As promised, here is Chapter 69, "Seeing Stars", from Storm and Silence  in Rikkard's POV! Enjoy :)

________________________

Rikkard wasn't sure what he had been expecting when he had suddenly taken the initiative to lean down, but it wasn't resistance.

Resistance was not in his vocabulary. One did not simply 'resist' Rikkard Ambrose.

Yet she had pushed him away quite firmly, hard enough that he staggered back and released her wrists from his grip.

"Who do you think you are, telling me what I can and cannot be?" She was mad by the looks of it, her eyes alight with the ever-present fury she liked to direct his way. Her voice rose as she continued to shout at him, her brows furrowed and her mouth twisted into a scowl. "I can be anything I want! I could decide to be a member of a yellow piggy dance troop, and I could make it work if I wanted to!"

"You can never be a man," Rikkard replied, his eyes roving over her form, momentarily distracted by what he found there. He almost nodded in approval, then caught himself before he made himself a bigger fool than he already was. What he had almost done moments before...well, he wasn't sure what to do now that she had shoved him away.

Already the voices in his mind were slipping into overdrive. Does she not want me? Why did she push me away? I did something wrong, I blew it; of course she hates me, she always has. Why would her being drunk make a difference? It's not like you deserve her, anyway.

"I don't want to be a man," Lilly bit out, struggling to explain herself. "All I want is to be treated the same!"

"What's the difference?" he demanded, trying in vain to dispel his doubts about what had almost transpired between them.

"The difference," she answered with clenched teeth, "is...it is..." She floundered uselessly for words, and upon finding none, looked helplessly at him with her warm brown eyes, sending Rikkard's heart beating recklessly to a wild tune he had never known existed before.

"You see?" It was an effort to keep his voice level. "You can never be like a man."

She glared. "Will you ever give me anything but scorn?"

A part of him seemed to break at the question. Yes, he wanted to say. I would give you the world, if you asked for it. But that could never be. So he settled for, "Yes. I will give you your salary at the end of the month. If you do your work properly, that is."

Disappointment flooded her features, and he mentally kicked himself. Stupid, his mind sang. Such a stupid thing to say. Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid.

He watched as Lilly raised her chin in the defiant expression he knew so well, as she told him "Good" and turned away from him to march back to her chair. "That's all I want," she continued. "Money enough to be free."

"Oh, you'll have money," he said, his little finger twitching at his side. "You still won't be free, though."

Her head snapped towards him. "How so?" she demanded.

Rikkard marched back to his own chair and sat, steepling his fingers as he looked her straight in the eye. "Just like in marriage, you'll still be tied to a man--to me." It was strange to find the concept not the least bit alarming. It felt natural, having her around, with her constant chatter and one-sided visions of the world. Having Lilly near made him feel almost light again.

Her eyes narrowed. "Yes. But unlike in a marriage, at the end of the day I can go home and recuperate. And unlike in a marriage, if I ever get sick of seeing your stony visage every day, I can resign."

His hands tightened into fists at the words. She had unknowingly confirmed his earlier doubts--she did not want to be near him, could not stand him, found him unworthy of her presence--Just as well, his mind interrupted. This way she won't discover how poor of a match you really are for her.

"But nobody else would give you a position," he said instead, willing his anger to fade into his daily emotionless expression, hoping to avoid any possibility of her gauging his emotions toward her.

She seemed to consider this for a second, then conceded his statement. "True," she mumbled. "Seems you're stuck with me for now."

It was embarrassing how quickly he relaxed at her words as he realized she wasn't going anywhere; that he could keep her all to himself. He wondered if she ever thought about him the way he was thinking about her. Rikkard had certainly never felt this way in his life. It was foolish to think that she could, he knew, but all the same, he wondered.

Lilly was glancing at the floor, regarding her feet with confusion. Coming to an eventual conclusion, she slowly rose from her seat and took a few wobbly steps forward. Rikkard watched her closely, trying to forestall her from hurting herself in whatever drunken scheme she tried next.

"Is something the matter, Mr Linton?"

"My shoes," she growled. "I forgot them in the powder room, and my feet are getting cold."

He nodded shrewdly. "Be careful," he advised. "You didn't look too steady on your feet, earlier, and it would be a shame if you survived the gunfight only to break your neck in my office."

"I was perfectly steady!" she cried out indignantly. "The floor was attacking me!"

"Pardon?" He frowned as she didn't answer, chalking her words up to her drunken state. He waited patiently as Lilly tottered over to the bathroom to reclaim her shoes, shaking his head as she returned with her items in hand. It was strange how such a confident woman could turn into a complete clumsy girl when she was inebriated.

The girl had just made her way halfway to her chair when she slipped.

It was instinctive for Rikkard to move quickly and efficiently, and he had always prided himself on his reaction time in any given situation. But as Lilly began the descent to the ground, Rikkard shot forward to catch her as she stumbled back, his arms wrapping around her waist to hold her close.

For a moment he was numb.

He had not held her this close since the ball all those weeks ago as they had danced under the candlelit chandeliers of Lady Metcalf's ball. She was just as he remembered--soft, warm, and small, her scent filling his lungs as he breathed her in.

He remembered at the last second to pull her up, to keep them both from crashing to the floor, and stopped halfway as she gazed up at him in a daze.

"What did I tell you?" he murmured.

She blinked, her eyes wide and bright as she looked at him.

"What," he repeated, "did I tell you, Mr Linton?" He wasn't sure he was breathing, not even subconsciously aware he had leaned forward so that he could count every freckle dotting her smooth skin.

"T-to be careful," she whispered. "You told me to be careful."

"Yes," Rikkard agreed. He allowed himself two heartbeats of silence, taking her in. She stayed put in his arms, unusually pliant, seeming to wait for his next move. His blood pounded in his ears as he heard himself say, "Too bad I don't ever listen to my own good advice."

And then he threw his caution to hell and condemned himself to the forbidden taste of her lips.

It hit him like a sledgehammer.

The kiss was like finding out he had an unlimited supply of gold, or discovering all his enemies were dead, or even that he never had to pay his employees to work for him ever again.

He kissed her willingly, completely; demanding everything and nothing from her all at once. He was nothing and no one as he enveloped his lips with hers, nothing but a wisp of wind, or perhaps a speck of dust. Lilly. This was Lilly he was kissing, and she was all that mattered now, in this moment, in this little pocket of the world.

Heat raced through his body, leaving him deprived of all rational thought. There was only one thing on his mind, and that was to prolong this feeling he was experiencing, something he did not have a name for. She was filling him up, making him whole again, fixing the holes in his heart and mending the tears in his soul. The need for her flowed in his veins, through his bloodstream and his nerves.

Lilly Lilly Lilly was the mantra in his brain. It rejoiced at the sensation and feel of her, lighting up his insides like a Christmas tree as he surrendered to his instinct to savor and worship her.

Rikkard shattered himself in that kiss, in that spark of her, as he suddenly, truly, deeply felt what it was like to feel happy for the first time in years. He was as free and unburdened as a branch swaying in a breeze; like an eagle getting its first taste of the air. There was no moment he could name, no event he could recall, that had ever aroused this much feeling within him.

He poured himself into the kiss, letting her in, cradling her figure, reaching for more and finding everything he had ever wanted right in front of him. It was bliss, he realized, with no small amount of surprise, that had consumed him; bliss that had found him at last.

And then she was kissing back.

She moved with him and for him, her lips melding with his own, certain and steadfast and determined. It was as if a lightning bolt had struck him. She was here. She was responding. She was kissing him with equal force, no less demanding and never once hesitant. Her mouth explored his own with a quiet confidence that he matched with unbridled joy.

He felt her bite down on his lower lip, drawing him in, and then her hands, pulling him closer. A sound then came out of her that he had tried not to anticipate--a moan, followed by a sharp intake of breath. He was so surprised at the noise that he broke the kiss and stared down at her to make sure he had heard correctly.

Seconds passed as Rikkard watched her, reassuring himself that she had, indeed, seemed to like the kiss, and had reciprocated, and that he wasn't delusional. Lilly watched him back, wide-eyed and beautiful, huddled still in his arms with no attempt to free herself from his hold.

"Now do you believe me?" His rough voice broke the silence between them. "You could never be like a man. Trust me. I would not have done that if you were one."

He didn't wait for a reply before kissing her again, eager to lose himself once more in the whirlwind of chaos he had thrown himself into. There was no coming back from this. He found he didn't care.

Lilly's hands were wandering now, over his chest and down his arms. He almost shuddered at the contact. It had been ages since he had allowed himself any form of intimacy with another person. He couldn't remember the last person who had even dared to touch his sleeve, let alone his front. Her small hands tried to wind around his muscles, then switched to yanking his shirt when it was discovered they weren't big enough.

Rikkard's lips trailed to the side of her precious mouth, lingering as he gently pressed tiny kisses to her skin. A growl escaped her this time and she tried to speak.

"Let...go...of...me!" The words were emitted haltingly through a series of quick nips and tugs on her bottom lip. He brushed a finger over the smooth surface of her cheek, prompting her to seize him by the lapels and engage in another lengthy kiss.

"Why?" he rasped once he released her gently. "You don't seem to mind."

"I'm a girl!" she cried angrily. "I'm not supposed to be in control of my emotions. That's your job! So stop the hell touching me!"

"Why don't you stop?"

Her fingers traced an invisible map down the side of his face. "Because I don't bloody want to!"

His heart leapt. "Well, I'm similarly disinclined."

She went to hit him, but he caught her wrist mid-motion, and the other fist that soon accompanied the first. He stepped forward and leaned down, and suddenly their lips collided once more.

This kiss was a shockwave to his core.

It was fast and hard and frenzied, like they were wild-blooded racehorses galloping to the finish line. There was a burning intensity between them, building and glowing and threading them together. Lilly kissed him with a force so fierce she nearly knocked him over into the desk. It was bright and brilliant and so typically her that he found himself smiling into her lips, pulling her down towards himself in response. His hands skimmed over the small of her back, the barest echo of touch making her shiver.

The kiss became intent; both of them seeking more of the other. It slowed as they sought the finer aspects of the act--a lingering touch here, a breathy sigh; the slightest bump of noses there, followed by a quick snippet of a kiss. It kept on until Lilly gradually sank forward to rest on his chest, completely at ease, tucked close to his thundering heartbeat where he wanted her to rest forever.

Rikkard's hands flew up to stroke her cheeks, and he watched her eyes flutter open after she broke the kiss. She leaned into the feel of his fingers roving across her skin.

"Come." His fingers tugged her face back to him with a gentle insistence, and he marveled at the way she shifted towards him. She was before him again like the empress of the night--completely ethereal in her beauty; a fiery spirit that set his shadowed world ablaze. He would never grow tired of looking at her wrapped safely in his embrace, his own little light in his arms.

She was so excruciatingly lovely.

Lilly looked up at him, blinking very slowly. Her grip on his front suddenly loosed, and she swayed.

"Miss Linton!" He tried to rouse her from her stupor, but to no avail. "Miss Linton!" He tried again, hoping against hope that the happiest moment of his life was not about to end.

His dreams snapped and the world came crashing down around him as Lilly dissolved into unconsciousness.

__________________________

A/N: I finally finished the scene you've all been waiting for! Hahaha :)

So the first part of this chapter was meh to me, but the kiss! I am actually quite proud of how I wrote the kiss scene; it's my first time writing a fully-fledged scene like that and I realllllllly like how it turned out. I read this chapter in S&S like 10 times while writing this lol.

Do you guys like how it turned out? Let me know what you think :)

I will now try to write the other requests people had as well, but updates for those might be slower than they already are since I'm currently trying to focus on and update my other story (Dead Suitors Tell No Tales). So have patience (I know it's hard, given my horrible updating record) but I will get to them eventually! :)

As always, please make sure to VOTE or COMMENT to support the fanfic!

Thanks so much for your guys' amazing support; means the world to me <3