me" she firmly said, staring deep into his eyes.

"It's like a nightmare, Yasho. I never knew it will haunt me" 

"Shh... it will pass" she pulled him into a tight embrace, attempting to help him forget that day. 

------

Jagdish silent stood by the small window, staring at the dark ocean. He somehow recovered from the traumatic moment in a short while. They then had takeaway for dinner and spoke a lot. However, he was still in a little traumatic state.

Yashodha watched him from far. This wasn't how she wanted her visit to end with him sulking over his own behavior. She wanted him to be how he used to be, cheerful. 

Frustrated, Yashodha stomped her feet before getting up from the bed. She walked over to him, took his arm and wrapped it around her shoulder. "If you are going staring at the ocean when I'm here, you will be bound to miss me more once I leave," she said. 

He looked at her with a smallest of a smile. "I'm trying to gather myself back. I'm not going to let you go back upset" he locked her in his arms. 

"Good" a deep curve formed on her pretty lips.

Ah–the smile, he was falling heavily for the smile too. He loved everything about her. But his favorite will always be the smokey quartz stone that shines brightly each time his gaze fell upon it. Her brown orbs.

Their gaze locked drowning each other in love and passion. Yashodha blush deepen under his scrutiny. Jagdish gazed at her lovingly, his eyes softening with tenderness before sparking with something else.

He held her gently, cupped her face with one hand while the other brushed up and down her arm luring shivers out of her. Her cheeks blushed hotly under his intense gaze. He leaned down and softly kissed the tender area of her neck. The touch of his lips on her skin trembled her body and an euphoric warmth bloomed within her.

The feathery kisses left trails of spark as he found her awaiting tender lips. Her body flushed with heat that traveled through her veins, warming her.

Jagdish's grip tightened, crushing her body to his, gentle yet firm. He leaned further, deepening the kiss.

A pure pleasure ran through his entire body, the touch of her lips on his formed bliss he had never felt before. So much of love and passion, it was intoxicating him. He was losing himself in her as she locked her arms around his neck. Her soft and gentle kisses were of it own flicker of warmth.

They drew back, breathless with delight. Yashodha wrapped her arms around him and held him tight.

The reality hit her. The next morning they will be parting ways again to devote themselves for the nation. She wasn't worried about serving the country, Yashodha took pride in it but... Leaving him and not seeing for him the next four-five months, the very thought was crushing her down.

She felt him brushing her hair, he kissed the top of her head.

"I know what you are think about" he said, resting his chin on her head. "This is not the last we are going to meet, right?"

"I know" She nodded and closed her eyes savoring the moment. 

-----

Morning started early for them as Jagdish prepared himself for work while Yashodha packed her bag to leave.

As Yashodha stood before the mirror, Jagdish moved next to her and pushed her away so, he could use the mirror. A little push fight for the mirror started.

"Jagdish, why are you fighting for the mirror? You will be going back to your quarters to get ready, right?" She scoffed.

"Yes but just want to spice the dull morning" he said wriggling his brows. "We don't get everyday to fight for the mirror like those normal couple do, right?... maybe they don't... Wait, do they?" he asked confused with his own statement. 

"How do I know? " She shook her head and quickly did her hair. 

It was seven in the morning, supposedly Jagdish had to be at the ground for morning training. However, he skipped the routine to spend the extra little time with her before he leaves. 

Yashodha glance at her watch, "It's time. You better get moving. By the time you reach your quarters it will be eight" she said dragging him to the door. 

"Now you are hell bent in sending me away, Yasho" he whined. 

"If I don't push you out, you will not leave this place"

"Fine, you take care alright" he mumbled and spread his arms for one more hug before they depart. It was a hard departure but they had to go on their separate ways to join later than to separate again and to continue the same.

It's going to be a routine lifestyle for them and they were ready to take the challenges that were to follow. After all, they are armed forces in love who consider both their love interests, their motherland and partner seriously.