[ happy new year, wishing you all a beautiful and joyous 2020 may you achieve your dreams and reach the stars and beyond!
oh and shy martin anyone? (title >.<) ]

[ chapter 42 ]
hold on a little longer

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

THE next time their eyes meet is a time not a soul predicts. it's around midday and the streets are alive with stained fabrics and hot food, plastic bags strung over elbows and stuffed to the brim. buskers dot the mouths of the stations greeting bidding workers with languid tones lit with camera flashlights from whistling overlookers.

it's hot that fall afternoon, stuffy and claustrophobic. the warmth of the dozens swarms the open space, bustling and loud over the speakers of soulful voices. it happens that taehyung is one of the many crammed into the picture, a bag slung over one shoulder as he's swiftly carried amongst the crowd until his elbows sharpen enough to worm an escape.

exhaling, almost in relief at the newly recruited bubble of personal space he'd been so terribly deprived of mere seconds before, his feet stride past cobblestone and upon laminated floors, a path he'd followed enough to walk with a blindfold on.

8th isle. around halfway down and taehyung already smells his scented bath paired with his favourite silk night robe once he's roped his catch and zipped out of the store.

in fact, he's literally a single millimetre of whisking the last remaining container of holy grail when there are long pale hands darting forward and encasing his own.

"let the fuck go."

"nu-uh princess, not today."

taehyung thinks if it weren't for his pounding headache and paper-thin patience, he'd almost be embarrassed at his vulgarity so early in their conversation. then he supposes it was one with yours truly and well manners seemed to fly out of the window whenever he caught a whiff of that atrociously stupid bunny-smirk he thinks jimin's brainless for thinking is hot.

"jeongguk." he grits, the name almost bitter across his tongue and he swallows thickly as if the taste was the mere aftertaste of extra strong caffeine before a particularly difficult surgery, "let go."

"nah," jeongguk grins cooly, "kinda in the mood to hold onto you a little longer."

mood.

he'd been in a terrible snotty one last week. one from when he'd been promptly booted to the back door and shoved into radio silence from the very man before him.

now jeongguk, after literally rejecting him with his best friend behind the door and leaving not just him but their entire circle of friends in the cold for the next two weeks, thought it was okay he could flirt with him?

the younger better be damn thankful they were in public because if they weren't he'd have dropped kicked him up to mars with a swollen behind as a souvenir.

"look, jeongguk." he sighs, fingers still firmly taught beneath the cardboard casing of the cake and a stiff smile wrung to his lips, "i had like the shittiest day at work today and i'm seriously not in the mood for your immature bull, so let me have the cake and we can pretend we never saw each other today, cool?"

jeongguk pauses and for a moment he appears in deep musing, thin lips caught between his front teeth and a gentle crease between his eyebrows - and no, taehyung feels absolutely no itching need to reach over and smooth it out, no, not at all -.

and then his thoughtful facade seems to shatter at the seams, a goofy grin turning his lips as his fingers fall from the container, instead opting to curl around the elder's waist and draw their bodies flush against one another.

taehyung pretends he doesn't notice the way the younger's lips twitch at the startled yep that leaves his own at the gesture, primarily to keep his bristling irritation at bay.

"well you should've said!" he says as if the elder hadn't appeared sour or grouchy in the slightest way the moment they'd met eyes.

scoffing, taehyung's quick to shove his way out of the embarrassingly intimate embrace, in public may he add, fingers splaying across jeongguk's chest to wriggle the best he could - and again, no he was not flustered in the slightest at the rigid lines his fingers are met with -.

"why are you trying to run away, huh silver?" jeongguk murmurs, and taehyung's suddenly terribly aware of how close his lips were to his ears, a mere accidental turn of the head and against his own, "didn't i tell you i wanted to hold you?"

swallowing and stomaching the urge to shiver when the younger's gaze drops to his throat, a dark gaze glazed across his eyes, taehyung drops his hands from his chest and instead to his biceps, internally regretting the movement even further when he's met with firmer muscles that flex beneath his fingertips.

"well," he says thickly, "we don't always get what we want."

jeongguk laughs, that sort of quiet huff out of a nose and a quirk of lips that has taehyung weak at the knees and for a moment he's thankful the younger's holding him.

"maybe."

taehyung can't help the squeak that slips past his lips when he's pulled even closer and jeongguk's is nudging his legs apart, knee brushing so slightly against his crotch he could mistake it for the wind.

"but if it's anything to do with you i'd burn through heaven and hell to get it," he whispers against his neck and taehyung hopes he can't feel his racing pulse or the way his spine involuntarily curls when his knee presses down.

he wonders why the isle is completely bare then, why there was no other soul in search for the shop's famous mud cakes and other bakery goods.

maybe it was a gift. he didn't want to be seen so vulnerable by any random stranger.

and especially not jeon jeongguk.

"i will fucking call rape for the whole of korea to hear if you don't let go of me soon." he snarls, swallowing the timid buckle of his knees when jeongguk's eyes glaze over his lips.

"that's cute," jeongguk laughs, seemingly undisturbed, "but you and i both know you don't have the balls to do anything publicly humiliating-"

"HELP! I'M BEING- "

the rest of his words are drowned out by the younger's palm, his eyes lit with amusement despite the scowl at his lips.

"dude you're gonna get us arrested."

a hand reaching up to wrench the younger's fingers from his mouth, taehyung scowls, "don't dude me!"

"yeah, i guess dude was a bit heterosexual," jeongguk shrugs, "my bad."

breathing in sharply, he closes his eyes briefly before opening them once again, smile cold and eyes stoned.

"mr.jeon i don't know what game you're playing at but i'm not in."

"huh?"

narrowing his eyes, he huffs, "i'm not an idiot. i don't care if you don't like me back but quit acting like such a dick."

at this, jeongguk's eyebrows raise, "who said i didn't like you?"

if his stomach were a steamer taehyung swears the lid would have ricocheted off the frame and a balloon of wispy red would blast across the rows and rows of groaning plastics, a stain left to last.

"you know what, fuck you. have the godamn cake."

turning on his heel he's briefly aware of the warmth in his eyes and the galled flush that crawls from his neck and vines across the swell of his cheeks, hot and bitter at his tongue.

"hey! wait!" he hears jeongguk shout behind him as he marches up the aisle, hands balled at his sides.

fingers latch across his wrist, tight and grounding, ripping him from the furnace of hate that fills his eyes. instead, he's plunged into a well of drowning sorrow, cheeks wet with rejection and heart heavy with shame.

"stop." he snaps but there's no bite to his words, instead they are warbled and quivering as if he'd strung them on a clothesline during a fatal tornado, shrivelled and torn, "j-just stop jeongguk. i don't know what i've done to you but please leave me alone. i'm sick of being your rebound to toy with when you're bored."

it's terribly humiliating, there in the shop which seemed to double its size, cavernous and never-ending, face hot and skin wet with the red that fills his eyes.

maybe his expression conveys just this and suddenly there's arms winding across his waist and a hand behind his head and all he sees is the navy of jeongguk's shoulder. he doesn't push him away, couldn't if he wanted to, he's too drained to throw a fit so he stays still, world still blue, and let's jeongguk guide him out the double doors of the store, quiet and malleable.

"i'm sorry." he hears once their feet fall across the stone of the streets, "i didn't mean to make you feel that way."

taehyung doesn't know what to say and even if he did he had no courage to muster his words for he knew the moment he opened his mouth the locks to his eyes would fall and they'd fill and fill until he'd soak the pain away, a pruned figure midst the drying floods.

there's a pause and he knows, can feel it burning across his neck, that's jeongguk's looking down at him, his fingers still wrapped around his waist, holding him close.

there are lips grazing his forehead and fingers squeezing his hips. soft. apologetic.

"i like you too silver."

taehyung finds himself falling a little more.

and jeongguk does too.

~

[a/n]

physco is such a bop i'm hooked. i'm so proud of our girls and the best wishes to wendy, may she rest as long as she needs and recover well. ♥️

so...about taehyung smoking his juul. i mean to me i think it's his decision, he's old enough to make his own choice. as someone who cares for him, i hope he knows of the consequences and what's best for him, but really, in the end, it's his life - his choice. and besides, i don't think he's released a statement about it yet (correct me if i'm wrong >.<) so i don't want to jump to conclusions. ♡

but i can't believe we've come to the end of yet another year and decade (?) - i've heard some disputes over whether 2019 or 2020 is the end of the decade and 2021 is the beginning idk -. hopefully, we will learn, find and do more to help our surroundings and our race. i wish you all an incredible 2020 and a clean slate to start fresh and anew! study hard/work hard this year and stay happy, i believe in you! ✨

and of course, how could we finish the year without wishing the all-mighty kim taehyung a very happy 24th birthday! 🐯💜

sleep well and eats lots this year, keep smiling your beautiful smile ~